How to be a Good, Nurturing Parent
by Scorpiogal
Summary: Hello Boys and Girls! Today we're going to talk about families. Do you have a good family? Of course you do! Do you have a good daddy? Who's yur daddy?
1. Default Chapter

You know what, I already know that it would be incredibly insane for me to make a sequel….but if I don't get this idea out, I won't be able to concentrate on the others... 

Oh well! ^_^ Coping skills….

For those of you who have not read the story "Brownies"….- - Though I'm sure you've passed it many times looking for the mad sex stories…..grrrr…..Or just want to laugh….I will clue you in on things that might confuse you. But whether you've read the last story or not, my stories are weird enough for anyone! ^ ^ V

There was a lot of sex or need for sex in the last story. Mostly Inu and Kag… (^_^ Okay, so I'm a mad sex writer too. Catch me if yu can! :-P) Shio, my OC was in Brownies and he's in this one too! ^ ^ He's a fox/dog demon who is Inu Yasha's best friend and he's earned a huge chunk of the shikon jewel…by playing "hide the magic egg roll" with women who possess them. (^_^ don't you just love my choice of words?) 

(CQ: - - Please! Your ego is expanding at rates of which we cannot measure….)

Sumiko is my new OC and very cute! ^___^ She's Shio's younger sister who is now in the form of an eleven year old girl. But things shall change…*insert evil cackle* oh yes they will….. Sashimi came back as a goddess and told her younger brother Shio that he needs to find a mate. I'm eating a porkchop! ^_^V 

(CQ: o_o how is that related to the first story?)

(SG: WHERE'S THE BEEF! ^~)

I am now on a mission to bring Shio back to par!! *determined look* he's a lot different then when I first introduced him so I will work to make him like he was in lead the way and the hentai story!! BONZAI!! Naraku was turned into this freakishly kawaii little white monkey! ^_^V 

Introduction.  Blue Spot

            "Kagome! Breakfast is ready! I've made your favorite!" Mama called up the stairs. 

            "Okay! I'll be right down!" Kagome called from behind the bathroom door. She looked herself hard in the mirror and nodded. "Okay Kagome," she said to her reflection. "Time for the most important test of your life!!"

            She reached deep into her bra and held a home pregnancy test over her head. "Be strong Kagome!" she told herself and pulled down her panties. She had skipped a period and she knew there was something wrong. Inu Yasha noticed too because he couldn't smell her PMS…though that made him happy because the smell made him dizzy and sick to his stomach after a while. You see, that's why having a great nose is bad. (AN: I should know.; ;;;;;)

            And of course, she was reminded of the night where Inu Yasha was taken over by Sumiko's sex spell and screwed her senseless. (AN: ^_^ Like I said, you will love my choice of words….)

            So she ran home as fast as her vintage brown school loafers could carry her and "borrowed" a home pregnancy test from her mom. 

            AND NOW SHE WAITS FOR THE RESULTS!!!!

            As she waited she silently pleaded, _Please don't be blue! Please don't be blue! Please don't be blue! _

The color faded in.

            "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!"

            The car alarm of an SUV across the street went off. Souta actually looked up from his video game and while he was distracted, Garbon the Vicezoid K.O.'ed his fighter. "Aw jeeze!" he shouted in agrivation.

            Kagome's mom came running to the bottom of the stairs. "Kagome?! Are you okay in there sweetie??"

            Kagome jumped at the sound of her voice and shouted back quickly. "Yeah! I'm fine mom!!" she made a silent sobbing noise and looked back at the result. "Real fine." T_T 

            A huge blue dot taunted her from the strip of white.

            "Out of all of my middle school tests, it had to be this one that I passed!" she complained out loud. What was she going to do about this one?? What would her mother say?? What would the kids at school say??? What would Jesus do??? What would Inu Yasha say????????

            She took a deep gasping breath and paced back and forth on the bathroom tile. "Stay calm, Kagome. Stay calm." Unfortunately, teen pregnancy causes you to talk to yourself….

            "If you can purify demons with an arrow, and use your futuristic logic to get your illiterate friends from the past out of danger……you can figure out how to get out of this with as little scrapes and booboos as possible!"

            "Kagome?" Souta knocked on the door. 

            _"What is it, Souta?? I'm trying to concentrate???" she snapped._

            Souta sweatdropped at how wrong that comment sounded and asked. "Who are you talking too?" 

            "I'm talking to Bloody Mary! Can't a girl go to the bathroom in peace?!" she cried.

            "Sheesh! I was just wondering!" he said. She heard him go downstairs. 

            "Think, Kagome, think!" she sat on the toilet seat and tapped her forehead a couple of times with her knuckles. "Okay…….first I'll tell my friends. They might be able to help me with school stuff……..then I'll tell Sango and Kaede. They'll be able to help me with explaining and cover up problems……..Inu Yasha….." she sweatdropped. "How could I ever tell him? He can't even handle my PMS, can't imagine what he'd do if I went walking around with a baby in me! I guess I'll have to tell him, otherwise he'll figure it out himself and I'm lunch meat." She looked down at her feet. "But there's also the problem with my mom. "

            Finally, someone came and turned the car alarm off.

            "But there's still the problem with my mom….how am I going to tell her? What if she'll treat me different? What if she won't let me go back to the feudal era?" she sighed. "Maybe I should tell Inu Yasha before I tell her. That way if she does get mad, she won't surprise him by trying to decapitate him when he comes to get me."

            Someone knocked on the bathroom door. 

            "I'm in here!" Kagome called.

            "Kagome?" it was her mama. "Grandpa has to go to the bathroom, sweetie!" 

            She sighed and opened the door. "Okay, I'm out." 

            Grandpa rushed in and she walked passed her mom to the stairs.

            Mama gasped and screamed, "OH DEAR GOD!!" 

            "What?!" ;;; Kagome asked.

            Mama pointed at the back of Kagome's skirt. 

            Kagome contorted her waist to get a look and her heart sunk. She had forgotten to throw away the results, and the slip of paper was glued to her butt, blue spotted side up. Kagome spun around and ripped it off the back of her skirt. She laughed nervously and started, "Uh, well Mama, I can explain…." ;;;;

            "Who is it??" her mother shouted. 

            "Huh?" Kagome looked at her nervously.

            "Who's the father!!? Who did this to my baby girl?!" she shouted and grabbed Kagome by the arms.

            "Was it that Sakimoto boy???" 

            "Uh, no." ;;;;;

            "Was it that neighbor boy, Shirotsu????"

            "No." ;;;;;

            "Then it was HOJO!!!" 

            "No..." Kagome gulped and closed her eyes. "It was Inu Yasha." ;;;;

            Mama's eyes suddenly widened.

            "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

            The car alarm of the SUV across the street went off again.

            "THANK GOD!!" Mama threw her arms around Kagome, lifted her in the air, and did little pirouettes down the hallway while laughing joyfully. Really not the reaction Kagome expected.

            "Ma-Mama?" ;;;

            "Yes my sweet angel dear?" ^_____^ ***

            "Did you hear what I said? I said Inu Yasha's the father!" ;;;

            "Why yes indeed I did hear! I am so proud of you, Kagome!" ^_____^ ***

            Kagome sweatdropped. "Um….why?"

            "You've finally given me what I've always wanted!" ^____^ she shrieked happily. "Dog eared grandchildren!!!" 

            Kagome looked down at her a bit frightened. "How long have you always wanted-?"

            "Oh, Kagome!" ^___^ her mom hugged her again and gave a celebrated laugh. "If it were going to be with anyone, you couldn't have picked a better son in law!" ^_____^

            Kagome sweatdropped. She was more confused then relieved. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

            "Kitty-chan!" 

            A little girl skipped up a hill with a smile on her face and a song in her heart! ^_^ 

            She wore green, gold and white kimono play clothes. She was a kitsune/Inu with a big busy red and white tail and long reddish brown hair that she kept back with a white ribbon near the back of her neck. She carried a big sack over her shoulder and a little white monkey clung to her arm like an accessory. (Who was actually Naraku. Remember how the little monkey that's with Nobunaga looks? He looks like that! ^ _ ^)

            "We made a good haul, Chocolate! Kitty-chan will approve!" ^_^V she said to the little monkey.

            The white monkey glared at her. 

            At the top of the hill was a huge mansion. "Kitty-chan! Sumiko is back from shopping!!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. "Kitty-chan!!" 

            No answer came. She looked from left to right.

            "Where's Shio-sama, Chocolate?" she asked the little monkey – whom didn't reply. 

            She darted around the side of the house carrying the sack on her shoulders which was twice her size. In the backyard, two soldiers where standing and facing the goldfish pond that Shio and Sumiko had installed a month or so ago. They noticed her and one of the soilders, who had a short topknot called to her, "Oi, Onna no ko!" 

            Sumiko sprinted over to them and sat the bag down. "Hi!" she smiled up at them. 

            "Konnichiwa. Are you Aka Sumiko?" the one with the chubby nose asked.

            "Yup! Sumiko-chan, thaaaat's me!" she said pointing at her cheeks.

            The two soilders exchanged looks and asked. "Can we ask you a few questions?" 

            Sumiko smiled innocently up at them and shielded her eyes from the sun. "You're tall! Have you ever killed anybody?" 

            The guards sweatdropped. Then the topknot one said, "Let's not get off subject. Are you the daughter of Aka Shio?"

            "Nope. Shio-sama doesn't have a daughter. Elder sister calls him a run-around pup!"

            The one with the chubby nose snickered behind his hand till the topknot guy asked. "Are you related to him at all?" 

            "Of course not! I'm his little sister!" she smiled. Naraku rolled his eyes.

            The guards sweatdropped again then the topknot one asked. "Don't you have any other parents?" 

            "Yeah! I have three! They live in the sky!" she pointed toward the clouds above them. 

            The men looked nervous. "So you're all alone right now?" 

            "Not right now. Right now, Sumiko is standing with two tall guys and Chocolate Monkey Man!" she patted Naraku on the head. "Otherwise, Sumiko is with Shio-sama, and we have lotsa fun!" ^__^ ***

            The chubby nosed one cleared his throat nervously and said, "Actually, we're here to take you to him. He is the slave of our princess now, and-"

            "No, no, no!" Sumiko laughed and waved her hand at them. "That's not true! Shio-sama doesn't believe in slavery! ^_^ Just friends." 

            "He's a slave now."

            "Shio-sama is a free spirit!" Sumiko's smile grew a serious air to it. "Elder sister said, he's like a wild horse that can't be tied down!" 

            "Little girl, you have to come with us! Shio isn't coming back and he wants you with him." The guards took a step toward her and she took a step back.

            "Shio doesn't want to be slave!" Sumiko's expression became a bit sterner. "If you're holding him against his will, Sumiko will be mad!"

            "Sumiko," the chubby nosed guard said.

            "We're not going to hurt you or Shio, we just-"

            "You're lying!" Sumiko frowned and pointed at them. "Shio's unhappy, and you need me to make him do things!" 

            The gaurds sweatdropped. "How would you be able to tell something like that?" the topknot guard asked.

            "Sumiko knows! She can see it in the light of your eyes!" she shouted. The stars in her eyes brew brighter. 

            She grabbed her sack and swung it over her shoulder. The chubby nosed guard charged forward to grab her but she hit him hard over the head with the sack and knocked him out. 

            The topknot guard looked down at his bruised and battered partner. "What did you do???" 

            Sumiko reached into the mouth of the sack and pulled out a moss covered rock. "Shio-sama collects medical fungi!" ^__^ she smiled. 

            The man put his hand on the hilt of his sword and came at her. "Why you-!"

            Sumiko threw the moss covered rock at his face and knocked him out. 

            "Mean old men!" she stuck out her bottom lip. She picked up the rock and put it back in the sack with the others. "Poor Kitty-chan." She sniffed the ground and found their scent. "Come on, Chocolate! Let's go find him!" she left the sack by the door and skipped off to find her brother. 

*****************************************************^_~V

I don't own Inu Yasha, it's not like I ever will either!! Don't ask me if I do!! 


	2. Idiot Boyfriend

Maybe if I reupload that Behind the Scenes story after everytime it gets deleted, I can get a record for most deleted story! What do you think? Sound good?

I tell you what, someone REALLY does NOT have a life to keep telling on me like this.  -_-

Chapter 1. Idiot Boyfriend

"WHAT?!?!?!?!"

Everyone in WacDnolds turned to look at the table in the corner of their fine fast food establishment, where the four school girls sat.

Eki leaned forward. "You're PD??" 

"The doctor said you're-p-p"

"Pregnant?" Kagome whispered and waited for everyone not at her table to stop staring. "Actually, I took a home test, it was positive so, here I am!" 

"Kagome," her friends looked at her worriedly. Then the one with short hair asked, "Was it that abusive boyfriend of yours?"

            Kagome sweatdropped at the sisterly worried looks they were giving her and brought the straw of her soft drink to her mouth slurping loudly.

            "Kagome!" they shouted.

            "YES! It was him okay!!?" she shouted.

            Everyone there glanced over at them again, a little more afraid then before.

            Kagome glared at them. "What is this, a nickelodeon?! Go order your food, peons!!" 

            They all looked away quickly and went back to their business. They heard the lady at the register ask the next person if they wanted a combo meal.

            Kagome huffed and looked at her friends who went from nervous to shocked. "What??" she asked.

            Her three friends leaned in and whispered to each other. "She IS pregnant! She's moodier then usual!" 

            "Tin roof rusted!" 

            "HElLo!!" Kagome growled. "I'M RiGht heRe!!" 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - *

            It was a pretty normal day at the little mansion by the lake, or so it seemed to be a normal day. The servants were up out of bed earlier then the family living there. They made Tea, rice, shrimp rolls…..the greasy smell filled the house and woke up a certain someone with a doggy nose. 

            This time it wasn't Inu Yasha, uh-uh. 

            This certain someone twitched his nose at the smell of breakfast and his wolfy dog ears twitched in his waking process. He grunted sitting up and scratching himself behind the right dog ear. His pretty emerald eyes slowly opened and his long red eyelashes fluttered. He looked at a long mirror on the other side of the room where he saw his hair, messed up from sleep yet still, it was a very sexy type of messy. His green kimono shirt hung off of one shoulder but was still tied into his suit so that the right half of his chest showed. He blinked unevenly, in a morning daze until he heard a long moan next to him and a thin pale arm fell over his lap. Then he remembered what he was doing there. His eyes popped and he looked down at the woman asleep next to him. 

            Trying not to make any sound, he gathered some of his hair up into a ponytail on top of his head with two sheets of it, loose by his face. He straightened his shirt and retied it, then got to his feet to run. But a strong tug on his right arm told his otherwise. He made a surprised sound and almost fell backwards. He looked back at his arm which was shackled to the arm of the woman. His getting up to run, woke her up and she smiled up at him lustfully. "Where do you think you're going, Shio?" she asked. 

            "Come on, lady! Don't you know a one night stand when you see one?" Shio asked tugging at his arm again. 

            "Oh, but I thought you wanted this?" she pouted and held up a small, shiny fragment of glass. 

            He glared at the fragment and growled at her. "Not if I have to sell my soul to get it! The job was prostitute! Not concubine!"

            She shrugged still smiling. "Same difference." 

            "Let me go!" he tugged at his chain again. "This is not how it's supposed to work!" 

            "Sorry, Shio." She said standing up and looking at him like he was a fine piece of jewelery. "You're just too good to let go!"

            Shio nodded as if she had a point. "You'd be surprised at just how many young women have told me that….But doesn't it creep you out at all that, physiologically, I'm seventeen….and chronologically, you're nearing the age of thirty!"

            She shrugged again. "Not at all." She tugged his chain back. "I might give you this jewel later. Let's go take a bath and maybe we'll discuss it further after lunch." She walked out of the room, pulling him behind like a dog on a leash. 

            "Aw, man!" Shio whined. "Am I getting paid for this at all??"

            Inu Yasha sat in a tree nearby the well pretending to be asleep and waiting patiently. Shippou sat leaning against the trunk of the tree with his head resting on his hands. After a few moments of spacing out in boredom, he looked up at Inu Yasha. "Hey, Inu Yasha? Are you asleep?"

            Pause of silence.

            "Yes."

            "What are you going to do after the shikon jewel is complete?"

            Longer pause of silence.

            "Inu Yasha?"

            Long pause of silence, but not as long as the second one.

            "Inu Yasha?"

            ……

            "Inu Yasha!?" 

            "_I – DON'T – KNOW!!!" Inu Yasha growled. _

            "Are you going to be with Kikyo or Kagome?" Shippou asked.

            "Feh! When did it become your business?" 

            "Well, I was just wondering who you would go with. You know? Like what if you had to chose between one of them and the other had to disappear forever. Who would you pick?"

            Inu Yasha didn't answer.

            "Inu Yasha?"

            No answer.

            "Inu Yasha! The silence is getting annoying!!"

            "_I already told you I don't know!" Inu Yasha shouted._

            "You would have to know if it ever happened!" Shippou shouted back. "Honestly! Can't you make up your mind!?" 

            Inu Yasha huffed loudly and frowned down at Shippou. "When you hear my silence again, it means I'm done with this conversation!"  

            Excited by his anger, Shippou jumped to his feet and shouted. "_Yeah?!__ Well if you can't answer, then maybe you should reflect on the meaning of life!!!"_

            Inu Yasha stood up on the branch he was sitting on. With a frustrated growl he leapt into the treetops and away from half-pint, questioning kitsune kids.

            Shippou folded his arms and a loud angry sound that resembled one of Kirara's growls escaped from him. "That Inu Yasha! Someone should really tell him to grow up!" 

            Sumiko skipped down a dirt path through the forest with Naraku clinging to her shoulder. She was humming a song she had learned from Shio. Then when she got to the part of the song that she remembered the words to she cried. "Sing along Chocolate Monkey Man!" Naraku looked at her in shock as she sang at the top of her lungs. 

"-BABY I KNOW I'M A MAN WHO'S MADE MISTAKES! 

I'VE STILL GOT SOME LEARNING TO DO. 

I MADE OUT – WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND THE OTHER DAY!

AND NOW- WE'RE BEST FRIENDS TOO!!! YEA-AH!!!!-"

            "Cookies?" Mama sat a plate of cookies on the table in the living room. 

            Kagome shook her head but Souta grabbed a handful of chips ahoy and shoved them into his feeding orphis. "_Mmmmm_!" he chewed with a happy boy look on his face. 

            Kagome gave him a disgusted look and he backed away from the table and ran upstairs. 

            Mama sat down at the table and pushed a tall glass of milk over to her daughter.

            Kagome looked up at the bright smile on her mother's face. Why the heck was she smiling?? Every other girls mother's would be freaking out and saying, _"You little whore!! How could you do this to me?! Your motha! Did I raise you to be a skanky little pasty??" _

"What's wrong, Kagome dear?" her mother asked taking a cookie from the plate and biting the edge of it.

            Kagome watched Mama's calm front and asked, "How can you just sit there and act so – so –" 

            Mama chewed her cookie, wondering how many calories were in that bite then swallowed it anyway. She licked any possible crumbs off of her lips and asked, "I hope the word you're searching for is a synonym for 'beautiful'."

            "-how can you act so okay with all of this?" she finally asked.

            Mama raised the cookie to her lips and took another bite. 

            Kagome sweatdropped.

            Mama swallowed before she answered. "I trust you, Kagome."

            Kagome banged her head on the surface of the table. She looked back up with a red bump on her forehead. "_You trust me?! I just got pregnant with a wild demon man, and you still trust me?!"_

            Mama took another bite and Kagome's forehead hit the table again. 

            Kagome looked up at her irritatedly with her chin on the table. "That must be a pretty damn good cookie!" 

            Mama smiled, "Mmm, chocolate chip is my favorite!" ^__^ 

            Kagome sweatdropped and groaned against the tabletop. 

            "I really do trust you Kagome." Mama smiled at the top of her daughter's head. "I want you to be happy and I know you will be happy with a good boy like Inu Yasha." ^_^ 

            Kagome didn't say anything.

            "Besides," Mama bit the cookie again and winked. "The pregnancy test already proved how much you like him!" ^_~ 

            Kagome sweatdropped even more. "_MOTHER!!"___

"Don't worry, Kagome. I'll help you, that's what mother is here for!" ^_^

            Kagome blinked and sat up a little to look at her. "Mother is here as a backup for teen pregnancy?"

            "Of course! ^___^ What else?"

            Kagome sighed loudly. 

            "I'm always open for babysitting, we'll go find a good doctor tomorrow morning to make plans and such! ^__^ And of course you'll have to homeschool…that is, if you'd rather stay at home during your pregnancy.."

            "Oh yeah."

            "And we'll have to make plans for where the baby is going to sleep. We could put the baby in the guest room, Souta's room, my room, or even your room!" ^___^ 

            Kagome just sat their nodded as her mother drew the blue prints for the future.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ V^_~

YAY!! ^___^ 

Time for the special story segment!! ^___^ 

Shio and Sumiko's Karaoke!! 

DANCE LIKE A MONKEY!!! ^_________^ 

~*

{A group of people are sitting in a dimly lit parlor where there is a screen in the middle of the floor in front of a two screens that are in front of a wall. Shio and Sumiko come out from different screens and stand back to back}

Shio: *grinning* Ready Sumiko? 

Sumiko: *looks seventeen years old* Ready Shio! 

Shio: Lay it on us, CMM!! ^__^ 

Chocolate Monkey Man: *puts record on the turntable off screen*

Sumiko: *starts doing a dance*

Shio: *bobing his head while holding something like a microphone*

  
Oooooooo. 

  
Ahhhhhhh.   
  
I know what you want. 

  
And I know what you need. 

  
But i'm gonna screw it up, yeah, 'cause i'm an idiot, 

  
and i'm your boyfriend, yes I am.   
  
And i'm gonna take you out, leave my wallet home, 

  
then i'll use you cell phone, baby, 

  
long distance, and i'm your boyfriend. 

  
_{Shio dances with Sumiko}_

  
Baby I know, 

  
i'm a man who's made mistakes. 

  
I've still got some learning to do. 

  
I made out with your best friend the other day. 

  
And now, we're best friends too!

  
Yeeeeeeah!  
  
And I know what you want. 

  
And I know what you need. 

  
And i'm gonna screw it up, yeah, 'cause i'm an idiot. 

  
And i'm your boyfriend, yes I am.   
  
And i'm gonna get you a gift (Hey), but it's something I like too. 

  
Hope you like this Norelco, Big Trimmer. 

  
Has my name on it, and i'm your boyfriend.   
 

  
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-by. 

*does a jump and slide*  
  
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da!!  
  
I'm gonna get real drunk and call my baby up, 

  
4 o'clock in the mor-hor-hor-hor-ning! 

  
Wake you up.   
  
I'm an idiot. 

  
Pick up the phone. 

  
Come on. 

  
 *starts whisper-singing* 

  
Now look, let's get in my dad's SUV, 

  
and we'll go over to my house, my crib, my pad. 

  
I'll tell my mom to go to sleep, 

  
then we'll have the living room all to ourselves, you see. 

  
We'll put on some great DVD's I picked up. 

  
How about, like, something like the Matrix.   
  
Ooooooh. Ahhhhhh.   
  
I can turn my boom-box up, and make the bass 

  
smack the side of my momma's couch-uh. (Yeah!) 

  
Hey baby, you like fine cooking? (Yeah) 

  
'Cause you know what? 

  
I got a Swansons dinner in the freezer, 

  
with your name on it. 

  
Check it out.   
  
Yeah.   
  
I've got a permanent wave, yeah. 

  
I got an ogilvie home perm, baby.   
  
Ooooo. 

  
Ahhhh.   
  
Uh! 

  
I honk the horn. 

  
Can you honk the horn? 

  
Can you honk the horn? 

  
Let me hear ya honk it. 

  
Come on. 

  
And let me hear you say uh-uh! (Yeah) 

Ladies in audience: Uh – uh! ^__^

  
Let me hear you say uh-uh-uh! (Yeah) 

Ladies: Uh – uh –uh ! ^__^

  
Let me hear you say uh-uh. 

Ladies: Uh – uh!  ^__^

  
Let me hear you say uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh. Oh-oh Yeah!


	3. Denile

^_____^ Oh happy day! 

Remember that picture of Shio I drew? Well a lot of people asked me if I could send it to them, and it used up a lot of my time and some people didn't even get to bask in the glorious beauty that Shio is! T_T

But now that is settled! ^-^ 

I have put Shio's picture up in deviantART.com! ^_^ Now anyone can go look at him whenever they want! He's under the name "Pimpmaster Shio" of course! ^_~

Chapter 2. Denile

            Well finally, Kagome's last day in the future had come. You can bet that a certain dog-earred someone was sitting right next to the well, waiting for her like the faithful puppy he is but won't admit to! ^____^ 

            Inu Yasha let out a low growl of impatience. He sat in his usual meditation pose which was totally contradicting. Meditation is for clearing the mind and cleansing the soul, he looked constipated and annoyed. The irritation was so thick, that his right leg started to tap on the grass and he tapped his fingers on his haori sleeve. 

            If she forgot again, he would not be happy…..at all…..in any way….whatsoever….

            She did that sometimes, and him being his paranoid self, thought she did it on purpose. How much time had gone by? Three days, five hours, and forty-two minutes – but who was counting? Not him. Of course not. 

            How much time now? Fifteen seconds??? It must have been at least fifteen minutes!! The seconds were getting slower!! Time was slowing down as he knew it! Leaves were falling off of branches in slow motion, birds were flying so slow they were almost frozen. When was she going to get there??? What was happening to the world?!? What's going on!!? Oh the horrible twist of it all!!! Why??! –

            "Inu Yasha?" Miroku somehow suddenly appeared right next to Inu Yasha. 

            "What?" Inu Yasha glanced at him out of the corner of his eyes. His leg stopped twitching and he stopped tapping his fingers for a moment.

            Miroku cleared his throat and bent his eyebrows meaning that what he had on his mind was incredibly important. "Have you seen your friend Shio lately?" 

            Inu Yasha thought about it. It had been months since he last saw Shio and that was when Sumiko entered the picture. He shrugged. "Not really, why do you wanna see him?" 

            Miroku got down on his knees so that he was at Inu Yasha's level. Inu Yasha leaned forward a little. Miroku's eyes flashed and he said, "I want to become his student!" 

            ……..

            Inu Yasha blinked. "Say what?"

            Miroku reached into his priestly garb and withdrew a scroll, handing it too Inu Yasha. "My cousin sent this to me earlier today. He heard about a dog demon in the east that was training under the consepts of love and war. The perfect martial arts teacher and the perfect doctor of sex advice."

            Inu Yasha sweat dropped, looking at the scroll. "You want to be his student?" 

            Miroku suddenly stood up. "Just imagine all of the women who would be willing to bear my child if I learned to attract them like Shio!" he held up a determined fist and had an intense look about him. 

            Inu Yasha gave him a funny look. After a few moments he rolled up the scroll. "Whatever." He held it out to Miroku who took it back.

            "The next time he visits, I will be attracting women with the grace of an enchanter!" Miroku said. With that, he marched away in the direction of the village.

            Then the smell of a pure hearted, futuristic schoolgirl drifted out of the depths of the well. Inu Yasha's ears perked and a backpack was tossed over the side of the well. He decided not to act like he was excited or anything. He didn't move but said in an annoyed voice, "You're late – again."

            Kagome put an arm over the side of the well and peeked out at him. "Well so-rry! I had some important things to do."

            Inu Yasha stood up and scowled at her. "The jewel shards are important. What made you late?"

            Kagome paused, staring at the grass. What had happened that morning? Well her mother had given her numerous books on pregnancy and raising children to read. Plus an added bonus of Childhood Weekly and a copy of this month's soap opera schedual. "My mom wanted me to clean my room before I left."

            Inu Yasha raised an eyebrow. "Clean your room? I thought it was always drawn to look clean."

            "Well, it was dirty today, okay?" she frowned at him. Was it really any of his business?........actually, she wasn't sure if it was or wasn't. After all he was the father….

            He took her pack from her and tossed it over his shoulder. Then he sniffed loudly, as if suddenly realizing something. He looked her over as if trying to figure something out.

            Kagome's heart jumped into her throat. Was he able to tell she was pregnant by her scent?? 

            She gulped and asked as calmly and normally as she could. "What? What is it?" ;;;

            He looked at her questioningly. "Are you using some kind of new shampoo or something?"

            Lie, Kagome, lie!! "Well…"

            "No. It's not that…." He said. He continued to sniff, probingly. What was this scent? It was familiar somehow, but he hadn't a clue as to what it was! It wasn't like a soap or anything….her scent had altered in a way, even if it was teeny tiny…..

            Kagome sighed trying to get rid of her fear, and moved so that her scent became mixed with the wind and said, "Let's go to the village. I'm starving."

            Inu Yasha still said nothing but he was still interested in the identity of the smell.

            Sumiko walked through a field of grass where a heard of sheep were grazing. As she approached they stirred as if she was a hungry wolf coming toward them. "Look, Chocolate Monkey Man!" she pointed at them. "Those dogs are eating grass! Weird, ne?" 

            Naraku rolled his eyes as he clung to her right arm. They passed the heard of sheep and walked over a path toward a more hilly region of land. 

            "Kagome!" Shippou ran and jumped into her arms. 

            "Shippou-chan! How have you been?" ^_^ Kagome couldn't help but smile at how cute he was.

            "Kagome!" Sango waved over to her. She had her boomerang strapped over her shoulder for some reason. Kirara sat by her feet in kitten form and mewed when Kagome came into view.

            "Hello, Sango!" Kagome greeted her with a smile and a wave. She glanced at Inu Yasha who was staring at her. "What?!" she shouted. "Why do you keep looking at me?!" 

            Shippou was hugging Kagome when all of a sudden he noticed a change in scent as well. He sniffed loudly into the front of her shirt. Kagome looked at Inu Yasha who was also consentrating on a scent. "WHAT AM I?!" Kagome suddenly shouted. "-A FREAKING SCRATCH AND SNIFF?!"

            Shippou looked confused. 

Inu Yasha looked confused. 

Sango was totally in the dark as to what was going on.

            The weirdness was partly broken with the entrance of Miroku who was sporting a woven basket hat on his head. "So when do we leave?"

            "As soon as possible." Inu Yasha suddenly looked at him. He had dropped the subject of the strange smell….for now…..

            "Dinner is served!" ^_^ 

            Kagome dished out the bowls of ramen and cans of lemon water that she somehow kept cold in her backpack. 

            Sango got her bowl and raised a pinch of noodles to her mouth and noticed that Kagome didn't have a bowl in front of her. "Kagome, if you didn't make enough, you can take some of mine. I have more then enough –"

            "That's okay!" Kagome waved her hand at her and reached into her backpack. She pulled out a can of pepsi that was also somehow cold like the lemon water. She pulled out a bag of sour cream and onion chips, and a container of melted cheese to go with it.      

            Everyone stared as she dipped her chips in the cheese and drank the pepsi at a zest filled speed. 

            She raised the pepsi can to her lips and realized they were staring at her. She looked at each of them and sweatdropped. She set her pepsi can down and smiled at them all. "Well, you'll never believe what happened at school today!" ^_^ she said.

            Everyone went back to eating except for Sango, she sat still staring at Kagome as the girl rambled on about some incident that didn't interest anyone anyway. Her chopsticks remained together between her lips. 

            Kagome laughed at the end of her story like it was a funny joke. Miroku gave her a courtesy laugh and Inu Yasha 'feh'ed.

            Sango set her bowl and chopsticks down, "Kagome, may I have a word with you?" she asked.

            Kagome looked at her and shrugged. "Um, sure I guess…"

            Sango stood up and helped Kagome to her feet and they walked off into the forest. When Sango was sure they were out of earshot she turned to face Kagome with a serious look on her face.

            "What is it, Sango?" Kagome asked.

            Sango looked at her for a few seconds before asking, "Kagome, is there something you'd like to talk about?"

            Kagome's eyes widened a little and she looked a bit hesitant. She glanced back at where the guys were for a millisecond. It looked like there would be some beating around the bush. "Like what, Sango?"

            Sango swung her arm and exhaled fast. "Like…..any girl things that you'd like to talk about?"

            "What kind of girl things, Sango?"

            Sango looked her straight in the eye, and Kagome couldn't look away.

            "Kagome," she asked. "Are you – pregnant?" 

            Kagome's eyes widened and she grabbed Sango's shoulders. "YES!!" 

            "Oh my god!" Sango grabbed her shoulders. "Is Inu Yasha the father???"

            "Yes!!" Kagome said.

            "Oh my god!" Sango said again. "Have you told him yet??" 

            "No! I'm a coward!" Kagome said.

            "Oh my god!" Sango said for the third time. She shook her head in amazement. "I thought your relationship was a little more platonic, but-"

            Kagome stopped her right there and explained the situation.

            "Oh my god…" Sango said. "I'm so happy for you! You know this means Inu Yasha will have to give up Kikyo or else!"

            "I know." Kagome said. Though it sounded good, it also sounded like she was forcing Inu Yasha to be with her.

            "Well it's his fault, he should be there for you!" Sango said, as if reading her mind.

            "What if he doesn't want to??" Kagome asked worriedly.

            "He'll have to! I'll kill him if he doesn't!" Sango said. "A father just can't abandon his children. I'm sure he knows that too. I'm sure Inu Yasha has _some honor to him…"_

            Kagome sighed. "Wishful thinking. I hope so….I don't know if I'll be able to do this on my own!" 

            "Oh my god." Sango couldn't stop saying that. "How far in are you?" 

            "Apparently not far enough. There aren't any sighs yet…"

            "The heck their aren't!" Sango said. "You're eating strange foods and Inu Yasha has been confused about the way you smell all afternoon!"

            "I guess you're right." Kagome replied.

            "You'd better tell him before it gets even more obvious." Sango said.

            "I'm afraid of what will happen." Kagome looked toward camp with a worried expression on her face.

            "It's better he finds out now then later though. Whether it's a bad or good reaction, try to drop the news as easily as you can." Sango said.

            Kagome sighed. "Thank you, Sango."

            "No problem. We're the only girls in the group, we ought'a watch out for each other."

            "Yeah." Kagome said. "And you're probably right. The sooner I tell him the better."

            Sango nodded. "If you want, you can wait here and I can send him over." 

            Kagome sighed shakily. "Hurry, before I chicken out."

            "Kay." Sango pivoted and fast walked back to camp. In about a few seconds, Inu Yasha came walking over and Kagome could feel her heart sinking. It was going down like the titanic. Inu Yasha came like an approaching iceberg. 

            The dog boy stood a few feet away from her, waiting for her to say what she had to say so he could get back to his ramen before it got cold. 

            "Inu Yasha?" Kagome said in a strange voice. She cleared her throat and asked, "Maybe you should s-i-t down or something."

            "I'll stand." He said. Kagome frowned. His ramen was just so important wasn't it?!

            She sighed and went over to a boulder she could use as a chair. Maybe he didn't need to sit down, but she did. She weaved her fingers together and looked down at the grass trying to think of a way to begin. 

            Inu Yasha got a little bit closer. He glanced back at the campsite anxiously then back at her.

            Then she suddenly asked. "Inu Yasha, do you like me?"

            What? Inu Yasha's thoughts of ramen were quickly taken over by confusion. "Where did that come from?" 

            She asked in a slightly louder, nervous voice, "Do you like me??" 

            Inu Yasha got even more confused and he stuttered out the answer, "Wha – uh – I…guess so…"

            "Who do you like more, Kikyo or me?" she asked even more nervously.

            Did she have to bring this up now? He wished that she had waited till he had digested what he had already eaten. He searched for a way to answer.

            With his pause, Kagome's fear almost went through the roof. 

            "Well…….I…….I don't really understand……." Inu Yasha said touching the side of his forehead.

            "Inu Yasha, I'm pregnant!" she suddenly shouted so loud that everyone at camp turned their head to stare. 

            She didn't dare look at Inu Yasha, and she doubted she could. The view of the grass became blurry for her. She clentched her teeth and tried to hold back any sobs that tried to force themselves on her.

            Inu Yasha was silent for what seemed like a long time. The only sounds that could be heard were Kagome's sobs and the wind in the trees. "What?" he asked. Whatever emotion that he was feeling wasn't coming clear in his voice.

            "I'm in the early months of it. I just found out two days ago. I took a test at home…" she glanced up at him. He looked a little bit pale…and he had a far off look in his eyes. His expression was undeterminable. 

            She went on for fear of more silence or a bad reply. "Mama is helping me, she seems pretty okay with it, I was afraid to tell you, I didn't know how you would react, _you're the father…."_

            Inu Yasha began to shake his head very lightly. "No."

            "-Mama's okay with you being the father, I was really nervous…."

            Inu Yasha shook his head staring out with a disbelieving look in his eyes. "No….no…."

            As Kagome watched him, tears started to roll down her cheeks but she kept going, "-You're the father, there's no way anyone else could be it, you're the father….!"

            "No!" he turned around holding his ears and Kagome was terrified. 

            "Please, Inu Yasha." She begged.

            "It's not mine!" he said.

            "It has to be!" Kagome said. "You're the only one who could have…."

            "It has to be someone else!" he said. 

            "You're the only one I've ever done it with!" she cried.

            "There has to be someone else!" he shouted.

            Kagome burst into tears.

            Inu Yasha sank to the grass. He was ready to sit down now. 

            How could this happen? He had chosen Kikyo, what would she think if she found out he turned around and did this to her reincarnation!? "It can't be me!" he said. 

            "I knew it." Kagome said aloud to herself. Inu Yasha stared at the grass and said nothing. 

            "I knew it!" Kagome got up and went back to camp sobbing into her hands. 

            So that's what was making the smell. Kagome really wasn't kidding. She was pregnant and he could smell her organs at work taking care of a new beating heart. How could this happen?? 

            He suddenly noticed that he was at camp again. Sometime during his thinking, he had taken himself back to camp. What he found there was Sango and Shippou hugging Kagome, who was still sobbing. She was sobbing into Sango's chest while Sango stroked her hair. Shippou sat in her lap and tried to offer her comfort. When Sango and Shippou saw him, they glared viciously, like he was the scum on the scum of the earth. Miroku wasn't exactly giving him pleasant vibes either. He looked thoroughly displeased, and was doing his best to avoid Inu Yasha's presence. 

            Inu Yasha didn't say anything. He went over to his spot, sat with his ramen and continued to eat, trying to ignore the death glares.

            As soon as Kagome heard him come in she tried to stifle her sobs. She didn't know why…..if she wanted to, she could make him feel guilty. But he didn't want her, so she would just have to pretend that she didn't want him either. This thought made her hiccup and filled her with pain and thoughts of revenge. 

            Miroku slurped his lemon water loudly and Sango huffed like an angry lioness. 

            Kagome put her trash in a bag that she carried with her and pulled her pajamas out of her bag. "I'm going to go take a bath. Then I'm going to sleep."           

            Sango and Shippou stood up with her. "Would you like us to come with you."

            Kagome shook her head with her eyes shadowed by her hair. "I want to be alone right now." 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

            hmmm….depressing…..T_T 

            This is supposed to be a humor story! What the sam hill happened?!

            Well, the next chapter is sure to bring laughs….payback is a bitch, ya'll…and the guilt trip is ever so fun to deliver…..


	4. Growth Spurt

You know what, I am very sorry about the lack of updates, but my teachers have been giving me less mercy then usual. Like this weekend for example, the only thing I did the whole time was work on my stupid Charlie Chaplin report! And tonight I had long assignments from each class! And I know it sounds weird, but the more pressure that's put on me, the longer it takes me to do things.

Yeah. Not all boys who got their girlfriend pregnant will stay with them….the basterds…

Chapter 3. Growth Spurt

            Kagome was sitting under a large tree doing her algebra. When she really thought about it, homeschool was a really good idea. She didn't have to walk around school all day hearing students whispering rumors about her getting "knocked up" and questions about who the father was. And when it came to shard hunting, all she had to do was go home, get her homework, and go back to the well! It took no more then five minutes to do, actually. Best of all, Grandpa didn't have to call the school anymore and feed them silly excuses or stories about her fake illnesses! ^__^ 

            "I should have thought of this a long time ago!" Kagome said aloud to herself. "Would've saved me a lot of stress." 

            She heard the grass crunching as if someone was walking toward her. She looked up and saw Shippou holding a top, a teddy bear, a box of crayons, a cup and ball, a baseball, and a pair of wooden swords. With a loud grunt, he dropped everything on a soft patch of grass under the shade of the tree. He gave her a large excited grin. "Okay, Kagome! I'm ready for the baby!" ^_^

            Kagome blinked, then smiled at him and her eyes grew large and watery. "Oh, Shippou!" she was touched.

            Shippou giggled and held up one of the wooden swords. "I can't wait till he gets here!" he imagined a happy little toddler only a little bit shorter then him wearing a chibi red kimono. His image of the baby had long, fluffy black hair, large brown eyes, and little dog ears that were perfect triangles on top of his head. He imagined himself and the baby skipping along a beaten dirt path surrounded by rich green grass, trees that swayed and sang, and a bright blue sky up about with a sun that smiled down at them. 

            "We're going to have lots of fun!" Shippou chimed. "We'll play hide and seek, and crack the whip, and we'll chase grasshoppers, and I'll teach him how to make paper boats, and-!"

            He was so adorable! Kagome hated to burst his bubble, but-

            "Shippou-chan! The baby doesn't come for another eight months or so!" she said.

            Shippou stopped listing his ideas and his jaw dropped. "Another eight months?! _What's he doing during all that time?!?!"_

            Kagome laughed and hugged him. "The baby is busy growing during that time! Until then, you'll have to be a good boy and wait patiently."

            Shippou sighed and cuddled into her arms. "Don't worry about Inu Yasha, Kagome." 

            Her smile faded as he reminded her of him. Inu Yasha still denied any connection to the child.

            "I have an idea." Shippou looked up at her with a heroic look on his face that Inu Yasha sometimes got after he one a battle. "We should find Shio!" 

            Kagome's eyes widened. "Uh, Shio?"  
            "Yeah, Shio!" Shippou said. "He'll know what to do about Inu Yasha! He has connections!" he smiled and nodded.

            Kagome sweatdropped. "_Connections?_"

            "That's what he told me!" Shippou said. "What do you think? Wanna try it?"

            He had a point. Shio was a master at knowing how minds such as Inu Yasha's worked and how to bend it to his will. However, Shio was also a master at getting into endless amounts of trouble. He was very smart, but Kagome never considered Shio to be a perfect roll model for Shippou. 

            "I guess so," Kagome finally replied. "I can't think of anything else."

            Shio's trail took Sumiko to a large castle in the East with a high white wall surrounding it to keep out invaders. Sumiko approached the gate where there were two guards holding spears. She paused in front of them, a smelly little red head from the outside, with a little white monkey hanging over the back of her right shoulder, and dirt spots on each cheek.  

            She put her hands behind her back and rubbed her fingers. The guard on the left looked down at her with a serious expression on his flat face. He had a large nose and even larger forearms. The guard on the right raised an eyebrow at her and gripped his spear tighter between his fingers. Sumiko took one step forward and the spears crossed in front of her making a _clink sound. She blinked down at the spears and looked up at the two guards. "Excuse me," Sumiko stepped back and bowed politely. "My name is Sumiko. I'm here to pick up my big brother, Shio-sama." _

            The gaurds were not impressed at her polite request. 

            "You're a goblin child, aren't you?" the guard on the left asked.

            Sumiko gasped at him, taken aback that he would ask such a thing. "Sumiko doesn't know what you're talking about!" she smiled cutely with large sparkly eyes. "There's no goblin as cute as me!" 

            "Whatever you are, we cannot and will not authorize a magic creature such as yourself to enter our village." The guard on the right said.

            "Sumiko's not a creature!" she said looking hurt. Then she pointed at the gate. "Shio-sama's in there, he's a wizardy demon person!" 

            "Impossible!" both guards said at the same time before the one on the left said, "The guards of this castle monitor this gate day and night, only aristocrats, courtesans, and other important people of the like are let in." 

            "We know magical creatures when we see them." The guard on the right said.

            "Why don't you run along home to your oni parents!" the guard on the left said, he was beginning to get annoyed with her.

            "Sumiko isn't an oni either!" she stamped her foot, though it wasn't very threatening. 

            The guard on the left raised his spear and whacked her across the face with the blunt end. She fell backward and put a hand over the hot, throbbing red mark he left there. She looked up at them with tears lining her eyes. "Owie." T_T

            "Get lost before we really hurt you!" the guard on the right said. Sumiko crawled a few feet away sniffling, stumbled forward and got up on her left foot. All of a sudden, a gust of wind blew past. It wasn't weak, it wasn't strong. It rippled through the grass and launched the seeds of dandelions into the air. They danced in circles and zigzags and passed by Sumiko's face. 

            Her eyes watered even more, as she felt a tingling in her nose. She gulped and felt it coming. "Ah…..ah…..TIEU!"

            BLING!

            The guard's eyes popped.

            "Ugh…" Sumiko sniffed and wiped her hands on the grass. Her hands were different though. They were bigger. They were in a different shape too. She looked at both of her hands at the same time in mild shock. She looked down at herself and the front of her shirt was sticking out so that she couldn't see her stomach. She stood up dusted herself off and felt her hips which where rounder. She was higher off the ground too. She must have been as tall as Shio.

            "Whoa!" she heard one of the guards say. Sumiko turned back to look at them. They were gaping at her like she was a display of fireworks.

            "Did that little brat just become a hot chick??" the guard on the left asked the other guard.

            "Unless my eyes are deceiving me, yes!" the right guard said.

            The left guard then turned to the right guard. "I'll bet the prince of the castle would like to have her."

            "Yeah. We might even get promoted if we present her to him!" the right guard said. They readied their spears and began to approach her with evil smirks on their faces.

            All of a sudden, Sumiko frowned and said in an older, deeper, femme fatal voice, "Not today, Shitheads!" 

            View of the sky.

            POW! CRACK! BANG! OW! CRASH! SNAP! POW!

            Somehow, they were still conscious, but the two guardslay on the ground in pain, moaning and twitching. 

            Sumiko dusted her hands then reached up and ran her index finger down the length of the raw mark that ran from the corner of her forehead, across the bridge of her nose, and down her cheek. "It still hurts." She said. "How dare you put a scar on a woman's face?!" 

            They trembled, fearing for their lives.

            "Ha. Don't flatter yourselves," she despised their cowardice. "I'm not going to kill you – today." She folded her arms. "Still, you must be punished." 

            Her eyes fell upon a sheathed knife on the belt of the right guard. She pulled it out and held it up for examination. It was almost as good as new; very clean, very sharp, so very perfect for what she had in store for them….

            She sliced the air with it a couple of times before looking back at the guards. She gave them a flat smirk. "I'm in the mood for a little castration." 

            The guards screamed.

_~_~_~_~_~_~_~

            So the group was on the road again. Inu Yasha didn't even argue about the change of plans, and for many different reasons, everyone wanted to find Shio. Inu Yasha walked in front with his hair shadowing his eyes and his head tilited forward. Kagome walked while pushing her bike. Shippou sat in the bike basket, Sango walked next to Kagome, chatting with her about girly things. Miroku walked behind them. He wasn't in back because he was slow, he was in the back so that he could watch Kagome and Sango's backsides shift back and forth as they walked. He found it a lovely show, especially since he hadn't been caught yet.

            Inu Yasha had been silent for a long time. He was either thinking deeply (I know, it's a shock…), withdrawing himself from situations of explanation, very confused, or some combination of the three. Miroku walked past the girls and behind him. He had to leave his perfect view for a moment, but he would be back to watch it later. He began to walk next to Inu Yasha, who didn't seem to notice he was there for some reason. Miroku watched him out of the corner of his eye.

            "Inu Yasha?" he suddenly said.

            "If you're going to lecture me on how I'm a jerk, I don't want to hear it." Inu Yasha stated. 

            "Relax," Miroku said. "I've just come to ask why you're going to see Shio."

            Inu Yasha paused for a moment, thinking over what he could tell him and what he couldn't. 

            "I'd like to talk to him."

            "About what?"

            "I'll know when I get there."

            "Come on, Inu Yasha," Miroku said. "Is Shio really the only person you can go to talk about things?" 

            Inu Yasha's shoulder got colder. "No offense." He said gruffly. This meant he was done speaking.

            Miroku sighed and glanced over his shoulder at the girls. "How are you feeling, Kagome-sama?"

            "Do you need to rest?" Shippou asked in a sweet little concerned voice.

            Kagome shook her head and smiled at them as if it would guarantee her answer. "I'm fine, thank you." 

            Sango smiled too and said, "In a way it's exciting that you're going to have a baby. Are you excited."

            Kagome's smile grew brighter. She loved babies, and had been imagining how her future offspring would look ever since she was a little girl able to understand that that was what little girls do later on in life. "I know, hopefully I won't screw this up." ;;;;

            Inu Yasha finally looked up at Miroku. His golden eyes were large and filled with many different emotions at once. "I don't get it." He said to him.

            Miroku looked away from the girls, "What don't you get?"

            "Yesterday, you weren't talking to me." Inu Yasha said not looking at Miroku, "Now you're treating me like everything's hunky dory…" 

            "Ah yes, well," Miroku started, "I was very disappointed in you yesterday, Inu Yasha. I think that men who run if they make mistakes like that are extremely cowardly, and whether it was your child or not, I was still surprised that you would leave Kagome to fend for herself." 

            "_What?!"_ Inu Yasha looked up at him in shock.

            "Think about it, Inu Yasha," Miroku said in a serious but gentle tone of voice. "Does Kagome seem emotionally or physically ready to take care of a baby _by herself?"_

            After that, Inu Yasha grew paler and became ever more like a zombie then before. He remained braindead before Shippou struck a nerve with his high pitched voice in saying, "Can I be the father?" 

            Inu Yasha half facefaulted and almost spun his head all the way around to look back at them. 

            Kagome gave a nervous laugh and patted him on the head. "I don't know about father, but you can be the big brother if you want!" 

            "Yay!" ^__^ Shippou cheered.

            "He has a point though," Sango said. "If Inu Yasha's not going to do anything, you might want to find a replacement father or something."

            "You think so?" Kagome asked.

            Sango shrugged. "It might help."

            …….

            "How about Kouga?" Shippou asked.

            Inu Yasha glared straight ahead, _yeah right, that whimpy wolf would infect the kid with his stupidity! _

Miroku watched him interestedly.

            Kagome sweatdropped. "Well, Kouga is loyal, but I don't think so."

            "Then how about Jinenji?" Sango asked. "He likes you."

            A vein popped on Inu Yasha's forehead. _That oafish, whimp?__ He's not good enough to protect Kagome! _

"Jinenji _is_ very sweet and kind to me," Kagome said. "But there's a huge age difference….Plus, I like him more as a friend." 

            Shippou, Sango and Kagome looked up at the sky while thinking before Sango asked. "Wait, what about that Hojo guy you were talking about from you time?"

            Inu Yasha began to tremble with his anger, seething silently. 

            Miroku blinked, and his eyes were wide open as he watched him. "Sweet."

            Inu Yasha's blood was boiling and his heart was pumping like crazy. The little Inu Yasha blood cells were running around inside of the factory-like organ shouting and trying to get things under control. Emotion workers flipping switches and pressing buttons, trying to calm him down. 

            One of the lesser ones ran up to another one and shouted, "She can't take much more of this!"

            "Hurry, red blood cell!" the other one grabbed his shoulders and pointed across the room. "Get to the main power switch! STOP THE MADNESS!!!" 

            The red blood cell ran across the chamber and up to a huge switch. On one side, it was marked "Flight" and on the other side it was marked "Fight". He grabbed the lever and pulled it down to fight.

            Kagome shrugged and looked upward. "Well, Hojo is very confident, and trusting, and sweet, and he gets all As…but…."

            "Oh come on!!" Inu Yasha shouted, unable to stand it any longer. 

            Everyone stared.

            He got up in Kagome's face. "Whoever this Hoho guy is, he sounds like a throw pillow! Why do you keep attracting stupid idiots?!?" 

            "_Well you're the first one I found, Inu Yasha!!" Kagome shouted back even louder._

            He backed off for a moment, shocked that someone her size could contain such a voice and temper.

            "_Unless you start feeling the urge to step in pal, I suggest you back off!!!" she shouted._

            *Cheetah growl*

            Everyone backed away in fear, especially Inu Yasha. He hid behind Miroku. He peaked around him at her and Miroku said. "Oh my…" ;;;

            Inu Yasha gulped and said in a small voice. "I hope that's the mood swings talking…" ;;;;;

~_~_~_~_~_~~_~

            In a part of the castle was the court, where the family sat and hired entertainment to please famous guests and rich friends. Shio sat on his forelegs. He looked to his right where the princess was sitting with her parents. On the other side of the parents was their plump son, the prince, who was such a sicko, even Shio found him distasteful. He looked to his right where there were five other very attractive men watching the Harpsichord and chime musicians and dancers hired to perform that afternoon. They were the princesses other concubines. He looked down at his wrists and ankles, which where shackled together with spell scrolls tied into the works. He sighed heavily. T_T

            Finally the music ended and there was clapping. 

            "Thank you, thank you!" the small band leader bowed with the other players on either side of him. "We're here all week!" They bowed some more and walked off into the crowd. The lord of the castle was about to call for the next performer when all of a sudden –

DING DONG!

Everyone: Oo *looking around confused*

            "Was that a doorbell?" the lady of the castle asked.

            "I think so," the lord said, stupefied. "But weren't doorbells not invented till the twentieth century?" 

            A guard went to open the door. A beautiful Arabian woman drapped in silky robes covering her whole body and her head. The only thing visable was her eyes, her milk chocolate colored forearms and hands. And her wrists were lined with yellow gold bracelets. There came a few whistles from various men as she walked across the floor. She kneeled in the middle of the floor in front of the lord and lady and the room went silent. Then some of the musicians from the side realized that was their cue. One of them manned the tambourine and shook it for fourteen counts before the Japanese musicians who somehow had Arabian flutes started playing them. The woman stood up and struck a sharp foot stance. She began to walk forward in cross footsteps moving her hands in wavelike motions with the music, she turned right as soon as she was right in front of the lord and lady. As she passed Shio she glanced down at him. He was staring up at her wide eyed.  Her eyes were diamond shaped, and deep brown with long eyelashes, she winked at him a second before she reached a stone statue on the far end of the room. 

As soon as she got there, other types of Arabic horns joined in and that was when she dropped the hood of her robes back on her shoulder. Her hair was raven, soft, and wavy. She dropped the rest of the robes and she was dressed like a belly dancer underneath it all. Veils, silkiness, strange curved shoes, stomach showing, hanging beads on her outfit, and a red veil covering her mouth and nose. She pulled a large red veil from behind her long hair and used it to dance with. 

The prince leered at the belly dancer as she glided past him. "Who is she?" he asked in a deep serpent-like voice. 

The lord and lady had no idea. No one knew who invited her, but she was so good to watch, no one complained. 

Shio raised an eyebrow at her. She was obviously an enchanter. She was weaving a spell on them all. He was almost surprised that no one at all was able to feel the excess magic that she carelessly spilled with each dance move. Too much. The only human in the room who didn't seem impressed was the princess sitting next to him. She scowled at the belly dancer. Probably jealous that the dancer was able to attract so much attention. 

The belly dancer's hips quivered and all of the beads bellow her navel jingled like a tambourine. She twisted her long veil around her wrists and pointed at him. 

His eyes widened when he realized she was pointing to him. The princess noticed too and hissed at her parents, "Get that whore out of here, now!" 

"Wait now, dear. It's just part of the dance." The lady patted her daughter's shoulder. The princess gave the dancer a warning glare as she pranced over to Shio wrapping her veil tighter around her wrists. Shio looked up at her. He decided to pretend to be entranced like every other men in the room. Which wasn't hard, because without the suspicious aura, he thought she was a total fox. She did the quivering hips again right in front of his face then dropped her wrists behind his neck, and pulled him forward with her veil. He got to his feet and she wafted around him. The magic got stronger, most of the enchantment came from the fabric in the veil. She whirled around and tossed the veil into the air. Everyone gasped as it came down on top of them, and they both disappeared in a puff of red smoke. 

BLING!@#$!%^&*()

            Shio fell backwards and was surprised when he landed outside on the grass. He looked up and saw Sumiko, his short, cute, eleven year old sister. "_Sumiko__?!" _

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Confused? Good! ^_^ 


	5. The Sneezles and Sango's Special Talent

Bad news: I accidently broke one of my nice brown bead bracelets. Which I loved. T_T 

                        I lost one of my good eye candies, and I'm feeling particularly lonely. 

Good news: ^_^ I met an old friend from my last highschool! The boy with the beautiful long hair! But he was the eye candy I lost. T_T  

Stupid news: I can't breath out of my right nostril!!!

New news: One of my friends made me jealous by showing me this person who had fun disclaimers. I want to have fun disclaimers too! So I think I'll start doing that….but not in this chapter…^_^ 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Chapter 4. The Sneezles and Sango's special talent

            "Sumiko?!" Shio looked up at his little sister. She smiled down at him and gave a small wave. "Hi, Kitty-chan!" 

            He got to his knees, and held her shoulders. "What happened?? How did you get here?! Were are we?? What happened to the belly dancer??? How did you know I was here?!?!" 

            Sumiko cleared her throat lightly and said, "I saved you; I followed your scent; we're outside of the castle; the dace lady was an illusion that Sumiko invented-" she held up a red veil that was folded like a flag and reeking of magic- "Some mean guys came to our house and said you were here." She smiled cutely at him. "Kitty is welcome!" ^__^

            Shio stared at her for a few seconds, then looked to the side digesting the information. "Uh-huh." He nodded and gave a small chuckle. "Thanks Sumiko!" he hugged her as Chocolate Monkey Man climbed on top of her head.

            She hugged him back and laughed happily. Since Shio was in the perfect position, she also reached up and gave one of his dog ears a playful tug. 

            "Hey!" he pulled her fingers away from it and smoothed the fur on the sides, a little harassed. That was when he noticed her face. His beautiful eyes grew wide with concern. He gently held her cheek in one hand and raised his index claw to trace the spear mark. 

            Sumiko watched his finger and tried to jerk her head away from it, but he kept a firm yet gentle grip on her. She gasped at the stinging sensation she felt as he ran his finger down the mark. "Your face – what happened??" he whispered.

            She looked off to the side, because he wouldn't stop staring at that stupid looking mark on her face. She told him about the gaurds at the gate hitting her and calling her a goblin and not letting her in.

            When she finished, his lips thinned into a straight line and his eyes narrowed a little bit. All of a sudden, he stood up and began to walk toward the castle with the high wall again.

            Sumiko watched him, in confusion. "Where is Kitty-chan going??"

            "I'm going to find the guard that hit you, then I'm going to castrate him."

            "Kitty, wait!!" ;;;

            "Stay here, Sumiko! I don't want you to see this."

            Sumiko slumped down in the grass and blew at a piece of her hair that was hanging in front of her face.  Oh well, she tried to warn him. 

            A few moments later, Shio came fast walking back, pale and fearful. "Let's go home, Sumiko!!" 

            "But, Kitty-!" 

            "This castle is weird!" He didn't have to castrate the guards of course, because they were already member-less! He shuddered as he broke into a run. "I don't even want to think about what would have happened to me if I had stayed any longer." ;;;;

            Sumiko and Naraku sprinted right behind him. But as Sumiko was running, she felt the itchy feeling in her nose again, "Ha-ah-TIEU!" 

            _BLING!_

She was taller again, but she kept running behind Shio like nothing happened. And only a few seconds later, she got the feeling again, "Ah-TIEU!" 

            _BLING! _

Shio glanced back at his eleven year old sister. "Catching a cold?" 

            "I dunno," she shrugged. She honestly didn't know what was going on, actually. She didn't even know she had changed those last two times. 

            Shio looked forward again, so he could concentrate on the road. He didn't want to run into a tree like last time….

            Sumiko sneezed, "Ah-TIEU!"

_            BLING!_

- - - 

            Sango went into the forest and sat up against a tree. Kagome was at camp finishing up her homework, Shippou was waiting for her to be done, Inu Yasha was withdrawn into one of the most densely leaved trees near camp, and Miroku was cooking for once. But really, all she needed was for him to be busy. There was something she wanted to try that she couldn't do in front of Miroku. 

            She pulled her feet together and folded into a butterfly stretch. After a few moments, she slowly picked up her feet and carefully placed them behind her head. Then she raised herself up on her hands into a sitting/leaning position.

            Ta-da.

            She was startled by the sound of clapping coming from her right – so startled, that she lost her balance, in her sitting position, fell back against the tree and slid onto her back, tottering with her feet still stuck behind her head. She felt like an upside down turtle. 

            "Well done, Miss Sango!" Miroku came into her view smiling and still clapping.

            Sango's face went rose red. That pervert must have followed her. And she knew he must have been enjoying this view of her. "Houshi-sama, aren't you supposed to be cooking?"

            "I took a break." He had stopped clapping but he still stared at her open thighs. 

            Sango tried to release her legs but she couldn't. Her feet were stuck. She was trapped.

            And Miroku didn't look like he was going to be leaving any time soon.

            Sango frowned and looked away feeling like she was going to die of embarrassment. "Why don't you take a picture, it'll last longer."

            Miroku bent forward a little bit giving her a large happy grin. "Well aren't you in an interesting position?" ^___^ 

            Well this was just the greatest day of Sango's known life. "Stay away from me, Miroku, I mean it!" 

            He began to walk towards her, still smiling. "But Sango dear, it looks like you need some help!"

            Oh yes. Sure, she could just imagine the kind of "help" he had to offer.

            "I don't want your help! I can free myself!" she tottered and strained to free her legs, or at least roll herself over, the roots of the tree were holding her legs up and in place and – hell, him touching her butt was bad enough, she didn't want him to touch her _there _too!!! 

            "Sango, dear," her reached out and grabbed both of her ankles. She looked up at him horrified. He bent forward so that his face was just inches from hers and she could feel his warm breath. God, he was _hot!! The evil grin on his face was different, not something she saw too often, but it was super sexy!! "Sango, dear, you know that if I wanted to, I could violate you in fifteen different ways right now…." he whispered in her ear. She blushed and bit her lower lip as her rising fear began a tug of war with her estrogen. _

            With a silent, painless _pop_, Miroku removed her feet from behind her head. "Wash your hands, the food will be ready shortly." He whispered making her blush deeper. He stood up straight, dusted himself off and began to walk back to camp. 

            Sango sat up, flustered, still shaky, and surprisingly to her, she was a little disappointed. 

            Miroku  smiled to himself and thought, _That was the best view I've had of her all day! And that look on her face before I walked away! At least I picked one__ thing up from Shio! ^___^ _

(AN: Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more! ^ ^)

            "Done!" Kagome slammed the cover of her math book shut and thrust it at her packback without any important papers flying out. She had of course, always wanted to do that. 

            "Kagome, how long is eight months?" Shippou said looking bored. 

            "Well let's see, you can count the months on your knuckles like this-" she showed him on his own knuckles. "-to figure out which months have 30 days and which months have 39 days – blah blah blah blah, blah blah blah. Ha ha! ^ ^ Blah-dee blah blah!" 

            That's what Inu Yasha heard, anyway. He sat in his reclining position, looking down at where Kagome and Shippou conversed. They were totally unaware that they were being watched through a square shaped opening in the tree's leaves, as if they were a show inside a green t.v. 

            He suddenly frowned when Shippou mentioned teaching the knuckle-months to the baby when it finally came. Why did everyone keep saying that it was his? Inu Yasha knew it wasn't his. Accidental children were something he just didn't do. Now Shio on the other hand, must have had several illegitimate sons and daughters all over Japan. 

            No, accidental children were for people who slept around, and Inu Yasha didn't do stuff like that! Not anymore at least….

            Miroku walked into camp and said something to Kagome and Shippou. Then Shippou pointed at where the food was cooking and said something back. Then Miroku freaked out and ran over to the pot, quickly pulling it out of the heat. If Miroku had what it takes, he could probably have had several sons and daughters with air rips all around Japan as well! 

            Wait a minute…

            When the baby was born, it would have to look like the father…but it couldn't look like him because it wasn't his!! …Right? 

            Of course it wasn't!

            But what if it was?

            It wouldn't be because it isn't!!! 

            Then Inu Yasha realized, the situation was a double bladed sword. If the baby was born, and it looked like him, it would mean that he would have disgraced Kikyo after she died for him and even saved his life a bunch of times. But if the baby wasn't his….that would mean that he would loose Kagome….she would be tied to another man! 

            And he knew the baby wasn't his so that meant…..

 _Holy crap!!!_ He thought, _I am just now realizing this!!!_

Inu Yasha jumped out of the tree. Somewhere in his thoughts, Sango had also returned to camp and changed into her regular normal clothes. But he didn't notice that. Right then, he had one thing in mind, and it wasn't Miroku's cooking!!

Kagome sat with Shippou in her lap. She looked over her shoulder at Inu Yasha who came stomping over, glaring at her. He stopped right in front of her and shouted, "Alright! Who is it?!!?"

Kagome blinked, not knowing what he was barking about this time. "Humma?"

"Who is he!! Is it Miroku?! Kouga??? I have a right to know!!!!" 

Kagome still looked confused.

Shippou leapt onto Kagome's shoulder and gave Inu Yasha a suspicious look. "What'chu talkn' bout, Inu?"

"You've slept with another guy! That's the only explanation!!!" Inu Yasha shouted angrily.

Finally getting the picture, Kagome set her bowl down on the ground violently. "Honestly, Inu Yasha, do you really have the nerve to ask me that?!" 

Before he could answer that with a smart mouthed remark she was in his face shouting. _"You're the one creeping around with Kikyo, flirting with me, then dumping me with your child which you gave up very quickly. And after all of the shard hunting, ramen cooking, and bad ass attitude I've had to put up with you – do you actually think you have the right to accuse me of something that you should know very well I would never ever do?!!?!"_

Inu Yasha shrank a.little and sweatdropped a lot. He had measured himself from the first time he met Kagome to yesterday. He was 6'1" when he first met her, now he was 5'11". 

Kagome turned her back on him, feeling like she was going to vomit, cry, and scream all at the same time. After a few moments, when she was still angry, yet calm enough to speak while knowing that she wouldn't wail on him mid-sentence, she said, "For your information. You're the first and only boyfriend I've ever had." And she thought to herself, _Hojo__ doesn't count. _

            "You were my first and only boyfriend, and you were my first and only sex partner, and you left me with your child. Thank you, I have such a good feeling about the population of men now!" She said adding sarcasm to the last sentence. Miroku and Shippou knew better then to open their mouth after that one. 

~~~~~~~

I'm going to stop here, I've run out of ideas for this chapter…which wasn't very good….pardon my low self esteem….

Anyway, I'll start up on the next chapter, please review and revive my poor and slipping moral. 


	6. Shio's Big Day

Wow. I am so jealous of my friend. Here we are, Scorpios both born on the same day, with the same hair and eye color, we both love the same things and think the same way….and she gets a boyfriend. Not just any boyfriend too, a very cute one with long brown hair that is beautiful (some guys don't look good with brown hair) and British glasses, and he is very smart, funny, and nice and he is totally not a jerk. I've known him longer, but she knows him better, and they make such a cute couple. I feel like I should have one…..

Why must an artist suffer so? Oh the torment….

Shippou and Inu Yasha: Sitting across from each other playing a game that tests the strength of minds, the will of one, and the chance of luck.

Shippou: *holds his chin, calculating his possibilities* hmmmmm….AH HAH! *draws an X on the paper and draws a line through three in a horizontal line. He laughs triumphantly and holds up the paper to show his work* Tick-Tack-Toe! Three in a row! ^___^ 

Inu Yasha: No way!!

Shippou: ^___^ -Barney got shot by a GI Joe! 

Inu Yasha: You cheated!

Shippou: ^___^ -Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, -"WHOOP! Barney's dead-!" 

Inu Yasha: *hits him hard on the head*

Shippou: AAAAHHH!! The pain!! T_T

Inu Yasha: *grabs him and shouts* There's no way you can win seventeen times in a row! 

Shippou: Sure I can! 

Inu Yasha: Oh yeah right. What are ya? Some kind of super genious?

Shippou: Only around you, Inu Yasha.

Inu Yasha: OO *hits him again*

Shippou: T_T Ow!! 

Inu Yasha: *huffs and puffs angrily before noticing the readers are here* Oh, hi. ;;;

Shippou: *rubbing the throbbing lump on his head* T_T Scorpiogal doesn't own any of the characters….oooohh, I think he gave me brain damage – ack! 

~ ~ ~ 

Chapter 5. Shio's Big Day

~ ~ ~

            The autumnal exinox had spread a blanket of chilly air over the rocky terrain of feudal Japan. The leaves faded into their warm crisp colors. One by one they would soon release from their summer home and fall with their others into crumpled piles all over the poor farmer's crops.

            The villages stationed around the mountains were some of the coldest. That's where Kikyo happened to be, though the weather never bothered her because she was always cold. 

            She walked up a beaten path that passed through the frosty blue-green grass and pebbles. Off the left side of the path, the grass led into a hilly, sweeping forest. On the other side of the path, the grass stopped at a steep ridge with a long drop, and a majestic view of the gray, snowy mountains shrouded in an ocean of mist. The sky was a grayish-blue that was fading into the oranges, purples and reds of the passionately setting sun. Kikyo stopped to watch it. She felt nothing for the cool, sweet air, or the great frozen mountains. She felt nothing at all. And when she wasn't feeling nothing at all, she was feeling anger, revenge, and hate. 

            During such times like a beautiful sunset, she would wonder why she used to find it so lovely. She had once believed that a sunset was one of many priceless gifts given to the world by the gods. And now she felt nothing. She felt nothing from its glow, she saw non of its magic. Zippo. Nothing. Ice.

            Maybe it was the peace of the scene, or the writers mad description skills, or a soul she had collected that wasn't agreeing with her, but subconsciously, she suddenly felt sad. Sometimes, whether she paid attention to the feeling or not, she sometimes missed not being able to find inspiration from a sunset, or a blooming flower, or a soulful song played on the fife or harp. In fact, the feeling not only made her feel really angery, but it also reminded her of her thoughts and dreams diary. You see, she had just started seeing a therapist, and the therapist told her after only one session that she should keep a record of her dreams and thoughts. Get it? A thoughts and dreams diary! What else would it be for?!?

            Sheesh….;;;;;

            Just because it was getting colder, it didn't mean that the demons would be completely gone or hibernating or whatever. There were still many ice demons and witches that hid themselves in the mountains and they were going to come down as soon as that fist snowflake fell. But it hadn't fallen yet, so haha on them!! They'd have to wait…

            Yet some ice demons could endure climates outside of the mountains, and one of those very demons happened to be following Kikyo. Though she wasn't completely aware of it. 

            (An: Just to be sure, I don't promote Inu Yasha/Kikyo stories either. They make me think of Sess/Kagome and I get freaked out again…)

            She knew their was something freaky following her because she was chillier then usual. She couldn't tell what it was or where it was though, that was the thing. It was pretty good at hiding itself. Maybe if she'd stop dressing like a priestess 24/7/365, then maybe the demons would drop their gaurds a little….what is she, glued to that uniform? It's not like she acts like a priestess anymore, she's all evil and stuff….but then again, the only characters who ever change their clothes are Kagome and Sota….Kirara and Buyo are naked so really they don't count….

            Anyway, back to professional narration….

            She stopped moving and sighed. There was no use procrastinating, so she figured she might as well let the demon know she knew it was their so that any fake ambush attacks wouldn't work. After it knew it was caught, it would then charge out of the forest like a rabid, wild animal, screaming and flailing and flapping, and she would destroy it seconds before it tried to rip her in half. So she decided to skip the pretending to not notice and get it over with. She stared straight ahead and said aloud, "You may stop hiding. I know your stalking me."

            The cold aura of the demon wavered for a split second before returning to normal, and staying normal. Nothing happened otherwise.

            "To sneak around is childish. Reveal yourself and I will kill you quickly." She said.

            Oh yeah, that would make it come out faster…

            Shockingly, nothing happened. 

            Without giving it a second thought, Kikyo kept walking like she was before. If the demon wasn't going to do anything, why should she care? If it ever decided that it was going to make a move, she was always more then ready, but if it didn't, she didn't care. She didn't feel anything about it.

-

            In the Aka house, Naraku had a special place to sleep. In the hanging basket Sumiko hung from her ceiling. And so that he felt all comfy-cozy, she added a baby blanket and a hook where she could hang fruit and candy for him to eat. Why did Naraku endure Sumiko's chokehold hugs and stay with her? Simple…because he had no other options. Where else was he going to go now that he was a miniature white monkey? Not the forest, he didn't have survival skills. Not the zoo, because they didn't have zoos in feudal Japan. (But then again, they didn't have therapists either…) He also didn't want to wind up one of those stupid trained monkeys that wear those stupid monkey suits and dance around holding out one of those stupid change cups and dancing while that stupid, creepy organ grinder guy who sorta looks like a carnie grinds his stupid organ and gets all of the stupid money that the stupid monkey would make from doing his stupid retard-o dance. So unless he wanted to go hang out at the hot spring where the bigger perverted white monkeys hung out and watch human chicks bathe, he would stay with Sumiko. 

            Plus, he liked the banana waffles she made him ever morning especially for him. Kagura couldn't cook like that, no sir…

            Naraku was woken up by a small hand reaching into his basket bed and giving him his morning noogie. He opened his eyes and glared at Sumiko who was standing on the tips of her toes to look inside his basket at him. "Rise and shine, Chocolate Monkey Man!" she said, louder then she needed to be. She reached in and scooped him out of his warm comfortable bed at the crack of dawn, and he soon found out it was because she was getting up early to make a huge breakfast for 'Shio's Big Day.' 

            She began chopping vegetables with super speed, breaking eggs and hacking meat. "Set the table, Chocolate Monkey Man! Today is super special!" 

            Naraku picked up a bunch of chopsticks which were like javelin poles to him and hopped over to the table. 

            Shio rolled over off of his futon and was waken by the smell of greasy Japanese food. He blinked sleepily and sat up on his elbow. He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes. "Sumiko?" he called down the hall in a lazy voice.

            Sumiko smiled, as he had woken up just as the meat was done. "Get dressed Kitty! The day is bright and pretty!" she rhymed. 

            She heard him moan and a few minutes later, Shio came through the door wearing a purple and red silk robe. His hair was down and he looked like he was halfway between reality and la la land. But he was still really pretty. He flopped down at his seat at the table and watched Naraku hop back and forth carrying each plate and dipping cup to the table separately. Sumiko came in smiling, fully dressed, wide away and happy. "Kitty sunshine!" ^_^ she smiled and set two large bowls on the table. She did a cute little bow and skipped back to the kitchen. 

            Shio looked on at where she disappeared and shook his head. He had no idea where she got all of that perkiness. Naraku finished with the silverware and lifted the lids off of the food bowls. Shio took a closer whiff of breakfast and he blinked himself awake. Omlette in one bowl and teriyaki and broccoli in the other, the food sparkled. 

            Shio gaped at the perfection. Sumiko came skipping back in and poured tea into his cup. "Breakfast is served!" ^_^ 

            Shio picked up his chopsticks and began to load up as soon as Sumiko sat down with him. Naraku also had a plate, with his special banana nut waffles with walnuts and maple sauce.

            (AN: eck! I made myself hungry! O_o)

            "Sumiko, this food is amazing!!" Shio said after a few moments. "How come you never told me you could cook??"

            Sumiko smiled and shrugged. When Naraku had vaccumed up his waffles he decided to sit on top of Sumiko's head and digest.

            When Shio was done, he decided that it was the best food he had ever had since Kagome's ramen. "Wow, Sumiko. I mean, if you had told me that you were such a good cook sooner, we'd-" suddenly he stopped speaking and looked up at her. She stood next to him, leaning forward, nodding and smiling while holding a plate. He narrowed his eyes and raised his eyebrows suspiciously. 

            Sumiko tilted her head to the side in confusion. "Something wrong, Kitty?"

            He glanced out of the corner of his eyes even more suspicious then before. "You want something, don't you?"

            She looked even more confused. "Nani?"

            -_- "You never cook. Maybe this is an attempt to get something out of me."

            Somehow this threw Sumiko into such a world of confusion, she stood there frozen in a massive stupor with her mouth hanging open.

            Shio blinked. "Sumiko?" 

            ……………

            "Sumiko?" he snapped his fingers in front of her face.

            ………..a small trail of drool dripped off her chin. 

            Shio sweatdropped and after carefull thought, tried to shock her. "Oh my god, Sumiko!! The world is ending!!!"

            …………..

            "Oh my god, Sumiko!!! There are some bad guys here who are trying to slit my throat!! Help me!!!" 

            ………….

            "That's cold." He said. "Uh…wait! I know..Hey Sumiko!!" he shouted. "The Rainbow Monkeys are now on CD rom!!" 

            O_0 "For REaL?!" she snapped out of it so fast, she threw her arms out to the sides and shwacked Shio across the face with the plate she was carrying. She looked around the dinningroom for the rainbow monkies, but there was only Naraku who was looking up at her in fear and shock and Shio who was lying a few feet away on his side with swirly eyes.

            "Ah, Kitty, don't get Sumiko excited like that!" she said sadly, realizing that it was just a trick. She went over to him, grabbed him but the fluffy opening of his kimonos and pulled him into a sitting position. His head fell backwards and he made a funny sound (AN: Kinda like Kenshin when he's hurt.) Sumiko looked at his dazed expression. She started to smack him across the face in a continuous pattern. He woke up when he started to feel the pain. "That's enough! Okay!!" 

            She let go of him and he held his cheeks in pain. "You know, all I did was say something to wake _you_ up." He said. "Such an abusing child." 

            "Sorry Kitty-chan. You're not hurt are you?" she asked in concern.

            He rubbed his cheeks and said, "If by not hurt you mean stinging and bruises, then yes, I'm fine."

            "Great!" ^_^ she said, going back to her happy place again. "Because today is your big day!" 

            He suddenly let go of his still throbbing cheeks and looked at her confused. "My big day?"

            She grabbed his face and kissed each cheek to make the pain go away. Then she smiled at him and said, "Today's the day we go out to find Kitty a mate!" ^_^

-

            Kagome put her hand over her mouth and began to tremble. She tilted her head forward and held her stomach with one arm. The very thought of it, made her wanted to scream, she thought she was going to die unless she held it in. She stopped trembling and remembered what he had said, and that caused her to completely lose it. She fell over and rolled onto her back, threw her hand out to the side and cried out in hysterical laughter. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAhahahaHAHAHAhahahaHAHAHA *snort* HAHAHAHAhaha HAHAHA-!!!!"

            Inu Yasha stood in front of her with his arms folded and his eyes closed. His expression clearly showed that he didn't think it was funny at all and didn't appreciate her laughing. His eyebrow ticked a couple of times. 

            Kagome's back arched and she rolled over onto her side-still laughing! After a few moments she gasped for air and began to gain control of herself again. Shippou was laughing, though he didn't understand what was going on, he was only laughing because Kagome was laughing and the laugh made her sound like a seal on crack. Kagome looked up at Inu Yasha, her face red and her eyes watering, and she wiped her mouth on her sleeve. She gave him a huge grin and asked, "No really, what do you want?" 

            Inu Yasha groaned and asked, "I asked you, _Kagome_," He sounded like he was trying to keep his frustration down. "If you have any…" his voice muted out on the last part of the sentence.

            "What was that?" Kagome asked, grinning and putting her hand to her ear. "Can't hear you in the balcony!" 

            Inu Yasha sweatdropped and shouted, "I wanted to know if you had any self help books!!" 

            Kagome exploded into laughter again. Shippou laughed with her again, yet he still didn't get it. 

            Inu Yasha glared at her and blushed. "Thank you for not laughing." ;;;;;

            She waved at him and calmed herself quicker this time. "No really, it's fine. What kind of self help books do you need?" Her grin got wider again. "Anger Management? How to be a Good, Nurturing Parent? How to test for Breast Cancer? How to-"

            "F*ck this." Inu Yasha threw his hands up in the air and began to stomp away, angry and mortified. 

            "Inu Yasha!" Kagome called after him. He turned around and she threw a stack of books at him. He was amazed at how many there were. How was she able to carry her school books, these books, lunch, change of clothes and her girly products all over Japan?? 

            "May they serve you well, oh silver haired one!" she said and burst into laughter again.

            Inu Yasha rolled his eyes. Kagome had been displaying some interesting mood swings with varying intensities now that she was in the fourth month. Her stomach was a little bit bigger then it was before – Not huge as in noticeable to strangers, but since Inu Yasha remembered that before her pregnancy when he saw her at the hot spring, she was in perfect shape, now there was a slight roundness there. But he still found her very pretty. Actually, for some strange reason that he couldn't understand, the farther into the pregnancy she got, the more attracted to her he was. If he didn't know better, and if he was the father (which he still knew he wasn't) he would have thought that it was Father's Pride…..but it wasn't his child, so that would be impossible. 

            He looked at the cover of the first book, _Be_ Happy With Who You Are!_ Oh wow, that sounded cheeky. He had to put it under the stack before he hurled. The next book was titled, _How To Be a Good, Nurturing Parent_. How many times did he have to stress that it wasn't his kid!?" he put that book under the happy-sappy book only to have _Inu___ Yasha's Guide to Mating sitting on top of the pile staring him in the face. "Ah crap!" he grabbed the book and tossed it into a tree. (An: Inside joke, readers! ^ ^) _

            The next book on the pile was accidentally slipped in. (AN: hoohoohoohoohoo!! ^ ^ ) Inu Yasha stared at the cover title and blushed a little. _The Joy of Sex.___

"Uhhhh…" ;;; he picked it up and slid it in between the happy sappy book and the parental book. The last book was _Chicken Soup for the Tortured Teenage Soul. "Oh yeah, that looks __really interesting." He muttered sarcastically and went off to go find a place he could put them._


	7. Take Note

Hmmm…are my stories not interesting anymore?

No, it's just the fact that I don't update as much as I used to..;;;;

But hey, I'm getting good grades in school! ^__^ 

_Sango__: *sitting Indian style facing away from the readers hovering over a magazine* Oooooh, not bad! Mmmm…._

_Miroku__: *standing a few feet away facing the readers but looking out of the corner of his eyes at Sango.*……….. Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha……. *He takes one baby step toward her, still facing the readers. He takes one huge step, then a small step back and pauses* ….. _

_Sango__: *Not noticing him there* _

_Miroku__: *quick as lightening, snatches the magazine out of her hands and looks at it* Oooh! Playgirl! Are we exploring, Sango? ^ ^ _

_Sango__: Hey! Gimme that! *blushes furiously and tries to snatch it from him* It's not mine! _

_Miroku__: ^__^ You had it! _

_Sango__: *deep red* I found it, I-I was looking inside to see if the owners name was in-_

_Miroku__: Yeah right! Sango's got a dirty magazine! ^___^ HOOHAH!! *starts running with it while Sango chases after him angrily* _

_Sango__: Monk, you've seen too much! *swings her boomerang and misses*_

_Miroku__: *holds magazine up in the air and the fold out falls open* Well apparently, you've seen **everything!! Hahaha!! !**_

~ ~ ~

Chapter 6. Take Note

~ ~ ~ 

            "Come on, Kitty! We gotta go!" Sumiko called from outside Shio's door. 

            "Sumiko, can't we do this some other time?" Shio whined from the somewhere inside. "Like in a few hours, or days, or decades-"

            "No, Kitty! We gotta go now!" Sumiko knocked on his door as she told him this. Naraku sat on her head, picking at her scalp. She finally gave the door a hard knock and shouted, "Kitty if you don't come out, I'm telling elder sister you didn't try to find a mate!" 

            "I _am trying to find a mate!" he said._

            "No you aren't! You're probably joking off!" she said.

            There was a pause of silence before Shio asked, "You mean _jacking off?" _

            "Yeah!"

            "How do _you know what jacking__ off is??!" _

            "Sumiko doesn't know! She just heard Kitty say it before!"

            "Forget I said it, because you're too young and I'm not doing it!" 

            "Come on, Kitty! You're not doing anything!" she whined.

            "No!" he shouted.

            "Don't make Sumiko come in there!" she shouted.

            "I ain't movin'!" And he figured that that was the end of the discussion, but boi was he wrong. 

            Sumiko slid the door open and marched inside. 

            "Hey! I didn't tell you you could come in here!...What?!....What are you-?!-HEY!!"

            Sumiko closed the front door to their house and put a sign on it that said, "Gone to find destiny, be back shortly." 

            "Ready, Shio?" ^__^ 

            "Ready." T_T

            "Ready, Chocolate Monkey Man?" ^___^ 

            "Eee eee!" 

            "Okie then, we're all set!" ^_^ Sumiko leapt off of the porch, landed on one foot and began skipping off toward the west; a sack lunch in her left hand, Naraku perched on her head, and Shio with his arms tied at his sides and his feet tied together sitting on her shoulders were she put him and carried him easily.

            Shio sighed pitifully. "I'm glad Inu Yasha will never know about this." T_T 

-

            "Ooh." Kagome said looking down at herself. "I think it kicked."

            Sango smiled. "I love babies."

            "Really??" Miroku slid over beside her. "I like babies too!" ^__^

            Sango sweatdropped and narrowed her eyes at him.

            "Cool! Can I feel?" Shippou asked.

            "Sure, Shippou-chan!" Kagome smiled down at him.

            He raised his hands up at her from where he was standing. Kagome slowly lowered herself to her knees so that she was at a more accessible level. Shippou went up and put his hands on her stomach and put his ear against it too, as if he would be able to hear the baby too. He heard Kagome's stomach and could defiantly tell there was something moving around in there. Then he felt a swift yet light kick hit just above his ear. He laughed and backed away. 

            Kagome stood back up by herself, even though Sango offered to help. "Come on, you guys! I'm not even that far along!" she laughed a little. 

            "You can never be too careful though." Sango said.

            Miroku nodded in agreement. "That's right Kagome," he stood closer to Sango, she was off guard this time. "With the search for the jewel shards, it will be harder for you and your baby then any other woman, so we must take special precaution." He reached behind Sango.

            O O "HENTAI!!!" 

            _WHACK!! _

            Kagome felt the baby roll over as Miroku reeled back at the force of the slap. 

            "We're trying to prove a point to Kagome! Do you have to pull that crap right now?!" Sango blushed furiously. 

            Meanwhile, on a small knoll of grass surrounded by trees and such, Inu Yasha sat cross legged and spread out his books like playing cards. He looked over the books trying to decide which one he wanted to read. The happy-sappy book, the perverted book that only perverts and whores would read, the book that supposedly he himself wrote, the anger book, the parental book and the stupid teen book. 

            What Kagome must have thought of him for giving him all of these books….;;;

Well, since he was not a pervert, he wouldn't be reading _the Joy of Sex_, he didn't want to read _Inu__ Yasha's Guide to Mating because he didn't feel like getting any unpleasant surprises at the moment (AN: he was stoned when he wrote the book), he wasn't exactly sure how the book got from that tree to back in the pile but…._

The stupid teenage book didn't really interest him at all. He had once heard Kagome say that all of those crappy books were alike…those weren't her exact words of course, that's just how he remembered it…

And that left the happy-sappy book. A sea green, hard-backed book with a very large yellow smiley face on the cover, and the title was printed in large bold lettering at the top. _Wow, you know that author was on meds, he thought to himself. _

He opened the book to the introduction and began reading out loud, "When-I-was-born,-the-doc-tors-thought-I-had-a-tumor,-but-it-turned-out-that-it-was-a-new-form-of-in-fan-cy-de-pres-de-pres-sion, depression-" he struggled with that word… "I-grew-up-with-chron-chron-ic de-depression,-man-ic de-depression,-A-D-D,-sc-sc-hit-tz-zoo-p-her-en-i-a….but-now I'm so happy, it's like I'm high." Inu Yasha blinked and stared at the book in silence. He slowly set it down and slid it away.

"Yeah….next book…" 

He looked over each book again, happy-high book, stupid teenager book, stoned-when-written book and that never-read-in-a-million-years-even-after-achieveing-old-man's-penus-syndrom-(AN: That's when guys get old stop having sex..)-never-read-no-matter-what-art-of-sex-sin book. 

………

His ears twitched and he looked casually to the left then casually to the right….then he shot his hand forward, quick as lightening, grabbed the _Joy of Sex_, turned around, hovered over it, and threw his hair over his face so that it hung in front of him like a curtain so that no one could see what he was doing. 

It was a very interesting book, with very interesting and well detailed pictures….sex with food….sex with experimenting…sex with multiple partners…..positions……

"Hot damn!" Inu Yasha whispered to himself in amazement. "I'll bet that even Shio could learn something from this!" And Shio was like the thighmaster of sex….

His hormonal system became so interested in the book all other senses besides concentration were shut down so he could read and enjoy it to its full advantage. He was in the middle of reading about the gang bang when all of a sudden he felt someone tap him on the shoulder. 

His brain jumped and so did he. He jumped away like it was a demon and turned around sweating and freaked out. Kagome stood there wide eyed, surprised by his strange reaction. Shippou sat on her shoulder and watched him through large innocent eyes. 

"Uh…" Kagome started. "I was wondering if you wanted to feel the baby….but if you're busy…"

"Huh? Oh sure." ;;; he said. He shifted the book in his hand and placed his hand right below her rib cage, which was not the correct place. Kagome looked down at his hand and was about to tell him that he was wrong when she noticed the bulge in his pants. Her eyes widened and she blushed. 

"You dork! It's lower!" Shippou said.

"Shut up, Shippou!" Inu Yasha shouted at him.

"Uh, actually," Kagome grabbed his hand and set it just below her belly button. "You're supposed to feel here."

Inu Yasha blushed deeper then he was before. "T-that's too low isn't it?" 

Kagome shook her head, but it was pretty close to the hem of her skirt and that made her blush deeper. 

So Inu Yasha stood there with his hand glued to her stomach, and he knew he would have to wait till he felt a kick. "I-"-he stuttered "I-d-don't feel anything."

Kagome glanced down at the bulge in his pants again and accidentally said out loud, "Apparently you do." Right after she said that, her whole face went red. 

"Wha?" Inu Yasha looked down at where she was looking and realized what she meant. "Oh crap!" he dropped to his knees and tried to stop it by squeezing his legs together. Just knowing that Kagome had been watching it made him feel like he was going to explode. Well before he could get any worse, he hid the book in his sleeve and hopped off into the trees. 

He stopped to have calm down time in a tree farther away from shoulder taps and other interruptions. Why was Kagome making him feel this way? Not that she wasn't the reason behind many of his past errections, but it was becoming a more noticeable frequent thing…to him at least. Most of the others probably hadn't a clue. Sango was neither a guy, nor did she seem to have much experience in it, so she probably didn't know. Shippou was a stupid kid so there was no way that he knew. There was no way of telling if Miroku knew or not, the perv might have known, but it wasn't like Inu Yasha had told him straight out. God forbid if Kagome knew. If she did, he would have shit twice and died. 

He opened the book again and a folded up rectangle of notebook paper slid into his lap. Inu Yasha picked it up and blinked curiously. The words "Good luck" were written on the front of it in hot pink gel pen. He unfolded it three times to see the whole side of the front page covered with notes in an unknown person's handwriting. It said:

Dear Kagome,

            Here's the book you asked for. I had to pry into the depths of my little brother's dresser drawer to find it. Hope it serves you well as it has served him! ^_^ Just kidding! He's never scored…anyway, good luck, hope you find what you need!

                                                                        -Eki-chan

_Who's Eki-chan?_ Inu Yasha thought. He folded the paper up and realized something he hadn't before. The whole back section of the book was being used as a folder for notes. He turned the page and found the next note, which was only folded once and the top right corner was sort of wrinkled. This one had Kagome's hand writing. She had good spelling. He read the first line which said: "Ideas for Inu Yasha"

            _WHAT?!? _

            Inu Yasha almost fell out of the tree in shock. He sat himself up quickly and held the paper incredibly close to his face. There was no way in hell that he would shrug reading this one off!

Questions to answer: 

1.) What is "doggy style"?

2.) What turns a guy on?

3.) What would be the most fun to try?

-Good foods: chocolate (melted and solid), oreos, fudge….

-See Lubricant

-Some of these positions look like something only a super gymnast can do…

-bear pose…

-Rose spray

-Themes are creative and fun

-….cherries, strawberries, pears....

-Sponges and tissues

-the spread eagle

-Edible undies

-what the heck is tiramisu? 

-the blossoming lilly

-dark shades of lipstick

-leash

-colored undies

-cookies, whipped cream (frozen or refrigerated), icing….

-wow, standing up does look uncomfortable

-frills

-red and/or black lingerie

-Oh my god! THAT'S what "Doggy style" is?!? ;;;;;;;

            Inu Yasha read the note five times then sighed and slouched deeper on the branch. That was what made him realized he was a bit…well….sticky… 

            "Ah crap!" he said out loud. 

-

            Sumiko set Shio down on a hill overlooking a town. Chocolate Monkey Man leapt off of her shoulder and started going through his hair. Shio sweatdropped. "Gross!" T_T He didn't like the idea of a little monkey who used to be an evil half demon genius checking his beautiful hair for small bugs. 

            Sumiko smiled at Naraku as she searched her kimono for something. "Kitty, why did you not take a shower before we look for a mate?"

            "Because you freakn' tied me up before I got a chance too, that's why!" he said looking up at Naraku who parted his hair down the middle. "I take cold showers more often then I change my socks!" 

            "Oh?" Sumiko tilted her head to the side, "Why not warm shower?"

            Shio half facefault. It would have been a full facefault if it weren't for the bondage and the monkey on his head.

            Sumiko pulled a brochure out of the neckline of her kimono and read the cover. "Fu-king....a city known for it's freashwater streams, gun powder riffles...and single women! This is the town for yu, Kitty-chan!" ^_^

            "Stupendous. Now, can you get this monkey off my head before he confuses me for the toilet?" T_T

            "Oh, Kitty-chan, you know Chocolate Monkey Man is potty trained!" Sumiko waved the brochure at him.

            Then they heard a couple of squeaking sounds as Naraku pulled a huge ear wig out of Shio's hair. Shio sweatdropped, horrified, "Was that on me?!" O o ;;;

            Sumiko looked kind of sick herself, "Told ya, you should have showered."

            "Sumiko, if you can find anyone in this time era who can go about their lives without getting insects in their hair, that would be amazing." Shio said as-a-matter-of-factly.

            "Sesshomaru doesn't have bugs." Sumiko said.

            Shio narrowed his eyes and a vein popped on his forehead. "Yes, well, we can't all have hair like Sesshomaru." He glared straight ahead in jealously. "The lucky bastard…"

            Naraku plucked at a piece of his hair hard.

            Shio cringed.

            "Kitty-chan, you is such a whiner." Sumiko stated.

            "I ain't no whiner!" he said and his eye twitched as Naraku pulled at another part of his hair. 

            Sumiko untied his feet and went behind him to untie his wrists. "Sumiko will leave you here for a while, but when she comes back, she doesn't want to hear that you skipped town to look for sake."

            Shio snorted and sweatdropped. "Being bossed around by my own little sister. What a disgrace.."

            Sumiko frowned at him. "Sumiko doesn't understand. She thought Kitty liked women!" 

            "I do like women!" Shio said. "I just don't like being made to like them!" 

            The ropes dropped off of his wrists and he rubbed them. Sumiko could tie a mean square knot.

            "Well drop the rebellious act because getting a mate means full time commitment!" Sumiko said.

            Shio looked over his shoulder at her. "Where did you learn that??" 

            Sumiko held up a green book which read, "Shio's Guide to Sex." And was followed up by a picture of him on the cover. 

            "_Give me that!!" He snatched it from her._

            "Sumiko only read the summary on the back, if Kitty-chan is worried." She said.

            "Honestly. You're going to give me gray hair!" he said and started his walk down to the town.

            Naraku jumped into Sumiko's arms and she waved to him. "Good luck, Kitty-chan! Sumiko will be back in a few hours!" 

-

            Kikyo fell to her knees, breathing as if having an asthma attack. She hadn't seen her soul collecting serpents for days. In fact, she hadn't seen them for the exact amount of days that the demon had been following her. Since then, she had weakened physically and spiritually. It was then that she realized his plan. He was waiting for her to weaken enough to the point where he could kill her easily. She should have killed it when she had the chance. 

            The cold chill she was feeling from the demon blew stronger and more noticeably then before. This was it, it was going to spring out on her when she was at her weakest. As the freezing winds began to pick up, she heard a voice as if it were right next to her, whispering in her ear. "Having problems, are we priestess?"

            (AN: Imagine the voice of Kenshin from Ruroni Kenshin. That's what the voice sounds like.)

            Kikyo gasped for breath and choked, "Stay back demon if you know what's good for you."

            "Should I now?" the voice asked in slight amusement. "Why should I stay back then? Why is it good for me?"

            "I am Kikyo." She said, as if this was enough to send him running. 

            "Kikyo?" he said. "What a pretty name. Kikyo is a type of flower is it not? I'm not used to seeing flowers, so I wouldn't know."

            What was this, a personal chat or threat on her life?

            "If you wish me to die, I cannot allow it, my arrow shall fly before you're claws are even raised!" she said, though she wasn't exactly sure she could raise her bow even at the moment.

            "Claws? How do you know if I have claws? Maybe I have wings, or flippers-"

            "Are you going to try to kill me or not?" Kikyo finally asked. This conversation was petty from the start. 

            There was a pause before the voice said, "No. I'm not going to try to kill you."

            Kikyo stooped forward even more, facing the ground. She couldn't raise her head. "What do you want from me?" she asked. 

            No answer came, but after a few moments, there came the soft crunching of footsteps across the grass. She groaned and a bead of sweat dripped off of her forehead and onto the dirt. "I mean it!" she found the strength to pick up her bow and swing it in some random direction as if to hit him. But not only could she not see him, but he was doing even better at hiding his demon aura. She grunted and swung the bow again, but someone caught it and ripped it out of her hand. She fell on her side, propping herself up with her elbow. She felt a cold hand placing itself on her shoulder and lightly laying her on her back in the middle of the path. She looked upward but the person was only a blur to her decreasing vision. She strained to see him until a hand was lain on her forehead while the other one held the pulse on her list. "Be still." He said. 

            All of a sudden, a cool icy feeling of magic began to fill her insides. Within moments, her strength grew and her composure returned to normal. As her vision returned, she could see him. He was a demon taking the form of a human man. About the age of 18. He was dressed in whites, blues, and a few blacks and silvers. He didn't have any claws. But his skin was very pale. His hair was black, and he didn't wear it up as most human men did, and his eyes were bright blue. He gave her a cold and expressionless gaze.

            _I don't believe it! Kikyo thought, looking at him in amazement. _This demon possesses the power of light!__


	8. Yukidaruma, Shio’s Promise, and Kagome’s...

Well, today was my first day of driver's ed. I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar! = O.o ???

Baby in a topless bar: I'm so confused!!! 

And I do not own Inu Yasha, but I do own Shio, Sumiko, Sashimi and a bunch of other OCs that simply scream out for their own show. ^_~ Cha-ching! 

Another thing, I was asked a question about what this "Light" thing is. I know it's kinda vague. Light is pretty much everything that is good and is one of the most powerful things in the universe. It has as many uses as the shikon jewel but the most common use for it is in life and healing powers.

Confused? Good! ^_^

Chapter 7. Yukidaruma, Shio's Promise, and Kagome's Uterine Wall

            Sumiko skipped down toward the town humming a little tune to herself. Shio had to have found a solid mate by now, it was a sure thing! With his tender heart and alluring beauty, any girl would be lucky to have him! ^__^ She sniffed around for the direction he was but a loud giggly cry to her right gave his location away. She tiptoed over to the bushes and peeked through the leaves. 

            Well she found Shio. He was sitting on a tree stump grinning like a kitty in a field of catnip. Did he find his future mate? If by future mate you mean several women holding their dresses up to their knees, giggling as one of them tied a blindfold over his eyes, then yes, he did. She quickly tied it on and sprinted away with the other girls. They began to back away as he stood up. He warmed up by taking a couple of steps and moving his head from side to side still grinning. 

            "I think we should have gotten something to cover his nose too!" One of them laughed. 

            "That's right!" Shio said. "Who needs eyesight when you have a doggy nose, demon hearing and a radar for fine women?" he tilted his head forward a bit and the girls all giggled excitedly. 

            "Don't worry!" one of them said waving to a couple of the others. "He can't catch us!" ^__^ 

            "I can catch you and I will." Shio said, leaning on one leg with a hand on his hip and his head tilted back. "And when I do, I'll give you all a real reason to giggle sensually for." 

            The girls answered this statement with high pitched squeals of pleasure at the idea. 

            "Ready?" he asked. He dropped down on four feet and smiled like a hungry lion. 

The girls got ready to bolt. At the same time, they shouted, "GO!" 

Shio sprang and the girls scattered like gazelles. He went after the closest couple of girls which happened to be the slowest. They tried to throw him off with zigzags, but he was too cunning. Of course, he wasn't going his real speed. If he was, the game would have already ended and there would be no more virgins. 

Sumiko made a horse sound with her mouth and went out into the little field. 

"I'm gonna catch you!" he sang. 

The girls he was chasing screamed and crossed paths with another group of girls and he caught their scent. "Whoop! There's Ami! Got take her down first!" 

Ami screamed with laughter and tried to catch up to her twin sister.

"Oh yeah, baby! Ami and Hina! This will be a good first catch!" he laughed evilly.

Sumiko stood in the middle of the field with her hands behind her back. The laughing girls and Shio ran by her and she watched them calmly. A few seconds later they made a U turn and Sumiko turned around to face the direction they were coming from. She watched Ami and Hina run by. Sumiko looked disappointedly at her foolish older brother coming toward her. She sighed sadly and stuck out her foot. 

As expected, Shio tripped, screamed like a little girl, and fell over on his arm. The girls gasped and stopped running. Sumiko shook her head as he tried to recover his fall gracefully. He jumped to his feet with his ponytail hanging in his face. He raised his arms and said, "I'm okay!" he blew the ponytail aside, and lifted up one corner of the blindfold to see Sumiko giving him an expression that made her look like a worried mother. 

            Shio bit his bottom lip, and looked off to the side. "You know what, I know – just what you are going to say!" he pointed at her with both index fingers and looked to the side fishing for a good explanation. "You see, this is part of how I was planning to find a mate, yeah, I get to know them by-"

            "Kitty?" Sumiko interrupted. He stopped talking and looked down at her. She gave him a serious expression, which she did not usually make. "Kitty didn't look for a mate at all this afternoon, did he?" 

            "Well-" he started nervously. 

            Sumiko motioned for him to bend closer and down to her level. He did so and she grabbed his ear. 

            "Hey!" 

            She began to drag him away from the confused girls. "Kitty, Sumiko has to talk with you." She set Naraku down first. "Wait here CMM, Sumiko will be back momentarily."

            Naraku watched the two of them disappear behind the bushes. He then sighed, sat down, and scratched his back. 

            "_Kawaii_!" one of the girls shrieked.

            Naraku froze mid scratch and his eyes grew. OO ;;;

            All of the girls were standing around him. "Look at that cute little monkey!!" 

            Sumiko let go of his ear and he rubbed it trying to massage her fingerprints out of it. He pouted a bit and said, "You know, I really don't understand why you and Sashimi want me to get a mate so bad. I mean, I'm happy the way I am! I have a wide selection of females. I don't feel tied down or caged in, why can't I just live the way I want to?"

            Sumiko looked up at him dead serious. "Because if you keep living the way you do, you're going to end up crying."  

            Shio looked taken aback and confused. "What?" He knew that most of the time, she spoke in riddles, and though he was getting used to it, she still surprised him with statements he couldn't interpret. 

            Sumiko sat down and that meant that he had to sit down too. "Kitty," she said in a sympathetic, caring voice. She reached out and held one of his hands that was much bigger then hers. She held his hand and she patted it showing her concern. "There's a saying…What comes up, must come down. Wouldn't Kitty rather have someone to come down with?" 

            Shio raised an eyebrow. Sumiko sighed, and reminded herself that everybody needs a pretty boy. "Remember Fonzie?" 

            Shio sweatdropped. "You mean that retarded dick from happy days who snapped his fingers a lot?"

            "Uh-huh." Sumiko nodded. "Does Kitty know what happened to him?" 

            "Well," Shio looked upward trying to remember but the only thing that came to his mind was _"Sunday, Monday, Happy Days-!"_

            "Don't know." Shio shrugged. "I heard he moved to Australia to train gymnastics to wombats and koalas."

            "His show was canceled. Cause all of the characters grew up!" Sumiko said. "Kitty, what if you were old like Fonzie? Would you want to be a really old guy still hitting on chickens?"

            "Chicks!" he corrected her with several sweatdrops.

            "Whatever, Kitty! Doesn't kitty want to grow old with someone? Doesn't Kitty want true love? Doesn't Kitty want to give Sumiko a niece to play with?!" 

            "A what?!" He was getting it just fine till the last sentence. 

            "Come on, Kitty!! Sumiko wants little dog eared nieces!!" Sumiko cried.

            "Whatever! I'll concentrate more on finding a mate okay? Just don't push me around." Shio said folding his arms.

"Kitty promises?" 

"Kitty promises."  
            "Okay!" Sumiko smiled like her old Mihoshi self and looked back at the field. "Before we go, we should save Chocolate Monkey Man from the weird giggly girls." 

            "Fine." Shio nodded. 

-

            From tallest to shortest, Miroku, Inu Yasha, Sango, and Shippou stood in a line with their stomachs in, feet together and shoulders back. Kagome paced in front of them looking mighty unhappy. They watched her out of the corner of their eyes as she walked back in forth, not saying anything. Finally Miroku leaned toward Inu Yasha and asked, "What's going on?"

            "Ten hut!" Kagome shouted. 

            Miroku straightened up and she turned to frown at all of them. "A very important book is missing from my bag and I want to know right now who took it!" she said. 

            "Which book?" Shippou asked.

            "It doesn't matter which book, I just know that it's gone. It didn't fly out of my bag I want to know who has it!" She blushed a little bit as she said it. In fact, she didn't want them all to know that she had the _Joy of Sex and all of those notes and pictures stuck between pages. "If whoever has it tells me right now, I will not cause them any permanent injuries. Spare yourself now and confess!" _

            No one said anything, no one moved.

            "Fine then." Kagome said. She began to pace again looking at each person as if they were the guilty one. Then she stopped in front of Miroku and pointed at him. "Where were you between the hours of six and seven p.m.!" 

            "Wha?! Uh-I dunno, Lady Kago-"

            "AHA!! You were out stealing my book so that you could look through it and copy things down and take pictures with your secret spy camera!!" 

            "My secret what??" 

            "Don't play dumb with me!!" Kagome jumped on his chest and while he was still standing, grabbed his collar and pointed at him. "You have my book don't you!!! Confess before I devour your perverted soul!!" 

            Everyone sweatdropped.

            Miroku looked at where she was sitting then smiled and put his hands on her hips. "My, Lady Kagome, are we being frisky?"

            WHACK!! 

            Double whammy. Kagome slapped him as Sango bonked him. 

            Shippou and Inu Yasha looked on with sweatdrops. 

            "I will find out who has my book!" Kagome said folding her arms. Her backround became filled with light and she stood with her fist clentched in a determined stance. "I will not rest until it is found!!" Then all of a sudden she doubled over and moaned in pain. "Ugh!! My stomach!"

            "Kagome?!" Inu Yasha said. He and the others ran over to her. 

Shippou held her shoulder. "Are you okay, Kagome?"

"Gah!" her face looked pale. "I think that adrenaline just made me queasy…guhhh!" ;;;; 

"Why don't you sit down, try not to force yourself." Miroku said. He and Sango where about to help her to her feet but Inu Yasha got there first. He put an arm behind her back and held her forearm in his other hand and helped her over to the tree he usually sat in front of or in. "Careful." He said as she slowly lowered to a sitting position.

Miroku, Sango and Shippou watched interestedly. 

Inu Yasha still held her as if she were very fragile and very precious. "You okay?" 

She looked up at him and nodded. "Yeah. Thank you, Inu Yasha." She gave a slight smile and tilted her head to the side. "That was really nice of you."

He blinked and wondered how he had been so instinctive with that. At the time it felt like something he was supposed to do, but now that he thought about it, he realized that that would only make her cling tighter to the thought that he was the father – which he wasn't. 

He quickly straightened up and went to go sit cross-legged in a different spot. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes again he jumped in shock as Miroku, Sango and Shippou were all sitting around him grinning. "What??" 

"That was pretty nice of you Inu Yasha," Sango said in amusement. 

"Yeah, you looked like you knew what you were doing, too." Shippou grinned up at him. 

"Wha? Baka!" he looked at his lap frowning with a sweatdrop. "You people think too much. If I didn't help her sit down she was going to complain and get all weird and touchy about me not doing anything for her. She's the one who thinks its my pup but it's not, I don't know where she got that crap-"

"Whatever, Inu Yasha." Shippou smiled and scampered over to Kagome to try and make her laugh and ask her a bunch of questions again. 

Miroku and Sango went over to sit and watch. Inu Yasha waited till no one was paying attention and jumped off looking for a good place to read the book again. Most of the trees had lost their leaves so he couldn't hide in them anymore. He sat behind a tree far away and pulled Kagome's missing book out of his kimonos. He flipped it open to the page to the next group of notes she had written. It had become so that he looked forward to her dirty notes then the book itself. If she made an inside reference to the book then he would go to the page it talked about and read why she thought what she thought about it. 

And then there were the pictures. Kagome was a better drawer then he was that's all he could say. They weren't perfect, a little more chibbi looking then real life things but they were still good. One of the pictures of the men in the book had dog ears drawn on them. It was the one doing a "doggy style". He laughed a little at that. A guy with a sixties haircut and she gave him Inu Yasha's dog ears. She had various sketches of what she thought his anatomy looked like and she either put him in a sexy suggestive pose or an artistic mysterious pose. Then she drew pictures of him and her in various positions wearing various styles of clothes or no clothes at all. He really liked these pictures. Once he saw something really hard to do and he actually tried to bend himself like that in real life. Surprisingly he could. 

"I bet Inu Yasha would like that doggy style." She wrote in one note. "I can just imagine it too. I think that would be fun for me too." And under that was a little drawling of him and her doing the doggy style. He whimpered a little bit at this. The chibbi drawling of himself was lucky. He rubbed his thumb against the chibbi Kagome drawing's arched back and said outloud, "I wanna play too." Then he blushed when he realized what he said. Well after that, he knew he couldn't tell himself that he didn't like her like that. Kagome having his pups did sound good. But it couldn't happen. He still owed Kikyo his life, whether he was her soul mate or not, she died for him and was the cause of most of her problems. And the thought of being the father was too farfetched for him to believe. It couldn't be possible – it couldn't! He just hopped to god that it wasn't Kouga's…

At camp Sango was the one making lunch this time. "Maybe we should start thinking of names for the baby."

"What?" Kagome looked up at her. "But we don't even know what it's going to be yet."

"Well what you do is you pick a couple of boys names that you like and a couple of girls names so that when the time comes, you'll have an idea of what you want!" Sango smiled and stirred the rice. Rice was one of the few foods she did know how to cook. 

"Also you should think about preparing for the birth." Miroku said sitting in front of Kagome. "Planning the baptism, building up muscle in your abdomen, you also have to eat for both you and the baby now. That means extra rice for Kagome, right Sango?"

"Correct, Houshi." Sango said, not bothering to glance at him. 

"You also have to know the correct way to breath." Miroku stated holding up a finger.

"The right way to breath? Oh yeah! I know what you're talking about." She said. "I should probably go to my time to learn about that."

"We have our own methods here but your time might be more advanced in that field." He said folding his arms. 

Shippou was busy pressing his ear against Kagome's stomach trying to feel a kick again. "I can hear the ocean!" He said in awe. 

-

            Finally, Kikyo made it out of the mountains. But she wasn't alone, walking fourteen feet behind her was that ice demon who healed her somehow. He had been very quiet the past few days of following her. The only thing he had really done was put a creepy feeling on the back of Kikyo's neck. She usually felt it when she got around demons with strong auras. "Still there?" she asked, not looking back at him.

            "Still here." He replied.

            "Do you want something from me?" she asked.

            "I want something from you." He replied.

            "What do you want?" she asked.

            "I want to help you." He said.

            Well this was strange. The only demon who ever wanted to help her was the poor and pathetic Inu Yasha. "I don't need help." She said.

            "Yes you do." He said.

            "Why do you think I need help?" she asked him. "If I wanted to, I could turn around and purify you right now."

            There was a pause of silence before he replied, "And if I wanted too, I could drain the life out of you before you could draw an arrow." 

            Kikyo didn't find this threatening. She mearly chuckled and said. "Life. What makes you think I have life in me?" 

            "You have souls in you. That's a form of undead life." He said.

            "Is there a point to you?" she asked.

            "Everything has a point." He stated. Another vague comment. 

            "If everything does have a point, then what is yours?" she asked.

            "I have many points, but you have only a few to worry about." He stated. "One of my points is, you won't live long unless you find your soul collectors again."

            Kikyo stopped where she stood and turned to look at him warily. "Try not to be vague, and tell me what you mean."

            He smiled a bit, knowing that he finally had her true attention. "It's simple really." He came walking toward her. "With your design, you need souls to survive. You can't live on light for long, the dead clings to death as the living clings to life. Your body will eat up the light soon and you'll be similar to a life-size poppet." 

            Kikyo swallowed. If there was one thing that she wanted, it was to live. And at the moment, this guy seemed like her only source of aid. "And how can you help me, demon?"

            He came toward her and circled her a couple of times. "I can help you get your shikigami back, plus all the souls you will probably ever need." 

            This sounded good, but there wasn't a doubt in Kikyo's mind that there wasn't a price tag on this so called help. "And what do you want in return, demon?"

            "Well for one, you can stop calling me demon." He said stopped circling and stood facing her. "My name is Yukidaruma, I am an ice dragon and I study light." 

            Kikyo narrowed her eyes at him.

            "Besides," he said. "I will come to you when it is the right time. Then you will know what I want in return." His eyes flashed. "Will you let me help you?"

            Kikyo glared at him, maybe if she stared long enough he would burst into flames or drop his mysterious veal and show his true nature. A shady character like this Yukidaruma guy was hard to figure out. If he was telling the truth, she would never have to worry about her shikigami or how far they would have to go to find souls for her. But she really didn't know what he wanted. For all she knew, he could have been asking her to sell her freedom to him. From deep inside of herself, she could feel the light he gave her was beginning to slowly dissolve already. "Fine then, you may help me. But keep your demonic games to yourself, I'm on a mission."

            "Life is the greatest mission of all, but death is the greatest adventure." He gave a vague comment. 

            Kikyo gave him a raised eyebrow before turning around. "What are you? Some sort of Zen master?"

            Yukidaruma smirked and hid his hands inside of his kimono sleeves as he followed her. "Something like that."

-

            "Hey kitty, what time is it?" Sumiko asked walking with her hands behind her head. They walked down a path overlooking a small rice field. 

            He looked at his wrist which didn't have a watch on it and said, "Time to get a new watch….which was not invented till the 1800s by some creepy German guy."

            "Oh." Sumiko said. After a few moments she glanced at him and asked, "How did Kitty know that?"

            Shio sighed and said, "Being the strange OC that I am, the writer beams random futuristic information into my head frequently."

            "Aka Shio!" 

            Shio and Sumiko froze mid step and looked over there shoulders. "Hum?" 

            A man with a raven topknot and expensive clothes reared his horse as he came up the path and stopped thirty feet from them. His small army fallowed close behind him. The man didn't look pleased. "Stop right there, devil!" he shouted.

            "Problem?" Shio asked calmly.

            "I've come to avenge my sister!" he drew his sword and charged Shio and Sumiko as his men drew their swords and ropes. 

            Well the Inu Yasha group was just strolling along when all of a sudden, Kagome stopped in her tracks and looked down at the ground. It took everyone a few seconds to realize she had stopped walking. "What is it, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked looking back at her. 

            "I sense a large piece of the shikon jewel, it feels like at least a fourth of the ball!" she said surprised.

            "That's amazing!" Shippou said.

            "How were you able to determine the size of it from here?" Inu Yasha asked.

            "I'm not sure. Maybe it's because of the baby." She said. 

            Miroku smiled. "Mother powers, how sweet."

            Kagome grinned then gasped as Inu Yasha lifted her onto his back.

            "Let's go, Kago-!"

            "YOU JERK!!" 

            WHACK!!

            Inu Yasha dropped her onto her feet and clutched the lump on his head. "OW!! What was that for?!?" 

            "Baka! I can't ride on your back in this condition!" she shouted. "Do you want me to dislocate the fetus from my uterine wall?!!" 

            "Dislocate the what from the what??" he had become so confused by what she had said it freaked him out.  

            "Whatever! Just go on ahead, I'll catch up." She pointed in the direction of the shikon shards and he leapt off in that direction. Followed by Sango and Miroku. 

            "Soul Shattering Iron Claw!!" Shio sliced three swords in half with only his claws. The three men they once belonged too, looked at the bare handles then ran off in fear. Then their ringleader came at him again with his sword. Shio drew his double bladed sword in a flash of white light and blocked each blow. 

            Naraku bounced up onto one of the samurai's faces, hissing and screeching, trying to tear out his eyes. The man flailed and screamed bloody murder. Sumiko was surrounded by three men who were closing in on her. She counted each of them then reached into her kimono and drew the playing card, the three of diamonds. In a poof of foxfire, two other Sumiko's appeared facing each enclosing man. They all crossed their wrists and the palms of their hands went blood red. At the same time they all charged and shouted, "Crimson Light Claw!" 

            Shio watched the guy as he blocked facile swings then his face lit up when he realized how he knew him. "Oh yeah! You're that short guy who's sister I banged six years ago! You're acne has cleared up since then." He smirked at him as the man's face grew bright red with rage. "I'll kill you for touching her!!" Shio smacked his sword out of his hand. The man watched it fly through the air and stick blade down into the ground thirty feet away. Then he looked at Shio nervously. Shio sheathed his sword and crossed his wrists. "Time for the grand finale!" he said positioning his hands correctly for his own special attack. He knew the soul shattering iron claw, but that also belonged to Inu Yasha. It was time to show what Shio himself was known for. Streaks of light that wavered like glowing water flowed in ringlets in the spaces between his fingers. 

            "Shio!"

            His eyes widened and his ears twitched, then Inu Yasha flew right into him knocking him several feet away. The man he was fighting sweatdropped.

            Shio and Inu Yasha lay on the ground smiling with swirly eyes. 

            "H~e~y~I~n~u~Y~a~s~h~a~!~W~h~a~t~'s~u~p?" @_@ Shio asked in a dazed voice. 


	9. The FoxFather

Fall break….yes….Fall break is a good thing…..and I get five whole days of it….yes…..

One thing I would like to ask of you is not to flame me at the moment. If you have a problem, try to put it as nicely as possible without lying. I think it's called tact…anyway, I'm not feeling very good emotionally at the moment, so if you could keep the bad comments down….like from the Ghoul King….that person has told me how bad some of my stories are…..like I need to be reminded of my incompetence T_T …..

I mean for godsakes people! The village psychopath has feelings too! _

Chapter 8. The FoxFather

            His eyes widened and his ears twitched, then Inu Yasha flew right into him knocking him several feet away. The man he was fighting sweatdropped.

            Shio and Inu Yasha lay on the ground smiling with swirly eyes. 

            "H~e~y~I~n~u~Y~a~s~h~a~!~W~h~a~t~'s~u~p?" @_@ Shio asked in a dazed voice. 

            Sango and Miroku came running in just as the prince and his men realized they were no match for Shio and his friends. So of course, they ran away with their tails between their legs just like puppies – except the men were on horses. 

            Naraku jumped into Sumiko's arms and she noticed that the cavalry had arrived. "Hi Monkey! Hi San-goo!" Sumiko smiled and waved her hand violently. 

            "Hi, Sumiko!" they sprinted past her to go help their doggy friends. 

            "Where's that nice skirt lady?" Sumiko asked.

            They didn't hear her so she hopped off in the direction they came from. And sure enough, Kagome was pushing her bike with Shippou in the basket. They were so sadly behind the group. "Hi nice lady!" Sumiko sprinted over to her while holding Naraku. 

            Kagome was surprised to see her here. "Sumiko-chan?"

            Sumiko stopped herself before she ran into her, grinned brightly and looked at her stomach. "Hey you've got a throw pillow under you clothes!" 

            Kagome sweatdropped and laughed nervously.

            "It's a baby, Sumiko!" Shippou said. 

            Sumiko squinted at Kagome's stomach then nodded. "Yeah, I see it's light!" She went closer to Kagome, hugged her around the waist and put her ear against her stomach. "Hello! My name is Aka Sumiko! What is yours?" 

            Kagome grinned and laughed a little. The fox puppy girl was so adorable. ^____^ 

            Sumiko nodded again then after a few seconds said, "That's a nice name! Reminds me of someone Sumiko knows!" ^_^ 

            "Huh?" Shippou and Kagome blinked at her. 

            Suddenly Sumiko laughed and said, "Your funny! ^__^ Yeah, Sumiko likes cookies too!" 

            "Sumiko?" Kagome asked more then a little confused. "What are you doing?"

            Sumiko smiled up at her and replied casually. "I'm talkn' with the baby, it's fun!" ^_^ 

            Kagome looked at her shocked her grin faded. "You're kidding right?"

            Sumiko shook her head then made a sound of awe, "Really? Do tell!" 

            "That's amazing!" Shippou said.

            "What's the baby saying now??" Kagome asked.

            Sumiko listened for a few moments before saying, "The baby wants to know why it's taking so long to get to the battlefield? The baby says 'how does she expect to keep up with everyone when she can't even get to the battle scene before it ends?'"

            "Well I'm trying!" Kagome said. 

            Sango came over looking mighty disturbed. "Trust me, you're so lucky you weren't there." ;;;

            Kagome didn't even have to ask her why. The reason came walking right toward them. Miroku, Shio, and Inu Yasha; all laughing and singing, "_Ohhh__, You gonna to take me home tonight! Ohhh, right beside that red firelight! Ohhh, you gonna to let it all hang out! Fat bottomed girls you make the rockn' world go round!" _

            Sango sighed loudly behind Kagome. "We should start running – now." She grumbled. 

            Then from amongst their fun and laughter, Shio noticed a slight difference in Kagome's appearance. "Well he-hellooo!" he pulled his head back a bit and looked at her excitedly. He moved away from Inu and Miroku to go circle and look her up and down a couple times. He bent down to get a closer view of her stomach. Kagome sweatdropped. 

            Shio stood up again with his hands on his hips. "My god!" he said. He looked at Inu Yasha in near hysteric incredulity. He pointed at her stomach. "Is that thing real??" 

            Inu Yasha sweatdropped then looked off to the side clearing his throat. "It's not mine."

            Shio's jaw dropped. "No way! Kagome's not like that!" 

            "You're right, I'm not like that." Kagome said. She looked off to the side also looking upset. Shio looked back and forth from Inu to Kagome. "Uhhh…" ;;;;

            Sumiko came over holding Naraku and looked up at him. Shio put a hand on her shoulder, bent down and whispered to her. "Sumiko, I think we missed something while we were away."

            Sumiko shrugged. She lifted Naraku up by his underarms and played helicopter with him. Naraku blushed and growled. 

            "By the way, Shio," Kagome went up to him with her hands together.

            He smiled brightly down at her. "Yes, Precious?" 

            She sweatdropped, "Well, I really need your help with something."

            "Wait!" Sango came over and stood next to Kagome. "Though I hate to admit it, I need your help too." 

            "Likewise!" Miroku stood behind them and rubbed both of their bottoms at the same time. 

            WHACK!!!

            Shippou jumped onto Shio's shoulder. "Are we going to train some more?"

            Inu Yasha folded his arms and 'feh'ed. Which meant that he also needed help. 

            Shio sweatdropped and looked at everybody freaked out. "What am I?! The frickn' Wizard of Oz?!"

-

            Inu Yasha, Shippou, Kagome, Sango, Miroku. In that order, each person sat on a log rotting log in front of a small hut in the forest. 

            Miroku looked down the line and asked. "What's going on?"

            No one answered him of course. Like they had been told at all what those two kitsune were scheming inside the hut. Kagome pulled a digital clock out of her pocket and looked at it. 

            "Tss," Inu Yasha sat with his arms folded. "This is lame ass."

            All of a sudden, the mat that hung in front of the door to the shed stirred and Sumiko stepped out. Everyone sweatdropped. 

            Sumiko was wearing an Italian Armani Suit and tie. She kept her eyes closed with a serious expression across her face. She kept her hands in her pocket. She stood there for a long time not moving, not speaking, Kagome wasn't even sure if she was breathing. 

            Everyone: ……………..

            Then finally, Naraku came out of the shed, grunting and groaning as he pushed a sterio that was twice his size.

            "Hey! That's mine!" Kagome said.

            It took him several minutes to get the sterio five feet from the shed. He fell against it panting then reached up and pushed the play button. The backround music from the movie the godfather began to drift through the air. Sumiko opened her eyes and said, "Thank you for coming, shikon group, the foxfather has agreed to see you, but not all at once. I will come get you one at a time. And since Shippou here is the youngest as well as a kitsune himself, the foxfather has omitted him to be the first to see him. 

            "What!?" Inu Yasha said.

            "Just because he's a fox??" Sango said. 

            "Tut tut, I did not ask for your comments. Now if you would be so kind as to wait patiently, you will all have your turn." Sumiko said. She waved her fingers toward her as a signal for Shippou to come over.

            "Yes!" Shippou hopped off the log and went inside with Sumiko. 

            Everyone sat staring at the hut while Naraku was still trying to catch his breath and the music rolled on continuously. 

            "How long do we have to listen to this music?" Miroku asked.

            The inside of the hut was dimly lit with a few fox fire candles. Shio sat in front of a floor table. He was also wearing an Armani suit. Kirara sat in his lap purring as he stroked her fur. Sumiko led Shippou to a pillow that was in front of the table. 

            "Please sit, young Meat." Shio said, Mimicking the godfather's voice. 

            Shippou sat down and looked up at Shio in awe. 

            "Tell me now," Shio said. "What is it, that you need from the FoxFather?"

            Shippou swallowed and said, "Well Foxfather, I was wondering if you were going to give me any lessons on fighting while you were here. Also, I'd really really like for you to make Inu Yasha be the father of Kagome's baby. He's being such a stubborn mule! – Mr. FoxFather."

            Shio smiled briefly then coughed and said, "Well, Meat. As for the lessons that you so humbly request from me, there is a lot of reorganizing involved. You see the FoxFather has quite a busy schedule….not to mention the time he must give to his next few patients.  But I will promise you this." He gave a wave of his hand. "Whether it's six hours to six minutes, the FoxFather will give you at least one lesson while he is here visiting his friends."

            Shippou smiled brightly. "Wow! Thanks Shi-I mean FoxFather!" 

            "You're welcome." Shio said. "You may go now."

            Shippou went outside and threw his fists into the air. "YES!"

            "What happened??" Sango asked.

            "I'm gonna get lessons!" Shippou said. He did a backflip and hopped over to his seat on the log. 

            Sumiko came out of the hut. "Inu Yasha, Shio would see you next, if he weren't such a gentlemen. He says ladies first, and the first of the ladies will be Kagome – because she asked first. 

            Kagome stood up and followed Sumiko inside. Shio gave her an evil smile as soon as she walked in. Kagome rolled her eyes and sat on the pillow Sumiko offered her. 

            "Well Kagome, my child, what is it that you need from the FoxFather?" he winked at her. 

            She gave him a harassed look before saying, "Please Shio, I can't tell you what I need unless you act serious."

            "Okay," he said. Kirara jumped out of his lap. He shooed Sumiko and the demon kitty out of the hut. He took a deep breath, leaned over the table toward her, resting his chin on his hands, looked at her cutely and asked in a soothing voice. "What's bothering you?"

            Kagome blushed a bit. "Well, remember when Inu Yasha and I….when we-um…."

            "Made love like sea otters?" Shio suggested.

            Kagome's whole face turned red and she looked horrified.

            "Yes, I remember," Shio said. "Continue please."

            She looked to the side, and appeared so uncomfortable that she couldn't even handle speaking.

            Shio sighed. "Okay, hold on," he got up on the table causing her to look ever more frightened. He turned her around and pressed a spot on her back. All of a sudden, her fear and embarrassment began to disappear. Her mind cleared, she felt like she had just been hit with three CC's of morphine. She slouched a little bit as Shio began to massage her back and turn her suffering into relaxation. "Theeere we goooo…" He said is a slow soothing voice. He put his head beside hers and asked, "Better now?" 

            She nodded drowsily. If he kept it up, she might've fallen asleep. 

            "You can trust Shio, he won't laugh, he won't tell on you, he's only here to help. He will help you with whatever you need." He said. 

            She nodded, starring out into space.

            "Please continue." He said again. 

            "Well, after that night," she said. "I didn't get my period for a while." She felt so comfortable, she felt like she could tell him anything. "I felt sick most of the time, mostly cramps and seasickness on land. There were the certain signs that told me to take a pregnancy test."

            "Mmmmhmmm," Shio nodded.

            "So I took it, and it said I was pregnant. And it was right, because now it's growing bigger….so I'm growing bigger. But before that, I was afraid to tell Inu Yasha, I didn't know what he would have said."

            "He was your first was he?" Shio asked.

            "That was my first, last, and only time ever." She said. "And my mom thought he would be a good dad. She said she trusted him, I trusted him, but I also knew he was stubborn. And in the past, he's never let me down, but not now…" A tear slid off of her cheek. She wasn't choked up, because of the massage, but having to retell the story was hard enough for her to become miserable inside. "He won't be the father. He says it isn't his. Then he starts getting mad at me, because he thinks I cheated on him! After all of those times when I caught him with Kikyo, and I've never ever gone off behind his back to go kiss some other guy." Two more tears fell. 

            Shio looked at her sympathetically and moved up to her shoulders. "I feel your pain."

            "Which leads to my question," she reached up and grabbed his hands on her shoulders. He looked shocked that she could still move during one of his massages, but was even more shocked at what she did next. 

            Kagome turned around and looked up at him with large watery eyes filled with emotion. "I want you to be the father!"

            Wow. Shio looked just like one of the girls whom Miroku asked to bear his child. "Humma?" he asked in a funny voice. 

            "If you can just make Inu Yasha jealous or help me through what I'm doing! I can't do this by myself! I'm too young! I don't know what I'm doing!! " tears started to go down her cheeks in small streams. He looked at her sadly then opened his arms a little to let her hug him. She threw her arms around him and buried her tears in his chest. 

            "I'm really sorry." He said. He hugged her back, but it wasn't perverted or anything. It was a "friends" hug. Then after a few moments he said something that made her heart freeze up, "But I can't."

            She was so shocked, she stopped crying, but she hiccupped loudly. "What?" she gasped. He pulled her away. "I know very little about raising a child, but I can take care of a woman in labor." He squeezed her arms a little in display or affection. Shio looked over her shocked expression before adding, "Besides that, I'm bound by the best friends code."

            "What?" Kagome looked like she was welling with several different emotions at once and couldn't decide which one to pick. 

            "If you had picked any other guy to do this for you, Inu Yasha would be heartbroken. But if I, Inu Yasha's best friend in the whole wide world, the guy he's known since before he could have a boner, were to start pretending he was the father of his girlfriends baby….damn…" Shio said looking at the wall, as if he could see through it. "That would crush his spirit altogether."

            Kagome let go of Shio and looked at the ground. "He doesn't care." She hissed.

            "I bet my brusquest he does!" Shio said. That sentence might have sounded weird and/or suggestive to Kagome, if her mind was calm enough to fall into the gutter. 

            "He freaked out at the thought of you being with another guy, didn't he?" Shio asked. "He cares, he's just a melon head, which I'm sure you already know."

            Kagome nodded.

            "I'll try to convince him, in the meantime, I suggest you get ready for that baby." Shio said, going back to sit in his chair. "Whether I can convince him or not, he'll believe when a dogearred baby pops out!" 

            Kagome couldn't help but laugh at that comment. 

            Shio gave her a final smile before giving her a tissue and shooing her out of the shed. Shio dawned the Italian look once more and sent Sumiko to get the next one. 

            Sango came into the hut looking suspicious. "Why was Kagome crying?"           

            "Personal problems." Shio said in the old guy, Italian accent. "Please sit down, Miss Babe." 

            Sango sat down on the pillow, then her eyes fell upon Kirara, who was in Shio's lap. "Hey! Kirara!" 

            The kitten looked from Sango, her master, to the expert in cat back massages Shio and sweatdropped. She gave Sango a torn mew.

            "Fine…sit in his lap." ;;;; she said. 

            Kirara mewed happily and Shio continued to stroke her back. 

            "Miss Sango," he started. "You rarely come within seventeen feet of me, let alone ask me for advice. Hopes for me are high that this time I will have the chance to prove my innocence to you-"

            "No! I will not have sex with you!" she shouted. 

            "I did not ask that, but I was probably going to!" he pointed at her and winked.             

            Ten minutes later….

            "Oh my god…" Sango moaned. 

            Readers get your mind out of the gutter. What was happening was Shio was again sitting on his desk, giving Sango a back massage. "So Sango, what is it that you need?"

            "Lessons." 

            "Lessons?" he asked. "Fighting lessons?"

            "No." she said. "Love Lessons. I heard that you give lessons to people that are shy, alone, and uneducated in the art of seduction and beauty."

            "True." Shio said. "Alright then, I will get you a schedule as soon as possible. Would you like private or group lessons?"

            "Private." 

            "Okay."

            "And don't tell Miroku."

            "No problem." He patted her on the back and she left the shed. 

            Miroku and Inu Yasha sweatdropped. Shippou looked like he was going to wet his pants with happiness, Kagome looked depressed and glorified at the same time, and Sango looked like she was on tranquilizers. 

            "Maybe he's a drug dealer now?" Miroku suggested. 

            Inu Yasha nodded.

            Sumiko came out of the hut. "Inu Yasha, if the FoxFather wanted too, he would have seen you first and only, but now as it comes to his best bud and a member of the holy church, he is obligated to let the buddist go first."

            "Oh come on!" Inu Yasha said as Miroku got up and went in. He went straight up to Shio. "Whatever Shippou's taking I'll take two of em', and whatever Sango's taking-"

            "Calm down, Preistman, I'm not a coke pusher." 

            Miroku sat down disappointedly. "Right, I knew that."

            "How can I help you, my oxymoronic friend?" Shio asked.

            "I need lessons!" Miroku said. 

            "Lessons?"

            "Love lessons."

            Shio paused in a minor attack of déjà vu. "Would you like privet or group lessons?"

            "Private if you will."

            "Fine."

            "Also, don't tell Sango."

            "Yeeeeahh." he said. "The Foxfather will bring you a schedule soon."

            "Thanks Shio!" and with that Miroku left. 

            Inu Yasha came in grumbling about being last. He went up to Shio who leaned back a little bit. "Alright Shio, we need to talk-"

            "Hold on, let me ask something first – are you still with Kikyo?"

            "What? I don't-"

            "Dude! She isn't even alive! I can describe her in three words: Zombie, Hater, and Bad in bed!"

            "Shut it for a second Shio, this is important!" 

            "Yes?"

            "Okay." Inu Yasha said. He looked very upset at something. He hung his head and said, "I need you to convince Kagome that she's not carrying my pup." 

            Shio raised an eyebrow at him. "Why?"

            "Because it's not mine!"

            "How do you know?" Shio asked.

            "Because I know it isn't!" Inu Yasha shouted.

            Shio looked at him calmly. Then stood up and went around his desk. "As my sister once said to me when I laughed during meditation."

            WHOMP! 

            Shio hit Inu Yasha right on top of the head and mimicked his sister Sashimi's voice, "Grow up, you puppy!"

            Inu Yasha clutched the lump on his head. Shio could also mimick his sister's punches. "You hit like a girl."

            "So do you. She was _your_ fighting teacher." Shio replied. 

            "Are you going to help me or not?" Inu Yasha asked.

            "Fraid I can't, man." Shio said scooting Kirara out of his lap. 

            "Why?" 

            "Because it's not the truth." Shio said.

            "What's not the truth?"

            "That the baby isn't yours." Shio said.

            "Let me guess, Kagome told you that right?" Inu Yasha asked.

            "Yes." 

            "And you believe her word over mine?"

            "Yes."

            "You trust her lies over my truth."

            "Yes….no wait!.....Yeah. I do." 

            Inu Yasha tossed his hand in frustration. "I don't believe this shit!" 

            "Exactly what I was thinking." Shio said looking right at him.

            "There is no way in hell that that kid is mine!" Inu Yasha stood up and pointed at the door as if he were pointing right at Kagome.

            "Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" Shio asked him calmly also standing up.

            Inu Yasha looked at him, growled then went stomping out of the shed. "Fine! I understand! You always were catwhipped!" 

            Shio's eyes widened. A green flash zoomed past Inu Yasha and infront of him. Shio stood there with his eyes narrowed. "Excuse me?"

            "You heard me! When you aren't seducing them, you let women push you around! That's why you're not in any real relationship because you'll end up being the bitch!!" 

            Shio's eye twitched. "I think if I had anything to fear about a relationship, it would be to end up with one like yours! Twisting my mind out of proportion just because I can't decide between a sour memory and a hot chick in a short skirt! Talk about sad!"

            "You can offer love advice to others, why don't you give advice to a mirror!!" 

            "At least I can differentiate between positive and negative relationships!"

            They growled at each other just like canines.

            Everyone sitting on the log stared. Shippou pulled a bag of popcorn from behind his back and stuffed a handful into his mouth. 

            "You're such a freaking liar!" Inu Yasha shouted.

            "You're a liar to yourself!" Shio shouted.

            I: "Jerk!"

            S: "Fool!" 

            I: "Ham!" 

            S: "Claude!" 

            I: "Freak!"

            S: "Bastard!" 

            I: "Bitch!"

            S: "Albino!" 

            I: "Sucker!" 

            S: "Swallower!"

            I: "Prostitute!"

            S: "Necromaniac!" 

            I: "Incest Sicko!"

            S: "Expiramentor!"

            I: "Brownie Lover!"

            S: "Illegitimate Father!" 

            I: "Female!"

            Shio looked taken aback. "Female?!"

            Inu Yasha, "You're feminine looking, I'll bet you have a vagina!" 

            Shio: *hesitates on a word under his breath - the worst thing he could say* "..h-ha-ha-HALF DEMON SCUM!!"

            WHACK!!

            Shio was knocked off of his feet, flew a short distance, and fell onto a patch of flowers. 

            "Shio!" Kagome shouted.

            "Is he alright?!" Shippou asked. 

            Inu Yasha looked at his knuckles. There was a thin, bloody cut across the middle and index knuckle. He looked over at Shio who after a moment strained to get up. Any normal person would probably have their head do a 360 with a punch like that. Shio groaned and sat up. He pushed aside his hair and rubbed his hand over his face. When he pulled his hand back to look at it, there was blood smeared all over his palm, and with his palm, he had smeared the blood all over his face. A bloody nose…

            Inu Yasha came running over to him. Everyone else started to run over too. Right within thirteen feet of him though, Miroku stopped them. "No! Stay back!"

            "Miroku!! Shio's hurt!" Kagome said.

            "His demon energy is building up rapidly!" Miroku said. "It's dangerous to get close!" 

            Inu Yasha's shadow fell over Shio. "Man, I'm sorry," the hanyo said. "Seriously, I didn't mean too-"   
            "You hit me!" Shio said all of a sudden. "-in the face!" 

            "I'm so sorry." Inu Yasha said again. He offered his hand to help him up. "It's my fault, Shio. Don't get mad, really," 

            Shio looked up at him, his eyes narrowed and blood smeared across his cheek,chin, and forehead from his nose. "You're sorry?"

            "I'm seriously, seriously sorry. What I did was stupid." He held out his hand. "No hard feelings?"

            Shio looked at the hand like he was going to bite it, but instead he took in and stood up. "No hard feelings, man." 

            Then he clocked Inu Yasha across the face. 

            That sent him flying across the grass like a skipping stone. He landed in front of the others who were huddled together. 

            "Inu Yasha!" Miroku appeared upside down from Inu's view. "You must run away now!" 

            "Why?" 

            "Shio's demon energy is doing some freaky shit!" Miroku said. (An: out of character dialogue..;;;)

            Shio growled deep in his throat as his hair and clothes blew around with an unseen wind. Quick as Sesshomaru almost, he was over by Inu Yasha, and grabbed him by the collar of his kimonos. "RRRRR, YOU JERK!!" Shio glared at Inu Yasha threw bright blood red eyes. "I'm trying to find a mate!!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT IF I LOOK LIKE FREAKING YOU!!!" 

            Inu Yasha stared back surprised that Shio would get so upset over something so small. Shio was supposed to be the sophisticated, little or no anger, lover not a fighter, wouldn't resort to violence unless it's a dire emergency kind of guy. 

            Suddenly Shio tilted his head back then threw it back toward Inu Yasha. There was a loud BONK from an attack so painful, everyone who saw and heard it winced. Shio hitting his head against Inu Yasha's was also something that he didn't do. But both of them had large red marks on their foreheads. Inu Yasha squinted through the pain at Shio, then charged him in retaliation. 

            "Oh this is bad." Miroku said shaking his head.

            Shippou closed his eyes. "They fight dirtier then girls!" 

            Kagome felt guilty for some reason.

            Sango was trying to figure out whether Shio would win, Inu Yasha would win, or they would knock each other out. 

            "What are we going to do?" Kagome asked. "We can't just sit here and watch them kill each other!!"

            Sumiko went up to Kagome and held out Naraku. "Miss Lady, can you hold Chocolate Monkey Man?"           

            "Huh?" Kagome took Naraku as Sumiko went searching through her kimono for something. 

            There was a scream from the battlefield as someone got bitten. 

            "Hey, _HEY_, **_HEY!_!!" Sumiko shouted suddenly coming toward them. **

            "Sumiko come back!" Sango shouted.

            "OFFSIDE! FOUL! PENALTY!!" The little girl suddenly pulled a thin whistle out of her kimono. Her ears tucked inside themselves and she blew hard into the whistle. 

Everyone on the sideline didn't hear anything. But Inu Yasha and Shio instantly separated, covered their ears threw their heads back and screamed at the top of their lungs. 

            "WHAT THE F*CK!?!" Inu Yasha shouted.

            "Draw!" Sumiko shouted and pointed. "Go to opposite sides of the ring and stay!"

            They ignored her and went back to fighting.

            Sumiko blew into the whistle harder. 

            Once again they clutched their ears and screamed. But this time they also fell over, writhing in pain. She opened her ears out and the others finally came running over. 

            "Sumiko, what did you do?" Shippou jumped onto her shoulder. 

            She held up her small tin dog whistle and smiled. "I try not to abuse it!" ^_^ Then she looked at Kagome, "Why didn't you just say Sit?" 

            Kagome looked surprised then embarrassed as she fell to her knees. "That's right! Why didn't I?"

            Sumiko patted her on the head. "Okay, I luv ya, buh bye!" ^_^


	10. I'm Here to Learn

You know what? I'm supposed to draw a picture of myself for art….but I really don't feel like doing it. 

--~--~--~--

_Kagome: Oh my god, this is like the hardest thing in the world._

_Inu__ Yasha: Do you know what you're doing at all? _

_Kagome: This is my first time, just gimme a chance, alright?__ I can do this…_

_Inu__ Yasha: You know you can back out of this anytime…._

_Kagome: No way! I'm gonna keep going till I get it right! _

_Inu__ Yasha: You have that much stamina? _

_Kagome: You know it! …Now this goes here and…AAAAAAAHHH!!!_

_Inu__ Yasha: ?!_

_Kagome: *tosses her VCR out the window* That's it!! I've done all I can do! I'll never be able to set the time on that freakn' thing!!!! _

_Inu__ Yasha: That was quick…;;;;_

_Kagome: *huffs loudly*_

_Inu__ Yasha: Now what do we do?_

_Kagome: *Thinks for a second then says* How about I give the disclaimer then we go somewhere and makeout?_

_Inu__ Yasha: *suddenly perks up* Okay._

_Kagome: Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha…_

_Inu__ Yasha: *picks up Kagome bridal style and hops off*_

_(This disclaimer is not related to the story, it is just a disclaimer….feel free to be angry and confused….)_

--

Chapter 9. I Came Here to Learn

--

            "I don't even know where she got that whistle." Shio said out loud. He was looking at his scratches and bruises in a small mirror that Kagome let him use. Sumiko was disinfecting his scrapes. "Don't worry, Kitty." She comforted him. "You'll be your pretty self again in a few hours." 

            "Until then I have to look like this," he said looking directly into the mirror. There was a dark bruise on his jaw and a couple of cuts here and there. He glared over his shoulder where Inu was as Inu looked over his shoulder and glared back. Then Shio looked back at Sumiko. "Though I still don't understand why you can't just heal me yourself. Aren't you good at that now?"

            Sumiko shook her head, "Sister said not to waste my power using it on you since you have demon healing."

            Shio sweatdropped. "That's cold."

            Meanwhile Inu Yasha was having his wounds cleaned by Miroku. Sango wouldn't do it, and Shippou wouldn't and if he did, he wouldn't know how. And they defiantly wouldn't make Kagome do it, so that left the monk. 

            Inu Yasha growled. 

            "Inu Yasha, why don't you just admit that it's your child? It would be a lot better for your health." Miroku said.

            "What? And ruin the plot?" Inu Yasha glared back at Shio again.

            "It seems silly for you to keep denying it. What makes you think that-"

            "Miroku, if you shut up now, I'll get you a dirty magazine later."

            "Deal."

            Sumiko walked over and stood in front of Kagome. Naraku clung to her shoulder like a fashion accessory. 

            "Yes Sumiko?"

            Sumiko held Kagome's hands. "Would the nice skirt lady bear Shio's child?"

            Shio facefaulted. "WHA?!" ;;;;

            Kagome looked at her in disbelief. Actually, everyone kinda looked at Sumiko like she was nuts.

            "Shio needs a mate. Do you wanna be it?" 

            Then she looked back at Inu Yasha who was growling but not looking in her direction. "Oh yeah!" she smiled and snapped her fingers. "Sumiko forgot that the skirt lady is Puppy's mate!" This time Inu Yasha facefaulted.

            He got up in an eleven year olds face. "She ain't my mate."

            Sumiko giggled and pointed at him. "Puppy is cute!"

            Inu Yasha clentched his fist and a vein popped on his forehead. There was no convincing this kid. 

            All of a sudden, she was over by Sango and holding her hands, "San-goo, would you bear Shio's child?"

            Sango blushed and shouted, "Me?! No way!!" 

            Sumiko sighed sadly. "Darn."

            Naraku sighed too.

            Shio pulled her aside. "Sumiko, I don't think you should be asking women to bear my child." ;;;;

            "Why?" 

            "Because I-" he realized everyone in the group was staring at him. "Whoa! Hey!" he held up his hands. "Come on people! You know this isn't my bag!" ;;;;;;

            "Uh huh," Sango said narrowing her eyes.

            "Sure." Kagome said looking away and raising an eyebrow. 

            "It isn't! Don't you remember that Miroku does that stuff!?" he pointed at the priest and a big red arrow came out of no where and pointed at him with the word "pervert" written across it.

            "Whatever you say Shio." Inu Yasha said.

            Shio looked at them all in disbelief then sighed. T_T 

-

            Kikyo walked a steady pace behind Yukidaruma. She was going to watch him from a safe distance while he led her to her shikigami. She was a diehard believer that demons were no good, and he was no excuse. 

            "Tired?" he looked back and asked.

            "No." she answered in a low voice. 

            "Just checking." He nodded and concentrated on the road again.

            Why did he keep doing that? Every so often, he would look back at her and ask if she was tired, as if she were some weak human like everyone else. She hated men who stereotyped. "Why? Are you waiting for me to collapse from exhaustion?"

            There was a slight pause before he answered, "Well…yes actually."

            She narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm not some weakling you'd find in a hamlet, demon. I can take care of myself you know."

            "I'm sure you can." He said. 

            "If you're really sure, then how come you're so ready for the moment I get tired?"

            He shrugged. "If you did collapse, then I could carry you."

            Kikyo almost stopped walking in confusion. "Carry me? What are you talking about?"

            He shrugged. "Nevermind. Forget about it."

            She gave him a suspicious stare. "What kind of trickster are you?"

            "I am no trickster. Just a simple demon, that's all." He stated as if it were that simple. 

            She still stared at him as if he were a ticking time bomb. He didn't look like much of a demon. Most demons had animal tails or ears or parts like that that they were unable to hide in their human form. The only thing about him that made him seem not human was the look in his cold look in his eyes and the aura that would chill any ordinary human that came close enough to him. 

            So he said that he wasn't a con artist, but there was some charm to the way he spoke that made him an obvious enchanter. "Are you an enchanter?" she suddenly asked.

            After a few moments he replied. "Maybe. How would you define what an enchanter is?" 

            Kikyo watched the back of his head. His hair was black as ebony and sleek like ice. "A beautiful creature that can magically charm others into doing it's bidding."

            Yukidaruma smirked mysteriously to himself. "Well, I don't know about that. I don't know very much lady priestess, but thank you for calling me beautiful."

            Kikyo's eyes widened slightly, it _was magic. "It's only a definition."_

            Yukidaruma nodded. "By far, enchanter's are not always easy to spot. They could be anywhere, even the most unexpected places."

            Kikyo watched him for a few moments then finally asked. "Do you know a demon named Shio?"

            All of a sudden, Yukidaruma stopped walking. Kikyo stopped too, but her expression didn't change.

            "Shio?" he whispered. His fists suddenly clenched together, tightening until his knuckles cracked. "No. Never heard of him." 

            Suddenly the wind around them became colder. "Let's keep going then, lady priestess….find you're soul collectors as soon as possible."

-

            "Ugh!" Kagome moaned and leaned forward on her bicycle handles. She had been walking next to it because it hurt more to sit on it. 

            "Are you okay, Kagome?" Shippou asked from the bike basket. 

            She looked down at the ground with half lidded eyes and a few sweatdrops. "So much pain. Cramps…." T_T

            "Why don't we rest then?" Miroku suggested. It was a guilty pleasure, but now a day, Kagome's condition was the best excuse to stop working. As soon as everyone began to spread out and make camp, Shio pulled Sango aside for the private lessons she ordered. And so as not to arouse suspicion, Shippou was in charge of diverting attention from her absence. 

            "Hey look what I got!!" Shippou held up a hand full of unactive spell scrolls and a fragile Buddha figurine that Miroku had been carrying with him.

            "Wha?? HEY!!" he suddenly noticed what Shippou had and got to his feet. "Shippou! Those are not toys!!" 

            "WAHAHAHAHAA!!! CATCH ME IF YOU CAN!!!" and he began to run like the wind. 

            Sumiko grabbed Naraku and ran after them just because it looked like fun.        

            Inu Yasha sat watching and smiling.

            "Inu Yasha help me!!" Miroku shouted.

            "Not a chance…" Inu Yasha said. I mean really, you had to grab the little chuckles when you could…

            Meanwhile, Kagome realized that no one was paying attention so no one would really care what she was doing. She gratefully dropped her backpack on the ground and her bike against a tree. This pregnancy made her very spiritually aware and somewhat happy inside. Maybe it was the motherly instinct. It was like carrying a special secret that only she herself (and Inu Yasha if he ever came to his senses) could share. But she didn't have much time left until the birth. If her calendar and the pregnancy guide given to her by the doctor himself served right, she only had about three months or so. 

            She took a few seconds to search for the softest patch of grass she could find. Then she slowly lowered herself down on it. Her and her special secret. The baby rolled and kicked on the way down. Kagome pulled her legs into a cross-legged position and huffed finding it very hard work and kind of uncomfortable. But if she wanted done what she wanted done, she had to sit in a comfortable position. She pulled her legs out of position then pivoted on her tuffet of grass so that she wasn't facing the characters still in the campsite. She bent her knees and spread her legs far apart so that her belly had room to hang out. 

            She took a deep breath and reached on arm under her shirt and bra. With that hand under and the other hand above her shirt, she proceeded in massaging her nipples. If she wanted to breastfeed without feeling to much pain, she had to stretch out the nipples before hand, because that apparently made it much easier, less painful, and easier for the baby. 

            Something that Kagome should know by now is to expect the unexpected. Now because of the ignorance, I as a writer, a sicko, and a woman feel no sympathy for what is about to happen…

            Watching Sumiko chase Miroku, chase Shippou around was very entertaining, but somewhere between the fifth and sixth lap, Inu Yasha was shot with the thought to turn around for an even better show. ^_~

            (AN: This pervy ESP message was brought to you by the endocrine system! ^_^ Not always in our thoughts, but always in our hearts…and our blood streams…)

            And since Inu Yasha always obeys what the voices in his head (or heart) say, he turned around and saw Kagome with her back facing him. Well the endocrine system had done it's part. Now it was time for the curiosity to overwhelm him and then bring him to his demise. 

            He crept cautiously over, getting the feeling that whatever she was doing was secret. 

            (AN: Nooooo….really??....you think???)

            He stretched his neck trying to peer around her without her noticing he was there. He blinked and gulped. From this angle, it almost looked like she was…..

            He stifled a gasp which made him squeak. He sweat dropped and his eyes popped….Oh and here's something rich…..Inu Yasha has two heads, guess which one all of the blood rushed too?

            ^____^ Muwahahahahahahahahahaa…….no sympathy pho' yuu…….

            But as Kagome should know what's going on, Inu Yasha should have been even more aware then she was, but sadly, he wasn't. Suddenly, quick enough so that he couldn't look away on time, Kagome glanced over her shoulder and blinked at him. 

            Inu Yasha wrentched in shock. He would have been completely and totally mortified that he had been caught watching her while showing several signs of enjoyment….had it not been for the fact that he feared more for the faceplant sit spell that he know so well. In fact, a split second after she turned around and her eyes lit up acknowledging the perversion, the first six words that came into his mind were, '_Shit!! I'm toast!!!_' 

            "Hey, Inu Yasha." Kagome said casually. "Just getting ready for the baby."

            She didn't sit him. She didn't scream or slap him and call him a hentai. This strange response only freaked him out even more. He held up his arm in a defensive pose in front of his mouth and blushed furiously. "Getting ready for – ??? – Kagome!!?" he whispered franticly as the mortification began to set in. He closed his eyes tightly. "You're supposed to do that kind of stuff in private!!" 

            She gave him a funny look, surprised at how he was acting. You'd think that living in a third world environment like the feudal era, he'd be used to this sort of thing…instead of acting all shy and conservative. 

            "Not at all, Inu Yasha. This is a natural part of life." She said. She pressed too hard on one spot and moaned. That simple sound caused him to look at her like she was insane….or so that's how she_ thought_ he was looking at her….

            She ignored him for a few moments, but he was frozen in that position and expression. It was actually getting kind of annoying. "Take a picture, it'll last longer." She finally said in a slightly irritated tone. 

            Inu Yasha made a funny sound and turned around quickly. Otherwise, he didn't move his butt from that spot. Then there was this silence between them as Miroku, Shippou, and Sumiko were still – yes, they were _still_ running around – _completely_ unaware!! 

            Inu Yasha scooted into Kagome's view. He had his legs crossed and arms folded. He sat with a scowl and his on her. "It's natural, is it?"

            "Completely natural." Kagome said. Though with the way he was watching her, she was starting to get the jitters herself. 

            Inu Yasha glanced at the run around co stars then back at Kagome. "So….if – I'm just sitting here watching – for learning purposes – it's not considered….well…perverted….or anything…" he asked blushing deeply. 

            Kagome's eyes widened and she blushed. It obviously was a perverted request. Inu Yasha wouldn't sit and watch something just for learning. Just as a male doctor doesn't get a degree so that he can give mammograms for completely innocent purposes…..

-

            "Well Sango…"

            "Well Shio…" 

            She watched him like a hunter. 

            "First rule about my class." He folded his arms and looked all scholarly and spoke with a zen master accent. "Yu must trust the teacher." 

            "Why should I trust you?" she asked.

            "You the one who came to Shio Sensai's class, asking fo' lessons."

            "Still, how do I know you're no going to try and grope me or something perverted like that?" 

            He shrugged truthfully. "Yu don't."

            "What did you say?" she looked at him surprised that he actually agreed with her.

            "Yu don't know." He said with a calm expression on his face. "This is a class that teaches the art of love my way – this is not the hour I use for prostitution. But love has touchy feely stuff. As I tell all of my students, that when you graduate, you will not directly use any of my methods. You can learn how _I do things, and what __I have learned, but you will have to create your own style. And in fact, you have no choice! Everyone expresses love differently."_

            Sango nodded slowly in awe. He _did seem to know what he was talking about._

-

            When a woman becomes pregnant, her breasts enlarge, and her nipples get harder and darker in color as the body gets ready for the birth. 

            From inside, the baby had grown its legs and arms; both of which sets were crossed. Imagine living in a bubble of water for nine months, getting food through a cord in your belly button, moving very little, and not being able to see much around you. It was a sweet lifestyle! Uh huh…..

            As the massaging went on, the baby yawned, tucked its face in its arms and fell asleep in a semi conscious state where it was resting and listening to the lullaby of life going on just outside of its warm, peaceful haven. 

            Kagome knew she didn't have to stretch her nipples for more then what? 20-30 minutes a day? Yeah. She lost count a few moments and Inu Yasha started watching. He was a huge jerk for hysterically denying that it was his baby….but lordy…..maybe it was just the baby or the feel of being a mother….or the special baby secret….but he had become even more attractive then before she knew about the baby. 

-

"Love, Like, fancy, care for, favor, become enamored, fall for or be in love with." Shio recited from memory. "All synonyms for the word love – memorized from Roget's Thesaurus." 

AN: Guess what I don't own? Besides everything….the said thesaurus.)

Shio once again pulled out Kagome's sterio thing and pushed the play button. 

Tango music. 

"Do you know how to tango, Sango?" he asked posing in a tangoing stance. (AN: ^_^  tangoing stance….hehe…tango Sango….hehe….)

-

            Inu Yasha had a light blush and he watched with half lidded eyes. Suddenly he looked away and asked, "Sooooo, how is this supposed to help your kid again?" 

            Kagome just gave him a spaced out look. "Huh?" was all she could say. Like the baby, she was in a subconscious state between reality and the feeling of being with her baby and it's father.

            "Your kid." He said again, his eyes focusing a little bit better. "Why is this stretching thing important for you?"

            "Oh…" she said in a dreamy voice, slowly coming back into rational thought. "_My_ kid?" 

            "Yeah." He said. 

            She blinked and looked at him, more aware. "Don't you mean _our kid?" _

            Inu Yasha sighed and looked off to the side tiredly. "Do we have to go over that again right _now?" _

            Kagome frowned at him. He wasn't just denying it, he didn't want the baby either way. Thinking that, suddenly made Kagome want to hurt him badly. 

-

*dancers come together*

            "Now if I was any other teacher. I would tell you to get the books _Dating__ for Dummies, Karma Sutra, The Joy of Sex, The Everything Book of Sex, and Inu Yasha's Guide to Mating." Shio said._

*they go left* 

            "Quite a lot of books, no?" he asked.

            Sango nodded, trying to keep up with his pace. While he was a fast and more experienced dancer, she was a bit slower and in a way new at it. 

            "But I am not like other teachers," *spin* "I will not assign you to find all of these books for three reasons: One, that much reading material is distressing, and love is not something that should be distressed; Two, those books are heavy and expensive…and I don't think our readers would like to relive their school day with me; Third, books can teach a guy or girlie how to be home builders, potion makers, politicians and how to get a summer job. But there are two things that books cannot teach you how to be."

            "And what is that?" Sango asked.

*dip*

            He looked her straight in the eye and replied. "Books cannot make artists or lovers." *new pose and strut* "Books can help or offer advice, but they cannot teach a person the art of writing, poetry, or love. There is no norm for those things, and everyone thinks of them in different ways – Human and demon nature."

-

            "Fine, Inu Yasha." Kagome suddenly said in an acknowledging voice. "I'm fine with that."

            He raised an eyebrow, confused. "What are you talking about, wench?"

            Kagome began to press harder. "Fine. If you say that you are not the father, then you are not the father."

            He looked at her shocked. Was she actually agreeing with him??? Dogboy went pale. "_Hum-ma_?"  

            "That's right. I won't bother you anymore about it." She drew breath in through her teeth from the pain of her hard stretching, but continued at that pace. 

            He looked at her the same way he looked at her when she supposedly joked that she like lechers like Miroku. "For real?" 

            "For real, Inu Yasha." She said. "I won't ask you to do anything for me at all anymore. Since I'm going to be a single teenage mother, trying to protect myself and the baby from two cold worlds, I'll need to know how to reject pain and fear nothing."

            Inu Yasha's aura of shock tinted with realization and slight fear. 

            "So yes, Inu Yasha. You're free from my pushy hints, and the possible future we could have had together. Goodbye to that crazy idea." Her voice steadily grew with anger and sarcasm. "Now you can go on and live YOUR dream! To live with Kikyo, even though she's always traveling by herself, not even alive, creepy, psychotic, hateful, sterile, and completely lacking in emotion. I'm sure that you're looking forward to the day where both of you die together….oh, how healthy…." And she suddenly started whimpering. 

            The baby listened in the still darkness it floated in. _'Fine….wench….bother….for real….'  (AN: Just to let you know, the baby doesn't know how to talk. It's thinking in emotions and I'm translating it into English.)_

            Inu Yasha watched her wanting to say something, but he didn't know what to say. After a moment, he uttered the only words he could think of that wasn't bad or untruthful. "I…Please….Kagome…I don't want you to cry..…"

            "Well too late!" she snapped, causing a few tears to drip onto her knees. She stopped stretching and brought her hands up to her face to rub the corners of her now pushy eyes.

            Inu Yasha felt like shit. But our simple dog boy's brain has only so much capacity. Oh men of little brain….

            He looked down at the shiny tear drop on her knee. Kagome wasn't wearing long pants today. She still wore skirts, just ones that were a tad bit longer then her school uniform. Without thinking, he leaned forward and licked the salty dewdrop on her leg. 

            She was so surprised by this action she hiccupped and stared up at him with tear stained cheeks exposed to the wind. Surprise had made her stop crying. 

            While Inu Yasha was bent over his knees, he rolled himself onto his back using her lap as a pillow for his head. From this angle, he could smell her fertility better then ever. He looked up at her with puppy dog eyes. "Please don't cry, Kagome."

            Adorable and arousing, two birds with one stone. Without giving it much thought either, Kagome leaned forward over him and laid her head on his stomach. While she was over him like this, Inu Yasha took in the scent of her breasts which she had stretched well that past 45 minutes….

            The baby noticed a familiar feeling inside of its mother. _'What's happening?'_

Kagome sat up a little bit, and Inu propped himself up on his elbows and they kissed. 

            '_What's going on?' The baby thought franticly. _

            They kissed again then a third time tasting each other's tongues like ice cream cones. 

            The baby felt the change as the mother that it lived in was pushed onto her back. _'Hey!! What the hell are you doing to me??'_

Inu Yasha held her wrists above her head against the grass and kissed her deeper. 

            The baby felt his weight press on Kagome's. _'Ack!!__ Man whore!! What's wrong with you, you crazy bitch?! Push him off!!'_

            Kagome moaned. 

            _'No, Damn you!! Wait till I pop out before you try to 'pop in'!!'_

They rubbed themselves against each other through their clothes.

            _'Oh dear god!__ They're going to dry rut!! Sumiko!!! Help!!'_

~~~~NTFO)adoijf3nm///////////////%$YT)O( rw[~~~~~~~!!!!!!! 

            OO "HUH?!" Sumiko suddenly jumped as if hit by a bolt of lightening. She looked over in the direction of the two parental characters. "Eep!! I'm coming baby!!" she ran off screen then came back with a high power water hose and hit them with a tidal wave of ice cold water.

"DAAAHHH!!!!" they screamed.

"That's what you get for scaring your baby!!" Sumiko shouted. _She sure taught them a lesson!! _


	11. Personal

Yeah….I think I've got this worked out. I know exactly how and when Shio is going to meet his mate. How smrt am I? ^____^ I usually never think this far in advance! ….

-

_Sesshomaru: *dressed as a shirtless navy guy, comes out and stands with his arms folded* Must I say it? _

_Rin: *off screen* Yes!_

_Sesshomaru: Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha or any of the real story plot behind the real thing. Okay?_

_Rin: No, the other thing!_

_Sesshomaru: ;;;; Crap. Do I have to do the motions too?_

_Rin: Yes! _

_Sesshomaru: Alright. *deep sigh, says to the reviewers in deep sexy voice* I'm a navy guy, and if you love me in uniform, *hips thrust forward* you'll love me out of it. *wink*_

-

~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~  ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ 

Chapter 10. Personal

~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~

"Do you remember your homework?" Shio asked Sango as they walked back to camp. 

"Compliment myself daily, and not to be afraid to ask for any affection that I need." She recited as if she were reading cue cards.

"Good girl!!" ^__^ he smiled and held up a cookie. "Go on Sango, get the snack!" he tossed it and it went over her head. She didn't even attempt to get the stupid cookie. She just gave him a flat annoyed look. -__- ;;;;

Shio jumped out of the trees like he was at a surprise party. "We're back!!" 

Sango came out of the trees blushing and looking off to the side. As she passed him to go sit down, she gave a loud noticeable sigh. 

Miroku was calmly sitting by the camp fire that he had made, brewing a kettle of green tea over the hot plate from Kagome's time. Shippou sat a few feet away gagged and hog tied with a lump on his head. Naraku sat on Miroku's shoulder casually picking his toes. 

Kagome and Inu Yasha were soaking wet. They sat on their knees, leaning forward next to each other with guilty expressions on their faces. They kept their head's bowed. Sumiko, the great disciplinarian, paced back and forth behind them tapping a ruler in the palm of her hand. She kept shooting each of them looks that clearly said "shame on you" ever few seconds. 

"Uh-oh," Shio said coming over. "What did they do now?" 

Inu Yasha growled and glared at her out of the corner of his eyes. "Don't think that just because we did _that that I'm going to agree that it's my child."_

Kagome narrowed her eyes at him and grumbled. "You are such a whore." -.-

"ME?!" he shouted.

"Gosh, Inu Yasha, it's not like I'm asking for much here…"

"You want me to agree to be the father, how is that not much?!" 

"So you thought that by acting that way, you could get me to leave you alone!!" 

Wha?!!? WHATEVER!! You did that to me in order to get me to be the father!!"

Shio watched them go back and forth then sighed unhappily. "Why do the important things happen when I'm not there?"

Shio walked behind Inu Yasha, put his sandaled foot against the back of his kimono and pushed him face first into the dirt. "Inu Yasha, quit being a whore."

"I'M NOT BEING A WHORE!!!" he got up and waved his fist in Shio's face. 

Shio looked at him disappointedly. "Gosh man, you should know better then to do that."  V V ;;;;

"Do what?" Inu asked.

Before he could react, Shio reached up and twisted Inu's ear in a medieval, dog demon form of a titty twister. "Stand unguarded like that." He replied.

"DAAAH!!" Inu Yasha dropped to his knees and leaned forward clutching his poor throbbing ear, whimpering. 

"Alright muh peeps! Sit down!!" Sumiko went by them all and behind a large boulder where she kept her unseen, unlimited amount of props. 

When most of the pain was gone, Inu Yasha sat on his forelegs leaning over and propping his chin up on his crossed forearms. He scowled straight ahead with little unshed teardrops beside his eyes. "That bastard….so low…" he growled. 

"Inu Yasha?" Kagome asked looking down at him from her sitting position. 

"What?" he asked, not looking at her.

"Can you at least think about considering helping with the baby?" she asked in a small pleading voice. 

He sighed and looked down at the grass through half lidded eyes. "Kagome, I can't. It wouldn't feel right to me, it would be-"

Kagome suddenly leaned forward a little bit and licked the dog ear that was facing her like an ice cream cone. 

Inu Yasha's eyes popped. He paused in what he was saying to blush. 

Kagome sat up and looked down at him. "Yes?"

After a few seconds he recovered, "-not that I think it's stupid or anything, but it would be way to awkward, plus kids always bug-"

She lightly blew into the ear she had just licked. Making the spot that was still wet feel cooler from the breeze.

He giggled a little bit (yes giggled…you'd know how that felt if you have ticklish ears…) and he paused again.

She whispered close to his ear. "Yes?"

It took him a little bit longer to start again. "-and – and with all that's going on…"

She licked his ear again, except putting her tongue in deeper and pulling out from the edge of his ear lightly pressing her teeth against the thin sensitive skin.

His eyes rolled back and closed. His lips stayed partly open. 

"Yes?" she asked again.

"I-" he muttered dreamily. "I'll…think about it."

She smiled and went to bite his ear again but he held out a hand to stop her. "No wait…any more and Sumiko will try to hose us off again." He sat up with his usual scowl and a light tint of red across his cheeks. 

Sumiko came from behind the rock grinning from ear to ear. "Sumiko has a plan!" ^___^ 

"Head for the hills!" Shio said in fear.

"_HUSH!" Sumiko shouted in a deep voice that was not her own. Then she smiled at everyone else when he looked traumatized and said in her regular, sugar, snicker-doodle voice, "Okay! ^__^ Everyone gets a piece of paper and a pencil!!" she passed out the pieces of paper and pencils. To __everyone. Even Kirara and Naraku. She even handed some to the readers! (SU AN: ^_____^ Here you go, nice people!! * * *)_

"What are these for, Sumiko?" Miroku asked holding up his paper and Winnie the Pooh pencil. 

Sumiko smiled brightly, "We all write personals for Kitty-chan because he needs a mate!" ^___^ 

Everyone looked at Shio. His eyes widened and he blushed a little bit. "What??" ;;;

"But first, Kitty will talk 'bout himself!" ^_^ Sumiko cheered. She skipped over and pulled Shio into the middle of the spotlight before skipping off to her own pad and paper.

Shio glanced at everyone looking at him with their pencil's ready. He cleared his throat and began. "Okay then….my full name is Aka Shio-"

"Kitty! What about your middle name?!" Sumiko screamed.

Shio tilted his head forward and blushed. "I hate my middle name." he grumbled.

"What's his middle name?" Shippou asked.

"It's a cute name, Kitty-chan!" Sumiko smiled. ^___^ 

Shio grew twenty sweatdrops.

Inu Yasha looked confused. "I didn't know you had a middle name!"

Shio sweatdropped even more and mumbled… My full name is Aka….Sinclair Shio…" ;;;;;;;;;; 

Everyone: O O "Sinclair???"

"SHUT UP!!" Shio screamed and turned blood red. He pulled his loose hair in front of his eyes. "It's a stupid family name on my ma's side…" ;;;;;

"Oh it's so cute!" ^^ Sumiko cooed. 

Shio let his hair fall in front of his face. "God, it's nerdy!" ;;;;

"Oh no!" Kagome said. "It's a fine name!" 

"Y-Yeah, perfectly – perfectly normal!" Miroku commented. 

Shio looked up a bit.

Inu Yasha suddenly burst into hysterical laughter, "AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAA!!!!! SINCLAIR!!! WAHAHAHAHAAA!!!" 

"Inu Yasha, Sit!!" 

WHAM!! 

"Jeeze is he rude!!" Kagome glared at him. Then she gave Shio a nervous look. "If you want, we don't have to put your middle name on this."

Shio pouted and nodded. He sat very close to Kagome and leaned his head on her shoulder. "Would you do that for me, Kagome-chan?" he looked up at her with puppy dog eyes. She smiled and nodded.

Inu Yasha growled at him till he backed off. 

"Alright!" ^_^ Shio got up smiling without a trace of stage fright or awkwardness. "My name is Aka Shio, formally known as the pimpmaster and sexgod of Japan. I'm not too old, a couple sixty years or so, but I like to keep the form of a seventeen year old….because that's my maturity level…I'm an Aries, and born the year of the tiger. I'm a summer and dress to impress." – he paused for a wink– "Eye color: Emerald, Hair color Auburn…though once I tried to dye it blond but that was a catastrophe…I'm a mixed breed of demon….1/4th enchanter, 1/4th kitsune, ½  dog demon, and all hot stud!" ^_~

Pencils moved back and forth, as everyone wrote stuff down using rocks and Kagome's text books as flat surfaces. 

"Did you say you were an Aries?" Shippou asked.

"Yeah." Shio nodded.

"Hey! Inu Yasha's an Aries too!" Kagome said.

"Yeah I know!" ^_^ Shio smiled and gave Inu Yasha bunny ears. "We were born the same day! Cool, huh?" ^_^ V

Inu Yasha sweatdropped.

"That's amazing." Sango said.

"Anyway," Shio went back to the spotlight. "My turn off's are food stuck between teeth, big hairy hobbit feet, and girls who put themselves down…..turn on's are small feet, pretty hands, pale skin, purity, and intelligence."

Then he went to hobbies, "I enjoy the smooth sounds of the Supremes, pina coladas, and getting caught in the rain!" ^_^ 

"I'm looking for a beautiful woman who isn't afraid to hang out with a laid back demon such as myself. If you need me, ask around, I'm pretty well know in smaller circles."

Everyone glanced up at him for a few seconds before going back to their dictations.

Soon everyone had finished and they turned their papers in to the front, in an orderly fashion. 

"Tanx!" ^__^ Sumiko cheered. "Recess now!" 

Everyone left and Sumiko looked over their work.

------------------------------------------------

The personal written by Sango had: 

Aka Shio

17 yrs (60-something)

Tall, pretty, demon enchanter male searching for beautiful female who thinks they can tame this enigmatic personality. 

Zodiac Sign: Aries

Eye color: emerald

Hair color: auburn

Race: Mixed demon (Mulatto)

Dislikes: food stuck in teeth, big feet, girls who put themselves down

Likes: small feet, nice hands, fair skin, kind people, and cleverness

Hobbies: listening to the supremes, drinking pina coladas, and walking in the rain

The personal written by Shippou had: 

Shio

17 yeers old

Big, strong, and supper cool demen with a hueg sord looking four a mate who likes him…wich is eesy too do becaus he's supper coool!! 

 He's born the same day as Inu Yasha

Eyes: green

Hare: broun and red

He's a cool demon

Doesn't like: gross teeth, hairy feet, girls who are

Liks: littl feet, han ds, white scin, nise peepl, and 

The personal written by Miroku had: 

Aka Shio

17 year old human form

He is a mixed type of demon that needs to hold back it's power in a less terrible form. He is looking for a beautiful young woman who can "handle" him right ^_~

Chinese Zodiac: The strong willed tiger

Eyes: dark green

Hair: auburn

Dislikes: Females with poor oral hygiene, hairy toes, and girls who don't know how to have fun

Likes: small feet, elegant hands, soft skin, cute faces, nice rears….

Enjoys: hearing good music, pina coladas, and mountain hot springs

The personal written by Kagome had: 

Aka Shio

17 years old

Pretty kitsune boy looking for a nice girl who will like him for who he is * * * 

Sign: Aries

Eyes: emerald green with long red eyelashes

Hair: soft and silky sheets of straight auburn hair

Dislikes: girls who are not nice, girls who are lazy and don't take care of themselves, and girls who pretty much just don't care! 

Likes: small feet, good hands, good skin, kindness and brains

Hobbies: listening to music, long baths, and hanging out with friends

Kirara's personal didn't have anything except a paw print right in the center of it. Naraku's paper had a graphic picture of himself in his human form strangling the life out of Sumiko while he laughed vengefully. Sumiko just put it under the pile without noticing.

The personal written by Inu Yasha had:

_Aka Sinclar Shio_

_Sevintene_

_Mikst deemn gye lookin fur a maite ho woont laff at hiz korney midle nam_

_Sine: areis_

_Iyes: green_

_Haar: braun_

_Dosnt licke: grooss teef, gurls with fat feet, and stooped gurls_

_Lickes: ass, prosstitootes, sakae_

_Hobys: ass, prosstitootes, sakae_

The personal written by Sumiko had: 

Kitty

He's a big boy

The prettiest, smartest, nicest, bestest brother in the whole wide world and he's looking for his soul mate.

He's an aries…whatever that is…

His eyes are green like mine! 

His hair is really really long…it goes past his booty! 

He doesn't like it when you pull his tail. He doesn't like those white grape raisins, he said they're nasty….he purrs when you rub his stomach, he likes when you brush his hair, he likes to be pet because it makes him purr and be happy……he says he doesn't like his ears touched, but really, I think it makes him happy….

He likes free balloons, girls, cats, taffy, and he thinks it's hilarious when milk comes out of your nose! ^__^

Hobbies: He likes to play games, and act, and sing, and he likes children

And without a second glance, she sent them across Japan.

-

            "I grow tired of your secrecy!" Kikyo suddenly spat out her irritation. 

            Yukidaruma stopped and glanced back at her, surprised by her sudden outburst. "Pardons, Lady Priestess?"

            She glared at him. "I have been following you for kami knows how long and so far the only things you've said are-" she mimicked his voice, "'Tired, Miss Priestess?', 'Hungry, Miss Priestess?', 'Still back there, Miss Priestess?'" she growled in irritation. It was amazing how a person could irritate her so much by barely doing anything. 

            Yukidaruma looked at her in mild shock. He blinked innocently. "Ah…would you like me to speak more often, Miss Priestess? Is that it?"

            "Who are you??" she asked.

            "Yukidaruma the ice dragon. I study light, that I do-"

            "No, _who ****__are you?!" she shouted. _

            He watched her calmly yet interestedly as she threw her tantrum. Then he faced her all the way and said, "I'm sorry, Miss Priestess. I'm afraid that I'm a bit slow, I am. Could you be more specific, please?"

            "I'd like to know more then your name and occupation! Do you not have any background or were you born the day before you started following me?" she asked.

            He looked down at her with a thoughtful expression upon his snow white face. The irises of his eyes which were completely ice blue, seemed to pierce her own. "There's not much to say…"

            "Try me!" she said. 

            He looked off to the side then back at her. "My name is Ruroni Yukidaruma." (AN: Translated as "The Wandering Snowman" ^ ^) 

            I was born a very long time ago, a couple hundred years. My mother and father I don't remember well. Ice demons are very independent like that. So after the age of five, I was sent out on my own along with my sister Yumina who was not much younger then I was. Even though we lived separately, we stayed in close contact and often helped each other. When I turned thirteen in demon years, I found a pair of demons that had created "the light" which was supposedly one of the greatest and most versatile powers in the universe.

~~~(flashback)~~~~~*

            The sky was a brilliant bright blue without a smudge of clouds to be seen. Carved into the side of the mountain, was a village of demons and humans living together in complete harmony. One particularly nice home stood on a raised hill, with rocks cut into the sides. A flight of thirty or so stairs led up to the front door. It was a house, but it was also a dojo. Inside the studio of the dojo half, there sat two women. One of them, was a strong looking, female dog demon. She wore a bright white kimono long sleeved shirt and pants under pure silver armor. Very expensive indeed. She had spiky silver hair, which she pushed back behind her long, fuzzy, pointy ears. She also had lovely gray eyes. Her name was Sashimasu.

            Next to her, sat a beautiful enchantress kitsune. Her long silky ginger hair was so long, it touched the floor. Her ears were pointed like Sesshomaru's, and she had the japanse symbol, for the word "peace" painted on her forehead. She had intense emerald eyes, rosy cheeks, and bright red lips. She wore green kimonos decorated with designs of leaf chains. On the floor beside her was a long crudely carved staff with an amberish colored stone at the top of it. She kept her hand on the neck of the staff. Her name was Shin'yo. 

            They were in the middle of a girlfriend chat, when all of a sudden, Shin'yo became alert and held up her hand. "I sense a stranger." 

            Sashimasu paused in what she was saying and watched her friend in silence. The enchantress tightened the grip on her staff. Shin'yo stared at the floor, without really looking at it. Then after a moment, she loosened her grip and turned her head toward the front door. Sashimasu looked where Shin'yo looked. "What is it?"

            "Whatever it is, it is not hostile." Shin'yo replied. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Whoever or whatever it was, had the manners to knock first before entering.

            "Enter." Sashimasu called.

            The door opened a few inches, a pair of ghostly white fingers gripped the side frame and pushed it open a little bit more. A little demon boy peaked around the door timidly then stepped into view. He wore a white kimonos with a blue belt tied around his waste. He had black hair about as long as Miroku's with the ponytail left down. He wore a red sweatband pushing his hair up a little. He walked inside quietly with his head bowed shyly. He walked over to the two women and glanced up at them. He looked very nervous, and a light tint of red was spread over his cheeks. He asked in a low, unused voice, "Are you Shin'yo and Sashimasu?"

            Shin'yo nodded. 

            All of a sudden, the little boy dropped to his hands and knees. "Please, could you teach me how to use the light?"

            They looked at each other then down at him. "What do you mean?" Sashimasu asked. "What light are you talking about?"

            He blushed even deeper, "Well, I'm not exactly sure myself. I had a dream that told me to go find you and learn about 'the light'." 

            Sashimasu smirked at Shin'yo. Shin'yo smiled back and nodded. She got up and went over to the small boy. She waved her hand over his head in a mystical type manner. "Very interesting she stated and kneeled. She grabbed his chin, made him look up at her. He gave her a terrified expression as she looked into his eyes. She was intimidatingly beautiful. "You're an ice demon, are you? Simply amazing," she stated. "You're only a child, yet your powerful enough to make a human form, yourself."

            "Actually." He looked away in embarrassment. "It's a spell that keeps me this way."

            Shin'yo looked down. There was a blue ribbon with holy words written over it tied around his thin little wrist. "Oh my." She said.

            "I could make a human form if I tried really hard, but a priest put a spell on me because I was taking apples from his tree."

            Sashimasu giggled behind her hand causing the boy to close his eyes in shame.

            "What is your name?" Shin'yo asked.

            "Ruroni Yukidaruma." He said. 

            Shin'yo smiled at him. "Well Mr. Ruroni, Sashimasu and I have told no one about the light except for two other people: her husband, and her daughter. The light is only half ready for a world of darkness such as this one and should not be taught to nosy young men." 

            Yukidaruma looked sad and ashamed, until Shin'yo let go of him and gave him a kindhearted smile. "But you seem to be an exceptional case. You will be the learning partner of Sashimasu's daughter. She is also learning about the light."

            Yukidaruma's jaw dropped and he stared at her shocked. "Re-really??" ;;;

            Sashimasu popped up next to him, "Really really!" ^_^ 

            "Ah!" Yukidaruma bowed again. "Thank you, very much!"

~~~(end flashback)~~~

            Kikyo watched him in silent awe. She looked down at his wrist which still had a blue ribbon tied around it. 

            He smiled and nodded. "Well standing here while I talk isn't making good time in our search. Why don't we keep walking – I'll tell you the story as we walk, okay?"

            Kikyo nodded and walked next to him as they continued on their journey to find her shikigami. 

-

            Yay! And so the ninth month had come. And for Kagome, it was good and bad…though some of the time, she could have sworn it was more bad then good. Yes, she was excited that she was a soon to be mother. Yes, she liked to daydream about the babies appearance.  Yes, she was happy that everyone was willing to help her in her time of need…and Inu said he'd "think about it"….Hey! It's better then nothing, ya' know! 

            "I still can't figure out how Sumiko can communicate with the baby somehow." Shio said out loud. "Weird."

            "Quite an enigma." Miroku said. He picked up a can of lemon water and popped the tap. "Want some soda, Lady Kagome?"

            "Ugh! No thanks!" she waved it off. "I'd probably throw it back up. Besides, I'm not sure if caffeine is good for the baby."

            "Hey, Sumiko!" Shio called.

            "Huh?" she looked up from the berry spells she was casting with Shippou and Naraku. They turned one berry into Inu Yasha, another into Kagome, and the other into Sesshomaru. Shippou was making the Kagome "sit" the Inu Yasha continuously, and Sumiko was making the Sesshomaru do ballet. Sumiko had to restrain Naraku from trying to beat the berry spell creatures with his fists. 

            "How is it that you can understand what the baby is thinking, huh?" Shio asked her.

            She smiled and stood up. "Because the baby is a baby, as I am a baby sister I am!" she hugged herself. 

            Shio: "…..oh."

            Inu Yasha sat in his regular sitting position, tapping his fingers and bobbing his knee up and down on the grass. 

            Shio noticed his anxiety, leaned toward him a little and whispered, "Anxious?"

            "What?" Inu Yasha suddenly stopped his fidgeting and looked at him. 

            "Cause you know there's a cure for that…though it might not be safe for Kagome if she does it this late in the pregnancy –"

            _"What the hell are you talking about??" Inu Yasha frowned at him. _

            "Inu Yasha, settle down, the baby isn't due for at least…." Sango looked upwards. "How long Shio?"

            "I am not anxious!!" Inu Yasha shouted.

            "About two weeks or so," Shio said looking through Kagome's stock of drinks. "Oh fertility goddess, do you have anything that isn't carbonated?" 

            "Well yeah, I have some juice boxes in the front of my backpack." She pointed. 

            "Cool! Thanks!" Shio said pulling out a pink Juicy Juice. 

            (AN: I do not own Juicy Juice, but if I did, I      would be rich like Michael Jackson, except without the molestations and skeleton nose.)

            (Sara: Nose? What nose?)

            (AN: exactly...)

            "I ain't anxious!" Inu Yasha growled. 

            "Dude, you're about to jump out of your skin!" Shio said taking a sip of his juice. He looked at Kagome and nodded, "He's just excited about the baby." 

            "Shut up, Shio! Quit telling lies!"

            "It's not lies, it's psychology! Father's anxiety!" 

            "Nooooo, it's stupidity! Fox/Dog's Murder!" 

            Shio narrowed his eyes at him. "Gee, I wonder how far around your ear can twist?"

            Inu Yasha shuddered and backed off of the topic. 

            Kagome suddenly rolled onto her side, and struggled to stand up. "Ugh! Paaain!!" No, she didn't like the fact that she looked like she was smuggling a beach ball. No, she didn't like vomiting and major cramps. No, she didn't like standing up!

            As she was turned around, Shio laid a hand beside his mouth and said in Inu Yasha's voice, "Need any help, Kagome?"

            She groaned and looked back at Inu with sweatdrops forming on her face. "Yeah, thanks, Inu Yasha."

            Inu Yasha's eyes popped and he growled at Shio.

            Shio gave a peace sign and smiled, "Sorry, man! ^_^V Just keepin' it real!" 

            Inu Yasha sighed and stood up to help her like a good little puppy. He stood behind her. "Okay, what am I supposed to do?"

            "Just uh," she stood on her hands and feet. "Just – give me some support…"

            He shrugged and leaned over her to hold her waist when all of a sudden, a memory from the joy of sex popped into his mind. _This is sorta' like the position for doggy style! _OO He blushed a bit. 

            "Okay…one…two…" Kagome pushed herself into a standing position. "Okay! ^_^ Thanks Inu Yasha!"

            He hesitated to let her go, but finally did and nodded, "Uh, yeah…"

            Shio and Miroku brought their drinks up to their lips and snickered. 

            Naraku pounded the Inu Yasha berry creature and got raspberry all over the side of his hand.

            "Oh Chocolate Monkey Man!" Sumiko said shaking her head. She took his fist and whipped the berry juice off of it. Meanwhile, Naraku was feeling quite refreshed. 

            And of course, Kagome made Inu Yasha walk her to her sleeping bag. "It's pretty hard to be pregnant…." She commented.

            "I don't know." Inu Yasha said with a sweat drop. I mean what? Was she expecting him to agree with her or something?? ;;;

            They stopped at her sleeping bag, then Kagome held onto his arms as he slowly lowered her down on the bed. (AN:..oooooo, that last part of the sentence sounded fruitful. ^ ^)

            "Comfortable?" he asked. 

            She looked up at him with a painful smile. "Not really, but thank you for helping me feel a little more comfortable then I was." 

            Inu Yasha looked over his shoulder. The place where everyone was sitting was blocked by a boulder thingy. He patted the side of the bed, said, "Good night, Kagome." And stood up to leave.

            "Wait!" Kagome snatched a handful of his pantleg. 

            Inu Yasha froze with that leg in mid-rise. "Yes, Kagome?"

            She looked up at him pleadingly. "Please stay with me." 

            Inu Yasha sweatdropped and for some reason he didn't feel like being mean. "Why?" he asked softly. 

            Kagome liked the way his kimono felt. It was always so soft and snuggly. "It's cold over here. The fire's too far away, please stay with me."

            Now all Inu would have to do is say, 'Well okay then, I'll move your sleeping bag closer to the fire.' Or '"I'll get you an extra blanket.'

            But he didn't. ^-^ 

            Inu Yasha knelt down and laid next to her on the sleeping bag, on his back with his hands resting on his stomach. 

            (An:…..nah…too shanty…) 

            But just when he thought he was totally safe, Kagome rolled against him at a 45 degree angle, since if she were to put her stomach against him, that would be the only part of her against him…..She tried to reach her left arm over to hug and get warmth from him, but her darn breasts were in the way…

            (AN: darn breasts…always getting in the way… if she hadn't have gotten those implants, then maybe she might have been able to reach him!....but noooooo, they just HAD to bounce just right!! Feh… ;;;;)

            On the other side of the boulder thingy, no one could see what was going on, but you can bet they were leaning sideways, and holding their breaths so that they could listen. 

            Sango sat petting Kirara whose ears twitched to listen as well. Naraku sweat dropped. Stupid humans…- - ;;;;

            Sumiko made a new Inu Yasha image out of a berry and made it do a scene from swan lake with the already ballet-ing Sessy. 

            "Wow," Shio whispered. "This is the quietest sex I've ever heard." He took a sip of his juicy juice then glared at it and said, "100% real juice my tail!"

            Inu Yasha rolled his eyes, tired of watching Kagome try to reach her arm over, so reached out and held the hand with the one he wasn't laying on. Kagome squeezed his hand. "Thank you, Inu Yasha." 

            He blushed a bit and scooted closer to her. He got off of his other arm and slipped it under Kagome's side and around her back. She leaned her head against him. Even though she wouldn't tell the stubborn dog boy herself, she knew that they would be laying exactly the way they were at that moment if he actually admitted to being the father.     She closed her eyes, hoping he would never leave her.

            Well, it was dark, none of the group members could see them, and he was high with fatherly feelings. Inu Yasha felt like pressing his luck. Using that arm he had wrapped around her, he moved it up, pulling her closer, and rubbed his hand over her rounded stomach. It kicked.

            Sumiko poked the berry creature when all of a sudden, she heard a loud pop in her mind. She blinked, to alertness and sat up facing the boulder. "Time already?"

            Kagome opened her eyes as she felt her insides pulse. Then as her legs suddenly became wet, she was attacked by the most incredible pain she had ever felt in her life. "F*CK!!" she screamed.

            Inu Yasha looked at her in total shocked. _"Na?!"_

She started chanting, "F*ck! F*ck! F****CK!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!" 

            Sango covered Shippou's ears and he struggled to get her off. 

            Shio nodded to himself, "Well yeah, that does sound more like the first time." He took a sip of his juice.

            "_What?! What is it?!" Inu Yasha backed off of her, horrified. _

            She grabbed the front of his shirt violently and huffed, "BABY!!!....COMING!!!"

            "NANI!?!" he screamed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy crap! O_o 12 freakn' pages!!! Not bad, huh?? And Mr. Spellcheck says I have at least 5000 words!! I am kicking ass here!! 

(Sara: But it took you so long to kick it…)

Shut up, you! ;;;


	12. The Mirical of Birth

Ooooooo, bai-bah! ^___^ This is what I've been waiting for since chapter 2! ^_^V

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 11. The Miracle of Birth

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            "What do I do?? _What do I do??"  _Inu Yasha watched horrified and clueless. 

            Kagome screamed again, and the rest of the group came running over from behind the boulder. Sumiko stopped and pointed at Kagome. "See! I knew it!!" 

            Sango, Shio, and Shippou ran over to her aid.

            "She's really going into labor!" Shio said, surprised.       

            "It can't come right now!" Inu Yasha shouted, coming over. He knelt next to Kagome. "Shio said you have two weeks!" 

            Kagome gripped him by his shirt, pulled herself up a little and through her pain said, "I know that……you know that……._but the baby has it's own plans!!!"_ she howled in pain and let go of him. 

            "What are we going to do??" Sango asked. "She was supposed to go to her own time for this part!" 

            Shio looked at Kagome and shrugged. "I can deliver it."

            Everyone looked at him freaked out. (Except for Sumiko that is…she was listening to see if the baby was doing okay) 

            Even Kagome blushed and looked at him freaked out. "Y-you??" she asked. "But – don't you have to look down….._there_????" 

            He smiled at her and patted her hand. "Nothing I haven't seen before, Kagome!" ^_^ 

            She blushed even deeper. Then Inu Yasha intervened. "There is no way you're going to do it, Shio!"

            Shio shrugged again. "Alright, Kagome can have an unsupervised birth and have a higher risk of giving birth to a dead child – if that's what you really want, Man."

            "NO!" Kagome shouted. She reached out and pulled Shio's face inches from hers with amazing force. "If you're all that I have," she said in a not very dipsy doodle voice, "Then you're going to do it." She pushed him away.

            After his seconds of shock, Miroku and Sango helped Kagome to her feet and started to walk her down the road. 

            "Oh no you don't!" Inu Yasha suddenly shouted at them. He pushed Sango and Miroku away from Kagome, picked her up on his back and charged toward the nearest town or mansion.

-

            And so they found one. A little mansion on the outskirts of the last town they were at allowed for Kagome to give birth in one of their guestrooms. Sango ran in and spread a mat out on the floor. Kagome was led in by Miroku and Inu Yasha and they set her gently on the mat. She whimpered and cried in pain. Sango and Inu Yasha each held one of her hands. "It's okay, Kagome you're going to be fine!" Sango tried to reassure her. She looked up at Inu Yasha who was doing a horrible job of looking cool and confident. "You too Inu Yasha! Stay calm for Kagome!" 

            "CaLm?!" his voice cracked. "I am calm!!" ;;;;;;;

            All of a sudden, Shio grabbed Inu Yasha and pulled him outside of the room. Sumiko, Naraku, Kirara, Miroku, and Shippou looked up when they came out.

            "Hold on," Shio said before Inu Yasha could say anything, "I just want to warn you, if you're going to be there with Kagome while she's doing this…Well…she might say some….well, colorful not nice things to you…." Shio looked at him seriously, "Just remember to stay calm and not take it to heart, okay?"

            Inu Yasha didn't really understand but nodded in agreement. 

            Shippou scratched his head. "I don't get it! Is giving birth painful or something?" 

            Inu Yasha glared down at him, "No, Shippou. Kagome's screaming because she's dreaming about roller coasters."

            "Really?" Oo Shippou said in amazement. 

            Inu Yasha bopped him on the head.

            "Dude!" Shio looked at Inu amazed. "You know what roller coasters are??" 

            "Ow!" T_T Shippou turned around to hold his throbbing head. But as he turned around, his tail sweapt a cloud of dust up into the air around Sumiko. She stood there innocently with Naraku hanging on her shoulder from behind when the cloud of dust passed in front of her eyes and nose. Her nose wrinkled, "Ah….Ahah….TIEU!!"

BLING!!!

            Shio turned to look at her, but the only thing he was stars. 

BONK!!

            Sumiko brought her elbow down on his head, knocking him unconscious. Everyone in the hall stared at the seventeen year old Sumiko in amazement. 

            "What the f*ck??" Inu Yasha said. 

            Sumiko smirked at him and said in a deeper feminine voice. "Come on, Inu Yasha! We've got a baby to deliver!" She grabbed his arm and pulled him back into the "emergency room".

            Sango looked at her wide eyed, "You!" 

            "You can freak out later," Sumiko said, spreading Kagome's legs farther apart. "How far apart are the contractions?"

            Kagome screamed, "_Kyaa__!! Somebody kill me!!" _

-

            Things went silent in the room.

            "I guess you're not dilated enough." Sumiko said, examining the opening. 

            Kagome laid back whimpering. "I'll bet if god was a girl, he would have given the guy the pain during birth instead." She whimpered and said louder, "Damn you, Eve! T_T You just had to eat that f*cking apple!!" 

            "What the hell is she talking about?" Inu Yasha asked.

            "I have no idea." Sango said and yawned. "What time is it?" 

            "I dunno." Inu Yasha said he sat against the wall next to her as they waited for the next contraction to happen. 

            Sango looked down at Kirara who was asleep in her lap. She sighed from exhaustion and looked up at Inu Yasha. Her eyes widened, "Hey!" 

            "What?" he asked. His hair started to turn black. 

            Sumiko watched as Inu Yasha changed from demon to human. "New moon, huh?" she asked. "Nice timing."

            "I'll say." He would have growled that statement if he wasn't so exhausted. 

            "Ohhh!!" Kagome squirmed, "It's back!!" ;;;;

            "Ready!" Sumiko said.

            Inu Yasha and Sango came back over. 

-

            Later out in the hallway…..

            Shio: @__@ uggghhhhh…..

            Shippou stood over the fox/dog eating a banana that one of the servants gave him, "What did he say?"

            "I think he said, 'Boobs.'" Miroku said. 

            Shippou looked at Miroku with a sweatdrop. "_That didn't sound anything like 'Boobs'!" ;_;;;

            "How do you know what boobs sound like?" Miroku asked.

            Shio shook his head and sat up. "What happened?"

            "Sumiko turned you off." Shippou said casually. "Then she went to go help Kagome have a baby."

            "What??" he said sitting up. 

            All of a sudden, a blood curtling scream came from the delivery room, "AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! YOU F*CKING BASTARD!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!! YOU AND YOUR F*CKING P*NIS, YOU F*CKING JERK!!! YAAAHH!!!"

            "Uh oh." Shio said. 

            Shippou sweatdropped, broke the banana in half and mooshed them into his fragile virgin ears. 

            Naraku cringed but continued eating the banana given to him. 

            (AN: ^_^ Naraku is so cute as a little white monkey! That should be his fate someday! In here he's about the size of Ryo-ohki, or a kitten. ^_____^….whoops. Lost my train of thought..;;)

            Shio went into the room to find exactly why he had told Inu Yasha: "I just want to warn you, if you're going to be there with Kagome while she's doing this…Well…she might say some….colorful not nice things to you…. Just remember to stay calm and not take it to heart, okay?"

            Kirara sat trembling in the corner of the room covering her ears with her paws. Sumiko sweatdropped but kept her concentration on the baby. Sango kept her eyes closed tightly as if that would decrease Kagome's volume and profanity. 

            Kagome was far in labor and had become the evilest screaming wretch any of them had ever seen. She screamed at Inu Yasha, "DAMN YOU!!!! DAMN YOU TO HELL, MOTHERF*CKN' BITCH!!!! YOU ARE THE SCUM OF THE F*CKING EARTH!!! I F*CKING HATE YOU!!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I EVER SAW IN A PLAYN' PUSSY LIKE YOU!!!" 

            Inu yasha cringed as she squeezed the life out of his poor hand. For a human girl, her hands were quite strong. Add the pain in his hand, and the fact that her screams and insults stabbed him as well, and you got an expression on his face that looked like someone had told him that he was a woman and Sesshomaru was his mother.

            "Mercy!" Shio pulled handfuls of cotton out of the front of his pants and stuffed them in his ears. It didn't get rid of the screams but it brought them down to a sound level of 55 decibels. He came over, "My, what a potty mouth!" he screamed to Sumiko, "How long has this been going on??!"

            "I don't know!!" Sumiko screamed back.

            "What?!?!?" 

            "I DON'T KNOW!!!" She screamed again. 

            "WANT ME TO TAKE OVER??" he asked. 

            "YES!!" she moved over and he sat down in front of Kagome.

            "Keep going, I think I see something!!!" he shouted to her. 

            Sumiko reached into the neck of her shirt, pulled out two handfuls of cotton and stuck them in her ears. She looked at Inu Yasha who looked like he couldn't decide which emotion to show; shock, horror, heartbreak, bewilderment, or horniness. 

            Sumiko went over to him and patted his other hand reassuringly, though he didn't seem to notice. "STAY CALM, IT'S GONNA BE OKAY…" she said to him as if he were the one giving birth. 

            "I see the head!!" Shio shouted. 

            "Does it have dog ears?!" Sango asked.

            "I don't know!!" he shouted back. "It's covered in goo!!" 

            Inu Yasha and Sango leaned over to look at it.

            "HOLY CRAP!! O0 Inu Yasha screamed, choosing bewilderment. "THAT'S A BABY!!!" 

            Sango gave him a frustrated look, "NO DUH, INU YASHA!! WHAT DID YOU THINK CANDY AND PARTY FAVORS WOULD COME OUT OF HER?!?"

            Sumiko left Inu Yasha to go help Shio pull it out. 

            Kagome screamed again and gave one more push. She gasped for breath and relaxed, still in pain. After the buzzing sound in everybody's ears went away, they heard the sound of a baby crying. 

            Kagome opened her eyes which filled with unshed tears and her heart melted just at the sound. Inu Yasha sucked on his injured hand but his eyes were filled with emotion. Sango fell backwards with swirly eyes. "Oh gawd!" @_@;;; She groaned. 

            "Yay!! You did it!" Sumiko congratulated Kagome as she went to work cleaning the new mother up. 

            Shio's job was to clean the baby and check it for any problems before handing it over. 

            Sango finally sat up and wet a rag and cleaned off Kagome's face. "That was amazing Kagome. I don't think I would have been able to do that."

            Kagome panted and nodded. "Thank you." She turned to look at Inu Yasha with large watery eyes. 

            He saw her and his bewilderment toned to confusion. "Huh?"

            "Inu Yasha." She said in such a passionately happy way that it made him jump. 

            "Huh??" he said again.

            "I love you." she said smiling brightly. 

            "WHAT?" he went between horror, horniness, confusion, and bewilderment again. 

            She continued to look at him that way. "Inu Yasha?"

            "What?" he asked softly.

            "Can you get me some pillows?"

            "Uh huh." He darted out the door.

            They heard Shippou ask, "WHAT HAPPENED?" then they heard Inu Yasha step on him without really noticing. 

            Shio rubbed the goo off of the baby, checked it's natural reflexes and washed it thoroughly. The baby stopped crying and squirmed as he got the spaces behind its ears. 

            Inu Yasha came back with some pillows and propped Kagome up.

            Sumiko finished cleaning and pulled the blanket over Kagome's legs. "Well Shio?" she asked. The other characters came in to watch Inu Yasha's demise.

            He sat facing away from them and said, "Seven and a half pounds, 20 inches, reflexes: normal, startle reflexes: also normal, disabilities none." He smiled back at them, enjoying their suspense. "Sex: female…and quite healty too." ^_^

            "We don't care!" Sango shouted. "Just tell what it looks like!" 

            "A girl!" Kagome looked up at heaven with stars in her eyes.

            And with enough suspense given, Shio wrapped the baby up in a blanket, turned around and held her up for everyone to see. 

            She was small; about the size of Naraku, with little chubby arms and little chubby feet and tiny little toes and fingers. She had a little round head that was covered with a full head of feathery black hair. As Shio turned around and held her into the light, she rubber her eyes from the light and looked innocently at everyone in the room with large brown eyes. 

            Everyone: O O

            Shio, "Ah, I love suspence! ^_^ Congratulations, Kagome!" he handed the baby to her. "It's a human!" 

            Kagome squealed with joy and hugged the baby which looked at her wide eyed. "She's so beautiful!" she gasped happily. 

            Inu Yasha felt incredibly happy yet at the same time, heartbroken. But he decided to act cool as always and show his happiness. "HA! I knew it!" he exclaimed. 

            Almost everyone looked at him as he said triumphantly. "I knew it wasn't my daughter! ^_^ And you all doubted me!" 

            "What??" Sango said.

            "Actually, Inu Yasha," Kagome interrupted his victory dance. "You're half human, and I'm full human…which means there's a fifty percent chance that I'd have a half demon baby!" 

            "Oooooooh! Kagome's SMART!" Shippou cheered for her and Inu Yasha bopped him on the head. The baby looked up at Kagome in awe. 

            Inu Yasha smiled. He sighed, shook his head knowingly and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Ah, Kagome, Kagome, Kagome."

            "Yes?" she asked.

            "I know that you're smarter then that!" ^_^ he extended a hand to the baby, whom looked up at him and smiled. "Really, does this kid look a _thing like _me_?" _

            She looked down at the baby who reached up to grab her own human ear. "Hmmmm, I'm not sure." She said.

            "It looks a lot like Kagome." Shippou said taking a look for himself.

            Sumiko sat nearby and smirked mysteriously at Inu Yasha. 

            -

            The lord, his servants, and his family all came to see the baby that night. (Couldn't wait till morning.)

            They brought Kagome food that she refused to eat because she couldn't even look at food without getting sick. 

            And the women servants and members of the house would smile at the cuteness of the baby and say, "She's beautiful! The father must be very pleased!" 

            Then Inu Yasha would take that time to come over and tell them, "Sorry, but we all don't know who the father is!" ^_^ 

            Then the ladies would look shocked for a second. Then they would give Kagome and her baby a sympathetic bow and say, "Bless her sweet little heart." And they would walk away.

            Then Kagome would glare at Inu Yasha and say, "Osuwari."

            And he would hit the floorboards. 

            When babies are born, they are supposed to want to sleep. But not this baby! Heck no. She was laying on her back laughing and giggling at almost everything around her. 

            Shippou laughed, "She's awfully cute!" ^_^ He had almost completely forgotten that he had wanted it to be a boy. 

            "She sure is!" Kagome said, holding the baby's hand as it laughed happily. 

            Shio and Sumiko sat against the wall talking about Sumiko's changing appearance.

            "I really don't get it – Again!" Shio said a bit frustratedly. "You can change age, you communicate with babies? What's going on?"

            "Actually, I asked Sashimi." Sumiko said, "She said it has to do with the way I was brought back to life. Simply because they changed my age, and put spells on me – I'm still a bit unstable."

            "You are?" he said worriedly. "When are you going to stop being unstable?"

            "Whenever," She said. "I'm really eleven in demon years…..but because of that spell, I'm going to keep reverting back to the age of seventeen along with the part of the spell that gave me a power increase. As for the speaking to babies thing…well I'm very versatile with the light, and when a baby is inside of her mother, it is so pure that he or she is actually a pure source of light." She looked upward ponderously. "Hmmm….Maybe that's how Mother discovered Pure Light Power….intriguing!" 

            (An: If what she just said confused you, it's either because of compound sentencing, or because you didn't read the one before this….or I just forgot to re-read this and change confusing sentences around.)

            Miroku sat near Inu Yasha who sat in his usual position, far away from the baby with his eyes closed and a smile spread across his face. The monk rolled his eyes and asked, "Well Inu Yasha?" 

            Inu Yasha opened one eye to look at him. "Hm?" 

            "Aren't you going to go over to see the baby?" Miroku asked.

            After a moment he heard Inu Yasha give a "Feh" and say, "Why? It's not my daughter. It's not like I have to."

            Miroku suddenly sensed painful feelings coming from the poor human. "Inu Yasha?"

            Inu Yasha, turned his head to look at Miroku. It was sad. Inu Yasha was smirking like he was the happiest man alive, but his violet eyes were so filled with sadness, Miroku was silent.

            "It's not like it matters anyway." Inu Yasha said. "What does matter, is that I'm free!" He turned his head away and his long black hair hid his face. 

            Miroku sighed. Poor Inu Yasha. His pride would destroy him someday. 

            Sango sat nearby as Kagome played with the baby. Kagome noticed her smiling at them and asked, "What's up, Sango?" 

            Sango smiled at the baby. "I sort of envy you, Kagome."

            Kagome blinked, "Really? Why?" 

            Sango shrugged and said, "You have the most beautiful baby I've ever seen." Then she glanced to over at Miroku to make sure he wasn't listening and whispered to her friend, "I hope that I can have a baby someday."

            Kagome thought about what she said, then nodded. "That would be great, Sango!" then she looked upward dreamily. "Maybe someday, our children will play together!" 

            "Both girls you think?" Sango asked fantasizing with her.

            "Of course!" Kagome chimed. ^_^ 

            Shippou went to the window. "Hey! The sun's coming up, everybody!" he announced. 

            "Perfect!" Inu Yasha said. "I hate being a human." 

            The dark blue sky faded into a rich color of rose red. A sliver of light glittered in the horizon and light from Amaterasu's Necklace of light flowed across the land like a wave seawater on shore. (AN: Amaterasu was the goddess of the sun in Asian culture, fyi! ^_~…..crap..lost my train of thought again! ;;;)

            Then the sun rose into the sky, turning the ever red sky into the lightest shade of baby blue. Inu Yasha's aura illuminated and slowly changed back into his half demon form, complete with claws and fangs. 

            Suddenly Shippou pointed at the baby. "Look!" he screamed.

            The baby suddenly began to glow with a halo of light. Her little brown eyes widened as if she knew that there was something happening to her. Her hair fluffed out, becoming a bright and shiny silver color. Her wide eyes turned yellow gold, and finally her ears traveled to the top of her head, where they became pointed and fuzzy – just like….dog ears.

            Kagome stared, wide eyed. She knew the baby was Inu's from chapter one, but somehow she was still caught offgaurd. 

            Sango grinned and her eyes became large and watery, "Kawaii!"

            Shippou whispered, "Cool…"

            Sumiko hugged Shio's arm and they snickered to each other. ^________^ 

            Inu Yasha looked pale. Oo ;;;;;;;;;;

            Miroku smiled brightly and went to go get a better seat. 

            Shio cleared his throat and looked at Kagome, "If I may reverse it , Miss Mom? ^_^ Congratulations, it's a hanyo!" 


	13. Muwahahahahaha

^_______^ YEP!! Now wasn't that exciting?!? I am up in the happiness bling bling!! ^___^ 

Chapter 12. Muwahahahahaha

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

            Suddenly, the baby, which was no more then a few hours old, sat up and looked around at everyone.

            "OH MY GOD! Look at that!" Kagome shrieked and pointed at the baby. "She's sitting up all by herself! Babies aren't supposed to do that till they're at least six months old!!" 

            "And she's supporting her own neck too!" Miroku said looking surprised and intrigued. 

            The baby gave Kagome a raised eyebrow.

            "_That expression!"__ Kagome shouted. The baby looked at her like she was nuts. "Babies don't make expressions like that till WAY later on!!" _

            "Well that's dog demon puppies for you," Sango smiled. ^_^ "Always surprising you with their amazing strength and abilities!"

            Shio and Sumiko smirked in Inu Yasha's direction. "Right, Inu Yasha?" Sumiko asked.

            Inu Yasha was still in shock. All of a sudden he crawled over and put his face inches away from the baby's. Her golden eyes got wider at his closeness and she blinked.

            "DAH!!" Inu Yasha threw himself against the wall on the opposite side of the room looking at the baby as if she were rabid. 

            The baby laughed and waved her chibbi arms a bit. 

            "Holy hell!!" he shouted looking terrified. "There's just no way!" 

            Shio sighed and went over to his best friend smiling ear to ear. "Inu Yasha, Inu Yasha, Inu Yasha." He placed a hand on his hyperventilating friend's shoulder. "Come on man, I thought you were smarter then that!" ^_^ grinned in a cruel irony then extended a hand in the baby's direction. "I mean really, doesn't that baby look almost exactly like you?"             ^________^ 

            "Yeah! Look at her little ears!" Sango said grinning.

            "And her silver hair!" Shippou pointed at her.

            The baby scowled at them. 

            Inu Yasha couldn't believe it, he stared at the baby as if she was the scariest entity in the universe…(.to some people, she would be…)

            The baby scowled at Shippou and Kirara who danced happily and her nostrils flared slightly. 

            "Well what name are we gonna give her?" Kagome asked.

            Sango grabbed a reddish pink flower out of one of the many gift baskets given to Kagome and set it behind the baby's puppy ear. "How about Blossom?"

            The baby grabbed the flower off of her head and bit the flowering bud off the top violently. She chewed it up with her gums. 

            Sango sweatdropped slightly. "Nevermind." ;;;

            "How about Angel?" Miroku suggested. He reached out to pat the baby's head. "RAWR!" the baby snapped at his hand, and even though it sounded like a baby growling and she had no teeth anyway, it was kinda intimidating. Miroku backed off too.

            Shippou hid behind Kagome and gulped. "How about Scary?"

            Kagome sweatdropped. ^^ ;;;

            "Ahh….hah – TIEU!!" 

            BLING!

             "What about Kago-Yasha?? The child of Kagome and Inu Yasha!" Eleven year old Sumiko exclaimed. ^_^ 

            Inu Yasha facefaulted forward. 

            "Or maybe Inu-Ome." Shio winked at her. ^_~

            "Inu Onna."

            Everyone looked at Inu Yasha who sat crosslegged with his back to them. 

            Kagome was surprised. Inu Yasha suggested a name for the baby. After a few seconds, she looked down at the baby. "Well what do you think, baby? Do you want to be called Inu Onna?" 

            The baby looked up at her, then at everyone else….then she fell backwards hitting her head on the floor. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

            "Oh my god!!" Kagome freaked out. Everyone lunged forward to see if she was okay. 

            Whether that was a no or a yes, it became her new name. 

            Inu Onna sat on her forelegs and forearms like a puppy resting. Her little dog ears twitched as she looked around. Then she looked up at Kagome with puppy dog eyes and smacked her lips together.

            Kagome didn't see her, she was a few feet away reading about how to use cloth diapers since they were the only one's she had on such short notice. 

            The baby's lips thinned then she yipped.

            Kagome looked down at her and Inu Onna smacked her lips together again. She didn't like to repeat herself. 

            "Oh my, are you hungry, Inu Onna?" Kagome asked. She set down the book and crawled over to the baby. The baby looked up at her with big watery eyes_. "Da ya!"_ she exclaimed.

            "Okay, hold on." Kagome said. She picked up the baby book. "Sango? Do you know anything about breast feeding?" she called to her.

            Everyone with a male ear in twenty feet caught the word "breast".

            Sango came over, took the book from her and flipped through the pages without even looking at the index or corner numbers. "I'll find the chapter, you open your shirt."

            "Kay." Kagome said, she had barely pinched two buttons open when she realized Miroku, Shio, Kirara, Naraku, Sumiko, Shippou, and Inu Yasha were now in front of her watching. She sweatdropped. "What are doing here?" she asked slightly nervous. 

            "Oh, well I'm here for learning experience." Miroku said. He was good at faking an honest face. "I've never actually seen a woman breast feeding before, if I learn now, I can teach the future mother of my child."

            Kagome glared at him. Apparently she didn't trust him as far as she could throw him. She frowned at everyone else. "And what are your excuses?"

            "I'm here to make sure you do it right." Shio said with an honest face that was a little bit more believable then Miroku's. 

            She looked at Inu Yasha who suddenly blushed and said quickly. "I-I'm just here to make sure these two don't do anything perverted. Otherwise I wouldn't be here!" he looked aside blushing madly.

            Shio rolled his eyes and shoved him a bit. 

            "Sumiko's curious." The little girl said.

            "I'm curious too." Shippou nodded.

            Kirara mewed and shrugged. 

            Naraku was torn between wanting to glare at Miroku for his "learning curiosity" look, and wanting to glare at Sumiko for being his slave master. 

            Sango glared at them before looking to Kagome. "Well, what do you want to do?" she asked.

            Kagome looked down at Inu Onna who didn't even notice everyone else, but she looked like she was on the verge of tears. Her bottom lip trembled, her little fists where tucked under her chin, and her eyes where large and watery. 

            Kagome sighed and lifted Inu Onna into her lap. What? If she didn't do it, she would be starving her baby. She didn't want Inu Onna to cry either. She unbuttoned the rest of her shirt. At least she remembered to wear a nice bra. 

            "Okay, uh…." Sango looked over the page. "Crap! What do these words mean Kagome? There are words in here I've never heard in my life!"

            Kagome figured she wouldn't have understood it. But she didn't want to embarrass Sango. "I'll read it." She smiled politely. 

            Sango handed her the book. 

            Scanning over the lines a couple times, Kagome figured out what to do. She took a deep breath and looked down at Inu Onna. She thought that if she pretended they weren't there, it would be easier. She sat Inu Onna up closer to her then popped out one of her breasts. 

            There came a gasp of 'ooh's and 'ah's. Inu Onna readily accepted her meal and instinctively put her mouth over the nipple. 

            Inu Yasha looked at Miroku and filled with a sudden unexplainable rage. "What the hell are you looking at, Monk?!?"

            Miroku looked up at him surprised. "Me? Well I-"

            Inu Yasha grabbed Miroku's head and knocked it against Shippou's.

            BONK!

            Miroku collapsed backwards, Shippou whined, _"What did I do?!"_

            Inu Yasha grabbed Shippou's head and banged it against Shio's. 

            Shio and Shippou both cussed. 

            "Shut up!" Kagome suddenly shouted. "I can't do this with you monkey boys arguing in the backround!!" 

            "Hey!" Sumiko suddenly stood up. "Chocolate Monkey Man is the original monkey boy!" she pointed at the little monkey who took no interest in what was going on. 

            "Sumiko, shut them up." Kagome said plainly.

            "Kay, Nice lady!" ^_^ Sumiko smiled and pulled a big roll of duct tape out of the front of her kimono. 

~~~*flashback*~~~

            Shinyo walked through the forest. It was such a lovely day, a lovely summer day in fact. The time of the year where light magic was in good supply, it was. She suddenly paused looking straight ahead. She held her wooden staff out in front of her and closed her eyes. The wind blew past her, making the leaves in the high branches of trees russle and make a low hissing sound. 

            She opened her eyes and went left. She found a dead tree with snow settled on the branches where leaves used to be the day before. Just that tree and nothing else was cold and covered in snow. On one of the branches, the little boy Yukidaruma hugged his knees to his chest in his sleep and nodded his head forward. A very insecure child he was.

            Shinyo, twirled her staff once and bluntly struck the neck of the staff against the trunk. All of the snow was shaken off of the tree and so was the boy. He would have fallen out, had he not grabbed onto the branch as soon as the shock woke him up. He hung from the branch with one leg and two arms while the other one dangled and he panted as if he had just run a marathon.

            "You're reflexes are good, but with training from your other professor, you could learn how to not be startled at all." 

            Huffing and puffing, Yukidaruma looked down at her as if she were a Kodiak bear. 

            Shin'you just smiled up at him and turned to walk away. "Come now. Lessons cannot start without you, and Sashimasu Sensei does not like to be kept waiting." 

            Yukidaruma nodded and whispered, "Yeah." He slowly climbed down and followed her to a grassy knoll near a babbling brook. It looked like a Zen garden. 

            "This is my garden." Shin'yo told him. "You will come here every morning before the sun rises unless either of us specifies otherwise. The whole time she explained the rules, she kept a gentle hand on his shoulder and a sweet smile on her face and in her eyes. 

            The places he was aloud to walk on had clean white tiles. The rest of the ground was raked sand and silt. Shin'yo told him that he could not tread on the sand and silt until she told him that he could. 

            On the opposite side of the garden, Sashimasu waited for them, dressed in her silver armor. Next to her stood a little girl who looked exactly like a younger version of the dog demon woman. Spikey silver hair, fair skin, large blue eyes, and a red and white fighting uniform and kimono. The little girl's eyes lit up when she saw them coming. 

            Shin'yo paused a few feet away from her friend and the little girl. Yukidaruma was so nervous he almost tripped himself to stop at the right time. 

            The little girl giggled making him even more nervous and shy. He tried to hide behind Shin'yo, but she somehow didn't let him. In fact she was almost behind him. She looked down at the little girl. "Sashimi, this is Yukidaruma. He will be learning how to use the light with you."

            Sashimi's eyes became larger and brighter as she smiled at him. He blushed deeply. She was smiling at him as if he had rescued her kitten from a high tree branch. He looked away embarrassed. Girls made him nervous. 

            Sashimasu grinned at Shin'yo who smiled right back. Suddenly Shin'yo pushed him forward. He stopped in front of her, he was about a head or so taller, yet she made him so nervous. His skinny knees trembled and his face felt hot. He looked off to the side through half lidded eyes. 

            Sashimasu and Shin'yo went to go get the baskets of crystals, candles and coins. Sashimi watched him in an almost fascinated way as he who was much taller and boyish acted as afraid as she was around spiders. 

            "Hi!" her sudden high pitched voice made him flinch. "My name is Sashimi!" she extended her hand. "What's your name?"

            As soon as he turned to look at her the rest of him began to tremble too. "I-I-I'm Yu-yu-yu-"

            "Yuyuyu?" Sashimi asked. "That's a funny name!"

            "N-no, my name i-is Yu-kidaru-ruma."

            "Yukidaruma." She recited, rocking back and forth on her feet.

            He looked down at her feet. From the shin down, she had feet like a canine's. 

            She looked down at where he was looking. "Yeah, those are my feet!" ^_^ she smiled brightly at him. 

            He looked away blushing again. 

            Sashimi looked at him confused. "What's wrong, Yuki-san?" she asked. 

            "Yuki-san?" he blushed even deeper. 

            "Yeah! ^_^ I made up a nickname for you! Isn't it cute?" 

            "Uh, yeah." He nodded still blushing. 

            "I like nicknames." She said putting her hands behind the back of her head and looked off into the garden. "My momma said I'm aloud to give nicknames as long as they're not mean."

            He glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes. "Really? I-is my nickname mean?" 

            She shook her head. "No. I only give mean nicknames to mean people." She smiled brightly and leaned toward him making him lean back, wide eyed. "But you're sweet, Yuki-san!" ^__^ 

            "Sashimi?" Sashimasu called. "Could you give us a hand with some of these baskets?" 

            "Okie, Momma!" she skipped over.

            "You too, Yukidaruma!" Sashimasu waved him over. "Come in and join the fun!" 

            He nodded giving a whispered "okay" and went over to help. _sweet__? _

~~~ (end flashback)~~~ ^_~*

            Miroku sat on the side of a hill near the edge of town, just sitting and enjoying the sound of the wind. Sumiko came waddling past, searching the grass as if she were looking for a missing gold ball. 

            "Lose something, Sumiko-sama?" he asked.

            "No," she put her hands on her hips and looked around at the horizon like she would see one out there. Then she looked at him and said, "Sumiko is looking for Vitolitto."

            Miroku blinked and said nothing. He had no idea what a Vitolitto looked like or what it did at all. "What does it look like?" he asked.

            She made several hand movements to demonstrate several measurements then said, "It's bigger then a bread box."

            "A what?" he asked. 

            "Nevermind. Sumiko has to find it on her own." She sank to her knees and began to part patches of grass like unruly green hairs. 

            Miroku sighed. Why did Scorpiogal's original characters always have to be so strange and confusing?

            (AN: I still ask myself that question…luckily, I have yet to find an answer. ^_^)

            "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

            "Holy shit-taki mushrooms." Miroku made a U turn. He'd rather look for Vitolitto with Sumiko then face the hellish wrath of-

            "FREEZE MR.!" 

            He froze. "Ah-haha! Sango!" ^__^ ;;; he grinned nervously. 

            "Where the hell have you been!! You're supposed to be helping Kagome take care of the baby just like the rest of us!" Sango came over with her hair up under a decorative clip.

            "Inu Yasha's not helping!" Shippou complained as he came back from the spring with an armful of clean glasses that Kagome had him wash. 

            "That's because Inu Yasha is an idiot!" Sango said to him, she turned back on Miroku. "You were supposed to go to the market to get more cloth diapers! Where are they?"

            "Well….ehehehe….you see Sango, there was this beautiful young women who had six children…." 

            "She can get her own freakin' diapers! She has more connections to illegitimate father's then she does servants!" Sango said. 

            "Are you okay, Miss Sango?" Miroku asked. "You seem a bit…tense…" 

            "No kidding." She sighed exasperatedly and sank to her knees on the ground. "I need a drink….seriously….a Mellow Yellow sounds pretty good right about now."    

            "Well how about this," Miroku said, "I'll get you a soda from Kagome's bag, then I'll go get the cloth diapers."

            "She brought them with her??" Sango asked in shock. 

            "She has them, she's just not drinking them." Miroku winked. 

            Sango blushed and frowned. That wink told her that there was some sick ulterior motive behind this. "What do you want in return?" 

            Miroku looked at her innocently. "Hm? Whatever do you mean, Sango?"

            She sweatdropped. "You want something right?"

            Miroku grinned, Oh Sango, you always know what I want!" ^_^ 

            She blushed. "This conversation is over." She shifted to stand up but felt a tug on her hair. "OW!" 

            "What??" he asked. 

            "My hair is-" she reached up and touched the spot where the clip in her hair had snagged on the front of his priest robe. "Shit." She tried to pull them apart but it only made her hair hurt worse. 

            "What the -?! How did that happen?" Miroku asked trying to help her. 

            "I don't know! You're robe attacked my clip!" 

            "I think it's your clip that attacked my robe, Miss Sango."

            "Just get it off!" 

            Shio came walking up the path and froze midstep staring straight ahead. There was Miroku standing in the path, with his knees bent a bit and his hands in Sango's hair and Sango on her knees in front of him and her hands up near her face.

            "Whoa, that kicks the crud out of my most dangerous sex places!" he said and completed his mid-step as he walked over to them. "I never thought of you two doing this sort of thing in public."

            "Huh?" Miroku looked over his shoulder at him.

            "What?" Sango asked.

            Shio saw the expressions on their faces and said, "Oh so you're not playing 'Find the Rangoon Filling'?"

            Sango gasped in horror and shouted, "You perverted Bozo! My freaking hairclip is stuck on him!" 

            Shio knelt next to her and asked, "Well how did you get down there in the first place?" 

            "I sat down from exhaustion!"

            "In the middle of the path?"

            Sango tried to drop kick his legs but he sprang out of the way. 

            "Calm down, Babe! All I did was ask a question!" he went over to her and unclipped it from her hair. "See? It's that easy." 

            Sango rubbed the sore spot on her head and blushed lightly, frowning at him. "Aren't you supposed to be doing something Shio? Like maybe showing off your bright colors in order to attract a mate?" 

            "Oh now I remember! I came to get Preistman." Shio said, totally ignoring her comment. 

            "What for?" she asked.

            "It's a 'guy thing.'" Shio said and began to walk off. 

            Miroku followed without caring why. It was anything to get out of chores and being yelled at by Sango. He got one last dirty look from Sango before going to catch up with him. "What is it, Shio?" he asked.

            "Love lessons time, remember?" he asked.

            "Oh yes! I remember now!" ^_^ Miroku smiled like a kid at his birthday party. 

-

            About seven miles away from the village, there was a little pond. The reflection in the water showed the sky which was blue with whisps of gray floating by, and along the edges were the reflections of leaves in treebranches high above. The reflection of a samuri stood over the pond  and looked down at it. The samuri pushed the loose strands of hair back under the shell of the helmet, straightened the chest plate, and turned around. 

            On the ground, a guy was roped, hogtied and gagged in his boxers. The samuri struck a small pose and asked, "What do you think? It looked good on you, but I'm somewhat of a summer."

            The guy made a muffled sound behind the cloth around his mouth.

            "Yeah, I guess I'll need your horse too then." The samuri picking up the two green sacks lying in the grass and saddled them up to the real samuri's brown horse. Then the samuri turned to the guy, tipped their helmet and said, "Thanks for the gear, dude!" the samuri winked.

            The guy made another muffled noise and struggled. 

            "Oh by the way," the samuri went back over to him and unrolled a wanted poster in front of his face. It had a bright picture of Shio on it offering a huge reward. "Have you seen this man?"

            He gave the samuri a confused look. 

            With a sigh, the poster was rolled up and stuffed back inside the armor. "Fine then, I'm out of here." The samuri climbed onto the horse and galloped away.

-

            "Will I learn how to-?"

            "Maybe."

            "Will I learn how to-?"

            "Maybe." 

            "Will I learn how to-?"

            "Maybe."

            "How do you even know what I'm going to ask?" Miroku asked.

            "You're about to ask me a question about sex." Shio said, having gone over this for the fourteenth time. "I've explained how I'm going to do this many times, I want you to listen this time, okay?"

-

-

            "Do you understand it now?" Shio asked.

            "Yes." Miroku nodded.

            "Okay, good." Shio relaxed.

            "No wait…no I don't." Miroku said looking confused again. 

            Shio sighed and leaned forward with his head and arms hanging loosely in front of him. ;;; (AN: a very nice view actually…)

            "I don't understand it! Are you trying to tell me there's a difference between love and sex?? I don't get it!!" @_@

            "Alright, I'll try to explain it again. Try to pay very close attention." 

            "I am paying attention! But the more you explain it to me, the more I get lost!" ;;;

            Suddenly a girl came galloping up the path on a white horse. 

            "Who's that?" Miroku asked and he & Shio turned to see who it was. 

            She was young with long black hair and a heart shaped face. At a guess, one would think she was older then she actually was, which was 14. She wore makeup to make herself look older and prettier. She also wore expensive robes with pictures of butterflies on a cornflower blue backround. 

            She stopped her horse on the path, reered it and giggled. She looked at them with a glittering smile. "Do either of you know a guy with the name Shio?"

            "At your service ma'dam." He turned away from Miroku and gave an elegant bow. 

            The girl grinned , slid off her horse from her side saddle position and stood smiling at him excitedly. "Oh…my…god! You are like so hot!" she chimed. 

            "Why yes! ^_^ Yes I am!" he smiled back at her and stood up straight. "How may I be of service my lovely princess?" 

            She brought her hand to her mouth and giggled again. "Uh yeah! By like dating me you can, Cutiepie!" she pulled out a piece of paper and held it up in front of him. It was the personal written by Kagome. 

            He took it from her and skimmed through it. He jerked his head back and sweatdropped. "_Erk__?!" _

            That wasn't what he said to write!

            "So now I'm here!" She took the personnel back and folded it into fours. "I'm young, I'm beautiful, and I'm filthy stinking rich!!" ^__^

            He smiled at her and sweat dropped. "Really?" ;;;

            "Yeah!" ^___^

            "Holla!" 

            Another girl came up to them. By the way she walked and dressed, it was obvious that she was a prostitute. Her skin was light tan and she spoke with a Cuban/French accent. "Do you know Shio?"

            "That's me." Shio glanced over his shoulder and his eyes popped. "_Holla__, Senorita!" he turned to face her. _

            She gave him a white, toothy grin. "I came to get to know you." She held up a personal. The one that Inu Yasha wrote.

            "Uh, Shio?" Miroku asked looking in another direction.

            Shio turned around and they saw three girls coming up the hill toward them. One girl was dressed like a big game hunter, she held up Sango's personal. The second girl had wild hair, freckles, and country clothes. She held up Shippou's personal. The third girl had her hair in a purple bow and wore a lavender yuttuka. She held up Miroku's personal.          

            "Uh…" Shio sweatdropped. 

            Miroku looked excited. 

            Then a female cat demon dropped out of a tree and held up Kirara's personal. Shio took it from her and looked at it. "What does this say?" he asked. 

            "It says," the cat demon started, "Aka Shio, age 17, fox demon enchanter, looking for a tall, attractive woman who is as beautiful as he is." She stated basically the same things that were written on the others. Shio looked down at the paper, which had one paw print in the center of it. He looked up at the cat demoness, then down at the paper, then back up at her, "_What?"_


	14. Don't Trust the Milk

_Disclaimer_

_(Scene of a grassy knoll and the wooden frame of a shed.__ Kagome's standing, holding a tool box in front of her with a bright smile on her face. Standing next to her is Inu Yasha dressed like a construction worker with light blue jeans, sleeveless beige shirt, construction hat, belt, and workers gloves. He has his arms folded and a scowl on his face.)_

_Kagome: (continues to smile at the readers but says to Inu Yasha) Go on dog boy, say it._

_Inu__ Yasha: (grumbles) Why am I the construction worker?_

_Kagome: You should be glad to be the construction worker, he's the lead singer! _

_Inu__ Yasha: Kouga and Jakotsu get guns with their costumes, Shio get's a bow and arrow, Sesshomaru gets a bigger gun, and Miroku has a motorcycle. _

_Kagome: So?  
  
_

_Inu__ Yasha: I have a hammer. -_-_

_Kagome: What's wrong with that?  
  
_

_Inu__ Yasha: A hammer isn't cool!_

_Kagome: Sure it is!_

_Inu__ Yasha: How in hell is a construction worker sexy or cool in any way?!_

_Kagome: You're fine, okay? You get to construction on things and shout things at pretty women when they pass by! _

_Inu__ Yasha: Sounds like Miroku should have been the construction worker. -_-_

_Kagome: If you really don't like it, you can trade later._

_Inu__ Yasha: Good._

_Kagome: Are you going to say it now?_

_Inu__ Yasha: Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha: the story itself and me. _

_Kagome: There now, was that so hard?_

_Inu__ Yasha: No, but I thought you were going to make me say something else._

_Kagome: Huh? Oh yeah! I almost forgot about that! ^_^ Say that one!!_

_Inu__ Yasha: No way!! __

_Kagome: Please!_

_Inu__ Yasha: No! *scowls and looks away* _

_Kagome: Fine then. *looks away calmly* No more sex._

_Inu__ Yasha: *Eyes widen slightly then twirls hammer. He holds it in the air and smirks at the readers* Mind if I work on you?  
  
_

_Kagome: ^__^ There! That was very nice._

_Inu__ Yasha: *blushes and folds his arms* Well?_

_Kagome: Well what?_

_Inu__ Yasha: *doesn't look her in the eye but continues to blush* That thing with the no more-_

_Kagome: Oh that? Too late. You had to have done it the first time I asked._

_Inu__ Yasha: WHAT?!_

_Kagome: ^_^ Happy readings ya'll!! _

_--------------------------------------------------_

Chapter 13. Don't Trust the Milk

-------------------------------------------------

            _'I'm a father! I'm a father! I'm a father!' Inu Yasha's mind chanted these words over and over again and wouldn't stop. _

            The baby woke up again for the third time that hour and cried loudly. Kagome came over exhaustedly. She lifted the baby up off the mat and cradled her softly. "No, please baby, don't cry."

            Inu Yasha looked at the ground as if he would find the answers there. _'How could this have happened?'_

_[{"Yes!" "Oh!" "Yes!" "Oh!"}]_

            Inu Yasha sweatdropped and his eyes narrowed. _'Well yeah, but that's not what I meant…' ;_;;;;;;;

            "Sango?? Where are the diapers?!" Kagome shouted.

            "They're not dry yet!" Sango shouted back.

            "Well neither is Inu Onna!" ;;; Kagome shouted. 

            _'How could this have happened to me? I don't sleep around…Shio sleeps around…why isn't he the father of an illegitimate child? It doesn't seem fair….' _

"Somebody go get some diapers quickly!" Kagome shouted desperately.

            "Where the hell did Miroku go?? He was supposed to go get some!" Sango shouted angrily. 

            '_So what does this mean now? I don't know what to do.'_

All of a sudden, Kagome came up behind him and kicked his butt so hard he lifted off the floor. He got up holding his backside and glared at her. "What the hell is your problem!?!"  
            Sango grabbed the front of his kimono and shook him. "LISTEN PAL, I KNOW YOU DON'T FEEL COMPELLED TO HELP, BUT WE NEED THOSE JACKASS FRIENDS OF YOURS!! GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND GO GET MIROKU!!!" 

            "Shit, Sango!! Go get 'em yourself!" he shouted back. 

            They threw him outside the hut and he skidded across the dirt on his face. When he stopped, he just kind of sat for a few moments with his tuckus in the air and his face planted in the dirt. 

            Sumiko came walking by looking for her Vitolitto. She saw Inu Yasha and went around to look at him. She put her face level near his, got in the same position he was in and asked, "What'cha doin', Mr. Puppy?"

            He pulled himself up out of the dirt, lookin' mighty troubled. "Nuthin." He growled. He got up and started to stomp off. 

            Sumiko skipped after him like a ballet dancer. Naraku sat on her head holding onto her hair so that he wouldn't fall off. 

            Instead of doing what he was told, Inu Yasha went and sat on the little hill Miroku was sitting on earlier. He sat in his meditation pose and closed his eyes. Sumiko did a jeté behind him and made an Ed – like sound. (AN: You know Ed - from cowboy bebop…)

            She did a twirl and struck a ballerina pose. Then she relaxed, and leaned forward with her hands behind her back. Naraku was careless and fell off of her head into the grass, giving a loud squeak with impact.  "Is puppy tired?" she asked.

            "No." he said with his eyes still closed.

            "Puppy looks tired." She said sitting down across from him and looking up at him.

            "I'm not tired." He said calmly. 

            Sumiko tilted her head to the side. "Well, Sumiko was talking about puppies thoughts. Puppy seems unhappy."

            This made Inu Yasha sigh, signifying that she was correct. 

            "Tell Sumiko." She said, grabbing Naraku and forcing him to sit in her lap. 

            Oddly enough, he actually wanted to talk about it with her. Maybe it was her mysterious ways, or her odd view of life, but whatever it was, Inu Yasha felt like she would somehow understand him or be able to help him. "Why me?" he asked.

            "Why you what?" she asked.

            "Why is Inu Onna _my daughter? Why was she born _now_? I mean if this had happened at a time where I wasn't so confused or in the middle of trying to figure out what I'm going to do about the future, I might have been ready! What am I going to do? I don't know what to do about Kikyo or Kagome…who am I supposed to choose? Die for Kikyo, or raise a baby I never had a choice about? What's right? Is making one of them unhappy inevitable? I'm so confused."_

            Sumiko looked upward, silently mouthing something to herself. 

            Inu Yasha sweat dropped, realizing he gave her too many questions at once. 

             She got up and walked away whispering to herself. 

            After a few seconds, Inu Yasha flopped backward into the grass. "Feh….So much for help…" he grumbled. 

-

            Shio took a deep breath and rubbed the palms of his hands together looking over the line of girls in front of him. "Well, well, well'y, well, well…" 

            Each one smiled at him. 

            Miroku grinned too. If Shio didn't want one of them, he would be prepared to fumble the ball. (AN: _What???)_

            "Well," Shio said again with a sweat drop. "I believe you all know me, though I never caught your names." He nodded. "Names are good. Why don't we start with names?"

            The rich girl who came in first chimed, "My name is Daigakuimo, (AN: Roughly translated as "Sugared Sweet Potato") but my sisters call me Daiga for short." 

            The Columbian Prostitute flipped her long black hair back over her shoulder and said in heavy accent, "I am Manjyu. (AN: Means "Steamed Cake") I do a lot of traveling, but my family lives far, far away from here." 

            The hunter had lightly tanned skin, she was obviously the outdoorsy type. She had smooth skin and a graceful neck, and oval eyes. "My name is Taiyaki. (AN: Her name is the same as a food called "Carp shaped cake") I guide lost travelers and hunt for sport."

            There was the country girl, who had fluffy light brown hair, and a lot of freckles on her face and neck that were the same color. The weird thing was, this made her look very attractive. "My name is Pai (AN: Just means "Pie"). My family and I grow, distill and sell our own sake."

            The girl who wore a lavender dress and a bow in her hair looked at him with large innocent brown eyes. "My name is Nikkei. (AN: Translates to "cinnamon"..does that tell you if she's really innocent or not?) She held up her arms to hug him. Shio stepped forward and hugged her. All of a sudden, her hand which was on his back moved down.

            Sfx- *bike horn*

            Shio jolted in shock and looked at her in amazement. She winked, blew him a kiss and went to go stand with the other girls…who glared at her threateningly. 

            The last girl was the cat demon. She stuck out her hand and said, "Matatabi." ^_^ (AN: means "catnip")

            Instinctively, he took her hand and kissed it. "And what makes you so unique Miss Matatabi?" 

            She smiled and giggled behind a catlike grin. "I'll say that I am to your liking…it is up to you to figure out how I work."

            He smiled at her as she joined the other girls. "Well," Shio said placing his hands behind his back. "I….never really planned for _this to happen." _

            Just then Sumiko came walking up. "Oh cool!" she ran over and shook the hands of the girls. "This is so cool! ^_^ Hi! Sumiko I am! Shio-sama's lil' sister!" 

            The girls went 'ooh' and 'aww' at her cuteness. 

            "Well, Sumiko, Now what?" Shio asked smiling at all of the girls. 

            She turned to him excitedly. "Don't 'cha know, Kitty-chan?? You've gotta spend time with each of them, fall in love with one of them, then ask the one you love to be your mate!" 

            Shio smiled nervously at her then at the girls who all smiled at him. ^_____^ 

~*~*~*~*~

             Inu Onna lay on her stomach with her elbows and knees bent. She was gumming a teething ring making puppy-like growling sounds. "Hrrrrr hrrr hrrr…arf..hrrr…"

            Kagome came in and set a glass of milk on the floor next to Shippou who watched the baby from a safe distance. He looked at the milk then up at Kagome confused, "Kagome, I thought you were going to breast feed Inu Onna!" 

            "I was, but-" she looked over at the baby. 

            Inu Onna growled and popped open one of the gel bubbles of the teething ring with her gums. 

            "I just decided to subtly move her on the bottle." ;;; Kagome looked back at Shippou. 

            Shippou nodded but still looked confused. 

            "I'm back!" Miroku walked in carrying a bundle of cloth diapers. 

            "Too late, Miroku." Kagome gave him a flat glare. 

            "Yeah, Sango already went out to get some since you took so long." Shippou stated. 

            "Oh." Miroku sweatdropped and set the diapers on the floor. "Sorry about that. Where is Sango?" 

            "She's outside. I told her to take a break." Kagome said glaring at him more noticeably. "After all, _she_ has done so much work around here, I figured she deserved it."

            That was enough to kind of make him look nervous and guilty as he left the hut. 

            _Stupid jerk._ Kagome glared at the door he had left through. _Blowing off helping Sango like that. Why do guys have to be so noncommittal?_

            "Kagome?" 

            "Yes, Shippou?" 

            "Why can't Inu Onna crawl yet?"

            "Oh Shippou, it'll be a very long time before she can crawl." Kagome said. She went over to her backpack and pulled out four boxes of ramen and a couple cans of soda. Then she stood up and said, "I'll be right back, Shippou! Watch Inu Onna okay?"

            "Okay, Kagome!" he said and she went outside. 

            Inu Onna made another growling sound, biting the hell out of her teething ring, when suddenly she noticed that there was a lack of mother in the hut. She looked around then glared at Shippou as if it were his fault that Kagome was gone. 

            He sweatdropped and blinked.

            "_Eh!" Inu Onna chucked the teething ring as hard as she could and hit Shippou in the face. Now you gotta remember that dog demon puppies are stronger then normal babies. The plastic toy hit him in the face so hard he fell backwards with swirly eyes. _

            Inu Onna then proceeded to whine and whimper, and would do so till her mommy came back. Inu Yasha, who was walking past the hut, heard her and thought to himself, '_Where's Kagome?_'

            He walked inside the hut and sat down against the wall. Inu Onna saw him and her whimpering started to lessen as she stared at him and his dog ears. 

            Inu Yasha looked over at Shippou who was lying on his back twitching. The dog boy raised his eyebrow, 'feh'ed and closed his eyes irritatedly. "Moron." He muttered. 

            Inu Onna started sucking on her knuckles since she didn't have the teething ring anymore. Inu Yasha looked down at her and she looked up at him with wide little golden eyes of interest. 

            "What are you looking at?" he asked.

            "She made a noise with her lips still clamped over her knuckles that sounded like, "_buwa__."_

            Inu Yasha eyed all of the food laid out on the floor: Beef ramen, Original style, teriyaki brand, a box of pokey, VagetaBeta, Lemon Water, Rayjia, and a cup of milk. 

             Kagome walked up to the front door of the hut, having no success in finding Inu Yasha whatsoever. She pushed passed the mat hanging in the doorway and froze in horror. Inu Yasha was sitting on the floor, drinking from the cup of milk she had set there. At the sound of her chocking gasp he glanced up at. "What?" he went back to drinking.

            She practically screamed out at the wrongness. "_INU YASHA!__ THAT'S BREAST MILK!!!" _

_            Right as she said the word "milk", _his eyes popped and he sprayed out all of the milk that was in his mouth. He started gagging and scaping his tongue with his fingernails. "_GAK!__ Why didn't you tell me wench?!?!"_

            Inu Onna squealed with laughter. 

            "WELL I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE COMING IN HERE, I WAS LOOKING FOR YOU ANYWAY!!" 

            Inu Yasha made a gagging sound and staggered outside. Kagome followed him. Inu Onna watched them leave and blinked in confusion. 

            Without even realizing that she left her alone in the hut with Shippou (who didn't count because he had been knocked out by a chew toy), Kagome followed him only a few steps away from the hut where he squatted down and started yanking clumps of grass out of the ground and shoving them into his mouth. 

            She cringed at the sight but had to get out what she wanted to say. "Inu Yasha, I want you to watch the baby while I'm gone!" she said assertively. 

            "Wha??" he frowned up at her with a mouth full of grass. Of course the frowning was mostly there because of the horrible taste of grass. "Hell no! I'm not taking care of no puppy!" 

            "Inu Yasha, get over it. It's your baby, It's my baby. Deal!" she said. 

            "If you didn't notice, I'm in the middle of a mid life crisis here!!!" he shouted. 

            Right as Sango came over, Inu Yasha crawled away and got sick behind a tree. 

            "Ew!" she flaired her nostrils in disgust then turned to Kagome who was equally grossed out. "Kagome?"

            "I have never seen a guy," Kagome started shaking her head with pity, "Who was so afraid of commitment." 

            Sango hung her head in ahmen until they heard Shio's voice, "Dude! What happen to you?!" 

            Kagome sweatdropped nervously, "I stand corrected."

            Shio was back from wherever he was, and standing with a group of strange yet pretty young women. 

            "Crap," Kagome groaned. "Maybe I shouldn't leave yet."

            "Noooo…go ahead, Kagome! Get what you need, we'll be here watching the baby." Then she frowned in all of the guy's direction. "At least _I will."_

            "Thank you Sango." Kagome smiled at her thankfully and walked past Inu Yasha who was lying on the ground with swirly eyes just like Shippou. He had little dog bones flying in circles around his head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ho boy, now you're in for it! ^______^ 

Guess what? I went online on the morning of the 26th, and saw four new reviews for the last chapter. I read them and came across a very interesting review which had been written by a soul named RedHerring: "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
*wipes a tear from eye* oh man, wow. That was halarious... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! i want to know where you get your inspiration, some of this stuff is so random.  
Anyways, update sooner than you did! ^~^"

*Laughs like doctor LaQuack*

Okie doke! ^___________^ Let us see….

How did I get the inspiration for Shio's character?

Can you say, "Dude, where's my car??" ^___________^ 

Any knowledge I display about babies, was taken and warped from the World Book Encyclopedia 2001. ^_^ Yes…warped to fit my needs…..

The way I write, is mostly the way I talk in real life…if you hear maniacal laughter, or a bunch of big words used in compound sentences….yeah, it's all me ^_^… *nodding like a beatnick*

With Inu Onna being able to sit up and support her neck and stuff like that, I figured that when she turned half demon like her daddy (her daddy ^____^) that she would be stronger then a normal baby and stuff like that…she will show a lot of suprising differences to normal children as the story progresses…or you can just go read "Problem Child"…^___^

Inu Onna's voice by the way….when and if I write about her as a little girl, she will have the voice of Lilo from Lilo and Stitch or that little girl from Spirited Away…which ever one you are more comfortable imagining….and when and if I write about her as a teenager, she will have the voice of Videl from Dragonball Z. ^__^ I like to think about this kind of stuff….

Most of the comedy I developed over a certain span of time. I just woke up one day and said to myself, "Hey! I like reading comedies and short stories…why don't I learn how to make jokes up on the spot and write stories that are to the point. (That's how they started out anyway…then I started to learn things like symbolism and such…)

Anything else, I get from T.V. and music. ^_^ T.V. made me do it….

That's right mom….I'm a mish-mash….I'm a hogde podge of ideas! ^ - ^V


	15. A Whale of a Tale

[Disclaimer]  
  
[Scorpiogal drops from the sky dressed as The Silent Nun of Doom and stands in a fighters stance. She is surrounded by the Stressor Monsters of Evil in an autumn field. There are about sixteen of them.]  
  
Scorpiogal: To those of you readers who have been nice about waiting for the next story, I'm sorry this chapter is late.  
  
(One of the SME is in the form of a thirteen year old boy dressed in overalls. He holds up a shot gun and points it at her)  
  
SME Huck Fin: Git' of yer butt, Scorpio! Ye'w got a Jernal assignment and a comparison paper due after break! (fires his gun at her)  
  
Scorpiogal: (bends backward matrix style and the bullets fly over her in slow motion.) For those of you who have been getting all grumpy, mean, and stupid about it, F*ck you.  
  
Three metallic monkey shaped SME's: (come out of no where and jump on her) Buy presents for you family! Buy presents before it's too late!!  
  
Scorpiogal: (Struggles to throw them off of her) I didn't cause my stress, and if anyone tells me to hurry up with the next chapter again, I will literally bite their heads off.In other news, I don't own Inu Yasha, and that's not new.  
  
-  
  
Chapter 14. A Whale of a Tale  
  
Waking up and feeling a sharp pain in his pointed nose, Shippou sat up straight in a daze. He rubbed his nose impulsively which only made it hurt worse. He cringed and looked at his hand to see if any blood came off. Luckily, there was none... It only felt hot like blood.  
He frowned at Inu Onna who was laying on her stomach, facing him and looking not very happy.  
"Jeeze Inu Onna, that hurt!" he said rubbing his nose. "Why do you have to be so violent?!" he scolded her.  
Inu Onna glared back at him and said nothing.  
"I mean before you were born, I thought you were going to be a sweet, friendly baby who could do more then cry and lay around in her own drool! Not to mention I was hoping for a boy!"  
Inu Onna glared back at him and said nothing.  
"-Someone I could be friends with, someone who would be the smallest and weakest of the group like me - who would share secrets and pull pranks on Inu Yasha with me. but no! You're mean, and you smell, and you're impulsive, and not very nice! - Just like Inu Yasha!"  
There!  
He said it!  
And he felt pretty good about it too.  
Suddenly Inu Onna's bottom lip began to tremble. Her eyes welled up with tears and she bowed her head whimpering softly.  
Shippou's anger faded quickly and he gave her a concerned look of worry. "Gee, I-I'm sorry!" he stood up and took one step toward her holding out his hand. "I never wanted to make you sad, it's just that -"  
Inu Onna's eyes flashed angrily. She looked up at him murderously and growled.  
"Whaa?!" Shippou sweatdropped and backed against the wall cautiously. Even though Kagome said herself that Inu Onna wouldn't be crawling for a long time, she was still a very scary child.  
Then she did something that truly horrified him. With a small groan, she pulled her arms into position and put the palms of her hands against the hardwood floor. She raised her upper body off the ground and found her balance on her chibbi knees and hands. Shippou trembled.  
Inu Onna growled threateningly, baring her gums.  
  
88888888  
  
Kagome climbed out of the well in her own time and dropped her backpack wearily. Having a baby really took it out of a teenage time traveling school girl mother. (AN: How many of those are there? Oo)  
So while she was here, she had to get some more food for her friends - and some future baby food that Inu Onna would be needing soon. Also plastic diapers with sides you could tape or Velcro together - anything to get rid of those stupid cloth diapers. And maybe some toys - some toys to keep Inu Onna occupied..  
"Kagome!"  
She looked up to see that she was already in front of her house. Her mama stood in the doorway holding the door open for her. "Come inside, Kagome before you catch cold." ^_^  
Kagome looked up at her smiling, trusting face until her vision blurred with tears.  
  
888888888  
  
The samuri (from one of the previous chapters) got down off the horse that was "borrowed without intention of returning". (AN: I prefer the term "stolen"..) The samuri and the horse stood in front of a temple, which many other travelers had recommended as a good resting place. 'Supposed to have good pancakes or something.  
"Hey there-"  
"-Mr. Samuri."  
The samuri turned and almost jumped out of the stolen armor as two young women, who were obviously prostitutes, approached. The samuri gave them wary looks, "Good evening, ladies. What would a couple of girls like you be doing by a temple like this?" ;;;  
The prostitutes giggled behind their sleeves then gave the samuri seductive glances. "Time of war are pretty lonely, huh?" one of them asked.  
"Uh."  
"Per'aps we could be of some assistance?" the second one who had a higher pitched voice asked.  
"Oh well, no thank you, I'm doing quite well on my own." The samuri gave a polite laugh to show how okay everything was. But the prostitutes continued to smile suggestively.  
The samuri sweatdropped nervously.  
Then all of a sudden, the prostitutes started to advance and one of them smiled eerily. "Trust us! We know what we're doing!"  
"-And we're so good at it!" the other one said.  
"No, I'm serious! I don't want any-"  
One came up from behind and the other in the front.  
"Stop, I mean it! Now leave me alone!"  
The one from behind was attempting to massage the samuri's neck while petting loose hairs sticking out of the back of the helmet. While the samuri tried to get her to stop, the one in front suddenly moved in and licked the samuri's bare cheek.  
The poor samuri's eyes popped and so pushed the one in front off harshly. "Ew! Gross!"   
Tired of games, the samuri grabbed the arm of the prostitute from behind and flipped her into her partner.  
After the shock and pain ended, they helped each other up, giving the samuri pissed and confused frowns. "What is wrong with you??" one of them asked. "All the other samuri would do anything for five minutes with us! How can you just say no!?"  
"Like this," the samuri stated smartly, "Noooo."  
"Freak." The second one said, and they helped each other as they began to limp off.  
"Oh, wait!" the samuri suddenly shouted.  
They turned back to look as the samuri ran up to them.  
"What do you want?" they asked as if the samuri was the one that bothered them.  
"I forgot to ask," the scroll with Shio's picture and reward price was drawn from the samuri's armor again. "Have either of you seen this man?"  
Upon seeing the picture, both prostitutes blushed deeply and giggled amongst themselves.  
The samuri looked at them confused. "Huh? What is it?"  
"Why yes we have seen him!" the second one said jovially.  
"You have!? Have you seen him recently??" the samuri asked.  
"No, it's been a long time since he was here," one of them started. Then the other one finished her by saying, "But his stay was quite pleasant!" =^_^=  
Then they both burst into happy, girly laughter. The samuri blinked, watching them for a few seconds before slowly edging away.  
Jumping on the brown horse that was "borrowed", the samuri patted the horses head and said, "You know what horsy, you need a name." The samuri looked upward for a few moments before smiling and whispering in the pony's ear. "I think I'll name you after a character in a fairytale I heard once a while ago." The samuri stroked the horse's uncut mane. "I'll call you Kikyo!" ^__^  
And with that in mind, they galloped away.  
  
-  
  
RIP!  
Sumiko folded up the rombus shaped scap of paper and deposited it into an empty box of Kleenex. The box she had "borrowed with no intention of returning" from Kagome.  
"O~okay!" she exclaimed and posed triumphantly. Shio sat on the other side of the Kleenex box looking a bit ill. The girls sat on their knees in a square formation, watching the little kitsune/puppy girl.  
Sumiko smiled brightly at them all then announced rather loudly "To be fair to all recipients, we will do this the democrabic way!" ^___^  
All of the girls looked at Sumiko with confusion.  
"Democratic?" Shio corrected her and sighed. "Sumiko, I doubt that these girls even know what democratic means." ;;; -.-  
Sumiko sweatdropped looked at him aghast. "Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs. Robinson?!"  
Shio: O o ?;;;  
The personal girls: Oo ?!  
Sumiko: ^_^ "Continuing now!" she pulled a dry-erase marker chartboard out from behind her boulder of infinity items. "Sumiko will pick out names from the shoe box without looking and put them in order on the board!"  
Shio asked, "I thought it was a Kleenex bo-"  
"THIS will determine.the order in which each of you will go on a separate date with Shio!"  
The girls suddenly became more interested and smiled at Sumiko.  
"Wow! You're so smart, Sumiko-chan!" Nikkei the cinnamon girl exclaimed.  
Sumiko grinned a catlike grin and gave her the peace sign. "Hai!" ^_^V  
Shio sighed again and rested his chin on the palm of his hand. Usually, this sort of thing would have more then mildly interesting to him. The thought itself that he HAD to find a mate took away his concentration and confidence in the matter all together. He was such a teenager, really...  
KA-POW!  
Shio's head twisted in a way he never thought possible as the white board, metal stand and all, connected with the side of his skull. If he were human, Shio would have lost his head. The bored bounced off and into the air, as if he used a special elastic shampoo.  
Sadly, Shio did not use a special elastic shampoo, and he ended up with whiplash and one of those concussions were the injured person gets the horrible knuckle cracking pain when they could have had the unconsciousness and the internal bleeding.  
The girls all crowded around him worriedly. Sumiko hovered over him with large watery eyes crying, "OMG! I'M SO SORRY KITTY!! IT SLIPPED FROM MY HANDS!!!" T___T  
  
OoOoOoOoOoOo;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;  
  
"Now let's see, where did Grandpa put the tea bags?" Mama asked herself out loud. She opened the door to the pantry and stuck her head in. Kagome sat at the kitchen table trying to think of what she would say when her mother asked her about Inu Yasha. She couldn't lie to her mother. For one thing, the woman was so frickn' hard to lie to because she seemed so trusting and kind. And another thing, she didn't want to hurt Mama anymore then she already thought she did. Kagome knew that it must have been hard to have a daughter, who always disappeared with a strange boy to a strange place she couldn't go to, only to come back pregnant one day. Even though Kagome had known this woman all her life, she was still a mystery to her. "There they are!" Mama pulled the box of tea bags out of the freezer. "I wonder how they got in there." Her mama had assumed Inu Yasha was willing to be the father. What would she do when she found out the truth though? That Inu Yasha was still too stubborn and cowardly to admit he was wrong and step in to do the right thing this time. "Be right back," Kagome quickly stood up and walked around the table.  
"Where are you going?" Kagome's Mama asked.  
"Bathroom." Was Kagome's response.  
"Okay, but hurry back dear, the water's almost ready!" Mama chimed. ^_^  
Souta came inside from playing and took off his shoes on the stairs. When he saw Kagome he ran up to her looking around for you-know-who. "Hey Kagome! Where's Inu-MPH!"  
Kagome grabbed him and clamped her hand over his mouth. She looked back at Mama nervously, but the woman was busy stirring rice. (AN: Oh god.rice sounds SO good right now..I love rice..especially buttered white rice..buttered like movie theater popcorn..=P)  
Kagome dragged him over to the hallway and stashed the body in the coat closet. Then she looked around for witnesses, sighed in relief, and heard her grandpa scream, "BWAH!"  
THUMP!  
Kagome ran over to the stairs and Grandpa sat up on them rubbing his shins. He picked up Souta's shoes and called with a pained tone in his voice, "Souta, you left your shoes on the stairs again!" T_T He limped past her to the livingroom.  
When Kagome came back from the bathroom, her mother set a teacup and saucer down in front of Kagome's place and her own. She dropped a tea bag in each porcelain cup and ran back to the whistling kettle.  
Kagome had to take a deep breath in order to get herself to go sit down. Mama stood next to her and carefully poured the hot water into the cup so that it wouldn't splash or all fall out in a tidal wave.  
Kagome dunked the teabag up and down to shake the particles out of it and the water turned dark. She wanted it strong. In fact she left her tea bag in much longer then Mama did.  
Mama watched innocently as Kagome flinch and almost gag on her tea. "You've got to blow on it first, Kagome." She said warningly, bringing her own cup to her lips. "I thought you didn't like your tea strong."  
Kagome fanned her tongue. Nothing like third degree burns to make visiting home all the more enjoyable. "I don't like it..but I want it to be strong."  
Her mother looked upward, trying to understand, then finally taking a loud, long sip of her tea. This meant that she hadn't a clue. "So Kagome, how's-"  
"Hedoesn'twannabethefather!!" Kagome squinted her eyes shut.  
"Huh?" Mama gave her a skeptical look.  
"Inu Yasha doesn't want to be the father of my baby." Kagome said looking at Mama guiltily. "Isn't that what you were going to ask about.  
Mama blinked and set her cup down bewildered. "Well I was about to ask you how the baby was, but that question is somewhat important too I guess." ;;;  
Kagome face-faulted off of her chair.  
"By the way, when are you going to show me my grandchild?!" Mama frowned impatiently.  
"Mama, I haven't gotten a bit of sleep!" Kagome pulled herself into her chair. "She cries all the time! And Inu Onna seems to have a very violent personal-"  
"INU ONNA!" ^__________^ her mother shrieked joyfully. "She must be so kawaii!!"  
Kagome sweatdropped. This wasn't the type of reaction she would have expected at all. T_T  
Maybe that was a good thing..maybe.  
"Mama, aren't you mad?" Kagome asked.  
"About what?" Mama asked calmly sipping her tea.  
"Well," Kagome started, but Mama started talking again.  
"I have a beautiful daughter, who's got her good health and is very beautiful. ^__^" Mama smiled at Kagome. "You know, most women after pregnancy gain weight or become very irritable, but Kagome, you're even more beautiful then before. I didn't even know if that was possible till now!"  
Kagome blushed a tad bit. "Uh, thank you-"  
"And Inu Yasha," Mama started. "He's a good boy."  
Kagome looked up at her in disbelief. Did she not hear her the first time she told her?! Or maybe when she told her, her mama went insane!  
"Don't worry, Kagome." Mama winked at her. "Things will turn out right in the end."  
Kagome wasn't so optimistic. "How do you know?"  
"Well for one, I've never had a need to doubt Inu Yasha in the past. I believe he'll do the right thing eventually.just as soon as the shock wears off." ^__^ She took another sip and her grin widdened. "Besides! Scorpiogal like never writes stories with sad endings!" ^___^  
Kagome facefaulted again.  
(AN: When you've got a person's fate depending on me, you really should be afraid.)  
  
-  
  
(AN: I swear.Kagome's mom is one of the coolest anime moms. ^_______^)  
  
-  
  
*******~~~(flashback!)~~~~(again!)~~~~~***********  
  
"Concentrate. Relax your mind and focus on your elements." Shin'yo told her students. They sat in a little circle in their meditation poses on the ivory tiles of Shin'yo's zen garden. Almost a year had passed, and they had not learned much at all about how to use the light. About 80% of the time was spent with sessions of yoga and meditation. Then they learned how to completely relax their bodies and minds at will. They learned how to direct attention on one thing and one thing only, and how to block their thoughts from hackers.  
These things had helped Yukidaruma a lot. For one, he was a bit more relaxed around his master and Sashimi, unless that simply came to him by routine. They had lessons every day. At first they left him whimpering with a migrane by the end of the night. Eventually the headaches stopped though. In fact, he stopped getting headaches completely. That might have been part of the lessons, too. He still found himself a little bit uneasy around Sashimi in a way he had trouble describing. When she was around his heart would race, causing him to be a bit jumpy and hyper. Shin'yo called that "Fight of Flight", whatever that was.  
Sashimasu was nearby doing some advanced form of movements for whatever her fighting preference was. It seemed quite difficult, but after a while of watching, one could see patterns and repeating stances. She finished off her form and looked over at them. Sashimi and Yukidaruma were sitting with their legs spread out at ninety degree angles and they slouched somewhat in their relaxation. But they kept their heads up facing the sky and their eyes closed. Sashimi focusing on silver, and Yukidaruma focusing on ice. Shinyo had pulled her legs into a comfortable position sometime after the children closed their eyes and sat filing her nails. Sashimasu couldn't help but chuckle.  
'And just what are you laughing about?' Shin'yo's voice echoed in her mind.  
'Nothing. Just how good of a teacher you are.' Sashimasu smirked and walked toward Shin'yo's back.  
'What? They don't need me for this part.' Shin'yo shrugged and continued to file her nails calmly.  
Sashimasu sat down with her back to Shin'yo's and smiled up at the puffy white clouds floating just over head. 'I think Shicho will be proposing to me any day now.' ^__^  
'Well he should.' Shin'yo glanced at the shape of her nails quickly. 'You've taught him how to fight and bared his child. It's the least he can do.'  
Sashimasu giggled again. 'I know!' ^_^  
'That reminds me, before he does propose to you, I have to meet him! If you don't introduce him to me, I'll cry..'  
'Haha, yeah right. That 'I'm gonna cry thing' stopped working on me years ago!' =P  
'Sashimasu. T_T'  
'Alright fine, I'll introduce him to you, but later, okay?' ^_^  
'Don't forget now.'  
Sashimasu stood up and began to walk toward the temple steps.  
Shin'yo reached out and tapped the children on their foreheads. This was their single to stop concentrating on the voices in their heads and pay attention to Shin'yo's voice.  
"Guess what time it is, students!" She smiled brightly.  
"Hammer time!" Sashimi thrust her fists into the air. ^____^  
"Uh..noon?" Yukidaruma guessed.  
"That's right! ^_^ It's high time that you kids learned about the light!" Shin'yo said.  
"YAY!" Sashimi cheered with her fists still in the air.  
"Awesome!" Yukidaruma was as happy as a kid in a candy store.  
"Alright, now are you sure that you kids are well meditated?" She asked cautiously.  
"Hai!" They both answered at the same time and nodded.  
"Because the light is not an easy thing to learn. Beginners should handle at their own risk. For the last time, are you both really ready?"  
"Hai!" Sashimi shouted like a soldier in rank...a very giddy and ragtag soldier..  
Was Yukidaruma ready? He felt like he has been ready his entire life! He nodded determinedly. "Hai!"  
"Alright then," she moved to sit on her front legs and her two apprentices mimicked her action. She paused for effect mostly but then she started to speak in her soothing voice. "As you may or may not know, the universe is controlled by two forces mostly - light and darkness. Until recently, they have been uncontrollable matters that make life flow the way they want it too. But they aren't ungodly powers for nothing, an absolute of either is impossible to achieve."  
Yukidaruma was already confused. He was able to follow her sciency explanation up until that last sentence. Was she saying that the light had a weakness?  
"Too much of darkness can kill a person. The same goes for having too much of light." She then added after seeing the nervous look on Yukidaruma's face, "But luckily, that's only if they are holding 100% light or darkness and letting it overflow." She picked up her staff which sat neck to her and she stood it up straight. "Even now I have trouble creating "pure light". I may never since I'm a demon, but I don't like to think negatively." She winked at them. "Pure light is the name Sashimasu and I gave this power. I ask you if your ready because it's not completely finished making it highly unstable and could easily kill you or cause you to go insane if awakened."  
Yukidaruma was starting to look pale and nervous again.  
"Though," She emphasized on that first word for the point she was about to make. "I have absolute faith in the two of you. From the moment I first met each of you, I could tell that you had the inner strength to not get hurt when using it."  
  
-  
  
"AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!" Shippou ran around the tiny hut in circles, screaming, "SHE'S GONNA EAT ME! SHE'S GONNA EAT ME! SHE'S GONNA EAT ME! AAAAHHH!!!" And Inu Onna was after him like a shot! Don't let her inexperience fool you, she was pretty fast for a baby!  
Shippou kept running but he heard her puppy-like snarls right behind him! oO  
Soon Inu Yasha came stumbling into the hut. He was somewhat in a daze from throwing up. After a few moments of sitting in the corner and waiting for the colored spots floating around his vision to leave the room, he noticed Shippou running around and Inu Onna chasing him. He raised an eyebrow and made himself comfortable. "Oi, Shippou! What did you do this time?"  
Suddenly on that exact lap around the room, Shippou ran and jumped on Inu Yasha's head and screamed into the dog boy's ears, "She's gonna eat me!!"  
Well we all know how delicate and fragile his doggy ears are. Shippou yelling into them just made him more nauseous and dizzy then the grass did! Inu Onna came around and leapt clear over Inu Yasha's head, biting Shippou's head on the way, and carrying him over with her. They rolled around on the floor, Shippou screaming and helpless as if he were a victim of a bear attack. Inu Yasha fell backwards holding his ears in pain going into a very small trembling seizer.  
Inu Onna clamped her gums over the left side of his face and gave a growl that came out muffled. Shippou screamed as she started biting his head, his arms his legs, his tail.  
Then after a moment of screaming he realized he wasn't being attacked anymore. He opened his eyes. Miroku had come in and pulled her off of the tiny kit. Inu Onna struggled to get free, holding her was about as easy as holding a wet fish. He had to sit down in order to hold her right.  
"Are you okay Shippou?" Sango asked. She had come in there sometime too.  
They looked over at Inu Yasha who was sulking in the corner. "Inu Yasha, what happened??" Sango asked.  
"What??" he looked back at her and shouted louder then he needed to.  
"I asked you what happened!!?" she shouted back.  
"WHAT???" he shrugged. "I CAN'T HEAR YOU! SOMEONE STOP RINGING THATGOD DAMNED BELL!!"  
Inu Onna howled without warning and bit Miroku's arm.  
"OW!" he let go of her quickly and she scampered away. He pulled back his sleeve and looked at a small bubble of blood grow from a needle hole puncture. He gasped and so did Sango. They looked up at Inu Onna. She growled baring her gums again. There was one slight difference though. Near the front of her jaw, was a small incisor tooth. Shippou's face went a tad bit blue with fear and Miroku and Sango began to back away slowly.  
Inu Onna growled and charged toward them, sending everyone into a run.  
  
-  
  
"Hey, Kagome!" Yumi exclaimed happily. ^_^  
"Long time no see!" Eki hugged her.  
She had been gone for so long, and they missed her so much!  
"It's great to see you guys!" Kagome exclaimed.  
Expectantly the first question they asked her was, "Was you baby delivered alright?"  
"Yeah, she's a pretty healthy baby." Considering the baby was born on a hardwood floor in an ancient mansion in medieval times.  
"It's a she!" Eki cooed happily. "You're going to have to show her off to us someday!"  
Kagome gave a fake laugh. She could just picture herself walking down the street with Inu Onna in a stroller.  
  
-  
  
"Arf! Grrrrrr..Arf, arf, arf!"  
Well, it had finally come down to this. Everyone sat on the roof of Kaede's hut. The only place where it seemed Inu Onna couldn't get them. Inu Onna made laps around the outside of the hut until a mote appeared there, she also would stop to stand up against the side of the hut and growl at her pathetic targets.  
Miroku looked down at her then suddenly pointed and shouted, "Bad Inu Onna! Down! Sit!" Sango shook her head. "Forget about it Houshi, that pup will wait us out and nothing will stop her."  
"You think so negatively, Miss Sango." Miroku said ever so calmly. "She'll tire out eventually, and when she does, we'll just tap her on the nose and put her to bed."  
"I seriously doubt it will be that easy." Sango said. She watched as Inu Onna made another lap around the hut. "How many times has she done that??"  
Shippou watched the puppy nervously. "I lost count a long time ago." ;;;  
  
-  
  
Kagome took a quick look out the window before stuffing the last thing she needed into her pack. "It's getting late, I have to get back and hope Inu Onna isn't suffering from child abuse."  
Her family looked up at her then Mama came over with her hands behind her back. "Wait, Kagome,"  
"Yes, Mama?"  
"Would you like to stay here for tonight?"  
"But Mama-"  
"I know you want to get back to your baby," her Mama winked at her and brought a present out from behind her back. "But all mothers need a break once in a while."  
Kagome gasped and accepted the gift. "Wow, what's this for?"  
"It's a late baby shower gift." Mama said.  
Kagome opened the gift. The first thing she saw inside caused her to burst into hysterical laughter. There was no way her mom could have actually bought this at any baby store. Inside was a hand-knit pink baby hat with little glovelike ear pockets sticking up on top. "Oh mom, what if the baby ended up not having dog ears what would you have done then?!" ^___^  
"Well it would still look cute on the baby's head. They really do make hats like this!"  
Kagome thanked her and turned around to see Souta. "Hi Souta, did you unplug yourself from your videogames?"  
Souta rolled his eyes and handed her a gift bag. "I got this for my puppy niece."  
Inside Souta's gift was A doll, a box of animal cookies, and a rope chewtoy.  
"Kagome, you can use these also." Her grandpa held up a few charms. "To protect your baby from wandering spirits." And we all know how helpful grandpa's spells are.  
  
-  
  
Sumiko sat on top of a log playing with her berry spells. She took three boysenberries and turned them into Inu Yasha, Miroku, Shippou, and Shio and she giggled as she watched them do their rendition of the barbershop quartet. Then she saw Miroku and Sango out of the corner of her eye. She looked up at them. "Hi nice people!" she said. "When the song's over, Sumiko can make the berries into a nice pie for you!" ^_^  
The berries stopped singing when they heard her say this. They all exchanged worried glances.  
"Sumiko, do you know where Inu Onna is? She stopped chasing us a long time ago and we haven't seen her since." Miroku asked the little girl.  
"Hopefully she hasn't bitten anyone." Sango said shooting Miroku a fearful glance.  
"Sumiko doesn't know anything about helping puppy girl hide from the grown-ups." Sumiko said.  
Miroku and Sango sweatdropped.  
A few feet away Shippou and Shio were setting up a trap. (You know, the box lid being held up by a stick with a string tied to the stick to pull it shut.)  
"It's a rabbit trap." Shio said tightening the knot on the stick.  
"A rabbit trap?" Shippou looked confused. "But we're trying to catch Inu Onna! Not rabbits! What was the point of this?"  
"I have no idea." Shio shook his head.  
"Sumiko, please tell us where she is, she needs to take a bath." Sango asked Sumiko. She realized afterwards that she sounded like a mother.  
  
"Puppy girl doesn't want a bath!" Sumiko cried. She grabbed Naraku from his perch atop her hair and began to scratch his back. He actually sat still, purring happily like a kitty with his back arched. Even though she freaked him out, he still thought she was a good backscratcher.  
Finally Miroku gave up trying to coax the answer out of Sumiko and began calling, "Inu Onna! Here girl!" he whistled.  
Soon everyone except for Sumiko and Naraku were calling for the puppy. Sumiko continued to scratch Naraku's back and Naraku sat in lala land. He looked down at the berry people who looked back up at him warily. He scratched his head and the berry people imitated him. Then he reached out, grabbed the berry Shippou and smooshed him into his monkey jaw. Sumiko looked at him slightly wide eyed and sweatdropped as Naraku licked the red berry juice off of his chin.  
Then Shippou stopped calling Inu Onna's name and stuck his finger in his mouth. He had an idea. "Hey guys! I have an idea!"  
Look out everyone! Shippou's contributing! Oo  
"You've got the stage, Meat." Shio said.  
Shippou cleared his throat then called out, "Oh no, we're in danger!" he sounded like he was trying to pretend he was worried. "We're just a helpless group of people. We sure hope that Inu Onna doesn't jump out at us and try to eat us!"  
Suddenly Inu Onna bounded out of a patch of white flowers and charged them like a sabertooth tiger. But instead of them running they captured her using a towel.  
  
-  
  
And so, they had given Inu Onna a bath. Very few had survived. Miroku and Sango's exhausted and motionless bodies were laid out in Kaede's hut. Shippou hovered in the corner rocking back and forth muttering something about soap bubbles.  
Inu Yasha just fell asleep not that he helped or anything. Shio's dates went to go stay in town. Sumiko was heating up a bottle of milk, and that left-  
"Hold still there, puppy." Shio tied the diaper around the babies waste. He didn't know if it was necessarily the correct way it was supposed to be put on her, but it stayed. (He knew more about bringing babies into the world then taking care of them.) Also add the fact that he never really cared to learn how to change a diaper.  
Inu Onna lay on her feather pillow bed crying noisily. She had bed crying and screaming ever since she was caught. The bath was just the most violent part of her fit.  
Gladly Shio was able to stay calm with her the whole time he was with her. One thing he guessed about most children, was that when a parent gets upset, the child get's even more upset. Very sensitive creatures kids are.  
"Let's see, this is the part where Kagome sings you a lullaby right?"  
  
Unfortunatly, Kagome was in her own time and for some strange reason took her singing with her.  
"Lullabies, lullabies..I don't know any lullabies!" he scratched his cheek and looked upward. "Do I even know any songs appropriate for children?" He looked over at Shippou.  
Shippou sat rocking back and forth chattering, "Soap bubbles..piles of them everywhere..." ;;;;;;;;;  
"Hey, Meat!" Shio called.  
Shippou stopped rocking and looked over his shoulder at him.  
"I'm gonna sing Inu Onna a lullaby but I need a couple of things to make it work."  
Shippou stood up and came over, knowing that he was going to play the errand boy. "What do you need?"  
Shio smiled and said, "Get me a couple of sailor outfits and an accordion player!" ^_^  
Shippou sweatdropped. "Uh..I dunno, Shio..an accordion player is kind of hard to get this time at night without making plans ahead of time."  
"Just try to get it meat, if you do you get to dance!"  
"Really???? Oh, cool!!" Shippou scampered out the hut.  
  
-  
  
"Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads,  
  
A whale of a tale or two!  
  
'Bout the flappin' fish and the girls I've loved  
  
On nights like this with the moon above.  
  
A whale of a tale and it's all true  
  
I swear by my tattoo!" The accordion player, who looked like a salty fisherman, sat next to Shio who sat on a stool, dressed in a male sailor outfit playing a ukulele. Miroku and Sango sat up against the wall to listen. Shippou wore a little kids sailor outfit (which made him look like Donald Duck except with pants) and he danced around like a cross between a sailor and a river dancer. "There was Mermaid Minnie," he tapped his foot on the floor twice, "Met her down in Madagaskar - She would kiss me," foot tap, "any time that I would ask her -  
  
Then one evening" tap tap, "her flame of love blew out." He feigned surprise, "Blow me down and pick me up! She swapped me for a trout!" Then Miroku, Sango, Shio and Shippou sang, "Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads, a whale of a tale or two! 'Bout the flappin' fish and the girls I've loved on nights like this with the moon above. A whale of a tale and it's all true, I swear by my tattoo!"  
  
Inu Yasha had woken up a long time ago and sat against the wall watching as well. Shio went back to his solo part. He leaned in and sang, "There was Typhoon Tessie," Shippou rang a ship bell that was next to Inu Yasha. "Met her on the coast of Java. When we kissed I -" Shippou rang the bell again. "- bubbled up like molten lava.  
  
Then she gave me ..the scare of my young life," Shio looked surprised and freaked out. "Blow me down and pick me up! She was the captain's wife!" Miroku and Sango laughed. The same chorus as before sang, "Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads, A whale of a tale or two! 'Bout the flappin' fish and the girls I've loved on nights like this with the moon above. A whale of a tale and it's all true  
  
I swear by my tattoo!" Well Inu Onna had stopped crying. She lay on the feather pillow, eyes wide, with her fist in her mouth. She blinked in confusion. What??  
  
********************************************************  
  
Thirteen pages of Scorpio gold. Happy Kwanza! ^ ^ 


	16. Looking for Love

_[Disclaimer….]_

_[Scorpiogal is sitting on her bed tearing pages out of a magazine and folding them into origami nuns.]_

_Scorpiogal__: Well peeps, my sickness is almost over…but I swear I'm going to kill someone unless the people whose stories I'm following update soon…._

_[All of a sudden, Shio comes into her room, dressed like a tomahawk Indian, complete with the Indian pants, decorative loincloth, shirtless-ness, and feathered headdress.]_

_Scorpiogal__: Well now, don't we look nice._

_Shio__: *comes over to her holding a thick packet of papers* Scorpia, I want to discuss my contract with you…._

_Scorpiogal__: Oo You're contract??? I didn't know you had a contract…._

_Shio__: - - ;;;....I'll ignore that..._

_  
Scorpiogal: like you have a choice – _

_  
Shio: anyway....i want to talk about this article right here....._

_Scorpiogal__: I might be listening…._

_Shio__: For one…_

_Scorpiogal__: No really, how did you get that contract?_

_Shio__: ;__;;; I got it when you created me remember?_

_Scorpiogal__: ^_^ Hmm… *slams her fist down on the hazy fa-shazy button and the screen gets all wavy as it goes to the scene of when Scorpiogal was creating him…*_

_[Scene change to Scorpiogal's mind…be cautious of where you step….]_

_[Scorpiogal looks taller and her eyes look deeper. She is sitting on a floating pillow typing on her laptop in a way similar to washu from tenchi muyo. Behind her is the Portal of Entering Ideas]_

_Scorpiogal__: *typing as fast as a flight scheduler at the airport* hmmmm…..well I'm out of idea's for this story..*smacks the screen where it has the end of the seventh chapter in the story Lead the Way* ;;;;…fudge…..*starts brainstorming,* _

_Lesser Ideas: GYAH!!! *running around trying to find shelter from the monsoon brewing in her cerebral cortex*_

_Random thought one: *A story that Scorpia read a long time ago….it was about Shippou having an older brother….who was cool and had a futuristic way of talking…not the most in depth character but kinda interesting somehow….and he had a crush on Kagome…..*_

_Random thought two: *various bishi's including Kurama, Shippou, Inu Yasha, Sesshomaru, Trunks and so on and  so forth…*_

_Random thought three: "Dude where's my car?" "Dude, where's your car?" "Dude where's my car??" "Dude where's your car??"_

_Scorpiogal__: OO *there's a thunderclap and a bolt of lightening hits the portal and sends energy all around it* _

_[A shadow suddenly grows inside the portal and a half drawn half-nekkie bishi springs out]_

_New character: ^___^ *grabs her floating chair and spins her really fast*_

_Scorpiogal__: @_@ AAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!_

_New character: *wide smile, watches her spin, then suddenly stops her by the shoulders and puts his hands on her legs opening them* ^____________^ mhmhmhmhm!  
  
Scorpiogal: O o *looks freaked out and as a defense, kicks him in the chin - hard*_

_New Character: @-@ ?!?!  
  
Scorpiogal: Jesus Christ....*Deep blush, glares at him*_

_New Character: *shakes his head and he's not dizzy anymore, but he winces as he holds his throbbing chin* OW! Lordy! What's with you!? I was only trying to play with you! _

_Scorpiogal__: Well you're very pretty but I don't want to be played with…_

_New Character: Oo wha?? Why???_

_Scorpiogal__: I'll have you know that I'm saving myself for marriage you sea monkey! _

_New Character: OO *stares at her in disbelief* saving yourself for **marriage???  *long confused pause* I will never understand people like you! @_X**_

_Scorpiogal__: *looks in her little Japanese translation book and finds a name that just fits* Shio._

_[At that moment, a rolled up document appears in Shio's hand]_

_Shio__: *looks at it* ?_

_@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@end flashback_

_Scorpiogal__: =^___^= awwwww…._

_Shio__: I wanted to talk to you about-_

_Scorpiogal__: Save it for later Shio, this disclaimer has already taken up two pages with your freakin' flashback. It's time for the story! _

_Shio__: But-_

_Scorpiogal__: Silencio!!_

_Shio__: Fine! …beotch…*walks off but first says* But you STILL don't own Inu Yasha! *zips away*_

_Scorpiogal__: DAH!! Oh of the reminders!!! _

-----------------------------------------

Chapter 15: Looking for Love

            "Kiiiiittyyyyyy……._Kiiiittyyyyyy…?"_

            Shio's eyes opened slightly and he got his first scare of the day. Sumiko hovered over him, with her face only inches from his and the first thing he saw was her large and deep pupils. He gasped and sat up straight, Sumiko was quick enough to get out of the way before they knocked foreheads.

            "Jesus, Sumiko!" he rubbed his eyes still a bit freaked out. "It's way too early for that!" 

            "Nuh-uh!" she pointed at a cartoon watch she painted on her wrist with what looked like some permanent black ink. "You mean it's way too late." 

            Shio's eyes grew wide suddenly. He grabbed her wrist and pulled the tattoo about an inch in front of his eyes. "What the hell did you do to your wrist?" he asked almost calmly. 

            "It's a Rolex." She replied calmly. 

            He looked up at her. "This isn't that poisonous stuff is it? Also what do you mean it's way too late." 

            "Kitty has six minutes before his first date starts, 'member?" she asked him. 

            "What??!" he jumped up and ran to look outside at the sun. "Shit, Sumiko!! Why didn't you wake me up earlier?!?!" 

            "Sumiko was giving Chocolate Monkey Man a bath." She pointed at the violated primate sitting in the corner of the room. "Sumiko thought Kitty would wake up in time." 

            "Crappo." He ran a brush through his hair quickly. Luckily he was hot no matter what he did too his hair. 

(AN: Apparently it's in his ""contract"" to make his hair look hot no matter what….like I would do otherwise ^_~)

            He spritzed some kind of cologne over himself quickly. "I should be able to make this up with my charm and quick thinking." He told Sumiko. He gave her a thumbs up and dashed outside. He ran back in and went over to where Sango and Miroku were dead asleep next to each other. (It probably didn't start out that way) He moved Sango's hand and placed it on Miroku's crotch but neither of them woke up. He ran out of the hut again snickering loudly at his little prank. 

            Just then Inu Yasha woke up. He blinked and looked around. "Where's Shio?"

            "Kitty just left." Sumiko said. She came over and kneeled in front of him. "Want me to brush your hair?" she held up the brush she used on Shio. "I'm really gentle."

            Inu Yasha sweatdropped and stood up. "No thanks…I'm going to go wait for Kagome by the well." Before she could say another word, he was already gone. 

            So Sumiko turned to Naraku with a grin that scared him. "Okay, Chocolate Monkey Man! ^_^ Time for your blow dry!" 

-

            There was a little garden that was owned by a lord somewhere outside of the town. Wanders or Travelers with money sometimes stopped by to eat there and Shio had planned to meet each girl at separate times there. We'll get into detail about the garden…but first…let's meet our first contestant! ^_^

            Princess Daigakuimo. Fourteen years old, and probably the shortest of the personal girls. She had her hair in a style similar to Rin's and she wore a silky dress kimono that only the rich and trendy young women of Japan could afford to wear. She saw Shio come running up to her and gave him a girly grin. He stopped in front of her and bent over a bit panting. "Please excuse my rude entrence, Princess." He said. "I overslep a bit this morning and I wanted to make sure I got here on time while still looking my best for you." 

            "It's okay, and like, don't be so formal! ^_^ My name is Daiga remember?" 

            Good thing she told him. He had been introduced to so many girls at once, he thought her name was Pai! If she hadn't of reminded him he would have gone on calling her Princess throughout the date just to be safe. ;;;

            He laughed cutely and rolled his eyes. "Like, how could could I forget." He said jokingly, and purposely changing his voice so that he sounded like a surfer dude. 

            Daiga laughed too, barely noticing. "Oh my god, you look so hot today! Do you like try to look hotter every day?" she asked .

            He laughed again and said in his new voice. "No, but I can tell you do!" 

            She laughed again and blushed slightly, flattered by his clever compliments. 

            He offered his arm and they went inside together.

            The garden was very beautiful. The trees twisted their trunks with white and pink clusters of leaves and flowers that looked like stratus clouds of white and pink. There was a babbling brook with a bonsai bridge. Shio and Daiga sat on a blanket near the little pond of goldfish. Good thing Sumiko had made reservations for them, or else the might not have gotten such a romantic spot in the garden. There were blankets spread out everywhere for various other picnicers but there was enough space so that they weren't all crammed together like regular restaurants today. Off somewhere someone was playing a -(AN: Oh shit…the oxygen is rushing to my brain @_@...but usually that means I'm in the zone…)- koto in an ensemble with a hayashi flute and tsuzumi drum. 

            Daiga wasn't one to chatter, "-And anyway, I was all like, alone and stuff after Yoshi left me for that other chick, but I got over him quick and I told my friends! I was like, 'You know, it's stupid to like cry about some jerk that won't even treat you like you don't have feelings you know?"

            "Yeah, some guys just don't know how to behave around women." Shio said. An image of Inu Yasha flashed in his mind. 

            "Yeah, but I like got over him easily, you know? He never really was a good boyfriend better to be on your own then have a one sided relationship." She continued.

            "Yeah, I see what you mean…" Shio nodded.

            "But like, I really wasn't alone, you know? I mean I had my friends and it was cool because we like went to dance clubs and went shopping and stuff and I was like having so much fun, I got over him real easily, you know?" 

            "Yeah, well that's goo-"

            "Yeah, freedom is like, really good and everything especially after a stressful relationship, ya know – but after a while you like start to get lonely again you know?" 

            "Yeah, I-"

            "I mean my friends are like really fun and cool and everything, but it's not the same as having a boyfriend, even if it does come with a lot of responsibilities and junk like that-"

            "I-"

            "I mean you can't make out with your girlfriend, and even if you could, I'm not like that-"

            "Whoa-" Oo

            "I mean, like, I'm as straight as much as the next girl, I'm not a homophobe either, I mean I support gay marriages and stuff, just so like they're willing to commit themselves and stuff-"

            "Yeah-"

            "Not that they won't commit themselves, I think gay a gay marriage would probably last longer then a straight one, people of the same sex would probably communicate better, though I don't really know myself-"

            "Well I-"

            "Anyway, when I saw you're personal, I like freaked!" ^_^

            "Hehehehe-" ^ ^ 

            "I mean somehow I knew that whoever wrote that personal was truly okay with themselves and not afraid to be in touch with their feminine side-"

            _"WHA-?!?";;;;;;;_

"I mean most guys are like completely obsessed with demonstrating  and throwing around their masculinity all the time, but really anyone who's that afraid of their emotions will end up with like, an inferiority complex or some junk, but most crappy women influence them to - that's one of the reasons I'm like, glad I'm not a dude- "

"Yeah-" ;;;

"But also I was like really inspired by the fact that you are looking for a nice girl with brains, it truly shows your maturity right there-" ^_^

"Yeah-?"

"Though that's what I hope you mean!" she laughed jokingly. "I'm sorry, it's just that most guys lie about that sort of thing and really only want some nookie-"

"Ah-" Oo ;;;

She sighed loudly before saying, "Of course. I mean if all personals were written in whole honesty, the only thing guys would write for, would be long legs and ass-"

"Er-" ;;;

"Tss, I would say to them – like, I would say, 'Like, helloooo?? Personals are for people who want a bit more then some one night stand, you know-"

"Uh-" ;;;;;

"So I'm like glad to meet you, ya' know? ^_^ You seem like a good honest boy who would never sleep around-" 

"Ahhh-" ;;;;;;;;;

"Oh look!! The food's here!" She looked up and grinned as one of the servants of the lord's garden set a bowl of dumplings on each of their sanbo stands. 

Daiga eagerly picked up her chopsticks and plopped a dumpling into her mouth. After she swallowed it, she smiled at Shio, "I'm sorry, did you have something to say?"

Shio sat there in silence for a few moments with his mouth hanging open before he recovered and said, "Err....no, nevermind. I forgot what I was going to say anyway." ;;;

"Oh." She said, consuming another dumpling. "Well maybe it'll just come to you or something." She smiled affentionately at him as they ate, and boy did he notice. "This is great, really it is. You're as nice as I expected you to be. I was afraid that you would turn out to be a sleeze like a few of my past boyfriends, really." Her eyes glittered softly. "I'm really truly glad to have met you." 

Shio swallowed that dumpling in his mouth like it was a rock. 

She asked, "Are you happy to have met me?" 

Shio nodded and laughed nervously. 

She smiled cutely, tilted her head to the side, and went on with her meal, finally resting her voice box. 

-

            Inu Onna finally woke up. Despite all of the crawling, crying and fussing yesterday,not to mention the fact that her mother wasn't there half of yesterday, she was actually quite energetic for the day ahead. Sorry for the grown-ups.

            She began whimpering, to get the attention of the wiped out adults and such around her. They didn't stir. Maybe she had given them a bit too much of the run around yesterday. That didn't stop her from wanting the attention she needed. She sat up and looked around. Sadly, her mother was still missing. She wanted her mother to be there…that warm formula milk Sumiko had given her the night before wasn't as good as her mother's milk, and the pup would be damned if she was to be made to drink it again. She looked around and it seemed that all of the demons of the group were the only ones up and away. 

            (Well…all of the reasonably strong ones anyway….Shippou was still snoozing like the humans…)

            She didn't care if that weird "lady" with the pony tail and dog tail wasn't there….but her daddy wasn't there, and that made her feel lost and alone amongst strangers. I mean hey, it was bad enough that her mom had been gone for this long, but she was only a baby and need both parents. It would have helped if Sumiko were around, but still, Sumiko wasn't her parents or her sister or anything like that. She had told the baby in the baby's dream that she was going off looking for her "Vitolitto" a while ago and that Kagome would be back soon. 

            Inu Onna sat up and looked around. It was obvious that these people wouldn't be getting up any time soon. She got on her hands and knees and sniffed the ground a bit. At least her father had been around long enough for her to learn his scent. After a few minutes, she found his scent. Then using her mad crawling and tracking skills, she began to follow the scent of her irresponsible father. 

            Anyone else would have just ignored a father like Inu Yasha, or hated him, or written a nasty yet popular rap song about them. Inu Onna didn't understand such complex feelings just yet – to truly know how her father was acting, about his choice, or to actually feel true hate to the donator of a full half of her genes. 

            And the moral of our story is: Beggar's can't be choosers…

            "Hrrrrrrrrrrrrrr….." That's the sound of a low and irritatedly impatient growl that Inu Yasha is able to make in the back of his throat. Time was a slow bitch as he glared down at the dark and still bottom of the well. Drumming his fingers on the edge of the well only seemed to make it go by slower, but he didn't stop doing it. Like Shio's first date, his mind energeticly argued with itself over and over about how Kagome was late and how this sort of thing shouldn't happen and how much of a scolding she would get the minute she came back. 

            He sighed loudly and fell backwards on the grass with his hands above his head in their own willy nilly directions. He looked up at the sky in boredom. And oh how the non-blue shades of the sky made him even more bored. He was just so very, very bored without Kagome there. And for a split second he spaced out just staring at the oh so boring sky. They were done with looking for the jewel shards….and nothing had really happened in a while….(AN: I'm not going to give anything away, but let's just say I'm _veeery_ far ahead in the series…) Maybe he should listen to everyone and start thinking about what to do next. (Just because he had this thought, doesn't mean he was going to comply with everything else he was supposed to do…) He sighed again. At least the thought of being done with the search was somewhat relieving in his stressed out state. It was also refreshing to his boredom too, somehow. 

            Then he realized, this spare time that he was currently having could be used to think thoughts he had never thought before. Yeah! To actually think about possibilities for how he was going to go on in life. He had been telling himself for the longest time that he would die with Kikyo, but now, it sort of seemed contradictory. He already died once with her and she had killed him herself that time, I mean heck, one complex lie by some freak in a baboon pelt, and without any real investigation she goes and punctures him with an arrow! Not much trust is it? He was confused, but at least he was used to it…..(AN: ^_~)…… Anyway, how could he die with Kikyo when she was already dead? Was she dead? She wasn't completely dead per say, but it was awfully close…..she was like the living dead…. Kikyo didn't really act like she wanted to die either. Always finding some elaborate sceme to help herself stay alive. And most good people probably wouldn't sacrifice the souls of many innocent others just so they could live, where's the kindness in that? Kikyo's only alive so that she could experience the sin she never could do when she was alive – or…um…_not the living dead…. While that would turn on a lot of guys such as Shio and Miroku, the only way Inu Yasha could really please Kikyo was by dieing an elaborate and well thought out death. Hmmm….it might be romantic to some people, (AN: *cough cough* Kikyo fans! *cough*), it didn't sound like a very happy ending to a fairytale did it? _

            Wait a minute….Inu Yasha's eyes focused as he focused on the sky and the sounds around him. He felt like he was being watched. Still laying on his back in the grass, he tilted his head back a bit and looked straight upward over his eyebrows. Inu Onna was sitting directly behind his head. She looked back at him with a rather innocent expression, totally different from the murderous look she had displayed the day before. She tilted her head to the side and blinked cutely. 

            Inu Yasha's eyes widened and he sweatdropped. He was so into his thoughts that he never even caught her smell or the sound of the grass crunching when she came up behind his head.

            Suddenly she smiled at him. 

            Inu Yasha stared back silently, not knowing what to do, "……."

            What an adorable smile! Inu Onna chomped down on his dog ears without warning. Only now she had four or five baby teeth coming in, and they weren't that of a herbivore's….. 

            Inu Yasha screamed, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

-

            Shio sat down at the garden with his second date, the Columbian prostitute Manjyu. The date had only started but a few moments ago and already they were holding hands as they sat and waited for their food. At least Shio knew he had a strong physical attraction to this girl. But as he reminded himself in a lesson with Miroku the other day, love is more then lust. 

(SH: Hey, Hey, Hey! I don't _need a reminder…I knew what I was doing all along – I just chose not to do it!)_

  
(SG: Hush, Shio….)

            "So…what do you do for a living?" Shio asked innocently.

            The Columbian Prostitutes lips thinned in slight discomfort. "Si…" she glanced away then looked back up at him truly showing him in her gaze that she didn't wasn't exactly proud of it. "Por vavor…I'm sure that you know exactly what I do for a living." 

            He really did know, too. She dressed like, acted like, and smelled like a prostitute, but to be safe, (because you never know) he decided not to know unless she might have been talking about something else. "I-I'm not sure what you mean, Manjyu." He replied innocently. 

            She looked quite ashamed and she shrugged, "I – actually I kind of quit. Most guys wouldn't want to get into a real relationship with a former um – former…um…"

            Shio leaned toward her a little bit. He gave her a smile that usually made even the most depressed women into a giddy state. She looked at his expression though and bit her lower lip. Her eyes became glittered with unshed tears. She tilted her head forward and put a hand over her mouth as a slight gasping sound escaped her lips. Her nicely shaped eyebrows knitted together and she looked away from him in shame.

            "Hey now! It's really not that bad!" he patted the soft warm hand he was holding. She had nice hands. 

            She made another gasping sound followed by a couple of silent weeping sounds that only they could hear. "It is that bad." She whispered to him. He offered his free arm out for a hug and she leaned into him, still trembling. She gasped again and after a few moments she began to tell him why it was so bad. "It's terrible. I've made a lot of terrible choices Shio." She cried silently. 

            He patted her back, taking a split second looked down her blouse, then continued to comfort her. 

            "A harlot." She whispered.

            "Excuse me?" 

            "I was a harlot." She whimpered softly. "I decided to quit six months ago, but it's like I never stopped!" she paused again for a gasp then began again. "Once you become a prostitute, you become labled for the rest of your life as damaged goods. I feel so bad…" Shio truly felt bad for her, he also felt bad for himself in a way…but at the moment he was more interested in her misery. 

            She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry, I don't want to load my misery on you."

            "No, no, it's okay. I'm here for you. Why do you think you're labled?" he asked gently.

            She sniffed again. "Even after I stopped I can't help but tell the truth." She looked up at him with puffy eyes. "When I was a prostitute, I lied all the time – I lied to my family, I lied to my friends, I lied to elder people, I lied to total strangers! And I didn't like it." 

            Stroking her back led to stroking her hair. She had very soft, nice hair.

            "Then I told myself one day to quit, and just the thought of quiting lifted so much weight off of me!" she smiled slightly before continuing. "And so I worked really hard to stop completely, because even if I wanted to stop, I still need to put bread on the table, and women cannot find as much jobs as men. And I couldn't go home to my family, because they think I'm married to some fine rich noble out in the east." 

            Shio raised his eyebrow but didn't say anything.

            "So, I looked around and told no one what I really was," she continued. "I found a job picking persimmons out in the country, hopefully by then I will have found another job offer…a persimmon picker doesn't make a lot of money, but it's a start."

            "I agree! Definitely!" Shio nodded honestly. 

            "I also went to a temple and a preist baptized me – again. I was baptized once when I was younger, but the people at the temple saved me, and made me a virgin again and took away my sins. I didn't have any money, but they did it anyway, because they said I was the most determined young woman they've ever met and they liked me."

            Well if the preist was anything like Miroku, I'm sure he would have done the same. Shio didn't tell her that though.

            "It made me really happy, but after that whenever I saw a guy that I truly fancied or vise versa, we would go out, but I would have to eventually have to tell them that I was once a prostitute. I didn't want to lie because I was afraid that one lie might lead to a thousand more, and I would end up like I used to be. When they found out they were either disgusted, suspicious, or they thought I was easy. They were suspicious of what I did whenever I wasn't around them, and they wouldn't trust me! They were convinced that I was out screwing some other guy for cash. And some of those guys who learned about it, would think they could get away with touching me where I didn't want to be touched or getting me in bed even if it was by force." She sniffed loudly, Shio's petting was a huge comfort that kept her from sobbing. 

            "Most of them where disgusted though…" she concluded. "I mean a girl who's been around a lot, it's like having a hand me down stained shirt I guess." Telling him this made her go into whispering again so that she wouldn't burst into sobs. 

            Shio sniffed her hair and laid his head against hers sympathetically, "There, there."

            She looked up at him, as he mused silently with his eyes closed. After a few moments she had calmed down. He let go of her in order to get a tissue for her. 

            "Thank you." She blew her nose and looked up at him. "Do I disgust you?" she asked nervously. 

            "What?" he looked at her like she was crazy, "Of course not!" 

            She sniffed and wiped her nose again, an almost grin came over her then faded as she seemed a bit embarrassed for being so emotional and sharing all of that with him when they barely knew each other. "I'm sorry." She apologized.

            "Don't be! You're a great kid, you know that!" he smiled at her and that caused her to smile back. 

            "You sound pretty honest." She commented as she whipped away the remaining tears from her cheeks. What she didn't know was that all that crying had messed up her mascara big time. 

            "I am honest." He replied. "You're a sweet person and you deserve better than what has happened to you." 

            Her eyes glittered, but not with tears of despair. She smiled down at her tissue, which she realized was blackened with her mascara but she didn't care. When she looked back up at him he had a huge grin on his face and he said in an amused voice. "Hey!" ^__^ he leaned toward her a little and said. "I'll tell you a secret," he pushed her hair back behind her right ear, brought his hand up to the side of his mouth and whispered to her. 

            After he told her she gasped and looked at him in disbelief. "You mean – you too??" 

            "Yes, I am in the same boat you're in!" he smiled, showing her that he was an ex prostitute and proud.

            She sat there with her mouth hanging open in total shock for a moment before she smiled and began to laugh loudly and happily. Shio laughed too. He could already tell that if she was his mate, he would be able to share absolutely _anything_ with her! He smiled as the sake they ordered finally made it too their table. He poured her a cup first then one for himself. They eyed each other over the rims of their cups in a lusty manner. Snickering and giggling every few moments as if they both shared a dirty secret. (Which they did! Oo)

            Manjyu grinned at him and asked, "So! How many women have you f*cked! ^_^" (AN: Casual date question…) "If you're keeping count that is…"

            Shio nodded and lowered his cup to his sanbo. "600 oral, 20 "69"s, 40 eatings, 670 doggy style, 4 standing up, 1 three way – with two women by the way, 420 finger jobs, and I'm afraid I lost count on the anal ones." ^_^

            They both laughed loudly together, so that nearby picnickers shot them dirty looks. 

            "And how about you, my sweet steamed cake? ^_^ How many men have you blown?" 

            She laughed at the way he said this and set down her cup. "Okay…I've had 622 orals, 96 "69"s, 60 eatings, 600 doggy style, 10 stand up, 4 three way and 8 five way - with both sexes, 800 BJs, and about 45 anals." She laughed, shrugged and blushed, "What can I say about that last one? I guess I'm easily turned on!!" ^_^ she laughed out loud. 

Shio laughed too, but not as loudly or as long as he had after he told her his status. A little bit in shock, he had never thought that he would actually find a soul besides Inu Yasha who had a higher status then he himself did….To tell you the truth, hehe….it kinda….freaked him out. ;;;;; His laughter became somewhat nervous after a second but he didn't let on his shock, "Haha, that many huh?" ^_^ ;;;;

"Yeah! ^_^ We were such whores!" she laughed again and Shio laughed nervously, but even less then he did before. He could feel the sexual attraction decreasing and the fear and disturbance rising. A girl who had been with 2245 men…hehe….about 490 more sex parners then _he ever had! Haha! ^_^;;;;;;;;;;;;_

^______________________________________________________________^************

Okay, quickly, some things I have to respond to: 

Hyper-Cherryblossom: o.0 you don't stir rice. Me, being an asian i should know. Well anyways, GREAT story! keep going and even though you don't update fast, it's okay i love it anyway!

SG: You don't stir the rice???? How do you cook it?!?! Whenever I make rice I stir it so that the rice doesn't stick and weld itself to the inside of the pot! Oo

dark-spark13: I LOVE THAT SONG HOPE U SAW THE INU MUSICVIDEO 4 IT!!

SG: No I haven't! But if you gave me a link…that would make you my new best friend…


	17. Jeepers Creepers

_[Disclaimer:]_

_[Scorpiogal is walking down the sidewalk with Shio dressed as a tomahawk Indian walking behind her. It's late at night and she made Shio wear a reflector on his feathered headdress so that passing cars won't fly off the road and mangle them horribly]_

_Scorpiogal__: Muwahahahaha – muwahhahahahaha – MUWAHAHHAHAHAHAAA!!!! _

_Shio__: *gives her a funny look* …….;;;;;;;;_

_Scorpiogal__: Hehehehe ^_^ *looks at a piece of paper she's holding and crosses off another name it's a list of her past ex boyfriends who played with her emotions (quite a long list)* Okay Shio, how's the supplies? _

_Shio__: *looks inside a plastic bag he's carrying* Two cans of whipped cream, the steam machine is still working, the strobe light is still working, the sterio is okay, and we have about two thirds of film left. _

_Scorpiogal__: Good! That's all we need…muwahahaha….._

_Shio__: Ah…Scorpia? Can I ask you a question?_

_Scorpiogal__: No, I still don't own Inu Yasha._

_Shio__: No! I'm talking about my contract!! _

_Scorpiogal__: Oo  You're contract??? I didn't know you had a contract……_

_Shio__:  T_T Scorpia, you said you'd listen….._

_Scorpiogal__: I'm just kidding you, Fuzzyface, fire away! _

_Shio__: Groovy, *pulls his "contract" from his large feathered headdress* According to article number 34 C section a., my constitutions clearly state that my actions are there for deceiving natures beyond any other said persons control._

_Scorpiogal__: …….I'm sorry, you lost me around the part about your feathered headdress._

_Shio__: *smacks his contract* What this complicated piece of shit is trying to say is that my whole personality is based on my freedom and uncontrollable libido. In other words, I'm supposed to be a player and the cool funny guy._

_Scorpiogal__: What's your point?_

_Shio__: I don't appreciate being forced into finding a mate. _

_Scorpiogal__: ……*blinks and looks around* And…..that means I should care?_

_Shio__: -  - ;;;; yes!_

_Scorpiogal__: Oh……well I….sort of don't…._

_Shio__: *face fault* ;;;;_

Chapter 16: Jeepers Creepers

            The chibbi little hanyo pup, known as Inu Onna, gurgled with high pitched, happy baby laughter. Watching her father cradle his sensitive witto ears and mumble his unhappiness brought her hysterical fun.  

            Inu Yasha rubbed his ears soothingly. Were they bleeding?? He hoped not…Oh goodness, oh the pain!! T_T Still rubbing his ears between his fingers he turned back to his daughter and glared down at her dangerously.

            Not that he would actually do anything to hurt her physically, even _he_ knew that was sick. "What?" he asked her seriously. "You think that my pain is funny??" he asked as if she could understand or respond properly. 

            Inu Onna pointed and laughed at him again, making happy baby noises. She grabbed her own ears like he was doing and imitated his voice while making little growls and baby sounds. Then she grabbed her toes and fell backwards laughing again. 

            Oh my god, if that weren't the cutest….

            "Don't act all innocent! I'm not your mother!" he said with a sweat drop.

            She growled at him again baring the four or five stubs of teeth she had growing in then laughed all high pitched like. 

            It was amazing how freakishly cute she could act when she wasn't a charging hunting dog of death! I mean wow, Inu Yasha really felt like he was going to get a cavity from her sweetness!! 

            He glared at her warily. He wasn't going to be fooled for a minute. "You think you're so innocent, with your stubby limbs and your five puppy teeth, and your "_vulnerability"…" he said._

            Inu Onna stopped laughing and just stared up at him with her little lips parted a bit. 

            "But I know what you really are," he said all dramatic like. Must have been watching too many episodes of "As the Pale Moon Rotates" with Kagome's mom….

            "You're the evil offspring of doom!" he said. (AN: Reading it is silly enough, try saying it out loud! ;;;;)

            "You may be young and feeble and without motor skills, but you don't know how many problems you've forced on me!! You've changed _everything_!"

            The baby blinked and said nothing. 

            "Instead of looking for Naraku, I'm stuck here because you demand all of Kagome's attention - and then some from everyone else!" 

            The baby blinked and said nothing.

            "Also, because of you, Kagome's all irritable and I know even less about what's wrong with her then before you came along!"

            The baby blinked and said nothing.

            "I'm being made to choose between Kagome and Kikyo, I don't know what to do, and every minute makes me want to rip my own head off!!" 

            There was a small well of drool forming in the baby's parted lips. A droplet of drool hung off the edge of her bottom lip by at least a full inch. 

            Inu Yasha sweat dropped. After a moment he sighed, hung his head, and grumbled. "Dear Kami," he grabbed the edge of the pink baby dress Kagome had put on her and brought it up to wipe the baby's mouth. "You little drool monkey," He said then chuckled at his own joke. 

            The baby looked up at him then put her knuckles in her mouth, wondering what he was laughing at.        

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

            Shio walked up to his third date of the day, Taiyaki the huntress. She wore casual clothes, nothing too fancy like she wanted to keep it casual, but nothing horrible looking. She looked quite pretty in face. She smiled up at him with pretty brown eyes. She wasn't as short as Princess Daiga, but she was still shorter then Shio. She must have been about 16 or so. At least that's what her fine tanned skin told him. 

            They gave each other a quick bow before Shio pointed a thumb out of his shoulder and started to speak, "Do you drink sake? Because I know a little place-"

            "Oh wait! Before you say anything else," Taiyaki interrupted him. "My parents…"

            "What about your parents?" 

            "Well my family, they want to meet you before we go out and everything. I hope you don't mind?" she gave him an apologizing look.

This was different. Shio had never met a girl's parents before. Hmmm…well it was just the girls parents, how bad could it be? "Sure! No problem at all!" he nodded to her and she smiled at him, with a row of bright white teeth. (AN: Yeah! I bet you didn't know how nice people's teeth were back then without crest whitener!)

So they began their walk to Taiyaki's home, which was actually not to far from the garden Shio had planned for them to go in the first place. Would forgetting to call and cancel affect the service of the next date he brought there?

"So what are your parents like?" Shio asked.

"Well," Taiyaki pushed her hair back behind one of her ears, that was when Shio noticed she had little brown freckles around her nose. Very cute. "My dad kind of left me mom and me when I was little."

"Oh." He said, visably putting his foot in his mouth so that she knew he was sorry for asking. 

"It's okay, really," she smiled at him reassuringly. "He wasn't a good person anyway, apparently into illegal opium transports – oh my god! I can't believe I just told you that!" she put her hand over her mouth.

"No problem! I don't care!" Shio laughed. 

"I have a problem with that, always giving too much information and such. Most of the time I don't even realize it and my mom tells me it's dishonorable." 

"I'm totally fine with it, everyone gives too much information once in a while right?" he asked.

"Right." She laughed a little. 

"Well then, how's the rest of your family?" he asked.

"My mom is okay. The same as every other Japanese mom I guess, hehe…"

Shio laughed fakely. "I – wouldn't know actually."

"Oh? Did your parents get divorced or something?" she asked.

            "No, she died a long time ago." 

            "Oh my – I'm sorry now!" 

            Shio laughed again. "You know what? Why don't you just surprise me with your parents or guardians when we get to your house, Savvy?"

            She laughed as well and nodded her agreement. 

            After a few moments or silence, Shio decided it was time to turn up the charm. "Do you go tanning or something? Your skin is just – wow!" 

            She gave a flattered laugh and replied, "It's a free tan – courtesy of my job!" ^_^ 

            "Ah! Really? Because when I first met you I thought, 'Damn! All of her friends must be jealous, man!'"

            She laughed again and the freckles around her nose really showed. She automatically went from cute to gorgeous. 

            "You're very handsome yourself!" she blushed slightly, looking really hot.

            "Yeah," he laughed a little. "I get that a lot."

            She laughed thinking he was being funny. 

            Soon they got to a little village where she lived in a good sized house. It wasn't a mansion, but it wasn't some hut made of cardboard either. A couple of kids a boy and a girl with the same skin as Taiyaki's, presumably her brother and sister saw her and ran over to jump on her and hug her, calling, "Taiyaki's home! Taiyaki's home!"

            Then a short, strong looking middle aged woman, slightly plump with her hair tied back into a bun came fast walking out of their house she ran up to Taiyaki and gave her a warm hug. "Oh Tai, I'm so glad you're home!" she sang happily.

            "I missed you too, mother!" she hugged her back.

            Shio smiled at the cuteness of her family. A tall guy, slightly taller then Shio came out, he had his hair tied into a topknot and he carried a scythe from the field. He came up and slapped Shio on the back. "Hey! Sup, stranger!" he said. He hugged Taiyaki and kissed her on the cheek. "Nice to see you back, Sis!" he said.

            "Thank you, Koi!" she smiled at him. 

            The mother then rounded on Shio. "And who is this pretty young man?" ^_^

            "This is Shio, mom!" Taiyaki smiled up at Shio then back at her family for approval. "I brought him to eat dinner with us, is that okay?"

            "Of course it's okay, sweatheart!" her mother said. "It would be wrong of us not to feed him now that he's here!" She smiled at Shio like he was one of her many children. "Well come on in, Shio! I was just in the middle of making Taiyaki's favorite - grilled fish!"

            "Mmm! I love grilled fish!" the little girl said galloping into the house after the little brother.

            "You love everything!" the little brother laughed. 

            And just because he could, Shio laughed too. It was a freakishly adorable little family, and he loved them already. And Taiyaki secretly could tell that her family already loved him and that caused her to grin as she stepped inside their home. 

            Shio walked through that matt covered door and froze. His insides did a major flip flop as if he had just climbed aboard a descending roller coaster. Inside Taiyaki's home, were the furs and bones and trophies of what Shio guessed was every demon she had ever killed and then some. 

            Probably a family career or something….

            "Come on in, Shio!" Taiyaki saw him standing in the doorway looking around. She went up to him and grabbed his hand to get his attention. He turned his head to look at her quickly.

            "Are you okay?" she asked him a bit concerned. 

            He nodded but didn't say anything, and she led him to go sit with the family. 

            Taiyaki and her family probably knew that anything like bones or fur that comes from demon is dangerous because the demon energy stays in it, and that with time the demonic aura fades out of it. But demons like Shio knew that unless you're a monk or the bone is stored in a monastery, that demon aura isn't going anywhere. There were furs spread out for mats and folded for blankets, trophies were either decorating the walls or hovering in the corner, they had taken bones they found, and either hung them like a decoration in the house, carved them into tiny Buddha statuettes, or sanded into beads that Taiyaki's mother wore around her neck. 

            Oh yeah, they still had their demon energy alright. And even though the humans couldn't feel it, Shio felt his ears humming with their youkai. The hairs of his tail went bottlebrush. He felt kinda sick, and a bit nervous. The numerous youkai trophies whispered amongst themselves in the spirit dimension, moaning or whispering things he couldn't understand because it was muffled by the wind and all of the other things whispering around him. 

            Taiyaki drew him back into the world of the mortal and living. He looked down at her to see her holding his hands in hers and looking up at him worriedly. "Shio, are you sure you're okay? You look a bit green."

            "Huh?" He looked confused for a second, as if he forgot where he was then grinned widely at her and gave a nervous laugh. "No! I think it's just my clothes that are green." He pulled the sides of his pants a little which where in fact as green as his eyes. "No worries, Tai! I'm totally fine!" said with a couple of sweatdrops. 

            She nodded hesitatently, and followed her across the room. He walked across a large salt and pepper brownish-grey fur on the ground and the image of a huge rabbit like demon with glowing eyes being speared, flashed before his eyes. He glanced at the carpet afterwards and could hear it's last cry of pain. Shio sat down next to the little girl and boy who sat crosslegged and looked up at Shio interestedly. He smiled at them as warmly as he could manage under the stress of the youkai, before looking up at a wall decoration. Feathers green like a peacock feather, poked out all around the sides of an ivory plate with a carving of a spring. Another image flashed in front of his eyes of a group of low level demons. It was like a gathering for some sort of odd mating ritual. They were scaly feathered little buggers all of them. About thirty or so flew around each other like a swarm of gnats, their metallic green feathers sparkling in the sunlight. Then a bunch of painful looking arrows shot through the air and they scattered, screaming and scuttling for their lives. One of them was pierced through the heart. Feathers flew everywhere and it screeched a high pitched pterodactyl like sound. 

            Shio winced at the sound and found himself looking down at the kids once more. They didn't seem to find any signs of discomfort on his person at all. Then the little boy pointed up at him and asked, "Are you a demon?"

            Shio nodded to him. "Yeah! I have demon ears and a demon tail and demon powers!" he smiled down at them.

            Normal demon aura wouldn't bother him because, well….because he was a demon! The fact that these were dead, suffering souls of demons might have made them a bit more creepy and disturbing. 

            The little girl asked, "What kind of demon?" 

            "I'm a-" before he could answer the mother came in and said. "The grilled fish is ready! Come and get it!" 

            "Alright! I'm starved!" Taiyaki grinned at Shio. There was something very interesting in that smile. Even though all of those images he got from her home interior were quite disturbing, something about that smile told him that he might just get a **_special dessert_**_ – if_ he stayed….

            They walked into the other room where they had a low and long table, as if they always fed strangers. The table was set with plates and chopsticks laying across each bowl. One large plate of steaming hot fish sat between two large platters of chopped vegetables and teriyaki & broccoli. The whole family came in to sit down. Shio automatically noticed that the wall decorations had continued into this room. The whispers seemed to get louder as he walked closer to them to get to his seat. He heard voices of death in his ear, _Run awaaaaay!_ Get o_ouut__ while yoou sttiill caaaan! __They're muuuurdereerrrrs!_

            Shio sat down next to Taiyaki. Glancing briefly at her he noticed a necklace that reminded him of Inu Yasha a little. It had round fat beads and small sharp teeth going in a pattern of six by one. The image flashed in front of his eyes of a puppy like dog demon running from whoever's eyes he was seeing through in the vision. Then the dog demon pup ran into a dead end where whoever it was had him cornered. The puppy pushed himself into the corner crying for his mommy. He looked at whoever it was with his eyes wide in complete and total horror. Then his chest was slashed wide open. 

            Shio was brought back to reality and found himself in a cold sweat. He gulped and looked around the table were everyone was frozen in whatever they were doing at the time to look up at him in bewilderment. 

            Taiyaki's mom looked at him. "Are you okay, dear boy?"

            Shio nodded. "Uh huh," his voice cracked a bit as he said, "I'm fi~ine." 

            Everyone slowly went back to eating. The little boy leaned close to the little girl and whispered, "Taiyaki's boyfriend is kinda strange." 

            The little girl shrugged and they both went back to eating. 

            Shio looked down at the plate in front of him. The fish was okay. They must have bought it from their local market place or something. He pinched a piece of it off with his chopsticks and ate it. "Wow! This is really good, Mrs. Taiyaki's mom!" 

            She blushed proudly. "Arigato!" -^_^-

            "Yeah, our mom's a really good cook!" Koi the brother nodded to her.

            Shio licked his lips, after all of those images, he wasn't going to let Taiyaki or her family down by not even trying it. The mother got up again to get the tea. Kettle in hand, she went around to each person and poured it for them. Shio smiled and nodded his thanks to her as he reached out to grab his cup. He touched the cup and got another vision. Everything was in black and white in it, he heard children talking. He must have been seeing the vision through someone elses eyes like in the last one. He turned his head and ran toward the sound of the voices. The very children who were sitting across from him at the table came into view. They were wearing clothes for hunting and they were stabbing at a sick and dying fox demon. It was too weak to get away now, and so it cried out in agony as they slowly stabbed him to death with weapons made of bones. Then as he came up to them, the children looked up at him. They were in complete black and white except for their eyes. Yes it was their eyes, that were as red as all the blood he saw in the previous visions. They smiled at him and the little girl held out her hand to him. "Come on Taiyaki! Help us kill it!" 

            "Alright, but then we gotta go home!" her voice answered. The person whose eyes he was seeing through drew a large bloody hunting knife and plunged it into the fox demon's chest as if it were a cooked turkey. 

            Shio came back into reality again. He looked across the table at the children who were ravenously eating the grilled salmon meat in front of them. 

            He looked at the brother who was tearing his salmon meat apart. Then to Taiyaki who looked like she had an orgy in her mouth until she swallowed and took another bite of her fish. Then he turned toward the mother who looked up from her food at him and said concernedly, "Are you alright, young man? You look a bit pale?" 

            With a dizzying feeling, all the oxygen left Shio's brain. His eyes rolled back and he passed out on the floor. 

-

            Inu Yasha sat with his arms folded on the ledge of the well. He leaned his chin over them to look down into the bottom. No Kagome. With a deep sigh he sat back with his eyes closed in meditation pose sadly. There was a slight tug on the back of his kimono that caused him to lean back a little. His eyes opened alertly. _What the-?_

He glanced over his shoulder as a little clawed hand came up and gripped a handful of his haori jacket. Inu Onna's fluffy head popped up and her other arm came up with it to grab more of his jacket. She pulled herself up and sat on his shoulder, then slid off of it into his lap. "Oomph!" she yipped as she landed there. She climbed out and scampered behind him again. She climbed up his back, using his shirt for a ladder, sat on his shoulder, and slid into his lap again. Inu Yasha sweatdropped and gave her a flat annoyed look as she scuttled behind him to do it again. When she landed into his lap for the third time, he grabbed her by the foot and lifted her up by it. She looked at him annoyed but it didn't see to give her pain. "Uwa!" she barked at him. 

            "What do I look like, a slide??" ;;; he growled and set her down gently in the grass. She looked up at him over her shoulder in a girly little pout. All hanyo looks considered, the pout itself reminded him so much of Kagome when she was upset with him. He scowled back at her and they held each other's scowls for a few moments. Inu Onna looked to the side, a bit bored then looked down at his foot. She crawled over to him interestedly. 

            Inu Yasha saw her coming and scooted back a little suspiciously. "What? What are you doing no-"

            She put her hands on each side of his foot and clamped her mouth over his big toe. She didn't bite it, but she sucked on it like a pacifier. 

            "Hey, hey, hey!"  he pulled her off of his foot and held her up in front of him this time by her underarms. She swung her feet back and forth and looked at him with the pout. He just scowled back and said, "I'm not your pacifier either!" 

            "Eweh.." she whined and smacked her lips together. 

            "You're hungry??" he asked. "I'm not you're mom! Do I _look like I can feed you?!" he glanced down at his flat chest then back up at her. He set her down in the grass and she looked down at the grass with puppy dog eyes. She remembered her mommy. Then she winced as her little stomach growled. Inu Yasha's scowl faded a little bit as he watched her. He sighed in annoyance and turned around so that his back faced her. He leaned forward and said, "Okay, climb on." _

            He felt her crawl across his back and cling to his shoulder. He stood up and began to walk toward the village. 

            Inu Onna sat on her hands and feet like a puppy and watched as Inu Yasha dug through the boxes of food Kagome had left behind the day before. He pulled out a box of powdered milk and began trying to read the back of the box. "Let's see….blah blah blah….vi-ta-mins A – D – good source of….with artificial….what IS this CRAP???"

            Inu Onna climbed up on his back again and growled at the box menacingly.

            Inu Yasha glanced at her, "They didn't actually try to feed this to you did they?" ;;;

            Inu Onna yipped and growled at the box again. 

            Inu Yasha watched her then got an idea. He pointed at the box and said, "Bad box! Bad!!" 

            Inu Onna arfed excitedly. 

            Inu Yasha smirked and tossed it across the room. "That'll teach you! You stupid formula crap!" 

            "Meh!" Inu Onna said. She made a raspberry at the box. 

Inu Yasha snickered then said, "Alright then! Let's go find you some _real_ food." 

"Eee!" ^_^ Inu Onna cheered. He stood up and walked outside.


	18. Hamburger and Pai

_[Disclaimer]_

_[Kouga and Ayame are standing in front of a western matinee backdrop that was probably borrowed from Kagome's school. Ayame is dressed as a saloon girl and Kouga as a cowboy.]_

_Ayame__: I feel like a slut. _

_Kouga__: You mean you're not?_

_Ayame__: *whacks him over the head*_

_Kouga__: Owie! _

_Ayame__: Just give the disclaimer, Cheeseball._

_Kouga__: Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha. And he deffinately does not own Kagome._

_Ayame__: *glares at him*_

_Kouga__: What?  
  
_

_Ayame__: Well I had asked the writer if you didn't have to say that embarrassing line she suggested, but now I think you can say it – _

_Kouga__: What?! _

_Ayame__: -With gusto._

_Kouga__: Oh come on! _

_Ayame__: Say it or else._

_Kouga__: Or else what?  
  
_

_Ayame__: Or else I tell you're precious "Kagome" about your little incident at the train station._

_Kouga__: *sweatdrops and looks at her nervously* You wouldn't._

_Ayame__: *plucks a cell phone out of the lining of her saloon girl dress and begins dialing Kagome's home phone number*_

_Kouga__: Alright! I'll say it! But only if you don't dial, please Ayame!_

_Ayame__: Okay! ^_^ _

_Kouga__: *takes a deep relieving sigh then turns to the readers. He smirks and stands with his legs apart* I ride 'em high and ride 'em fast! Yeehah! _

_Ayame__: *giggles*_

_Kouga__: *blushes and looks extremely confused* What the Sam Hill does that MEAN anyway?!?!_

Chapter 17: Hamburger and Country Pai

(AN: Try to remember that Pai is the name of one of the personal girls, and I put it up there on the off chance it actually sounds like it's English Equivalent "Pie".)

In the little Musashi village, there was a woman with ten children. Can you imagine that?? Ten children, and she hadn't murdered a single one of them! Well, not yet anyway….

            "Leave your little sister alone!" the mother shouted at one of them. She was trying to get them all to sit down for breakfast – but was failing horribly. She sighed loudly and walked outside to get a drink of water. As she was dipping the ladle into the pail, she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around and there was Inu Yasha.

            "Yes?" she asked. She didn't run from him, she knew who he was. But was nervous to see him lurking around the village without his keeper. What could he have wanted from a poor old mother such as herself?

            "Do you have any milk?" he asked.

            The woman blinked.

            WHAP!

            "ARGH!!" Inu Yasha kneeled on the ground clutching the huge lump on top of him head. 

            The woman gave him a flustered glare and dropped the now broken ladle on the ground. She stormed back inside her house, muttering about what a sick creep Inu Yasha was. 

            Inu Yasha growled, still holding the lump on his head, and waved a fist at the door she disappeared through. "_You've got a nasty mind, lady!!"_

            Inu Onna scampered over looking at the house then looked up at Inu Yasha worriedly. "Owa?" 

            Inu Yasha scooped her up with one arm onto his shoulder, and shot the house one last glare before he began to walk off again. "Crazy old bat. Don't worry, kid - there's plenty of women in the village with newborns." 

(AN: For those of you who don't know, women can only produce milk right after they have a baby and stuff. It doesn't last forever either.)

-

             And so there was another new mother in the village. But she wasn't an old woman who lived in a shoe – she only had three kids. Two boys and a girl. She had just had a girl and the two boys were twins. She stood by her little cooking fire, making fish soup. The baby slept soundly in a papoose on the woman's back.  She stirred the soup with a wooden ladle and every few minutes lifted the ladle out for a taste test. It was either too bland or too salty, and there was always a thin line in between…

            "Excuse me," Inu Yasha walked up to her. 

            She turned to look at him. 

            "Do you have any milk?" he asked.

            WHAP!!

            The new lump was even more painful then the first one! 

            "Pervert!" the woman quickly walked away from him.

            "I'm not a pervert!" he shouted after her. He teetered where he stood with the pain in his head. 

             Inu Onna came over again with a sweatdrop. "Eeee, owa guh!" she tugged at his pants leg pleadingly. If her daddy was just going to keep getting hit, then maybe she _could wait till her mommy came back. _

            "No, no really! I can handle this!" Inu Yasha said waving at her. He hissed through his teeth pressing the lump down. Then he picked Inu Onna up again and walked away. 

-

            "Excuse me, do you have any milk?"

            WHA-CHING!

            Inu Yasha blocked the third woman's mad ladle with the tetsusaiga scabbard. He smirked smartly. That's right, Inu Yasha only had to be hit in the head twice before he learned to block! 

            But the woman was pretty quick too. Once he had the ladle blocked, she came at him with her second plan of attack. A hot skillet. 

            "DAH!!" Inu Yasha went down. 

            The woman huffed in harassment. "Sicko!" 

            Inu Onna jumped out growling like a puppy and charged the lady. She ran away screaming. Inu Onna stopped chasing her when she got to Inu Yasha. The pup sniffed him worriedly. Dog boy sat up. He was pretty much okay, except for the three red burn marks across his right cheek. He nodded and said, "One more place I guess…" ;;;

-

            There was a young woman in the town who farmed animals and grew rice. She had large innocent eyes and fluffy hair. Shio called her a class A air head zeppelin. She had only one child, yet that child was also a newborn.        

            Inu Yasha went up to her, "Excuse me."

            The lady turned to look at him with a look on her face that made her look like she had been snorting helium. 

            Inu Yasha took a deep breath and asked. "Do you by any chance have any milk?" he crossed his arms in front of him quickly ready for a ladel to come flying out of no where.

            She smiled at him and replied in a bubbly voice. "Oh! Why yes I do!"

            He lowered his arms hesitantly then dropped them and asked, "Really?"

            "Yeah!" she nodded. "Just one second! I'll get you some fresh goat's milk!" ^_^ 

-

            The air headed woman came back later with a pan of milk. She gave it to Inu Yasha, telling him it was no trouble at all. He took the pan and set in on the ground. Inu Onna leapt at it happily. She hung over the side of the pan, lapping up the milk like a starving puppy. Inu Yasha sighed in relief. Getting that milk was way too much trouble. 

            All of a sudden the air headed woman screamed causing Inu Yasha to jump. "_What??"_  he exclaimed. His nervousness was quite normal considering he got hit in the head and face with kitchenware all day. 

            _"Oh my lord!" she exclaimed pointing at him. "What in the world happened to you cheek!?!" _

            Inu Yasha facefaulted. 

-

"AH – TIEU!" 

BLING! 

Seventeen year old Sumiko searched every searchable nook and cranny of the forest for her Vitoletto, but to no avail. Soon she saw Shio coming back from his third date.

            She stopped her search and bounded over to hear how it went. The first thing she noticed was that he looked like a World War 2 veteran: sluggish, withdrawn, and drained of all emotion. She guessed how it went. "Bad day?"

            Shio gave her a despaired whimper before dropping to his knees. "_I need a hug."_ He croaked. 

            "Ohh," Sumiko picked him up off the ground and gave him a great bear hug. She carried him like he was her baby and sat down on a fallen tree trunk. 

            "I can't go on, Sumiko-chan," Shio said painfully. "Just leave me here alone to die!" 

            "Okay, stop now! Don't be such a drama queen!" she said cradling him a bit. 

            "It's no use, Sumiko!" he whimpered. "I'm just not meant to have a mate! God's gift to women must die a sad and lonely death!" 

            "Hush it, Shio! I can't believe you're saying this!" Sumiko exclaimed. "The Shio I know wouldn't cower in the corner with his tail between his legs! No way! The shio I know would spray on some more cologne, maybe brush out his hair, then take a deep breathe and say, 'I'm not tired! Just give me another bucket of strawberries and some whipped cream and I'll be fine!'"

            Shio sweatdropped and gave her a raised eyebrow. "I don't sound like that." ;;;

            "Not the point!" Sumiko said. "The point is that if there's anyone who's going to die a sad and lonely death, it's only the person who gives up too soon!" 

            Shio was silent and looked off to the side. Inspiring indeed little sister, but was it true? Only one way to find out. 

            Shio held out his hand. "Keven Klein." He replied. 

            Sumiko smiled and placed the bottle of men's cologne in his open hand. 

-

            Shin'yo told Yakidaruma and Sashimi to stop their warm-up meditation and stand beside her. "Ready Sashimasu?"

            Sashimasu stood a few feet away facing them with her arms crossed. "As I'll ever be." She replied dryly.

            Shin'yo ushered them closer then told her friend, "You may begin." 

            Sashimasu took a deep breath and placed her hand over her heart. She blinked and the light in her eyes grew brilliant. Within seconds a phantom-like glow surrounded her in a soft halo of light. Yukidaruma had to rub his eyes and squint at it to believe this glow was really there. The light seemed natural yet unnatural – or possibly even supernatural! 

            It must have been noon in the day but for at least a half of a minute, Sashimasu was like the brightest star in the darkest night.  But the light had faded as soon as it came, and Sashimasu became herself again.

            Sashimi gave an awed gasp and exclaimed, "That was beautiful, Mommy!" 

            Sashimasu took a bow and the two students clapped for her. Then she gave them an ear to ear grin and said, "It's quite an entertaining party trick, too!" ^______^

            Shin'yo rolled her eyes and said, "All right then, as my assistant Miss Sashimasu has just demonstrated, you will be practicing bringing out your light." 

            She put the students on opposite sides of the tile floor. "All of your previous training will help you for this. First you empty your mind, then you concentrate on your element. Then once you see the light in your mind, you draw it out!" 

            Yukidaruma closed his eyes and cleared his mind. He decided to concentrate on his element. 

            "Remember, I'm not asking you to show your full power, even if you're able to pull out a small amount and keep it constant you will have passed the test!" 

            The tiles around Yukidaruma's feet became icy and slick. Frost settled in his raven black hair and icicles sprouted off of his clothes. He reached into his mind out for the light, but it was too far away. The ice on the tiles crackled as it spread further out, The icicles grew longer and more jagged. He still couldn't reach the light! 

            '_What is it? Why can't I get closer?!'he thought frantically. _

            Suddenly he was brought out of his consentration by a new glowing light. As he came to, the icicles hanging from his sleeves broke off and shattered on the floor. Sashimi stood off to the side hugging herself. She was illuminated with a wispy silvery light that was as bright as demonstration given by Sashimasu. 

            Shin'yo watched her with her chin tilted upward a little bit. She was either surprised by Sashimi's display, or at least very impressed. Sashimasu who was watching not far away also watched, though her face showed more signs of amazement. Then the light disappeared and she turned to smile at Sashimasu excitedly. "I did it! I did it! Did I do well, Mommy??" 

            "Very well, Sashimi-chan!" her mother gave her a wink and a thumbs up. 

            Sashimi giggled to herself and put her hands behind her back, bowing cutely. 

            Yukidaruma felt a little bit jealous of course, but all that meant was that next time he had to try harder. 

-

            Well by date #4, Shio was starting to get full from eating. So witought even thinking about canceling the next three already made reservations at the restaurant, Shio went on to his next date with country girl, Pai. 

            He met up with her, she dressed pretty casually for the date – casual for a hillbilly that is. Short shorts, A red low cut shirt that tied together in the front. Even though no one in Japan dressed like that (not even the hookers). When Shio saw her he was very shocked that she would dress like that. Especially since she was so busty.  It was like the cloth that was tying her shirt together would tear open or something. 

            "How-dy!" Pai greeted him with an unusually strong handshake. 

            "Howdy!" Shio grinned at her. "Have you already eaten?"

            Pai shrugged her shoulders. "Why for? You already full?"

            "A little." Shio answered.

            "No problem, we can find somethin' else tuh do!" Pai patted him on the back also unusually hard. So they stopped for a moment to brainstorm. 

            "How 'bout cow tipping?" Pai suggested.

            Shio blinked. "Cow tipping?"

            "Yeah!" she exclaimed. "Don't tell me you never heard a' cow tipping a'fore?" 

            Shio scanned his encyclopedia of futuristic knowledge but nothing came up on cow tipping! Oo 

            "I'm afraid I haven't." he answered truthfully. 

            She shrugged again and simply smiled at him. "Well, that's okay I guess. I'll learn ya!" 

            So they began walking toward the next cattle farm. 

            "How old are you by the way?" Pai asked.

            "Seventeen." 

            "Really? So am I." Shio said. "And you said your family distills sake and stuff right?"

            "That's right! I've been drinking it and making it myself for years!" she said proudly. 

            "That's cool. I think of Sake as my partying brother that gives people a hangover." Shio said. 

            "You like it too?" she asked. 

            "Of course." He replied. 

            "Well, I'll have to make some for ya sometime!" she winked at him. 

            He grinned back then asked, "You don't kill demons do you?"

            She looked upward for a second as if she had to think about it first, then said, "Nope. I'd rather go fish'n."

            He nodded and sighed. "That's good." Then he asked, "Are you a virgin?"

            After a few moments of silence, she gave him a wary eye. "Are you tryin' to get some from me, City Boy?"

            "No, no! I was just wondering!" he said quickly and innocently. "I mean hey! I'm a virgin."

            She smiled at him and replied. "Me too."

            He looked up and said in a surprised tone. "Really?"

            "Yeah." She blushed a little bit, cute for her freckly background. "I'm saven' myself fur marriage. What about you?"

            "Me? Oh yeah! Of course!" he nodded honestly. 

            She laughed to herself then tilted her head forward, giving him a mysterious wink. "That don't mean though, that I don't like to have fun."

            Shio looked at her surprised and he laughed interestedly. A girl that knows future things, drinks sake, is sexy, and likes to have fun. This one seemed pretty good. 


	19. Shio's Souffle and Inu's Lullaby

Chapter 18: Shio's Souffle and Inu's Lullaby

If you've ever gone cow tipping, you'd know that you were one of two types of people: The vegetarian shit that crys over the suffering cow, or the regular person who ends up having a thrill and laughing his nads off. 

            "Oh god!" Shio tumbled into the grass grinning like a maniac. "That was amazing! Cow Tipping is the Shiz'nick!" ^___^

            Pai came tumbling in after him and they rolled together laughing like idiots –idiots having the time of their lives. Then they looked at each other and their laughter faultered as they pulled each other into a hard kiss. They rolled together like animals in the grass growling and moaning and making out.

            "Pai, I think you're awesome," Shio said between breaths. She answered with a deep moan. 

            He broke away for a split second to ask a serious question, "Would you be my girlfriend?"

            She immediately smiled and attacked him with more furiously passionate kisses then before.

            After a few moments he said between kisses, "I guess – that means – yes?"

            She made a sound of agreement. "Mmhmm! I want you!" 

            ((Then we put the soufflé in the oven. Woo! Watch it _rise…!_))

            "I'll tell ya, Shio! I've been waiting to be pleasured for a _long_ time!" she said.

            ((The yeast is _heating up_! Pay attention and you'll see the bread _hardening_…))

            "I have too, Pai."

            ((Wow! Lookit 'er go!)) 

            "How do you want it?" he asked. 

            ((And now it's ready! Boy oh boy, doesn't it look tastey!))

            "Hard." 

            ((Once a soft and resting mass and now big and bulging over the edge of the pan! Mmm-mm! It's hard and hot and full of hot, delicious swiss cheese!))

            "That's the only way I give it." He replied and lifted her legs up.

            "Wait!" she suddenly said.

            ((….))

            "Yeah?" he asked quickly. He wanted to get to the "girlfriend/boyfriend" thing soon. 

            She paused for a moment looking off to the side before saying, "You're really serious about being my boyfriend, right?"

            Shio blinked at her. Time was kinky. "What?? Yes, of course!"

            ((And now we take out the soufflé….))

            Pai smiled at him. "Okay good, because if you ever try to cheat on me – I'll kill you."

            (Sfx: tire screech)

            Shio looked up at her. "Pardon?"

            Pai smiled affectionately at him but looked ever the more serious. "If you cheat on me I'll kill you."

            Shio blinked.

            ((And now we let the soufflé cool off…))

            Shio looked at her confused and they just sat that way for a while, with Pai's legs half raised and her looking up at him from her position in the grass and Shio staring into space trying to understand what she meant by that comment. Was she kidding or what?

            "I just think it's wrong for men to cheat on their girlfriends with multiple other girls." 

            ((The soufflé is cooling….))

            "I mean, what's the point in life, if all you're out for is wild, hot sex?"

            ((What's this?? Oh no! The soufflé is sinking in!!!))

            "I mean not that pleasure isn't important. But I find that the longest lasting relationships, are the ones that are based solely on a platonic nature…"

            ((It's softening!! IT'S SOFTENING!!!!))

            "What do you think, Shio?" 

            Shio's smile hadn't disappeared the whole time, but he had dropped her legs. "I think – um – that you're…a very good girlfriend!" 

            ((Oh no! And the soufflé goes flat and lifeless!!))

            "Good." Pai smiled at him then suddenly looked even more serious. "Cause if you ever do break my heart, I will crush yours."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

            Inu Yasha didn't even wait for Inu Onna to finish. Once he got the milk, it was straight back to the well for him. Of course, Kagome hadn't even come back yet.    

            Ho, she must've thought she was pretty slippery, staying all night in her time and even longer the next morning. Oh yes, she was in _soooo much trouble when she got back, yessir'e bob…._

            Inu Yasha folded his arms on the side of the well and looked inside for the thousandth time. It was dark and cold and hollow inside. So not like Kagome. He sighed again before a thought came to him. Cold, dark, and hollow… that's how Kikyo was. If Kikyo hadn't pinned him to a tree, he would never have met Kagome; and if the well wasn't there, he would have had a smaller chance of meeting her. 

            So that proved there was a silver lining for every cloud, just as there is a tax for every silver lining. Now it came a question of whether Inu Yasha wanted the rain or the silver. Both of which were quite enticing. (In there own way, of course.)

            Inu Yasha came out of his thoughts to see Inu Onna crouching on the ground in front of him. She sat on all fours with her backfeet tucked under her and her arms straight. She tilted her head to the side and gave him an innocent smile. 

            He tilted his chin upward a little and looked down his nose at her. "What? Came back already?" Then he leaned forward staring her straight in the eye. "That was pretty fast for a puppy." He reached out with his thumb and tapped the tip of her baby nose causing her to giggle. "You've got a pretty good sniffer there, kid." He smirked at her and thought to himself, _That__ was my __contribution._

He had automaticly surprised himself for thinking that. It was quite obvious that Inu Onna was his daughter, but he had never really thought of her as his daughter – just a burden. Realizing this made him feel a little bit bad. 

            While he was off guard, Inu Onna crouched low, wiggled her booty, and jumped on his chest. 

            "Hey!" Inu Yasha fell back and Inu Onna climbed inside of  his haori. By the time Inu Yasha sat up again, she had already made herself a comfortable little nest in the neckline of his fire rat coat. Inu Yasha looked down at her with a sweatdrop and feh'ed. "You're so stupid." He muttered. 

            Inu Onna purred and smiled ear to ear. 

            Inu Yasha sighed and tapped her on the forehead with his index finger. "Why do you like me, huh? I'm no father. It's not like I've spent any time with you at all since you were born, and I haven't exactly tried to be nice to you or anything." He pulled his finger back and Inu Onna looked up at him. "So why do you still like me?"

            She smiled and said nothing, but looked up at him expectantly. 

            "Now what do you want?" he asked.

            She yawned and continued to look up at him.

            Was it her nap time or something? What did she usually want around nap time? He had already fed her. Inu Yasha raked his memory for what Kagome would do before Inu Onna went to sleep. Then it hit him. 

            He scowled down at her and said, "Baka! I'm not going to sing to you!" 

            Inu Onna wrinkled her nose back up at him indignantly. "Owisai!" she yipped. 

            Inu Yasha's ears twitched. It almost sounded like she had tried to sit him just then. He was quiet for a few moments before he let out a low groan and began to try and think of a good lullaby. He didn't know that many songs. Most songs he heard, he thought were gay or stupid. But, there was one song he knew. He wasn't sure where or when he learned it, but he only heard it once and it just stuck. Slowly he moved his arms up to hold Inu Onna as if he were cradling her (even though she was still in his coat). Inu Yasha blushed lightly and he looked around. He could kill demons, but he really couldn't sing. Any witnesses would have to die. Then he took a deep breath and looked down at Inu Onna and started, "_It's a little bit funny –" his face became bright red. He hated singing, "__This fe~eling inside. I'm not one of those who can, easily hide." _

            Inu Onna looked up at him with a reassuring smile to go on. 

            "_I don't have much money, but, boy –erm girl if I did….I'd buy a big house where…we both could live." He looked down at Inu Onna, expecting her to burst into tears at his horrible singing voice. _

            Wrong-o. She looked up at him as if he were Elton John.
    
            Such an adorable smile, Inu Yasha couldn't help but smile back. His voice grew just a little bit louder. "_If I was a sculpter, but then again no; or a man who makes potions for a travelling show.__ Well I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do." He paused to get a more comfortable sitting position with his back to the well. _
    
                   "_My gift is my song,_" he sang in the correct notes that were above a whisper. "_And this one's for you….And you can tell everybody, this is your song."  His smile became a bit more relaxed and genuine like Inu Onna's was. "__It may be quite simple, but now that it's done….I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind – that I put down in woooords….." he leaned forward and put his forehead against hers and they both smiled happily.__ "How wonderful life is, now you're in the world."_
    
    _               Inu Onna giggled as he sat up straight again still smiling. He set into a light rocking motion.__ "I sat on the roof…and I kicked off the moss……well a few of these verses, well they've got me quite cross….But the sun's been kind, while I wrote down this song….It's for people like you that, keep it turned oooooon……" _
    
    _               Inu Onna snuggled into him as he continued. __"So excuse me forgetting…..but these things I do…..You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue….." Inu Yasha knew that this part of the song required a loud voice. "__…Anyway the thing is…what I really mean…..You're are the sweetest eyes, IIIII've ever seeen!!...And you can tell everybody….this is your song…."_
    
    _               The inside of the well lit up with light. _
    
                   "_It may be quite simple…but noooow that it's done…." _Inu Yasha looked down at Inu Onna as her eyelids were getting heavy. 
    
                   Kagome heard some of the singing from the bottom of the well, but didn't understand why. She climbed up the side of the well as Inu Yasha's voice became softer again. She poked her head up and watched him silently. 
    
                   Poor Inu Yasha was so lost in the moment, he didn't notice her arrival at all. _"I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind…that I put down in words….how wonderful life is…now you're in the world…"       _


	20. Mrs Robinson

Chapter 19: Mrs. Robinson

(AN: For those of you who don't know, Mrs. Robinson is a famous character from a 70's or 80's movie _called The Graduate_. I suggest renting it, but she's the teacher of the main character and she seduces him even though she is already married and much older then he is. Sort of like a _Stacy's Mom_ kinda thing…)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ^_~ *

            The personal girl, Nikkei the cinnamon girl was fifth on Shio's date list. She sat waiting for him in the forest on a red tree stump. She wore a lilac kimono decorated with yellow daffodils, which was similar to the one she wore when she first appeared. Must've had a thing for the color purple; and as we all know, the color purple is a symbol of honor and loyalty. ^___^ (AN: Didn't know that? Well now you do.)

            She sat patiently waiting for him with a smile on her face and a song in her heart. She looked upward at a few birdies in a tree nearby as they chirped their hellos. She laughed and her steady brown eyes lit up. The birds flew out of the tree. One landed on her outstretched hand, and the other on her knee. Shio hung down from a tree branch to watch her "speak bird" to them. 

            He blushed lightly at the cuteness and dropped down to his feet. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ -*_&#~~~__)@

            Near the well, Inu Yasha watched as Inu Onna's battle with the sandman was slowly coming to an end. The pup yawned and batted her right foot as she stretched. She snuggled into him and blinked unevenly. 

            He smiled down at her through half lidded eyes. All it took was one hour. One hour out of all of the time he wasted fighting his fatherhood, to learn and accept. Or maybe he knew all that time that he would give in easily if he tried, and that was why he fought. He wasn't sure, but now that he had just experienced it, he liked this whole father thing. Yeah that's it! 

            _I'm a daddy. He told himself, immediately feeling a rush of unknown love, love like he had never felt in his life, love for an entity with tiny toes and a little nose, a child that was half of who he was and half of the female he adored…_

            And it felt so good to say! _I'm a daddy!_ _This is my daughter! Can you believe this? This is amazing! I'm a daddy!! Do people know about this?! It's amazing! Wowwie! All people should have babies! -^_^- _

_            Ahem…_

Inu Yasha froze in horror. He knew that sound of clearing of phlegm anywhere. He whirled around, forgetting he had Inu Onna in his coat. Kagome was still inside of the well, with her chin resting on her fist, and her other arm resting on the edge of the well. She looked up at him with starry eyes and a knowing, cat-like grin on her face. It was the grin that meant she thought she knew him oh so well.    

            So many emotions hit him at once, which caused him to tremble violently. "Kagome?!" he quacked. 

            She continued to grin, he hated it, it was just so smug to him!!! "Hello, Inu Yasha." She mewed. ^___^

            Inu Yasha pumped himself for words to say, but was coming out dry. He had to think of something while she was pulling herself out of the well. 

            Kagome dropped her bag in the grass and leaned against the side of the well. Inu Yasha backed away from her, she had already caught him off guard, now she was going to do something and he assumed it would either be to hang it over his head and make him be her little slave puppet, or she would rub it in or something stupid like that, he wasn't sure but that grin of hers was going to put a tick in his eyebrow if she didn't say something soon!!

            Then he realized that she had been gone all night and the face of anger triumphed over his shock and fear. "Wh-where the hell were you last night?!" he finally croaked out. 

            Still smiling, Kagome looked at him questioningly, "Hmm?" 

            "Kagome, you've got some s'plaining to do!" Inu Yasha threatened. He loomed over her, stressing his fury. "Do you have any idea what time it is?!" 

            "Mmm, the past?" Kagome guessed.

            "Don't get cute with me! You've been gone all night! Don't you know how much I – er – this puppy needs you?!" He pulled Inu Onna out of his jacket, instantly waking her up. "Since you left, the only thing she's had to eat is that formula shit you left behind, some shitty goat's milk, and she's been trying to eat Shippou!" 

            "Really?" Kagome asked still smiling at him.

            "This is a fragile age for a puppy, Kagome! You can't just run off and leave her with strangers! She has to be with her paren – er – mother right now!" 

            Inu Onna squealed with gless at the sight of her mommy, so Inu Yasha handed her over. Kagome nodded and smiled, "Mmhmm, mmhmm, I totally agree." She replied. 

            Well even though Inu Yasha did say what he knew had to be said, he still didn't get the reation from her that he planned. Maybe she would have looked a little guilty, or apologize to him or something. In fact, the more he thought about it, the less he knew just what it was he wanted from her. 

            They began walking back to the village. Inu Onna had magically fallen asleep again. Kagome carried her while Inu Yasha carried the newly supplied backpack. Inu kept throwing glanced at Kagome when he thought she didn't notice. He wished he knew what she was thinking about. "You – you know….you're lucky that I was around." He added. "If it weren't for me, who knows what would have happened to her."

            Kagome stopped walking and grabbed Inu Yasha's sleeve to make him stop too. 

            "What?" he asked.

            She went around to face him, stood on her tip-toes, and pecked him on the lips. 

            Inu didn't say anything, he just blinked at her in shock. 

            Kagome grinned and walked ahead of him toward the village at a quicker pace. 

            Inu Yasha paused before licking his lips. Then he fast-walked after her. "Oi, Kagome! What was that for?!" 

            "Not telling!" she called back.

            "Tell me!! I _need_ to know!!!" 

            "Thank you, Inu Yasha!" ^___^ * 

            "_For what?!"___

_--------------------------~~~~~~~~~~~~----------------------@_@***********_

            Miroku went for a walk with Shippou the shoulder barnacle. 

            "Why?"

            "Because."

            "Why?"  
            "Because."

            "Why?"

            "Because."

            "_Because why?!?" Shippou bobbed impatiently. _

            Miroku sighed. Sometimes he understood why Inu Yasha would slap him so much. "Why has Kagome been gone so long? Because she's taking a break, and frankly I don't blame her." The priest declared. However Kagome did it was amazing. None of the conveniences of her own time, Inu the illegitimate father badmouthing the heck out of everyone, Shippou's innocent yet annoying questions, Sango trying to seduce her, Shio's perverseness, and now a baby to take care of, a baby who was badly in need of some serious tranquilizers – or Riddlin. (AN: However you spell it...By the way, if you can't figure out why that above paragraph sounded weird, that was the group from Miroku's pov.)

            They stopped at a little farm house for some fresh bread that the old wife who lived there couldn't help but give some out to them. The old man of the farm house came over, sensing a child on his youth radar. "Hey there, sonny!" he smacked Miroku on the back almost making the monk drop his bread. "Good afternoon sir." Miroku nodded respectfully. 

            The old man came and sat next to Shippou. "Hey there, sonny!" he repeated and messed up Shippou's hair even more then it already was. 

            Since Shippou was a kid, he didn't really notice how messed up it was. "Hi," He said between chews. 

            "Would you like to hear the legend of DaggerClaw?" the old man asked.

            Shippou shrugged and took another huge bite of bread. "Sure, why not?"

            "Once upon a time –" he started. Miroku figured the old man would have told the story whether Shippou commented or not. "- not far away from this very feudal state, a demon was born."

            Shippou swallowed a huge wad of bread and took a ravenous bite, it was like watching piranhas on the discovery channel. "A demon, huh?"

            "Yes! A demon! He was six foot tall, and a fully grown man at birth!" the old man extended his arms to illustrate how much of a skyscraper the demon was. "He was a full blooded demon, born from the souls of many suffering women they say."

            Miroku was already listening to the story, but he became interested at the word "women."

            "He wasn't a very reliable demon either, oh no….see, the demons hated him, yet so did the humans…because he only cared for himself – would sell anybody out, or endanger anyone's life to get what he wanted in the end." The old man went on. "And the reason they call him dagger claw is because his notable choice of weapon is his long and sharp claws, sharper then daggers they are, and he hasn't used any other _physical_ weapon."

            Shippou took another bite of bread then heaved when it went down the wrong pipe. 

            "That's right. He may have only had his claws, yet Dagger claw was as sharp as a sword, with the armor class to match." The old man paused for a moment to stick his finger in his ear then he went on again, "Of course, Dagger claw is real. I've seen him with my own eyes, but most of the time, you won't know him if you see him unless he reveals his true form to you, and he'll only do that if you're his prey."

            "Were you his prey?" Miroku asked. It would have been Shippou who asked that, but at the moment Shippou was doubled over on the ground trying to give himself the Heimlich maneuver. 

            "No….but I used to know someone who was." The old man said.

            "What happened to him?" Miroku asked.

            "He – he was DaggerClaw's prey ya' moron! What do you think happened to him?!" 

            "Um.."

            "DaggerClaw ripped out the guy's eyes and his nerves, then drank the blood and puss out of his veins like they were straws!" 

            Miroku acknowledged that, then he tossed the rest of his bread over his shoulder. 

----------------------------------X_________X * _ * _ * _ * _ * $$$######@@@_____

            In Shio's wanderings, it was only one out of every thirty-eight or so women who actually took up the occupation of dominatrix. Nikkei had a thing for bondage and black leather when it came to the bedroom. 

            Shio picked up his shirt and pulled a small, hand mirror out of it. He held it up in front of him and began to brush his hair back into neatness. Nikkei was wiping her mascara off. If she were to walk into the town wearing it, she might've been stoned to death. She glanced at Shio who was brushing out his hair. "You have very pretty hair."

            "Thank you, I know." 

            "Do you wear makeup?" she asked. 

            Shio's lips thinned for a split second, but he was used to this question. "No."

            "No?" she asked, sounding a bit surprised.

            "Nope." He replied. "I have a natural beauty. No need for makeup."

            "Yeah," she nodded then asked. "Have you ever worn it before?"

            Shio paused for a moment, glanced at her then looked in his mirror again. "Once….but I hated it."

            "Why?" she asked. "I think you would look very sexy with a little bit of mascara on your lashes."

            "It made my eyes itch." He replied. "And the facial stuff made my skin break out."

            "Oh yeah, you have sensitive skin?" she asked.

            "_Very_ sensitive." He emphasized. Shio separated the back half of his hair from the front, gathered it up and tied it up in back with a white ribbon. Putting the shirt on, and the mirror safely tucked away, he turned his gaze in Nikkei's direction and shot her a hot smirk. 

            She smiled suggestively and winked back. 

            Shio grinned and pulled a little black book out of his shirt. "Yesh, I believe a high rating is in order." He wrote in Nikkei's name…and she became one of five Nikkei's. Four stars….email address: Dominatricksw0mAn@aol.com........and of course, age…

            "By the way, how old are you if you don't mind me asking." Shio asked as he scribed the full email address. By the look of her and of her maturity, he guessed she was 18 – 19 – maybe even 20….

            "Twenty-nine."

            The tip of Shio's quill, scratched across the page and ripped Nika through Obleena in half. He didn't seem to notice the huge rip, even though he was staring right at it. "29?"

            "Yeah. I know I don't look it though." She shrugged casually and went to go clean up.

            Suddenly, Shio felt like he was going to be sick. This woman would probably hit menopause before he reached his peak! (AN: It's said that a man reaches his peak in sex at age 18…where as Shio is only 17…_darn_…)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What's this?! Am I actually taking the time to get the links to the pictures you've all been waiting for!? Halleluiah!! The planets have aliened!!! 

- this is the picture of Shio. The first one I drew of him. And everyone calls him a woman! I've been trying to modify this so that it's a little bit easier to tell if he's a male or not. Even though non-anime watchers still find what I recently have to still be feminine…that's supposed to happen. If memory serves, the guide to kitsune says that kitsune are NATURALLY feminine…that's why everyone has such a hard time trying to figure out whether Shippou is a girl or not.

- This is Shinyo – Shio and Sumiko's mommy; Sashimi and Yukidaruma's light teacher….i thought it turned out very well, I had only drawn her once before this one on a piece of notebook paper, and I had lost that one… 

- Four – count 'em – four models of Sumiko from left to right starting at the top: back view of her adult form; dog demon form from the story "brownies"; kid form, in a magenta yuttuka; and adult form sitting in a cute position. I'm not done with this picture colors wise….it's completely drawn, but I'm like 1/4th the way through trying to learn Computer graphics on it…the only one I've been able to complete is the dog demon Sumiko and a little bit of adult sumiko's hair… 


	21. Luv is in the Air

_[Disclaimer]_

_[Sango is waiting on a street corner wearing tight black leather pants with a chain thing on it, a tight playboy bunny shirt, and a black leather jacket + she's wearing strategically placed jewelry and clip on piercings] _

_[Off screen, we hear a toilet flush]_

_[Sango: *sweatdrop and vein pop at the same time*]_

_[Miroku: *rides on scene on a motor cycle. He has a bandana tied on his head, he's wearing a leather jacket and faded jeans and a white t-shirt underneath the jacket. He also has cowboy boots and various chains, links, piercings, and an earring* ^___^ hey there, bunny!]_

_[Sango: How did you get a license to ride a motorcycle? - -] _

_[Miroku: ^_^ Internet.]___

_[Sango: *pulls her jacket shut* I don't know about you…but I hate these clothes that writer person made us wear]_

_[Miroku: Oh I dunno…*rubs the collar of his leather jacket* I think it's kind of spiffy. *reaches up and touches the bandana on his head* Although…. *he pulls it off. Even his hair is in spikes* I think I could do without this thing here.]_

_[Sango: *rolls her eyes* whatever….*walks over, sits behind him on the motorcycle and holds onto him* Can you say the disclaimer soon? I'd like to get out of these clothes.]_

_[Miroku: ^_______________________________^…hmmmm!!]___

_[Sango: …oh shit ;;;]_

_[Miroku: ^__^ Ah, Sango my dear!__ You make my accelerator happy!]_

_[Sango: *flick his ear hard*]_

_[Miroku: Owie! v]_

_[Sango: If you're not going to say it, I am! *looks at readers* Scorpiogal does not own Inu Yasha and we are very thankful for that….though if she did own him, she might have done something about his inexplicable problem of drifting between Kikyo and Kagome]_

_[Miroku: *makes biker gang sign* Here here! ^__^]_

_[Sango: Okay. Did you say that other thing you were supposed to say?]_

_[Miroku: Yep!__ Already did!]_

_[Sango: You did? Oo When?]_

_[Miroku: Oh the uh – accelerator thing.]___

_[Sango: That was it??]_

_[Miroku: Yep!__ That's it!]_

_[Sango: But I thought you were just saying that to me…]_

_[Miroku: Well I was going to say it to the readers, but I felt like saying it to you instead.]_

_[Sango: *pause* Oh…..]_

_[Miroku: Wanna go dry hump?]_

_[Sango: Only if there's alcohol involved.]_

_[Miroku: Of course!__ *revs motorbike* Drugs and unprotected sex, here we come! ^_^]_

_[They motor off screen with the theme music to Grease in the backround]_

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Chapter 19: Luv is in the Air…

* * *

            Inu Onna lay curled up into a ball in the middle of Kagome's new sleeping bag. It was wider, warmer, and softer. The infant was now far away from the world of reality, chasing swallow tailed butterflies in a grassy open meadow. 

            Kagome smiled at her adoringly and kissed the top of her fluffy little head. Then she stood up slowly and tip-toed to the other side of the hut where Inu Yasha was sitting quietly. 

            She sat sown nest to him and they both watched Inu Onna sleep. Kagome rested her chin on her hand and couldn't help but smile. "You know she really is adorable." She commented.

            "Yeah," Inu Yasha said. "Until she wakes up."

            Kagome looked up at him. "I mean really! It's amazing how good with her you are! By yourself, you were able to calm her down and get her to sleep. Everyone else could barely keep up with her!" 

            Inu Yasha smirked and beamed with pride. "Of course. I mean I'm a dog demon too! It's easy to figure out why she would like me!" 

            Kagome laughed to herself and smiled up at him. "I guess some people are just likable by nature." She winked at him. 

            Inu Yasha looked at her surprised and blushed lightly. Quickly, he looked away in the opposite direction. 

            Kagome hugged her knees and smiled to herself. _Aww__, he's so predictable_, she thought. She hadn't felt so happy and at peace for months. She felt forgiving yet at the same time, quite vengeful. She was glad that her mother was right about him coming around eventually, but now she had to tease him to make sure he got the message that he had been a naughty little boy. 

            Kagome grinned a maliciously happy smirk and forced back an evil laugh. Then she closed her eyes and began to hum the tune to the song Inu Yasha had sung to Inu Onna. 

            Inu Yasha's ears twitched. Being a tad tone-def, he didn't realize what it was at first. It wasn't till she had gotten to the chorus when he had sweat dropped and clammed up noticeably. 

He glanced out of the corner of his eyes at her. Even though his stare was indirect, he was throwing fire and ice and fear out of his fire/ice/fear thrower. "Uh – what song is that you are humming?" he asked in a shaky voice that made him sound psychotic. 

Kagome didn't seem to notice his building up tension. She casually shrugged and answered, "Oh you know, just some tune I heard on my way here." 

Inu Yasha's eyes grew wider and he snapped his head back in the direction of the opposite wall. "Some tune you heard on your way here." He repeated. 

"Yeah, one of those tunes you hear once and it somehow sticks in your head." She replied. She looked at the back of his head and grinned smugly. 

Busted, Big Boy…

She leaned toward him slightly. "You ever had a song like that stuck in your head?"

"_No_." he answered way too quickly. He sucked at lying. 

"Hm," Kagome shrugged again and sat more comfortably with her eyes closed. "Yeah, well it was a real pretty song. I liked it."

Inu Yasha said nothing, but he was already making plans for her not to sponge any more manipulative-ness out of Shio. 

"Of course, the true character in lyrics comes from the voice of the singer, I believe." Kagome mused. "I mean some singers are good with tempo and knowing every single note in the song, and then there are some singers with actual feeling in their lyrics, you know?"

Inu Yasha stayed silent. She assumed he was either listening or wondering what the hell she was talking about.

"Some singers will just put out a bunch of random songs they hope others will listen to. I find that the most memorable singers, are the singers who truly believe in their lyrics with all of their heart and soul." It was then that Kagome realized how she would kick some serious ass if she had only taken speech class before home schooling. "What do you think Inu Yasha?" she asked sitting in a cute pose. 

He was still for a moment before he shrugged and shook his head. So she wasn't going to make fun of him after all. And even though she hadn't really said anything bad or good, she somehow made him feel a little more comfortable about the matter. Singing was like bearing your soul whether you were good at it or not. He was comfortable that for a moment he bore his soul to her and the baby. 

Kagome sighed. That was as much she could put out for the moment without actually telling him she had heard the song. 

After a moment, he tried as casually as possible to glance at her without her noticing or thinking he wanted to know what she was doing. She wasn't sitting any more. Poor, tired Kagome decided that she now wanted to rest on her stomach, with her upper body propped up on her elbows and her legs slightly apart.

Hello.

Inu Yasha gulped. 

Well now that he was done bearing his singer's soul to her, it was time for her to bear a little something for him – _just_ a little _something_….

Doggy style. 

Inu Onna opened her eyes slightly.

-

Matatabi was waiting for Shio by the god tree. She was in her human form, a very sleek and graceful one. Since she was a demon she looked athletic like the demon hunter girl he dated a couple chapters back. She had black hair with two streaks of white for bangs. She wore a kimono meant for the beautiful, entertaining waitresses who worked in those restaurants. And it suited her well. 

As he approached, her black cat tail wiggled around behind her. Her mysterious smile made his approaching walk even more of a strut then it already was. His eyebrows slanted slightly and he gave her a sexy smile. 

"So then I'm the last date of the day am I?" she asked sweetly. 

"Last but certainly not least," he said before he stopped in front of her in one of his more beckoning poses. "Though more definitely best." 

She smiled at him, purred in amusement and skipped off in a random direction.

Shio smirked and darted after Matatabi. Something about her made the devil in him want to dive out. 

Hehe…

Or should I say _in_?

^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^~~~8~@

(CG: Lordy, what kind of horn dog are you?)

(SG: I know. I even scare myself. @_X)

^*^*^*^**^^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^**^*^*^*^**^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^X-x_X

"I'VE GOT IT!!!" Sumiko jumped up and screamed.

Sango gasped and knocked her cup of tea over. She grabbed the front of her shirt where her heart was and panted. Sumiko proceeded to go into her victory robot dance. 

"W00t w00t!" ^o^ "W00t! W00t!" 

Naraku rolled his eyes and looked away with peeved, narrowed eyes. 

Sango looked up at her nervously and wondered if it was safe to even ask. 

She decided it wasn't. 

Sumiko swiped up Naraku and did the german waltz with him around in uneven circles. "We've got it, CMM! We've got it! We've got it, CMM! We've got it!" she chanted.

"What have you got?" Miroku asked as he walked up dragging a swirly eyed Shippou behind him. 

Sumiko faced him and sucked oxygen through her teeth loudly with excitement. "I've got IT!" she pointed her finger toward heaven. She waved to them and moon-walked out of the village. 

Miroku, Shippou and Sango didn't even bother to stop her or ask again. If there was one thing they had learned from Sumiko, it was that it never helped to ask. 

            Kirara scampered over as stopped in front of Sango. _Mew._

(AN: OMG!! Kirara's in the story!! Even _I_ was starting to think she had had a character death! Oo)

            "Oh yeah!" Sango exclaimed. She picked up Kirara and stood up. "I promised Kirara some tuna today. 

            Miroku smiled after her. He left the swirly eyed Shippou in the grass and followed after the switching hips. 

-------------------------------(AN: hehe…^_^ follow the bouncing ball….)

(CQ: - - * Seriously, I think you should go get your horomone levels checked.)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------

Before the silence had a chance to disappear, Kagome decided that now would be a good time to do her homework. She set out her pencil case and compass along with her big math book. This assignment was about angles and line segments. 

            She got in a comfortable position on her stomach. If you're gonna do homework you might as well be comfortable….

            Inu Yasha was still sitting next to her. She felt a little bit of tension coming from him, but then again she always did so she would try to suppress it while she did her homework. 

            He was just sitting there staring at her. Yes he had "the urge"…but you can't just randomly mount your woman like that….at least he didn't think you could Oo ……could you?

            He looked down at her feet. "Nice shoes. Are they new?"

            Kagome narrowed her eyes at her mathproblems and replied, "Thanks and no. I've only been wearing them since I started school."

            Ouch. 

            Inu Yasha looked down at them. Did she ever take off her shoes? Or her socks? She did when she bathed and stuff, but he never really looked at them, he was too busy looking at-

            "Why do you ask?" Kagome wondered aloud.

            "Oh, no reason." Inu Yasha said, narrowing his eyes at the shoes. He stuck out an index claw and inserted it between her sock and the back of the shoe. With a flick of the wrist her shoe popped off of her foot. 

            As soon as the cold air hit her sock, Kagome asked. "What are you doing?" 

            "Nothing." Inu Yasha replied. He pulled off her other shoe. Kagome tried to ignore him but she was wary. He was up to something screwy. (AN: ^_^ me and my ironic choice of words…)

 Inu Yasha looked up from her feet to her skirt. As we all know, the shortest distance between A (Kagome's feet) and B (The promise land) is a straight line. He dropped her shoes on the floor and grabbed her ankles.

            Kagome's pencil stopped mid-equation and she froze with her eyes on the page. Now she knew he was up to something. Something kinky…

            Inu Yasha looked up at her. She wasn't saying anything so holding her ankles, he spread her legs wider. She gasped and before she could say another word, she was pulled across the floor away from her math book. "_EeP_!" Oo  

* * *

Well the links in the last chapter didn't work, but if you go to my website that's in my bio, you can see the pictures there! ^___^ okay!?? 


	22. Big Brother Is Watching You

Well now, how are we today? ^__^ Good…whatever your answer is, goooood……

I don't know whether everyone who read the last chapter read it or not, but I had mentioned some very important information in the bottom authors notes in the last chapter. They mentioned a website – where MY art illustrations with Shio and such are stored. Now if you had taken the time to read my authors notes, you would have gotten to go to the website and view those beautiful pics. If you didn't read my authors notes, then I'm hurt and disappointed like no other. 

I don't own Inu Yasha, but I do own a spot on deviantart.com.

Chapter 21: Big Brother is Watching You

            Sashimi and Yukidaruma sat on the steps of the shrine that were sheltered by the extended roof. The sky was wet washed in shades of gray; mostly dark gray as it was pouring rain. Yukidaruma sat staring into the horizon with a vague look of a deep thinker. The light was harder to get to then their teacher had first let on; though Sashimi seemed to take to the light summons like a fish to water. But then again, nothing was ever as easy as it looked. 

            Sashimi sat with one leg crossed over the other and her shoulders back as she rested her hands on the concrete behind her. She smiled up at the clouds as if they were blue skies and softly hummed a tune that Yukidaruma was unfamiliar with. 

            The screen door entrance of the shrine slid open causing Yukidaruma and Sashimi to glance over at the person exiting. Shin'yo walked out dressed in travelers clothes rather then her usual aristocratic robes. She tied a cloth bundle of supplies around her waist in the same fashion as an obi. She tilted the wide Naru-gasa hat above her eyebrows and smiled pleasantly at the two of them. 

            Yukidaruma and Sashimi jumped up and ran to her. "Where are you going, Shin'yo-sama?" Sashimi asked. 

            Shin'yo fluffed their hair and replied, "I am heading out into the country my dears. And I shall not come back until the end of the month."

            Yukidaruma looked at her shocked. "But what about our classes??" 

            "Just keep practicing, dear." Shin'yo nodded to him. "By the time I've come back, you will have at least learned how to summon your light I'm sure. And if you're not – well, that's okay. You'll just keep practicing till you get it and in the meantime, Sashimi-chan will help you – right Sashimi?"

            "Mmmhmm!" ^__^ Sashimi saluted her. 

            "Good. While I'm gone, Sashimasu will be here training Sashimi. If you want to, Yukidaruma, you may train with her and learn a bit of self defense." She waved to them as she walked down the stone steps of the shrine. The rainwater slid off of her Naru-gasa hat in little waterfalls. "Don't cause any trouble now! Behave yourselves!" and she disappeared into the forest. 

(end of flashback)~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~$$^*

            Matatabi led Shio through the forest and into a mile wide field landlocked by trees. There were tons of wild flowsers and demon morphana: the demon wild flowers that have a bloom as big as the mouth of a tuba. The demon morphana were a rainbow of beautiful colors and tantalizing scents. A beautiful yet carnivorous flower. There were birds and rabbits and a colony of fairies humming music like honeybees. 

            "Wow!" Shio said in awe, he and Matatabi exchanged excited grins, then she started unwrapping her kimono. 

            Shio was even more amazed, "What are you doing there?"

            It wasn't a moment before the air touched her bare skin when she began to transform. A thin layer of cat fur covered her body.  It was cool white with soft patches of black. She hadn't fully transformed before she turned to him and asked, "Well, what are you waiting for? Come on!" she jumped out abouve the flowers and transformed completely into her full demon cat form. 

            Shio watched her glide over the carnivorous demon flowers just like Kirara, then she dove down and bounced off of the side just before it closed trying to catch her. 

            "Cool!" Shio began to remove his jacket/shirt as a layer of thick silverish-white fur spread up his back. 

--------------*

            "Ah-TIEU!" 

            BLING!

            Happy place, happy place, Sumiko was in her happy place! ^___^

            She had finally figured out where her vitolitto was! ^__^

            All she had to do was collect the necessary ingredients for boiling inscents, get older, have a séance, be possessed become endowed with the compass of life, find a doorway between life and death and pull it out! ^___^ SIMPLE!!! 

            She had collected the ingredients for inscents which she carried in her sash. As she walked back into the village, she saw Shippou spread out in the grass looking slightly ill. Though he wasn't as ill as when Miroku left him.

            She came over and asked, "Is Shippou-chan okay?"

            He groaned and glanced at her through half lidded eyes. 

            "Yeah, I'm fine considering I just had a near death experience with a piece of bread."

            "Ooooooo!" Sumiko said interestedly. She tossed the sash of ingredients aside and kneeled beside him. "Do tell, baby fox!" 

            He sat up giving her the puppy dog eyes as he used hand gestures to explain. "I saw a white lifht at the end of a long tunnel! I saw my Pa! He was glorious! My life flashed before my eyes! … It was a lot like a commercial for mentos actually…"

            Suddenly Sumiko sat up straight and alert. The sensor on her Sin-o-meter was ticking. She jumped back up grabbed her bag of ingredients and dashed into the village.

            "Oooooooooooooooooooooooohhh…."

"Uuuuggghhhhhhhh…." 

            Inu Yasha gripped Kagome's wrists and held them tight against the floor. Her hands contracted like claws gropingly. 

            He nuzzed through her hair till he found the hot skin of the back of her neck which he licked and nibbled to get a few satisfying moans out of her. He made a snake like motion with his tongue and she moaned louder arching her backside up and into him. Yes, Inu Yasha was beginning to love his fatherhood more and more with the moment.  If he wasn't already busy, he would be wondering why he didn't accept it sooner. Steam and little heart floated out from under the bottom crack of the door. Sumiko ran into the hut so fast that the straw door covering ripped clean off of where it hung and rested over her head. 

            Inu Yasha and Kagome separated in a millisecond. 

            Sumiko yanked the straw covering off of her head and made a quick scan of the room. Kagome was on one side of the room laughing nervously and fluffing her hair and adjusting her skirt. Inu Yasha was still a bit shaken from Sumiko's abrupt entrance and was wiping the sweat from his face trying to look natural. 

            "Oh my goodness." Sumiko said in a state of disbelief.

            "Sumiko!" Kagome jumped up and ran over to give her a nice little hug which didn't sway Sumiko at all. 

"Hi!" Kagome chimed happily with a large smile plastered on her face. "How are you?! Are you well?! We didn't do anything – how's Shippou-chan?"

Sumiko looked down at Inu Yasha then back up at her.

"Oh – my – goodness!" she went past Kagome and picked up Inu Onna who looked soared and confused. Sumiko glared at them. "What kind of horrible parents are you?! Did you forget that your daughter was in the samw room as you?! Or did you not think this would scar her for life?! How would you like one of her first memories to be of her parents getting intimate while she was trying to take a nap?! I can't believe you people!!" 

Sumiko tossed Inu Yasha out the front door then she tossed Kagome out on top of him. Then she stood in the doorway and waved her fist at them. "Go rut in the forest like the animals that you are!" 

She would've slammed the door on them, but there was no door to slam.

Kagome climbed off of Inu Yasha and the two of them sat there staring at Kaede's hut where Sumiko rocked their baby and tried to save what innocence she had left.

"You know what?" Inu Yasha suddenly stated. "In our own attempt to screw each other, all we accomplished was screwing the mind of our offspring."

Kagome nodded in agreement before asking, "Wanna try again?"

"Lets." They jumped each other with passionate kisses. Inu Yasha once again seized dominance. It wasn't until half a minute later when a small voice in the back of Inu's head reminded him that they were out in the open in the middle of the dirt. "Mmm – hold on, hold on," he said between kisses. "We need – to find – a hut."

-

The samuri leaned against the wall and pulled out the wanted poster of Shio. The samurai stared at the bishi's picture for a few moments in deep thought before sighing and tracing the outline of Shio's face in the picture. 

Suddenly there came a loud thud as if something landed on top of the roof. Then the thing landed on the gravel outside then stomed over to appear at the door. 

Inu Yasha stooped forward gripping the doorframe with both hands. Kagome clung to his back, hugging him, moaning and planting kisses all over his neck like she couldn't wait anymore. 

The samuri looked up at them bewildered.

Inu Yasha looked intensly up at the samurai, "We _need_ this hut!" 

Without another word, the samuri was pushed out the door and that was that. The samuri stood out there, still bewildered and confused as heck.

Steam and little hearts floated out from under the door.

The samuri glared at the hut then stomped away muttering something about "damn bitches". 

-

Meanwhile, Shio was actually having fun on his date. Matatabi flew high into the air till she almost touched the clouds then dive bombed toward the largest demon morphana in the field. She hit the rim with her forepaws and sprang back into a flip. The demon flower snapped shut. It reopened in annoyance when it realized it only grabbed a mouthful of air. Matatabi laughed then looked up as a shadow passed over her. A great white dog demon slightly bigger then Kirara flew up into the air even high then Matatabi flew. It was like a bright white, thick furred golden retriever with nine glorious tails. Then it dropped down like a shot and bounced off the rim of the flower. Then he did a spin twist in the air, caught the cat demoness in his arms and they twirled laughing histerically as they fell into a pile of leaves. Shio lay on top of her and she hugged him from her bottom position, the two of them half transformed. Shio pushed some of the hair out of face and they looked into each other's eyes. He began to go in for a kiss when his ears twitched to the sound of an approaching person. 

He looked up to see a cat demon man. A very tall, muscular half transformed yet clothed cat demon man standing over the two of them with his arms crossed. Shio squinted.

"Oh hi, Jitsuta!" Matatabi said. She got out from under Shio and the two of them stood up. She smiled at the intruder then at Shio, "Shio this is my big brother Jitsuta! Jitsuta this is that really hot guy I told you I was going out with!" 

Shio looked up at Jitsuta. The guy towered over him by at least two feet. His head blocked the sun. 

Matatabi crossed her arms. "Why don't I go get our clothes, Shio and we'll go listen to that mariatchi band back in that one restaurant near my hotel, you'll love em!" she skipped off leaving Shio with Jitsuta.

Shio looked up at him and Jitsuta looked down at him with cold eyes. Shio shivered and rubbed his arms feeling like the air just dropped a few degrees. "Hey, sup' Jitsuta!" he held out his hand. "Hey!" 

Jitsuta looked down at him not accepting the handshake. "Who are you fooling?" he asked.

Shio blinked not knowing what he was talking about. "What?"

Jitsuta reached out and plapped a large meaty hand on Shio's shoulder. Shio's eyes widened feeling like his shoulder was gonna pop out of joint. "Listen buddy boy," Jitsuta started, "I know what your after."

Shio was confused, "You do? I-"

"And let me tell you something-" Jitsuta grabbed a handful of loose skin and white fur located on the back of Shio's neck and lifted him off of the grass. Since Shio was half transformed he had that loose skin, otherwise that would have hurt. Though Jitsuta was showing a lot of tension in the grip of the skin. Shio made a sound through his teeth of the pinching pain and he looked at Jitsuta confused. The scary big brother continued, "If you try anything funny with my sister, I will make you into the tightest pretzel that was ever twisted, Kapeesh?" 

Shio nodded quickly, not wanting to be a pretzel or any other form of grain source. 

The Jitsuta dropped him on the ground and walked off. 

Shio sat on the ground like a good boy and gave a heavy sigh. 


	23. Assult

_Disclaimer:_

_[There's a dark room full of bishi's with spotlights on them. Each are tied to their own chair – gagged and tied that is; some with spell scrolls to keep them from moving. A pair of eyes that look like "^  ^" pop up in front of the screen. The person backs up and it appears to be Jakotsu doing an excellent impression of a gay police officer…..Well impression or not, he is dressed like one at least…..with tight pants….]_

_[Jakotsu: *interesting stance, similar to one of Shio's postures* First off, ^_^ I would like to thank Scorpiogal for giving me the opportunity to live my fantasy! Gentlemen! ^_^ *he spins on his heal to face the bishis and gives them an evil grin* Welcome to my nightmare!]_

_[Bishis: *shiver, cringe, whimper, and shrink into their chairs in fear*]_

_[Jakotsu: *goes over to Inu Yasha who is tied up and gagged and smiles down at him with his hands on his hips*]_

_[Inu Yasha: *looks up at him as if to say "You'd better keep off my property you friggn' queer!"*]_

_[Jakotsu: *glances over his shoulder to give the readers a cat-like grin* Second, I'm sad to say that Scorpiogal is in fact not in possession of the series of "Inu Yasha". She said that if she were the owner, she would have given me a real yaori moment with Inu Yasha before I died - *he looks around before adding* - again…..]_

_[Inu Yasha: *glares at him and sweatdrops*]_

_[Bishis: *scared out of their friggn' heterosexual minds*]_

_[Jakotsu: However!__ *Jakotsu sits on Inu Yasha's lap sidesaddle style, puts an arm around Inu's shoulders and strokes the guys chin* She does own the right to free speech! ^___^]_

_[Inu Yasha: *Eyes widen in horror*]_

_[Jakotsu: *laughs evilly* Damn I love __America__! ^___^ God bless it!]_

_[*There's a knock at the door*]_

_[Jakotsu: Oh fudgie, who could that be? *gets up and walks over to see who it is*]_

_[Inu Yasha: *sighs and his eyes roll back as he thanks god* T T]_

_[Jakotsu: *Opens the door and there stands the writer herself!* Scorpia! ^__^ How are you?]_

_[Scorpiogal: ^__^ Hi!__ I'm fine! *they pretend to kiss each other on each cheek* How's my favorite character?]_

_[Jakotsu: Oh I'm great! ^_^ I was just about to start the "interrogation" too!]_

_[Scorpiogal: Oh!__ Well hey, don't let me stop ya', big guy! ^__^]_

_[Bishis: *crestfallen because they thought she was there to save them*]_

_[Scorpiogal: Oh wait, yeah, I did come to pick up _my_ baby though. You don't mind do you?]_

_[Jakotsu: I guess not. As long as I get to keep the rest of em'! ^_^]_

_[Scorpiogal: ^_^ Of course!__ *cranes her neck to try and spot him* You didn't convert him yet, did ya'?]_

_[Jakotsu: Nope!__ ^_^ The little bugger remains straight, they're so fussy you know?]_

_[Scorpiogal: Yeah, he's always been stubborn. *Eyes widen and she points* There! I see him over there!]_

_[Shio: *tied up and gagged like the rest of them but he's looking over at her with very large dialated pupils. The emotion is undeterminable*]_

_[Scorpiogal: *comes over* Hey there sweetie! ^_^ Did you have a fun time with Jakotsu?]_

_[Shio: *shakes his head and almost spins his head off in the prossess. He  moves his jaw as if trying to get the gag off*]_

_[Scorpiogal: *pulls the gag down*]_

_[Shio: *takes a deep breath then starts* What the hell is wrong with you?! Leaving me with a vicious homo like that?!?! I thought the contract was tight with you-]_

_[Scorpiogal: Oo Contract?!__ I didn't know you had a con-]_

_[Shio: Yeah, I know you don't! . And What's with all of the dates you've been putting me through lately?!? They were completely pointless! While I did get a ton of kinky moments, I think you've scared me for life! By the way, you are so paying for my therapy! I think I'm gonna-!]_

_[Scorpiogal: Anyway!__ ^_^ *puts the gag back on him* Thanks for watching him for me Jakotsu! ^_^ *she lifts Shio still gagged and tied in his chair over her shoulder* Have fun! ^_^ Try not to spend all your mojo in one place, okie? ^_^]_

_[Jakotsu: Okay! ^_^ Thanks! *turns back to his bishis with an evil grin that he had earlier*]_

_[*The bishi's watch Scorpiogal walk out the door with heavy hearts. Inu Yasha's eyebrow goes into a tick as he can't stop looking at the door, Kouga breaks down into tears, Sesshomaru and Miroku begin to pray to themselves silently, Hiei struggles but only shakes the chair a little bit, Kurama twists his neck trying to give himself the sleep hold, Trunks whimpers and begans to think of who he will leave his possessions to, Mr. Clean hopes he'll go with the guys with the longest hair first, Nightcrawler looks constipated trying to make himself teleport out of the room but sadly for him his bindings won't let him, Gohan is asleep, TukedoMask gulps and tries to find a happy place, Johnny Depp is trying to break the spotlight light bulb with his mind so that he can do his infamous Houdini trick, Orlando Bloom shoots a worried gaze to Elijah Wood who gives a worried look to Hotsuma who glares dubiously at Jakotsu.*]_

_[Scorpiogal carries Shio down the hallway over her shoulder, still tied up.]_

_[Shio: T T]_

_[Scorpiogal: ^_^ Don't worry precious, you'll find your mate – someday.]_

_[Shio: T T]_

_[Scorpiogal: ^_^ You know what they say: "Every dog has his day!"]_

_[Shio: Eyes widen when he realizes what she's really saying and glares at her.]_

_[Scorpiogal: ^_^ hmhmhmhmhm…*looks upward thoughtfully* Gee, I wonder how much you would sell for on ebay when your like this.]_

_[Shio: T T *growls irritatedly*]_

_----------------------------------------------------------_

Chapter 22. Assault 

            Sumiko tore an origami letter fold envelope wide open. Salt sized crystals spilled out and into the fire. She dropped the envelope in after it, circled the fire three times with her arms spread out like a bird. Naraku sat near by, he picked his toes and sniffed his fingers, not really interested in what she was doing. Though the question had crossed his mind of why she had chosen to do her bonfire spell ritual on top of a cliff. 

            She sat on the calves or her legs and brought her hands up in prayer. Then she nodded her head forward and closed her eyes. A few moments passed by. Naraku was getting rather bored and kinda hungry. It made him wonder how long this was gonna take. 

            Sumiko opened her eyes expressionlessly. They were pooled in white light. She slowly stood up as if she were going in slow motion. Then without warning, she ran forward and jumped off of the cliff. Naraku shot up and ran over to the side. She had swan dived head first and was falling fast.  He looked around quickly, closed his eyes aggravated, and jumped off after her. 

            For some reason not known to Naraku or the writer who is bad with physics, he was able to catch up to her and he threw his arms and legs and her leg and clenched his eyelids shut. 

            Sumiko began to glow with a bright unnatural light. She twirled and opened her eyes wide open. They were bright as the sun and just as amazing. The light around her body spread around her arms into enormous wings. She pulled up at the last moment and flew off over the trees, possessed by the light itself. 

-

            Catnip leaves scattered over the dirt. Kirara scampered over in kitty form, took one sniff, and began rolling around in the dirt on her back. Sango dusted off her hands and watched her kitty get high. "Well, I guess this means you'll be needing a bath later." She said, imagining the fuss Kirara would make. If there was anything she knew about demon cats, it was that they hated the water just as much as mortal cats. 

            "Excuse me, Miss," 

            Sango turned around in time to see an approaching samurai. A rather cute one too. Kirara stood up in the magic leaves and hissed at the samuri. 

            The samuri gave the kitty a casual glance but proceeded to pull a piece of parchment out of the left boot. "Have you seen this man?"

            Sango took the parchment handed to her. Bold Black kanji spelling '**WANTED**' across the top of the page was a real eye catcher. Ditto to the well drawn colorized cartoon picture of Shio's portrait. 

            Wanted for a price with more zeros then there were letters in Sango's name. Wanted alive or no reward. Wanted runaway concubine, wanted for attacking government figures, wanted for criminal insanity. 

            Sango gulped and looked up at the samuri who stood waiting patiently for a response. "I – no! I haven't seen 'em." Sango replied as dumb as she could sound. She turned to leave, but she had failed in perjury. 

            The samuri grabbed her forearm forcefully. Sango gasped and turned to see an unimpressed face. 

            "That was a lie!" the samuri declared. "Tell me where and when you last saw him!" 

            "I've never seen him before!" Sango tried to rip her arm away but this samuri had some kind of kung fu grip.

            The samuri yanked her closer, grabbed the neck of her robes and slammed her back against a tree. Sango froze as she felt the blade of a dagger align with her esophagus. 

            The samuri's face became so close to hers, that they were almost touching noses. Sango's pupils dialated to refocus themselves on those dark eyes. "I know when you're lying, Girly," the samuri threatened, "I'm a living lie detector, so you'd better tell me what you know,"

            Kirara growled and transformed into her larger form. She jumped, ready to snap the samuri like a twig. 

            The samuri's eyes narrowed. Spinning around, the dagger flew and nicked the demon cat across the snout. Kirara howled while Sango took this opportunity to draw her sword. The samuri heard the metal draw out and ducked before the sword hilt could collide with the helmut. They separated far from drop kick distance and stood in fighting stances. 

            Kirara detransformed and lay on the ground in kitty form crying in pain. Sango gasped, "Kirara!" then she frowned at the samuri. "What did you do to her?!" 

            The samuri held up the dagger which had made a cut so small, so quickly, that it didn't take any blood with it. "A special poison. If you want her to have the antidote, you'd better tell me what you know of him – that man, Shio."

             Sango looked down at Kirara worriedly. The samuri had chosen the moment to attach just after she had successfully lost Miroku. She also was without her boomerang. Just her sword, a few poisonous bombs, and two other hidden blades…

            Sango held up her sword. "I don't have to tell you anything!" She would take the samuri down, then she would take the antidote for Kirara.

~~~~~~~(flashback)~~~~~~~*********

            It had been three days since Shin'yo had started her adventure into the wilderness. She had passed the map checkpoints quicker then she thought she would. She had told her students and her best friend very little about where she was going. She didn't mind lying to her students; she would just inform them once she returned. But lying to Sashimasu, she had felt guilty for since she got the idea to leave. 

            It just so happened that the pure light was made of four souls – just like every other thing! But the pure light only had three souls so it wasn't complete. She already knew that the pure light was created from the great friendship that she and Sashimasu possessed. But recently, she found that there were other components in the mix. Sashimasu was the one who added the soul of strength from her physical and spiritual body. Shin'yo herself was the one who added the soul of courage. What was needed was the soul of love.

            What confused Shin'yo was the fact that the fourth soul hadn't been added when Sashimi was born. Sashimi was born from Sashimasu and her boyfriend's love, so she would have inherited the other components from her mother along with the love from both parents. Then it dawned on Shin'yo on the second day of her quest – Sashimi _was _born with all of the components! But unfortunately the four souls had to be extracted from her before she was born, or else they would remain inside of her. 

            Shin'yo felt guilty for not telling Sashimasu that she was leaving. For one, she had no idea _how _she was going to mix the four souls once she found Sashimasu's boyfriend, or how she would explain to him that she needed it. 

            And for some reason, she had a dark feeling inside that she shouldn't have gone to see him by herself. She wasn't sure why, probably because if Sashimasu learned that Shin'yo wasn't just "going on a journey of knowledge and meditation", but going to see her husband, she probably wouldn't like that. Sashimasu would more then likely become suspicious then the pure light would be without the friendship soul and they would have to work longer and harder to find that one as well. 

            Shin'yo had to make sure he was the correct boyfriend as well. More then once had she met a man who pretended he was someone else. What made her feel really stupid was the fact that she had no idea what Sashimasu's boyfriend looked like. Shin'yo wished to herself that her friend had introduced him sooner so she wouldn't have to play detective games to find the correct guy. 

             Shin'yo wiped the sweat off the back of her neck with a cloth. It was 99 degrees outside, and she had been walking up some huge hill for what seemed like hours in the summer heat. When she got to the top of the hill she had found a mansion and thankfully a rest spot. She dropped what she was carrying and fell to her knees in the shade of a tree. She took a drink of water and decided to analyze the mansion as she sat there. It wasn't as arboreal looking as her and Sashimasu's mansion, but it was very nice all the same. A lighter color of wood was used in making the walls and screens. There were small gardens and round bushes in front to keep the land from eroding and taking the house down with it. It was a pretty nice summer home. Her sharp ears suddenly picked up a sound coming from the back of the house. Battle cries. 

            Though there were only two voices so it was probably one of the top dog classes that Shin'yo had heard so much about. Finally, ready to get up and overcome with excitement to see Sashimasu's man, Shin'yo picked herself up and started for the backyard. The backyard had an even bigger garden then the front, but less of a steep climb. There was a large white-tiled battle area, with two fighters in the ring. Both had the trademark silver hair of dog demons as well as armor with a white under kimono. Once had short silver hair, the other kept his hair in a silky ponytail. Both were beautiful with pointed chins and smooth complexions. The one with the short hair had only two stripes on his cheeks, but his opponent had the stripes and a crescent moon on his forehead. The one with the crescent moon had golden eyes, and the one with the short hair had blue eyes. The crescent moon man dodged an attack by the man with the blue eyes. He swept his hand back like he was going to slap him then a long golden string of light whipped from the tips of his claws – aimed at the blue eyed man. The blue eyed man held his arm up in a block. The whip curled around it with a snap. The blue eyed man grabbed part of the whip, pulled and tossed the crescent moon man with his whip over his shoulder and across the arena. The crescent moon man landed on his feet and sucked the whip back in. Then the silver haired man jumped into the air, swung his outstretched had and shouted, "_Silverfire__ claw_!" 

            Arrow shaped flames of silver wizzed through the air. The crescent moon man barely dodged them. Then they both charged each other and through their claws at each other at the same time shouting in unison, "_Iron Rever Soul Stealer_!" There was a flash of light. They both landed across from each other, then the crescent moon man fell to his knee. He cupped his hand over his shredded sleeve. When he looked at his hand, it was dripping from the blood on his arm. "Good god, Shicho! Must you rip me apart everyday!" he complained looking at the blue eyed man. 

            The blue eyed man gave a gorgeous winners grin and replied, "Well Inu Taishio, if you'd just block better I wouldn't have to bloody you up all the time!" He walked over and helped him up. "Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow bright and early, practice if you can, drink plenty of water." With a cocky grin he added, "And maybe meditate on how to not block like a little human girl." 

            Inu Taishio laughed then punched him in the arm, "I do not block like a little human girl!" 

            They carried on like buddies and when Inu Taishio finally left, Shicho began to walk toward his mansion. What was supposed to happen was that he was supposed to go inside, take off his shirt, get drunk and fall asleep. That's what always happened after work. But something different happened this time. A strange young woman stepped out of the foliage surrounding his big backyard. As he saw her he started to slow down as if she were a yield-and-stare sign. They both stopped a far distance away from each other. 

            She was overheated in the summer weather, making her cheeks a zealous tint of red and her hair separated in various places from sweat. He thought it was one of the most adorable things he had ever seen! And it only made him wonder how she reacted in winter weather. Her face flushed from the cold, her nose colored reddish-pink…. 

            Shin'yo whipped her forehead, panting from the heat. Was it just her, or was it twice as hot in the backyard then on the steep of the hill?

            Shicho gulped and shifted his feet a bit. How it was possible he did not know, but this woman was the most erotic creature he'd ever laid eyes on. "Can I help you?" He asked with a slight eagerness in his voice. Shin'yo's vision blurred a bit. "I – I'm…" and she had a heatstroke. 

---(end flashback)~~~~~~~~**********/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//\/\/\/\


	24. Osuwari!

^____________^ I am in my happy place! Ironically, I always start a chapter while I'm in my happy place….

Chapter 23: Osuwari!!

            Well one advance that Sango had, was that the samuri only had a dagger (or so appeared to only have a dagger), and she had a sword. She knew by experience that people who carry daggers are tricky and like to use the element of surprise. She had a feeling that the samuri was smart enough to come better prepared when going against a demon exterminator. Sango would just have to watch where the samuri's hands went. She lunged forward and swung her sword. The samuri took a step back and with amazing accuracy and speed, blocked a sword blow with a three inch dagger blade. Sango didn't stop to be amazed though, she went for the next blow. Blocked again. 

            She began attacking in fury sweeps. Each blow was blocked, and the samuri didn't break a sweat. Sango was using the most advanced sword techniques she could remember. This samuri was obviously very wise and experienced. Perhaps even a very old demon in the form of a young samuri. 

            "What'cha thinkin' about?" the samuri smiled and asked.

            Sango's eyes widened slightly and she leapt back. The samuri continued to smile but didn't make a move to attack her. 

            _'How stupid of me!'_ Sango mentally kicked herself. _'He hasn't attacked me at all this whole time! Why? Is he analyzing my moves?? Is he waiting for me to tire out??? I don't think I've read enough Manga to know!!!'_

            "I see you like to become well prepared too!" the samuri called to her.

            "What?" Sango asked.

            Suddenly the samuri darted forward with the speed of a wolf and drew the dagger up. 

            FWSH! FWSH! FWSH! FWSH! 

            Sango saw multiple flashes of light, they went by so fast. And somehow the samuri had gone back to the same spot from before the attack. "I knew it." The samuri declared. "You have two hidden blades on each arm," 

            The sleeves and cloth wrapped around Sango's arms practically desintagrated. They fell apart in shreds and landed in the grass below. 

            "You also have poisonous fume bombs, a few daggers of your own – and if I were you, I'd fine some better silk fabrics to wear." Right at the word "wear", The blue cloth pack she had tied around her waist ripped open causing all of her little exterminator toys to fall out. The bell of her kimono ripped halfway on the side of her left leg and right leg along with the cloth that held two daggers in sheath, the front of her blouse ripped slightly and another sheathed dagger fell out. Sango sunk to the ground in order to hold the rest of her kimono together. As soon as she hit the grass, her hair tie split in half. 

_Oh shit, _she thought. 

"So," the samuri asked. "Do you surrender?" 

Sango looked crestfallen. She looked over at Kirara who had passed out from the poison. If she gave up, Kirara might die! But she knew she was outmatched, and she also knew that if she stood up she would end up kimono-less. 

"Let me ask this way then," the samuri started. "If you surrender, you and your kitty cat won't have to die, I'll give you a new kimono  and you'll be on your way as soon as I get the information. Or you can choose not to surrender, fight in your birthday suit, eventually loosing and dying and meeting your cat in death."

Sango glared and blushed flusteredly.

The samuri shrugged and smiled, "Your choice not mine, Luv."

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-(flashback thingie-majiger)

            When Shin'yo woke up, she found herself no longer in the great outdoors. She felt tired….and still a bit warm. Her vision was a bit blurry but she could tell there was a roof over her head and a futon against her back. Her sharp ears picked up the sound of footsteps and a nearby screen door opening. Shicho walked in with a couple cloth bags filled with ice under his arms. He closed the screen door with the heel of his foot and walked over. 

            Shin'yo moaned from the heat she felt in her head. 

            Shicho shushed her as he spread her arms out in a "T" shape to her body. "Don't worry, you just got a little overheated out there."

            Shin'yo gasped as he placed a bag of ice over each of her armpits. He chuckled at her discomfort. "You know it's not good to walk around wearing four layers of kimono during the hottest day of the year." He placed a small bag of ice against her neck. 

            "Luckily my wife taught me how to treat heatstroke and other summer pleasures." He grinned to himself. Shin'yo was still a bit dazed and confused. She really didn't feel like browsing through her immense mental library of medical information. 

            Suddenly he spread her legs. 

            Shin'yo's eyes widened for a brief second, but her first assumption was only half right. 

            Yes, he did get a good look at that spot (covered by dress), but the real reason he opened her legs was so that he could put the last ice pack over that spot. Her eyes opened even wider. He couldn't help but laugh at that. "Yeah, that'll wake ya' up, won't it?!" He laughed again and shook his head. Shin'yo's saucer sized eyes turned slowly to look at him. 

            The blue – eyed man Shicho. He was even better looking close up. _Why did my best friends husband just put a bag of ice down there? _

He smiled down at her in amusement before asking, "So, how do you feel? Feel any better do ye'?" 

            Shin'yo nodded not taking her eyes off of him. 

            "That's good." He smiled down at her caringly. "I don't get many visitors, and it would be a shame to let a lovely lady like you go into shock." He reached out and pushed a lock of light brown hair away from her face, then played with it.

            Shin'yo was pretty sure her face was red from the sun, but if it wasn't…

            "By the look of you – you must be some type of aristocrat, eh? Go on! Tell of your travels Ms…."

            "Ha." Shin'yo said.

            "Ms. Ha?" 

            "Ha Shin'yo," She tilted her chin a bit without realizing it, giving herself a coy, pouty look. "Fox demoness, enchanter, healer, botanist." 

            (AN: "Ha" means leaf. So her name would be "Leaf Trust." ^^) 

            "He looked amazed which also made her feel like blushing. "I'm Aka Shicho: Dog demon, warrior, sex god, Top Dog. That's a mighty long resume Ms. Ha Shin'yo."

            "_Miss_ Ha Shin'yo." She corrected him. Lord knows why….

            He nodded still smiling, "_Miss_ Ha Shin'yo – I see…" 

-----------------{End flashback thingie-thing]~~~~~~~%%******

(AN: ^______________^ Hmmm…so much sexual tension in one setting…)

-

            The door to the little hut swung wide open. A wave of hot oxygen spilled out from the opening as two lovers walked out. Inu Yasha and Kagome. Kagome and Inu Yasha. Ka Yasha. Inuome. Ben lo. 

            They came out together, grinning like teenagers, with their hands in each other's back pants pockets. Kagome was in sunshine and buttercups; she was in between girly fantasies and thoughts, big fat grins and sweet, adoring glances, and teeny little giggles that are so sweet, you're afraid that if you get to close you'll get diabetes. 

            Inu Yasha was in his high platform of happiness too. Felt all manly and stuff. A bit tired, but he felt really happy and like the top dog! ^_~ Strangely, he also felt really manly and at the same time like a playful little puppy. 

            They stopped and he gave her a big bear hug, lifting her feet off of the ground. Kagome hugged back and lifted her legs so that they bent in a "V" shape. Inu Yasha put his face in the top of her hair, purred and giggled, "I luv yu, Kagome!" =^_______^=

            "I luv yu tu, Inu Yasha – sama!" =^_______^= 

            They both giggled and spun around a little bit in their happy little world. 

            Sango had on a new kimono. A very plain one that went knee length. The samuri made her get rid of the rest of her kimono – shreaded or not. At least she was aloud to change in private. Of course, Kirara was practically held at knife point to make sure Sango came back. The samuri patted her down to make sure she didn't have any more hidden weapons or stored tricks; then her wrists were tied together above and behind her head to the arm of a tree. Her feet were tied together, while the other end of the rope wrapped around a good sized rock. Roughly the size of her own head. The samuri then sat down on the ground next to the pain demon cat in order to tie her up too. Though Sango thought it was quite plain that Kirara was hurting to much to do anything that would require chaining her to a big boulder. 

            Sango glared at the back of the Samuri's head. "So – what do you plan on doing with us?" 

            The samuri looked back at the nervous and angered look on her face. Sango had to throw disgust into the mix. When she saw the cold, uninterested look on the samurai's face, it filled her with hate – especially since it reminded her so much of Naraku. The samuri snorted at her emotions and turned back to the square knots. "Peh, you look like you think I'm gonna rape you or something."

            Sango's skin pricked causing her shoulders to move up nearer to her ears. 

            "Whatever." The samuri growled. "It's not _you_ that I'm after anyway." 

            Well it's not that Sango wasn't glad about that; but she still had to get free. 

            The samuri stepped back to admire the job well done. Kirara looked weak and pale. She was even shivering at the feeling of the rope gripping against her fur. She let out a pitiful mew. 

            Sango felt for her. Hopefully her kitty could survive long enough for her to find a way to get free. 

            The samuri suddenly got out some funny plant with weird leaves. The samuri ripped it down the middle of the stalk and bit off the lining of the leaves. The leaf and exposed insides of the shoot began to bleed a light green gel. The samuri folded the half of stalk of one piece in half and squeezed it over Kirara's face. A droplet of the goo slowly seeped off and landed on the kitty's nose, over the cut. Kirara made a sound indicating that she did not like its strong smell. The samuri placed one of the smaller leaves over it and left it like that. 

-

            Shippou blew on a small red berry and it lit with a small crimson flame. He blew it again onto the floor of the hut and it became a miniature version of Miroku. Inu Onna stared at it wide eyed and backed away cautiously. Shippou smiled at her. Then looked at his other berry creations. Three berry people who were made to look like Sango, Shippou, and Rin stood together singing, "_We all live in the yellow submarine, the yellow submarine, the yellow submarine," _

            Off a few inches, Sesshomaru and Kagome were river dancing to the tune. The Miroku berry person stood with the Inu Yasha and Shio berry person and speculated. They mostly speculated the dancing Kagome image. 

            Inu Onna inched forward slowly on all fours watching the berry people for sudden movements. She reached out with her hand bent like a paw and nudged the Inu Yasha berry person, whom fell over and made an 'omph!' sound. Inu Onna jerked back and yipped. 

            Shippou couldn't contain his giggles. Sitting next to Inu Onna was a hologram that Sumiko had left of herself. It looked exactly like her elven year old self, except she had a crown of berries tied together at the stems on her head. And every once in a while she would stutter when she said something. She smiled and patted Inu Onna on the back. Inu Onna looked up at her nervously.

"Don't fret-fret, Puppy child!" Sumiko hologram said. "Berry people don't hurt y-you, lookie!" Sumiko reached out grabbed the Miroku berry person and held it up by it's leg. 

Inu Onna looked at the wriggling berry Miroku horrified, as if it were a banana spider dangling by its leg. 

(AN: Most deadly spider I know of! _)

The pup screamed, whacked the berry Miroku out of her hand and hid her face in her arms on the floor crying. The berry Miroku flew through the air and hit the wall, splattering red berry juice everywhere. 

"Oh!" Sumiko hugged her. "Sumiko sor-sor-sorry puppy child! It's o-okay!" 

It was too late for apologies! Inu Onna was mad at Sumiko for holding that scary bug that looked like that tall guy in front of her face. Right now, all Inu Onna wanted was her mommy and daddy – wherever _they_ were. 

Shippou sweatdropped, but soon resumed playing with the berry people. He looked at the Kagome berry person and told her, "Go sit, him!" he pointed at the Inu Yasha berry who's eyes widdened at this command. 

Sumiko set Inu Onna down so she could watch. The Kagome image walked over and pointed at the little dog boy image. She shouted in a chipmunk voice, "Osuwari!" 

TAP! 

It made a sound like someone dropping a rock on the sand. 

Inu Onna knew that word and she said aloud to herself, "Owa…"

Shippou giggled. He loved when Kagome did that to the big muke. "Do it again."

The little Inu Yasha image shook his head pleadingly, but the little Kagome image didn't hesitate to do it again, "Osuwari!" 

TAP! 

Inu Onna listened to it again, "Owasa…"

Shippou giggled. "Do it again!" 

"Osuwari!" 

TAP!!

Inu Onna consentrated, "Owasorri…."

Shippou laughed out loud, he couldn't get enough of it! ^_^ "Do it again!" 

"Osuwari, Osuwari! Osuwari!"

TAP! TAP! TAP!

Shippou fell backwards laughing his head off as a little inu yasha shaped hole about the size of a gingerbread man appeared in the floor. 

"Osuwari!!" 

Shippou froze with his legs in the air. He stopped laughing and his eyes grew wide. 

Sumiko looked densely at Inu Onna. 

The image Kagome kneeled sympathetically over the Inu Yasha shaped mark in the ground. 

Inu Onna looked from the images to Shippou and barked, "Osuwari!" 

-

            The samuri reached into a small brown pack and pulled out a decorative vial of transparent orange liquid. The samuri opened it and poured it into a flat dish. 

            Sango scrunched up her nose as the smell of really cheap perfume hit her nostrils. 

            "Mmm, smell that?" the samuri asked her. "Smells like freshly cut flowers sprinkled over a babbling brook with a hint of lemon." The samuri then went back into the brown pack and pulled out a shikon shard. 


	25. Waaaaaaaay too easy

_[Disclaimer:]_

_[Scorpiogal is sitting on top of a tall thin rock whaling loudly. Kagome, Sango, Ayame, Rin, Sumiko and Shippou sat on the grass bellow the rock, playing cards.The girls are still in their outfits, but they're not wearing their men this time.]_

_[Sango: *rips a card in half*]_

_[Kagome: Ah gee, Sango!__ That was the third card you've ripped!]_

_[Sango: *bristles testily and glares up at Scorpiogal* She's really starting to get on my nerves*]_

_[Ayame: Starting to? *starts drawing up a replacement 8 of spades*]_

_[Shippou: Ah let her cry, what's the big deal? *drops his discards in the deck*]_

_[Kagome: You know, you really shouldn't get worked up over it like that, it was just a few criticisms! *says up to Scorpiogal*]_

_[Scorpiogal: It still hurt my feelings!! *choaked up, looks at readers and says* I don't own Inu Yasha or any of those other characters that Rumiko had copyrighted, but I do own a bunch of useless OC's apparently. I know that chapter before last was short and mostly filled with disclaimer and OC story, but I hadn't updated in a long time and I thought you just wanted to see what I had so far in my writers block. *looks down at the girls* Isn't a short chapter better then no chapter at all? ;_;]_

_[Female character: *mixed comments and mumblings*]_

_[Scorpiogal: I have those flashbacks for a reason you know. If anyone cares at all, it's leading up to how Shio came to be, why Sashimi's mom is no longer alive, and a very important piece of information that will determine the stories plotline. _

_            You don't have to read it if you still find it useless and boring and stupid and a complete waist of your time and others…..just don't tell me it sucks, Ja?]_

-------------------------------

Chapter 24: Waaaaay too easy

            Inu Yasha became alert. A new smell hit his nose and he turned his head to determine where it was coming from. 

            "What's wrong?" Kagome asked. 

            He sniffed rather noticeably, "I can smell fresh cut flowers sprinkled over a babbling brook with a hint of lemon." 

-

            Sango scrunched up her nose and stuck out her tongue at the aweful smell of the overwhelming fragrance. "Ugh! What is that rancid stench?!" 

            The samuri glowered at her disrespect, "I happen to like the smell – it belonged to my mother, thank you very much!" 

            "Bleh!" Was Sango's only reply. Enough of this would give anybody brain damage! All of a sudden, Inu Yasha landed in the scene with Kagome on his back. 

            The samuri glanced at him. "Who the hell are you?"

            Inu Yasha kept his sleeve over his nose. Right away he noticed the shikon shard in the saucer. "So that's where that god forsaken smell was coming from." 

            The samuri got fed up, "Look, it's Sweet Honesty, okay?!? No run along little hanyo, before I smite you! _I'm_ looking for a _real_ demon!" 

            "I ain't leavin' till you free Sango, you bastard!" Inu Yasha growled. 

            "Why would I let _her_ go?" the samuri asked and extanded a hand in Sango's direction. "She is like – the perfect bait!" 

            "What?" Inu Yasha raised an eyebrow. 

            "Female plus cat suit plus knows the guy personally!! What better bait would lure Aka Shio out of hiding!?" The samuri asked.

            "Shio?!" Kagome gasped. "_You're _after _Shio_?!" 

            "That's right, little girl!" the samuri told her with an arrogant beam. "And I aims to catch'em! Alive and Unharmed, that sucker's worth a lot of Japanese bread, baby!" 

            Inu Yasha growled and unsheathed his sword. "Don't you talk to Kagome in such a disrespectful manner!" he pointed Tetsusaiga at the samuri threateningly. "And don't you be so cocky otherwise! As long as I'm around, you cannot have Shio!" 

            The samuri gave Inu Yasha a more interested look. "Ah! So you know him too! What better bait then a woman in a catsuit, a good friend, and a slut in a short skirt."

            "Hey! I'm not a slut!" Kagome shouted. 

            "That's it!" Inu Yasha growled and charged the samuri. 

            The samuri didn't look worried at all. With the flick of a wrist, the samuri lifted the dish of perfume and tossed it's contents into Inu Yasha's face. 

            At first, the dogboy was shocked at the impact. Then the world started to spin as his over sensitive nose took him for a trip. He went swirly-eyed, made a funny sound, and fell over. 

            Sango sweatdropped, "Oh crap."

            The samuri sniffed dryly. "Please. I've been around demons long enough to know what bothers the senses of which." 

            Kagome drew an arrow from her quiver when she realized that it was up to her. (AN: The frontal lobe of my brain laughed at me for typing this.)

            She fired an arrow at the samuri. 

            The samuri turned around and caught it in one hand – then looked at like it was nothing! "Hm, fine craftsmanship." 

            Kagome gasped. Even if the arrow didn't hit, the arrow would have at least sizzled the flesh of the samuri's hands! That could only mean-

            "You're not a demon! You're a human, aren't you!" Kagome shouted. 

            The samuri tossed the arrow aside. "You're smarter then you look."

            Then the samuri pulled out a new little toy. A black cord with two daggers at each end. The samuri faced her and began to swing it around like a slingshot. 

             Kagome didn't waste any time, she dropped her bow and ran like the dickens. 

            Really all she had to do was duck. Not everyone can outrun one of these things. The cord hit her and wrapped around her waist, pinning her arms to the side and she fell forward. The daggers connected together into the shape of a four point star. 

            The samuri walked over and dragged her back. "Hmph. Too easy." 

-

            Naraku didn't know how long he had been clinging to Sumiko's leg hundreds of feet off of the ground, or how long he had his eyes closed. All he knew is that when he opened them, Sumiko had landed the both of them in a snow frosted forest that wasn't even cold. It was cool, but obviously not freezing. Lights danced around in the forest like lightening bugs. Light hung from the trees like lanterns and Christmas lights. 

            Sumiko's light wings folded and as soon as she touched the ground, Naraku slipped off of her leg and fell on his white monkey butt. 

            Sumiko's chin tilted up and a whispy white cloud drifted from her parted lips. Her eyes returned to their normal green color and she grew the thoughtless expression she usually had. The cloud became the form of a boy and solidified. If Sumiko were in her younger form, he would have been two heads taller then Sumiko with a physical form of two years older. He was glitzed up with gold and white clothes that resembled the style of an middle class peasant. He had short silver hair and golden eyes. 

            Sumiko gaped at him before saying, "Oooooooooooooooohhhh, you're pretty like Kitty!" 

            He narrowed his eyes slightly and sweatdropped. "I'm six hundred years old, girlie. Compliments from youngsters like you are creepy." He patted his clothes till he found the pocket with a solid object in it and he pulled out a platinum skeleton key. "Now by calling on a light nymph to possess you, you must be looking for some kind of heavy caliber piece of equipment am I correct?"

            "Sumiko is looking for the Vitolitto!" Sumiko cheered.

            "Sure, fine, you must need the compass of Life then." He gave an acknowledging nod as he searched for something in another pocket. He began to lead her down a dimly lit path. "I'm assuming your magic is strong enough to use this, right?" he asked.

            "Sumiko's magic strong like Kitty!" she cheered.

            Not that the boy knew who Kitty was or whether she was talking about an actual kitten, but – "And I'm also assuming your one of the Aka kids, right?" 

            "Yup! That Sumiko is!" ^___^ she grinned. She was so happy, she could hardly contain herself. 

            Then the boy walked up to a wall of slate. "Fine, yes, right here then," he stuck the key into the slate and turned a keyhole that wasn't there a moment before. He opened a storage box that had not been outlined before and pulled out a platinum lined compass with a white face that was about the size of little Naraku. The boy tossed it to her, "Here, catch."

            Sumiko caught it and it was surprisingly light. The boy closed the box and locked it up. The key hole disappeared. 

            He went over to Sumiko and pointed at the needle. "See how it works?"

            Sumiko shrugged. "Not point north."

            "No, it points in the direction of the closest doorway between life and death. Be careful when making an opening – It's that easy to get pulled into oblivion." He instructed her.

            "Wow, okay." Sumiko nodded and hung the compass around her neck like a piece of jewelery. She threw her arms around the boy and bear hugged him so hard she lifted his feet off the ground. "Thank you, nice angel boy!" ^__________^ 

            He struggled to get loose while becoming flustered. "I'm not an angel! I'm a light nymph! Let me go! You're gonna make me sterile!" 

            Sumiko set him down, saluted him, winked and went skipping off. The light nymph boy sighed still flustered, dusted off his duds and began to walk off.

            "Um….Nice angel boy?" Sumiko asked timidly. Apparently she hadn't already left.

            "I'm not an angel, what do you want?" he asked a tad annoyed as he turned to look at her.

            She laughed embarrassedly before saying, "Sumiko kinda need help finding village again."  ^^ ;;;

            The light nymph facefaulted. 

------------------------------------------------

            "Oh my god! Omigawd! OMG!!!!" Shippou could feel the wrathful hands of Inu Yasha choking him already. He was going to kill Shippou when he found out about Inu Onna's special new trick….

            "Osuwari." Inu Onna blinked innocently. 

            Hologram Sumiko didn't seem as worried as Shippou was. She leaned from side to side as she sang, "If you're happy and you know it say Osuwari!"

            "Osuwari!" Inu Onna said.

            "If you're happy and you know it say Osuwari!"

            "Osuwari!" 

            "If your happy and you know it and your face will surely show it – if you're happy and you know it say Osuwari!" 

            "Osuwari!" Inu Onna shouted. 

            "Sumiko!" Shippou cried. "Don't do that! Your driving it harder into her memory!!" T_T 

            "Sorry, baby fox." ^ ^ Sumiko said. Then she sniffed the air. "Mmm, smells like fresh cut spring flowers sprinkled over a babbling brook with a hint of lemon."

            "We gotta get her to stop saying that!" Shippou went over to Inu Onna, held her hands and made her look at him. 

            She looked at him wide eyed and displeased. _Why are you touching me?! _"Osuwari!" 

            "No, Inu Onna! Bad! Don't - say - that – word, okay?"

            "Osuwari!" 

            "Dahh! I'm dead!" T_T Shippou cried.

--------(flashback – all of you who do not care about my thoughts and feelings go ahead and skip it like you normally do….I DON"T CARE!1! T_T)*****

            The morning was fresh with wet wood and puddles welled in the indents of the road. Yukidaruma sat on a boulder stuck into the grass as he looked out over the path leading away from the temple. It had been exactly 7.5 months since Shin'yo had left on her quest – telling him to keep practicing – telling her students that she would return in a month. 

            He had kept up his practice – to little or no avail – She had not returned in a month – but everyone else seemed to become increasingly patient with each day. 

            "HIYA!" Sashimi jumped into the air and threw a punch. Sashimasu caught it in her open hand, grabbed her wrist and pulled her forward. Her knee flew up, but Sashimi put her other hand out and used the knee as a spring board to jump over her head. 

            Yukidaruma sighed and held his hand up in front of his face. His eyes turned white and a dry ice mist slithered up his arm. The light was as far away as ever. The mist disappeared, he dropped his arm and his eyes became filled with ice blue and disappointment. 

            Sashimasu caught Sashimi. Yukidaruma wasn't really watching or paying attention; but he could tell she was caught on account of the high pitched laughter that always followed the little girl's capture. Sashimasu power noogied her daughters hair, "Yur gettin' better, baby!" ^__^ 

            Sashimi squirmed and laughed and screamed. This was part of Sashimi's self defense training, and Yukidaruma had been sitting with them, listening to that high pitched laughter while trying to conjure light for exactly 7.5 months. 

            "Okay! Who's up for laps!?" Sashimasu sang as she released her daughter.

            "Yay!" Sashimi screamed and ran down the path laughing. She grabbed Yukidaruma's sleeve as she passed him.

            "GUWAH!" he was taken by total surprise. She dragged him down the path behind her as she ran off. Sashimasu laughed out loud and ran after them.

            A while after they disappeared someone familiar came up the  path using a staff to get over the puddles and dents in the road. It was Shin'yo – rounded noticeably with the weight of motherhood. She groaned mentally as she looked up at the temple ahead of her and looked paler. "I feel - like such a whore!" T_T

(end flashback)……………………..*********&&&&%%%%%%%%%%%%


	26. Daggerclaw

[_Disclaimer]_

_Scorpiogal__: Better Now. _

_Sango__: Finally - - ;;;_

_Scorpiogal__: School is almost over for me! -_

_Kagome: Yeah? Well I'm stuck doing schoolwork throughout the series!_

_Scorpiogal__: Anyway, now I can hopefully focus on the chapters I've been waiting for. Cause, gosh darn it, I'm a sucker for surprises!   _

_Disco Music starts playing_

_Scorpiogal__: Remember all, I do not own Inu Yasha, but I do own Shio and stuff! -_

_The male characters come out dressed as The Village People in a straight line _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Young man!_

_Inu__: There's no need to feel down – I said – _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Young man! _

_Inu__: Pick yourself off the ground – I said – _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Young man!_

_Inu__: 'Cause you're in a new town, There's no _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Need – to – be – un – hap –py – Young man!_

_Inu__: There's a place you can go, I said – _

_Inu__ Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Young man!_

_Inu__: When you're short on your dough, you can _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: stay there – _

_Inu__: And I'm sure you will find – many – _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Ways – to – have – a – good – time _

_drum beats_

_Inu__: It's fun to stay at the –_

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Y – M – C – A!_

_Shio__: It's fun to stay at the – _

_Inu__, Sess, Kouga, Shio, Miroku, Jakotsu: Y – M – C – A!_

_Scoria: You know what? I can play this song on the flute! -_

Chapter 25: Daggerclaw

            Sango sighed heavily and cast a not surprised look in Kagome and Inu Yasha's direction. Kagome glanced sheepishly back at her and gave a nervous laugh. They both looked at Inu Yasha who still had swirly eyes and still smelled like fresh cut flowers sprinkled over a babbling brook with a hint of lemon.

            "What are you going to do with us?" Kagome asked.

            The samuri sighed loudly, tired of having to explain the plot. "I'm keeping you three as bait until Aka Shio comes. Then I render him helpless and let you all go free _if _he decides to come peacefully."

            "What do you mean '_if_''?" Sango asked.

            "Well, I just mean that Aka Shio seems like the kind of guy who would abandon the people he loves in order to save his own skin." The samuri replied icily.

            "Don't let _him _hear you say that,"

            Miroku appeared on the scene glaring at the samuri. "If you had actually taken the time to know Shio, you'd realize that even he has an honor code – unlike some people."

            The samuri was quiet for a moment before asking, "So I take it you know him, too?"

            Miroku nodded once.

            "Fine then," the samuri drew another rope and daggers weapon with a white cord tying the daggers together. "The more the merrier!"

            Miroku poised himself in a battle stance with his staff ready. The only difference between this weapon and the one used to capture Kagome was the color of the cord between the blades. Pure white, with spell scrolls tying them to the daggers. He was unsure of what the spell was exactly. It was obvious in his eyes that the samurai wielded a stolen magical weapon – but what was it for?

            Suddenly, at the moment that the samuri was about to throw the white rope and daggers, a hidden dagger was pulled out instead and thrown right in the direction of Miroku's face.

            (AN: Duck, bishi, duck!)

            Miroku threw his head back and the dagger missed him by mere inches. But once his head went back, the samuri launched the white rope and daggers.

            They wrapped around Miroku's legs, knocking him off of his feet. He moved to get up when all of the muscles in his arms, legs, and stomach cramped up horribly. Miroku gasped and cried out in pain.

            "Miroku!" Sango cried.

            "Get up, Miroku! Get up!" Kagome shouted.

            The samuri grinned and casually walked over to the fallen Monk. "You like that, huh?"

            Miroku twisted his neck to look up at the samuri. Beads of sweat rolled off of his face. "What – what did – you – do to – me?" he asked painfully.

            "It's not what _I _did to _you, _Houshi," the samuri kneeled in front of him, "it's what you did to yourself." The samurai tapped him on the forehead. "I'm not a demon, not am I in anyway holy," the samuri gestured to the spell scrolls that locked the rope and daggers tight. "Heck, I didn't even make this weapon! I "borrowed" it from a priestess whom had discovered the little known fact that all priests are corrupt. And this weapon was made to take down the pope, Houshi – boi!"

            "Holy shit!" Sango sweatdropped. "This guy is a freakin' criminal mastermind! How the hell are we gonna get out of here alive?!"

            Kagome sighed half heartedly, "We're boned."

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"I've got it!" Shippou exclaimed.

            Hologram Sumiko and Inu Onna looked up at him alertly.

"What does the baby fox got?"

            "Osuwari."

            "Heh! Yeah!" Shippou tapped his index finger against his forehead. "All I have to do – is not say _anything_!" he laughed victoriously and folded his arms. "Yah! Inu Yasha won't know I taught Inu Onna that word unless I admit it or something! And that won't happen! No it won't!" He grinned and struck a pose. "Who the fox?"

            "You the fox!" - Hologram Sumiko exclaimed.

            "Who the fox?"

            "You the fox!"

            Shippou gave the V for victory. Sumiko lifted her chin up and sniffed the air. "Kitty's back!"

            "Really?" Shippou got up and went outside.

            The girl was right. Who else but Shio came strutting up a dirt path with a jug of sake over his shoulder. Shippou held his nose as the fox/dog got closer, cause man o' man did he reek of alcohol!

            Shippou could also see that he was drunk as a dog. (AN: Get it? )

            Shio sang under his breath as he approached, "I'm a gigolo, always on the go – every time I turn around I've got another show – "

            "Shio!" Shippou shouted.

            The pimpmaster yawned and dropped the jug of sake in the dirt as he went inside the hut, not really noticing Shippou's presence at all. Shippou followed him inside, "What happened?? How did your dates go??"

            Shio flopped down on the floor next to Hologram Sumiko and Inu Onna. Both girls tried to stifle the smell of drugs. He sighed and leaned against the wall, closing his eyes in a sulky melancholy way.

            It was plain for Shippou to see that they now had a brooding drunk on their hands. "Did they suck?" he asked.

            Shio made a sound through his teeth and grumbled, "I wish." He rolled himself off of the wall and lay on his back massaging his eyelids. "Oh god – they put something funny in that sake - I know it."

            "You didn't find a mate at all?" Shippou asked, amazed that several chapters of opportunity had gone by and Shio had found not a single possibility. Shio stopped rubbing his eyes and shrugged. "It's like impossible for me to get a break in life!" then his eyes grew wider as he noticed his hands. "_Woah__!......._My hands are _big_!" OO

(AN: You know what they say about big hands! )

---------------------------------------------------------------------(flashback)&

            A circle of rocks were made in the zen garden outside of Shin'yo and Sashimasu's home. Inside of the circle was a pile of more rocks set up two feet high. They held Shin'yo's staff of crystals vertical to the sand. Shin'yo stood back to look at her set up. She closed her eyes, looking deep inside of herself. She saw light, bright radiating energy coming directly from her womb. The light rolled, the light kicked, the light slept; the light had ten fingers, ten toes, green eyes, a little nose, X and Y chromosomes, and a warm beating heart.

            Shin'yo opened her eyes as two trails of tears ran down her cheeks. She closed her eyes again and turned toward the sky. The clouds rolled and rumbled around above the Zen garden. Then when an opening came, a beam of light shot out of the clouds and landed on the staff.

            Sashimi, Sashimasu, and Yukidaruma looked upward at the swirling clouds.

            "Ominous." Sashimasu commented.

            "TORNADO!!" Sashimi screamed and went to duck and cover.

            The beam of light from the sky began to thin and recede. The clouds stopped spinning and with a thunderclap, it began to rain. The rakings in the sand weren't getting destroyed by the raindrops. Shin'yo opened her eyes and saw the crystals of her staff gleaming with godly light. She took a step over the sand of the garden. Her shoe didn't touch the sand below, but the sand rippled like the surface of water. She walked over the top of the sand and took up the staff in her right hand.

            Sashimasu, Sashimi, and Yukidaruma paused at the end of the garden. Shin'yo gave off a light aura. Lo and behold, they were in the presence of a goddess.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

So there they were, all lined up and tied up in a row of convieniently close planted trees. Miroku sulking on the far left side, Inu Yasha the high kite, Kagome hoping the wind wouldn't make her skirt fly up, and a disappointed Sango on the far right. She glanced over sadly at where Kirara lay unconscious.

Miroku looked disappointed too though. The samuri had removed the purity weapon after tying him up to his own tree, he was just sulky about the way he had been caught. "I so could have lasted longer in that battle, had the samuri not-"

"-Cheated. We know Miroku." Sango narrowed her eyes off to the side in annoyance. "You've repeated that sentence 3 times already, you're starting to sound like a little brother."

"Yeah, but I really was cheated!" T T he whined.

The samuri had left them alone a few moments ago with the remark, "I'll be right back! Don't you go away now!"   

Sango snorted, "What a punk. If only I were free, I would-"

"I'm back lovelies!" came the samurai's voice from what looked like a completely different person. For one, the samurai no longer looked like a samurai. Still as short as Kagome, the samurai wore a specially designed Magenta armor that was tighter and smaller then the other armor to allow for flexibility and speed. There was no sheath for a sword, but the gloves were slitted over the knuckles for artificial claws.

"Allow me to introduce myself," the fake samurai smirked evilly. "I am Daggerclaw."

Miroku gasped. "No way! I've heard of you!"

"Really?" Daggerclaw asked in an amused tone. "Did they also tell you how I can be defeated?"

"Well – no – not really…." Miroku sweatdropped. "But at least I know who you really _really_are!"

The samuri's expression didn't change, but paused for a few moments. "Oh?"

"Yes, that's right!" Miroku glared back. "You might be able to fool everyone else but I can see it. In the way you fight, in the way you act – your very voice gives you away."

The samuri's smirk somehow changed into a dark glare.

Kagome and Sango blinked.

"What'chu talkin' bout, Houshi-sama?" Sango asked.

"Yeah! What she said!" Kagome added.

Now it was Miroku's turn to smirk. "Oh, is it a secret? I don't believe in keeping secrets from my friends."

Daggerclaw's eyes grew even darker to serve as a wordless warning.

Miroku looked at Sango and Kagome, "Can you not see it, ladies?" he motioned with his head toward Daggerclaw. "Our new friend here is only pretending to be a –"

_SHWONG!_

Miroku went out like a light as Daggerclaw's elbow connected with his skull. Now they had two swirly-eyed men in their group.

            Sango sighed irritatedly, "Crap. I feel like an American."

            Kagome looked at her with a similar expression on her face. "What? Confused and fed up?"

            "Alrighty then!" Daggerclaw growled, pacing back and forth impatiently in front of the captives. "He's taking too long to come to the rescue, so we're going to have to entice him." Daggerclaw turned to the girls with a devious smile. "Any volunteers?"

            Sango and Kagome looked at each other nervously.

-------------------

            Shio watched the ceiling spin around – stop – blurr slightly – then spin around really fast. He moaned, covered his eyes and rolled over onto his stomach where he wouldn't have to look at the ceiling. Hologram Sumiko came over and rubbed his back.

            Shippou came through the door with a wooden dipper balanced in hand. "Got the water for you, Shio!" he smiled cutely, holding it out to him.

            Shio sat up and took it gratefully, "Thanks, Meat." Shio replied gruffly before taking a long sip.

            Shippou looked over at Inu Onna. The puppy had crawled up to the window and just sat there staring out into the forest. By her reflecting, Shippou could see a serious scowl like the one Inu Yasha got during or at the start of a fight with a demon. Or maybe the look was how Kagome looked before she gave Inu Yasha the command to body slam the dirt?

            Shippou waddled over to her. "What's wrong, Inu Onna?"

            She scampered away from the window and over to Shio. She gave a couple of yips, nudging his shoulder with her head.

            Shio just moaned. "Mmmmm….no Inu Onna, I don't want to play right now."

            She gave a bark and a few desperate mews, nudging him harder to get up.

            Shio only turned his head to face her. Still beautiful, but tired and dizzy from excessive drugs.

            "Arf! Bark!" Inu Onna crawled over to the door and barked outside. If only she could talk. She looked back at Shio, wondering if he could at least see that she wanted him to follow.

            Shio watched her for a few moments, then turned his head toward the wall.

            "Grrrrrr!" Inu Onna growled deep in her throat. It was in no way threatening. She sprung forward and chomped her new baby canine teeth down on the fox/dog's silky auburn tail.

            Shio: O  O

            "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

            Kagome, Sango, and Daggerclaw turned their heads in the direction that all of the birds in the forest were flying away from.

            Kagome: OO

            Sango: OO

            Inu Yasha:

            Miroku:

            Daggerclaw: OO ;;;; "What the hell-?!"


	27. Lover's Light

Chapter 26: Lover's Light

            "Oi! Oi! Wake up!"

            Daggerclaw patted the side of Inu Yasha's face.

            "He's not unconscious, he's just off in lala land!" Kagome said.

            "Shut up! I know he's not unconscious!" Daggerclaw shouted back at her. Finally after numerous attempts, the kidnapper decided to try a more direct approach.

            Between chapters, Daggerclaw made a nice little campfire (and was smart enough to put a bucket of water next to it).

(Smokey the Bear: Only _you_ can prevent forest fires!)

(Scorpiogal: - - ;; Only me?)

(Smokey the Bear: Only _you_.)

(Scorpiogal: And nobody else.)

(Smokey the Bear: That's usually what "only _you_" means…)

(Scorpiogal: Does that make me a super hero or something?)

(Smokey the Bear: _No_.)

(Scorpiogal: ………)

            Daggerclaw lifted the bucket and tossed a cold wave of stream water into Inu Yasha's face. The hanyo coughed and sputtered in shock and looked at Daggerclaw like the freak was a nut job.

            "Morning, Glory!" Daggerclaw replied cockily.

            "What the fck is your problem?!" Inu Yasha shouted.

            "You're my problem btch!!" Daggerclaw shouted back.

            "If I'm your problem then why don't you just fcking let us go btch!"

            "Because I'm using you, btch!! I got a schedule to keep up with here!!"

            "Ahem, uh, hello there?" Sango interrupted. "We have a plot to be doing."

            "Right." Daggerclaw walked over to the campfire and drew a dagger whose blade was resting in the flame. Holding up the glowing blade, Daggerclaw pointed the dagger at Kagome's throat.

            She gasped and looked down at the wielder of the weapon in terror.

            Daggerclaw simply replied. "Start screaming."

            Inu Yasha struggled in his bindings furiously. "You bastard! I'm gonna _kill you_!"

            "Shut up, I haven't done anything – yet." Daggerclaw didn't even look over at him when making this comment. Kagome had to know the seriousness that this was not a request. "Didn't you hear me? I said start screaming."

            Kagome felt her throat tighten up. She wanted to scream, she really did. She probably would have screamed whether asked to or not. But for some reason, nothing was coming out. "I – I can't…" she cried.

            "Sure you can," Daggerclaw replied with a serious expression. "Just imagine yourself in bed with your little playmate over there." Daggerclaw made a head gesture in Inu Yasha's direction.

            Kagome gulped as a bead of cold sweat ran down her neck.

            Daggerclaw nodded. "I'll leave you to that." Going over to Sango, the next command was made at knifepoint. "You – will start moaning. Moan like you're living your wildest fantasy."

            Sango raised an eyebrow at Daggerclaw, a bit disturbed.

            When approaching Inu Yasha, the hanyo appeared as if he wanted to stab his claws into the hostage taker's eyes. Daggerclaw raised a dagger to the dogboy's throat. "You know how a dog demon sounds when it's getting some right? Of course you do. I want you to sound like that."

            Inu Yasha shook his head looking down at the assailant murderously. "I swear to fcking god, you'd better god damn hope that I never get free."

            "Do what you're told, and that's all." Daggerclaw stated. The kidnapper went over to the fire, prodded it with the dagger, then left the blade in again. "The louder you are, the more you call out someone's name, the more realistic you all are, the less I point my daggers at you once Shio gets here."

 ------------------------------------

            A high pitched scream rang through the forest. Inu Onna leapt out of the foliage, quickly sniffing the air to make sure she was going the right way. She rotated her head and body alertly twitching her ears fearfully. With a frightened scurry in her take off, she dashed off on the trail. Shio burst out of the foliage like a wild dog. His claws extended in an anger reflex and with a vicious growl dashed after the puppy. Hologram Sumiko tried her best to keep up with him while holding Shippou. Her crying pleas wheren't exactly good for her stamina either. "_Please, Kitty-chan! She's only a baby! She didn't know you don't like to be bitten there!_"

            He may have been super quick and stuff, but he was still loaded up on drugs. He zigzagged more then Inu Onna did as she tried to keep him from catching her before she got to the battle site. She made a sharp turn causing the drunk dog to make an even sharper turn and fall down a very steep hill. Inu Onna slumped down in the dirt panting heavily. Too much scampering. Then suddenly she heard a howl. The baby looked up in it's direction.

Sounded like her daddy. There was her mommy and that other person screaming too. Inu Onna patted her hands against the dirt and looked back in time to see Shio clawing over the side of the hill-like cliff. He snarled angrily, "Disrespectful, evil little-"

She pushed off and led him in her parents' direction.

Inu Yasha drooped his head forward breathing heavily. He bared his demonic fangs which looked much longer then usual. Then after a few deep breaths, he through his head back and howled amorously.

Kagome answered with ardent cries and soft gasps, almost writhing in her bindings.

Sango moaned and said Miroku's name a couple of times (by accident or for real no one was quite sure).

Daggerclaw stood off to the side scowling in another direction, blushing a bit. The kidnapper thought they were getting way too into it.

Miroku was still knocked out from the punch, though Daggerclaw gagged him just incase he woke up sooner then he should of. Oh if only the perverted priest were awake he'd be in happy land.

Inu Onna burst through a bush like she was being shot out of a cannon. She flew through the air with her arms out like superman. Daggerclaw glanced up at her in confusion. The pup dashed over to Inu Yasha's tree. She slid down the tree trunk on her first hop, but on her second she was able to get a good grip on her father. She crawled up his fire rat suit and climbed inside his shirt, shaking and panting like a hypervenalating little leaf!

Well Inu Yasha and the others had stopped doing their sound effects the moment they realized the minor was present. Inu Yasha looked down his shirt with a sweat drop. "Inu Onna!"

She looked up at him, still scared and hugged his washboard chest. From the same bush came none other then Shio. He took three steps and fell over disoriented.

"Inu Yasha, is she okay?" Kagome asked.

"She's fine, just a bit shook up." Inu Yasha said then glared down at his friend. "_Shio__!"_ he shouted.

The dogglefox didn't move.

"_Shio__!"_Inu Yasha shouted even louder, sounding like a drill sergeant. "_Get up, you drug induced bastard! What the hell are you doing chasing my puppy?!_"

Shio made a suffering sound and moaned. "Too much physical activity…" then he chucked and muttered, "Physical."

Daggerclaw froze wide eyed staring down at him. Kagome looked at the bounty hunter's expression curiously. She expected another arrogant smirk, or an evil leer of some kind. But now Daggerclaw looked shocked and very much horrified!

That expression remained until composure was found and an intensely murderous glare fixed in the kidnapper's eyes. Daggerclaw reached up to the helmet of the suit, and attached a mouth/nose mask piece. The bounty hunter raised armored fists and metallic claws sprang up from their sheaths. "Get up, you sick little whore! Face me like the man that you're not!"

Shio just kind of lay where he fell. The drugs made all of the words that Daggerclaw said sound funny. Shio giggled, "Dude, you're armor is pink!"

Daggerclaw glared dangerously at him.

"Shio, I don't think he's kidding!" Sango warned.

Shio rolled over onto his back and looked up at the bounty hunter lazily. Then after a moment he smiled again and cooed, "Hey sex-say lay-day!"

Daggerclaw's eye's went as wide as they could possibly go.

Inu Yasha burst into laughter.

Sango and Kagome sweatdropped.

Kagome sighed, "We're really screwed aren't we?"

"He is a total idiot." Sango grumbled.

Daggerclaw growled and thrust a claw up close into Shio's face. Shio just stared at it glassy eyed. "Get up, or I'll slice that boy band face of yours up!"

"Hey, hey." Shio reached out and pushed Daggerclaw's hand away. "Now look," he said drunkly from his laying position on the floor. "I didn't want to be drunk in pub – lic. I _was _drunk in a bar – but "they" threw me out into pub – lic. I wanted to be drunk in a bar…..Arrest them."

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Daggerclaw groaned in confusion. Giving an exasperated sigh, the bounty hunter went over to the camp fire, put it out and began to gather supplies.

"What are you doing now?" Sango asked.

"What does it look like?" Daggerclaw said. "It's obvious that I didn't even need to threaten him with your lives, he practically came to me defeated! I truly expected more."

"Are you still turning him in?" Kagome asked.

"Of course!" Daggerclaw said. "Like I said before, he's worth a tone of clams."

"What would you want clams for?" Shio asked drunkly.

"_Shut up_." Daggerclaw snapped. The bounty hunter pulled out some rope and walked over to Shio.  

"STOP!" A whirlwind of leaves flew in as hologram Sumiko appeared in front of Shio with a hand on her hip and the other hand out in front of the approaching bounty hunter. "Stop in the name of the slaw!"

"_Law_." Inu Yasha, Kagome, and Sango said at the same time.

"Right, law! What did Sumiko say?" the hologram asked.

Daggerclaw extended claws threateningly at her. "You wanna die, little girl? I am known to kill men, women, _and _children."

Hologram Sumiko dropped her hands to her side just standing in front of Shio. She stared seriously into the eyes of the predator. "Then go ahead, Sumiko is small and frail. Make her move."

Daggerclaw looked taken aback, as if this response came completely unexpected. After a moment, the bounty hunter grabbed the front of the little girl's kimono and raised a metal claw in the air for strike.

"Sumiko," Shio raised his head and tried to lift his torso off of ground, but the world just spun for him and he helplessly fell flat again.

Daggerclaw didn't move to make the attack, but glared at the little girl who's eyes remained empty of fear. Hologram Sumiko looked back into the bounty hunter's eyes. She saw intense anger at her and someone else, perhaps Shio at the way he'd been yelled at. She also saw confusion and hesitation. There was racing thought taking place within that magenta helmet.

 Daggerclaw snorted and lowered the claw. Instead the bounty hunter grabbed her shoulder and shoved her aside harshly.

"_Oomf__!"_Her tushy hit the ground and the hologram shattered creating a large puff of smoke. About fifty or so berries showered the forest floor.

Daggerclaw took the rope and made a loop in the middle for Shio's hands to go through. As the bounty hunter leaned over the dog/fox demon, Shio took that moment to sit up.

_BONK! _

Shio and Daggerclaw's foreheads rebounded off of each other's and they were both laying on the dirt. Shio clutched at his forehead whining in pain. "OWieE!" he exclaimed. He gritted his fangs together and his tearing eyes remained tightly shut.

Daggerclaw on the other hand, was praying thanks for not having a cracked skull. With eyes closed tightly, Daggerclaw reached up to feel for blood.

There _was_ blood.

Daggerclaw's hand moved farther up and felt a deep crack in the forehead of the helmet. The bounty hunter gasped.

With one hand still grasping his skull, Shio helped himself up, still under the effects of drugs. He posed for combat in his dysfunction anyway.

Daggerclaw right away began to do the same. The collision had made the hunter dizzy and eyesight blurred every few moments. "Damn it," the hunter muttered, "I only let – my guard down for a moment." The hunter flung some of the blood off onto the dirt with a hand then stood ready with claws raised once more. "I'll still take you down."

Shio cracked his knuckles contracting his own claws. "You're making a big mistake, kid….Messing with my friends and such,"

Kagome suddenly couldn't help but smile. She knew that Shio wouldn't abandon them. And that sicko Daggerclaw kept going on about how he would sacrifice them in order to save himself. It made her feel a little proud, "Yeah! Get 'em, Shio!"  
            "You can do it, Shio!" Sango called.

Shio glanced at her a bit surprised that she actually cheered for him for once.

"If you die out there, I'll kill you, fox/dog!" Inu Yasha shouted.

Shio winked at 'em all and turned his attention back to Daggerclaw. "Ready to rumble?"

"Have at me, Cure!" Daggerclaw rushed him in a fury of metal swipes. Shio was able to dodge most of them, seeing as how he was demon and even though Daggerclaw had super speed, the hunter was human. But take notice as I say he dodged _most _of them. A couple gashes striped his arms, legs, and bare chest.

Leaning forward, Daggerclaw felt a vengeful head pain for all of the jumping around and fighting just then.

Shio grimaced in pain. Oxygen did not feel good on open wounds. He looked at his cuts and thought to himself, '_Oh shit! I'll never find a mate at this rate._' The dog/fox demon sighed and raised a hand to his beating heart. "Oh well." He said out loud. Thin lights began to glow inside the knuckles of that hand. _'I'd better end this before that human cuts something else important._'

"You're toast slutboy," Daggerclaw announced, "Just look at you now. It's true what my clients say, 'I always get my man.'" The bounty hunter charged him again, claws raised for a speedy attack.

The lights inside Shio's knuckes became ringlets running through his knuckles between his fingers. He made his hand into a claw shape, drew back his arm and released his ultimate attack.

_"Lover's Light Claw!" _he cried as he swung his claw. The ringlets grew out and flew at the bounty hunter in sickle shaped flares. A high pitched ringing sound followed as the glided over the forest floor digging up a path of broken earth as they came.

Before Daggerclaw even knew what was happening the light blades struck. The bounty hunter's body shook violently with each hit, as if getting nailed by a shotgun. The magenta armor shattered into thousands of metal shards, scattering across the ground like glass. The bounty hunter hit the ground with a loud _plop_, laying motionless in a puddle of blood and splintered metal.

After a moment, Shio realized the cheering coming from the ladies off to the side. He smiled at them and waved with a happy little smile like this =

He even waved a little.

"You did it, Shio! You beat him!" Kagome shouted.

"Great! That punk was getting on my nerves!" Sango called excitedly.

"Good work, pal!" Inu Yasha shouted. "Though I wish you coulda saved some for me!"

"Thatza…" Shio stared, then fell forward with the smile still on his face. He lost consciousness and the forest went quiet.

Inu Yasha, Kagome and Sango looked down at him for a few moments.

"Um…."

"Yeah."

Sango looked at her companions with a sweat drop. "So….how _are_ we going to get down from here?"

"……………………….."

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

iIMPORTANTE!  :  If you go to the website in my bio, I uploaded _tons _of drawings onto my website! So go check it out, yo!

Pictures of Sumiko, Sashimi, Shio, including Shio's YMCA outfit, comic, and tons of others! glee!


	28. I'm a Believer

Chapter 27. I'm a believer

            "One moment," Shippou untied the roping around Sango's feet. He crawled up higher to get her hands.

            "Thank you, Shippou," she said.

            Once Kagome was free, she decided to set up the infirmary. She sent Inu Yasha to get her backpack so that she could have her first aid kit. He did it compliantly, for once. He wouldn't have let her go alone to get it, but he went by himself because it was just quicker that way.

            So once that was accomplished, Kagome spread out a black two person beach towel covered in smiley faces with their tongues ladling out. Inu Yasha walked over to Shio and looked down at him with a dry scowl. His shadow fell over the fox/dog at an angle. Inu Yasha's shadow did not block the sun, but Shio was still and the light didn't seem to bother him. From light nicks to deep lacerations, that Daggerclaw really did a number on him.

            Inu Yasha rubbed his hands together briskly, reached down at lifted the bishi up by his underarms. He began to drag him over to the blanket like he was dragging a boxer out of the ring. "Maybe this'll teach ya to stop using drugs." Inu Yasha grunted.

            "Oh you're one to talk," Shippou jumped on his shoulder. "Remember that party you went to once with Shio and you were completely wasted and-"

            BONK!  
            "HEY!!" TT Shippou shouted angrily.

            "Just shut up and go free Miroku, will ya?!" Inu Yasha growled.

            Kagome tsked as the sliced up bishi was laid on the other side of the blanket, "It looks like I'm going to need more bandages after this."

            Inu Yasha sat on the other side of Shio, scowling at her. "So, are you saying you "need" to go back to your era?"

            Kagome could already see where this was leading, and she didn't feel like it. "Come on, Inu Yasha; gimme a break for once!"

            "I'll give _you_ a _break_ alright," he replied.

            "Osuwari."

            WHAM!!

            Inu Yasha yanked his head right back up. "Bitch! What was that for?!"  
            Kagome shrugged innocently. "It wasn't me!"

            "Oh yeah, like someone else can use that godforsaken spell against me!" he shouted sarcastically.

            "Osuwari!"

            WHAM!

            "I said, stop it!"

            "I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!!" Kagome cried.

            "THEN WHO DID!?" he shouted back.

            All of a sudden, Inu Onna climbed onto his head and peered down into his face with her pouty little scowl. She looked him straight in the eye and said, "Osuwari!"

            WHAM!

            The puppy scampered off of him and over to where Shippou was getting Miroku down. Kagome stared in the direction she left in surprise.

            Inu Yasha pulled himself back up looking both angry and in pain. "Damn it, out of all the words in the Japanese language, she had to choose that one as her first!"

            "Osuwari!"

            WHAM!

            "INU ONNA!" her father shouted.

            "No, that was me that time," Kagome stated and waved a finger at him. "I don't want you saying bad words in front of the baby."

            "Screw you!" he said sitting up.

            "Yes well, that's what got us into this in the first place." She gave him a flat look.

            He blinked back at her wide eyed.

            Sango picked up Kirara gently. The kitty woke up and looked up at her master happily.

            "Kirara?" Sango looked confused. Before, she was suffering and dying! Now she was wagging her tail, rubbing her cold nose against Sango's hands and purring – that cat was a hundred percent well!

            "I don't understand!" Sango said in total shock. Then she noticed the small leaf the samuri placed over Kirara's nose. She slowly pealed it off and held it up to her face. It smelled strongly of medicine. 'What is this?" she asked herself. "Is this the antidote that psycho was talking about?" she looked at Kirara shocked. "Did he cure you after all???"

            Kirara gave her a mew without meaning.

            This was awfully strange to Sango. Most kidnappers and such only cared about themselves and would lie to get whatever they wanted – but Daggerclaw took the time and effort to appropriately administer an antidote to Kirara. Sango looked upward deep in thought. "Just like he said he would," she whispered.

            She stood there, thinking for a few moments before she felt a hand rubbing her behind. She opened her eyes wide in alarm.

            SLAP!

            "What is wrong with you?!" she shouted at him.

            Miroku stood there calmly with a large red handprint on his face and a smile. "Just trying to lighten the mood, hehe."

            Kagome was almost done with the bandaging. As she looked for the spot where she set the medical tape down at, Inu Yasha leaned over Shio, modestly concerned.

            "He'll probably be unable to continue in his search for a mate for a while, you know." She said patting the ground around her with her hands trying to find the tape.

            "Nah," Inu Yasha replied. "He's a demon, he'll heel fast. Then he'll be back to woman chasing before you know it."

            "Speaking of woman chasing," Kagome looked up and called, "Hey Miroku! Do you have any need for medical assistance?"

            Inu Yasha gave her a funny look, "What are you, the red cross?"

            Kagome ignored him, "Miroku! Tell me now, before I put the first aid kit away! Do you need any help or what?!"

            Miroku knelt down next to where Daggerclaw collapsed, examining the body. After a moment he nodded once in confirmation and carefully tried to lift the body out of the scattered metal shards.

            "What are you up to, Miroku?" Sango came over and asked. "He's just a corpse now, isn't he?"

            Miroku grunted as he lifted Daggerclaw's body into his arms. "Nope."

            "Do you need help getting him over to the blanket?" Sango asked.

            Miroku smiled at her sweetly. "Nope – nope – but thanks for the offer, Sango-san."

            She blushed lightly and watched him walk over to the blanket. Kagome pushed all of her supplies off of the other side of the blanket and Miroku laid Daggerclaw down next to Shio.

            "Hey," Kagome said looking at Daggerclaw's body now that the metal refuge had been stripped away. "Wait a minute,"

            "Oh, no way," Shippou said staring in shock.

            "That's what I was trying to say before Daggerclaw knocked me out," Miroku replied sitting the body up for better view. Under the metal, Daggerclaw had worn a white kimono shirt and pants, but even that got ripped up a lot. Daggerclaw now had no shoes, but still had very small feet to match the height of the body. The skin was pale white where the blood wasn't flowing. The armor made Daggerclaw look muscular, but under and up close, their kidnapper and "amazing fighter" had a relatively small bone structure and looked rather thin and frail. The face was young and heart shaped, and the scalp cloaked it in long, black human hair that went as far as the elbows in length. The body had short legs and well proportioned pear shaped body. Without the armor, this Daggerclaw person would have come off as none other then a young, innocent teenage-

            "Girl?" Inu Yasha asked in confusion.

            "That's right," Miroku nodded.

            (AN: He's just like Encyclopedia Brown, isn't he? )

            Kagome remembered when Shio saw Daggerclaw. She had thought he was drunk when he said, "Hello sex-say la-day!"

            "Shio must have known, too!" Kagome said.

            "I don't know, Kagome," Inu Yasha commented. "Shio _loves_ woman, and he seemed pretty okay with slicing her up."

            "Well yeah, but look at this!" Kagome pointed at the various wounds all over Daggerclaw's body. "When he did that ultimate attack – it looks as though he missed all of her vital points on purpose!"

            Everyone agreed with her.

            "Sango, can you help me with her wounds? There are more cuts here then an episode of The Sopranos." Kagome declared.

            "Sure," Sango moved around to the other side of the first aid kit and they started at opposite sides of the body.

            Miroku watched them, then looked at Daggerclaw's face again, "She's very lovely – in a earthy, natural way, too. I wonder why she would want to dress up like she did and pretend to be a man?"

            Sango glared at him while she bandaged. "Keep your eyes in your head there, Houshi-sama."

            "What?? I wasn't looking at her!" he said defensively.

            "Yes you were! You just described how pretty she is! You know you weren't really just looking at her face..." Sango said bitingly.

            Miroku paused looking at Sango with a hurt, puppy dog expression of his own. (AN: Cute! ) "Sango, you have no need to worry." He snuck up behind her somehow and placed his large hands on her shoulders.

            Sango jumped and paused mid bandage.

            He leaned his forehead against the back of her head. "You know that you're the prettiest girl in the land."

            Kagome smiled and put her hands together joyfully. Aside from being an Inu/Kagome fan, she is also strongly a Sango/Miroku fan.

            Inu Onna hopped ontop of Shio's chest and sat on it like a cat. Shio moaned and turned his head toward Inu Yasha. Kagome tensed up and sweatdropped. Inu Yasha looked down at him casually. "Rough day?"

            Shio moaned with a sick, unhappy expression on his face. T T "Horrible, hellish day, man! Each date didn't go well for me at all! Some of them were really weird, some of them scared the hell out of me, some of them really surprised me in a bad way!" he moaned again. "I also got my tail bitten by a puppy, and I fought some really hard core fighter while I was trying to be under the influence and forgetting about my pain, now I'm in pain both emotionally and physically! TT At this rate, I'll never find a mate!"

            "Oh come on, Shio!" Kagome said with an unusually large smile on her face and a sweatdrop. "There's a girl out there for you, you've just got to know where to look." She glanced at the girl behind him.

            Shio just sighed, feeling demoralized. "What's the use of trying?" he asked tiredly. "All you get is pain! Ow!" He reached up and held one of the bandages on his arms looking straight up into the clouds. "When I wanted sunshine, I got rain," he sighed again, closed his eyes and turned his head. When he opened his eyes, he was face to face with the unconscious Daggerclaw. "Who is that?" he asked in a casual, calm, yet interested tone.

            "That's Daggerclaw!" Kagome almost said too excitedly. She covered her mouth and added, "That person you were just fighting with, remember?"

            Shio looked around in six different directions. "I – think – so…..Does that mean it _wasn't_ a dream?"

            Everyone facefaulted except Inu Onna who sat upright ontop of Shio's chest.

            Suddenly, Daggerclaw exhaled deeply, and began to turn her head from side to side slowly.

            "EEK! She's waking up!" Shippou jumped on top of Inu Yasha's head and began to gnaw on it nervously.

            BONK!

            "QUIT Hitting ME!" Shippou shouted holding the lumps on his head.

            "I will when YOU quit annoying me!" Inu Yasha shouted back.

            Daggerclaw opened her eyes and looked around as her vision started to go into focus. "Wh – where am I?" she spoke in a different voice, that was…..much more feminine then before.

            "Hold still," Kagome tightened the bandage around her upper arm.

            "Ugh!" The girl felt the pressure of the bandage tightening. "Where am I?!" she asked much more firmly and in a tone of voice that was still feminine yet harsher like the one she used as a samurai. She squinted around at everybody in somewhat of a daze. "Who are you, what do you-?" she turned her head and her eyes widened as she was right in Shio's face. His eyes widened nervously.

            "_You_!" she shouted. Shio made himself back away, afraid of being hit. She tried to move but instead got fifteen miscellaneously placed stabbing pains all over her body. She grimaced in pain and a drop of sweat rolled down her forehead.

            "Don't move! We're not done bandaging you yet!" Sango ordered.

            Daggerclaw began to make herself sit up, through the pain. "_I – I don't need – your help!_" she choked and coughed halfway into a kneel. She brought a hand up to cover her mouth as she coughed violently. She looked at her hand which now had blood on it.

            Kagome and Sango began to make her sit down. "Okay, now that's generally a _bad _sign…" Kagome stated.

            _"Let go of me…Let go…"_ Daggerclaw complained in a pained voice. Once they pushed her back down on the beach blanket, she didn't try to get up again. She moaned, as if she wanted nothing more then to leave.

            "Gee, I'm sorry."

            "Huh??" she looked at Shio wide eyed. Whether she was angry or scared, it wasn't easy to tell.

            He looked at her with a guilty yet cute and innocent expression on his face. "I'm sorry I gave you so many owies, please don't hate me."

            _"H-hate you?!"_ she hissed, she started to sit up again. _"It's – too late for – that, - slut – boy!" _

            Miroku, Sango, and Kagome had to really work to get her to lie back down but they ended up having to hold her down. "You'd better …… kill me now!" she threatened. "Because my main objective……is to turn you in, punk-!"

            "Okay, you're getting too excited," Sango commented.

            Then Daggerclaw rounded on them. "If you motherfckers care about that creature so much, you should leave my wounds open, take him and run to the ends of the earth!"

            "Yes, well, we're stupid like that," Kagome said.

            Shio was in shock, he slowly sat up. Already his wounds were beginning to magically heal themselves. "Why do you hate me so much?" he asked.

            Miroku, Sango, and Kagome finally pushed her down again. She glared up at him with a coldness that could start an ice age. "Because you're you," she spat. 

            ---------------------(flashback) &&&&&&&&&&&(())#HF:LEFG

            Shin'yo stepped onto the white tile path of the zen garden. She delicately dusted off the front of her kimono, eyes cast downward as if avoiding their gazes. Sashimasu began to walk toward her.

            Somehow, Yukidaruma's teacher seemed different to him. She looked the same, but her presence was much different. It was hard to explain just how he saw her as different. Her newfound power though, was aided by her enchanting mystery.

            "_You_…Bitch!" The palm of Sashimasu's hand connected with the velvety smooth surface that was her best friend's left cheek.

            Shin'yo was forced off of her feet by the strength of the blow. She held her cheek with a pained expression on her face. It wasn't physical pain, but sympathy and guilt pain that kept her of the concrete.

            "How could you do this to me?!" Sashimasu cried at her. Shin'yo merely sat on the concrete looking at the tiles. She held her cheek with a demure gesture, while keeping a firm grip on her staff.

            Angrily, Sashimasu grasped the front of Shin'yo's robes and pulled her face inches from her own. "Tell me why you would do something so horrible!!" Sashimasu cried out. Shin'yo only looked upon her with sorrow.

            Yukidaruma sidestepped like a crab over to Sashimi and whispered, "_I don't understand! What is she talking about?_"

            Sashimi sighed sadly and lightly squeezed his arm. He looked down at her hand nervously then at her serious and saddened face. "Mother speaks of a crime worthy of the seventh circle of hell."

            Yukidaruma gasped.

            (Jack Sparrow: "-The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers.")

            "I know the intensity of my wrongdoing," Shin'yo replied. "And I do not blame you for your hate – but you must understand – please understand, Sashimasu, I'm sorry, I love you, I would never mean to hurt you or your family in a thousand years - !"

            "HATE?!" Sashimasu threw her back on the ground. "A pitiful word like hate doesn't even come close to describe the loathing that I feel!" she pointed down at her. "You Shin'yo, are no friend of mine!"

            Tears lined Shin'yo's eyes, but she couldn't bear to look up at Sashimasu. "I am a fool for what I did. I am eternally sorry."

            "Sorry isn't going to make that child in your womb any less of a whore then you!" Sashimasu insulted her venomously. A whirlwind of fiery blue light erupted around her. A locket that had been hidden in the lining of her kimono lifted itself out, conducting Sashimasu's uncompleted yet dangerous silver light magic. "For what you did, I can never, _ever _forgive you! Not for anything! You are not my friend. A friend wouldn't hurt a friend the way you have!" Sashimasu sobbed. "The damage you did not only affected me, it affected my whole family!" The energy from around her drew toward her open hand. "I'll never forgive you for this. Never!" She squeezed the ball of light energy in her hand and moved to hit Shin'yo with it in a quick and powerful motion. Shin'yo quickly raised her staff and countered the shot-put like energy Sashimasu held above her head.

            Shin'yo looked up at her with a serious yet sorry expression. Sashimasu wouldn't let go of the light she was holding and pushed it down heavily on her friend. From the past, Yukidaruma had learned that Sashimasu was much stronger then Shin'yo. Sashimasu was a fit woman who could literally juggle her daughter, her best friend, and Yukidaruma all at the same time. Shin'yo could barely lift a chair.

            At the moment, Shin'yo seemed to be having no problem fending off her friend's dog demon strength. Shin'yo answered the confusion by saying, "The completed light is much stronger then what we once had, Sashimasu. You won't be able to hurt me." Shin'yo's light intensified and she blew Sashimasu back by the force of her aura.

            Sashimasu fell back but recovered quickly, "You do realize – that we can never be friends again?" she asked. "And we cannot both exist at the same time….the only thing to do, is to get rid of one, so here I give you your punishment." she lifted her sword and that was when Yukidaruma closed his eyes and turned away.

            He heard the crunching sound of blade breaking skin, piercing through meat and scraping against bone. Sashimi gave a soft gasp just before her mother gasped inwardly in demonic voice.

            When he looked back, he saw Sashimasu fall to her knees while letting her back bend hunch forward. She held her clawed hands inches away from the hilt of the double bladed sword she had used to skewer her own ribcage. 

            Shin'yo looked on at her, frozen in total shock and disbelief.

            Sashimasu looked up at her with a glazed expression and clenched teeth. "Farewell, Shin'yo! May the memory of my name and the time we spent working together serve as a constant reminder of our would-be-friendship as you give birth to my man's child and make love to him in the night!" Sashimasu fell over on her side and the light evaporated from her body.

            Yukidaruma looked toward Sashimi. The child was horrorstruck. Yukidaruma had never seen her so distressed and it frightened him as well.

            "_Sashimasu_," Shin'yo whispered hoarsely. She dropped her staff and ran to the cold body of her deceased friend. The enchantress kneeled in the puddle of blood and held Sashimasu's corpse, crying into her curly silver hair. As the blood shallowed out near the edges of the puddle, it began to trace the cracks and separations in the white tile.           

            Shin'yo herself was despaired to a point where she didn't notice that the blood had seeped into her green robes like a they were coffee filters. From hugging her, the blood had covered the front of Shin'yo's robes as well including over the rounded belly of her unborn light child.

            The sky somehow became a lot darker. That night, there wasn't a star in the sky.

(end flashback)%%%%%%


	29. Mamori

_[Disclaimer:]_

_[Scorpiogal sitting in a hammock between two closely planted trees. Wearing baggy clothes, star-shaped lensed prescription sun glasses, and sipping a HiC juicebox. Sumiko is off running through the sprinkler, laughing each time she makes a run through as if she just can't get enough. She is wearing a one piece bathing suit and waterwingies. Shio is sitting in one of the trees the hammock is tied to like it's a lawn chair. He is wearing long kaki shorts, an olive Hawaiian shirt with palm trees and coconuts on it, and a pair of shades protecting his beautiful eyes.]_

_Scorpiogal__: takes a long sip of her juice box Summer – be – gude. B-)_

_Shio: You can say that again, Scorpi.___

_Scorpiogal__: looks over the tops of her shades at him with a flat look You can't say that at all. You don't even work, MisterMan…_

_Shio: I work! said defensively I work a lot! I thought I was trying awefully hard to find a mate in the past few chapters!_

_Scorpiogal__: Hmmm…remembers something speaking of which, did you know that the past twelve chapters have all happened in the course of one day?? ;;;;_

_Shio: raises a finger and adds And counting…_

_Scorpiogal__: sweatdrops and takes another sip Also did you know, that I don't own Inu Yasha?_

_Shio: If anyone has been paying attention to the disclaimers at all they would know that…_

_Scorpiogal__: So that's everyone – good – just supposed to make sure….takes another long sip ……._

Chapter 27: Mamori

            "So what's yur name, Daggerclaw?" Kagome asked just before tightening a bandage on the newbie character's upper arm.

            "Ugh," Daggerclaw grunted at the pressure on her arm. "What do you mean, 'What's my name?'"

            Daggerclaw had come to understand that she wouldn't be able to attack Shio let alone get away without five star medical attention. So she sat upright on the beach blanket with her arm raised for Kagome to bandage. Until further notice, she would stay calm and take it like a ma – I mean woman.

            "Like – you're name!" Kagome replied with a shrug as if it were obvious. "I mean Daggerclaw can't be your _real_ name, right? That's like naming your daughter 'floozy'!"

            Daggerclaw gave Kagome a glare that showed that she didn't seem to like this analogy.

            Kagome sweat dropped and waved her hand a little to show that she didn't mean anything bad. "At least you understand what I'm trying to say right?"

            "Sure, I understand." Daggerclaw nodded her head. "But I only tell a select few my real name. What makes you think I can just trust complete strangers like you? Especially after I used you as bait and threatened your lives…"

            "We're pretty trusting," Kagome assured her.

            "And forgiving," Sango added. She sat behind Daggerclaw, brushing her long black hair for her. "In fact, we're too forgiving – just look at the guys we travel with!"

            Daggerclaw nodded in agreement. Sango had made a very good point. "Very well then. I trust at least you two girls, I'm sure you understand what it's like to be a woman during these times."

            Sango nodded in amen.

            Kagome looked at her curiously. "Why do you ask, Daggerclaw? Have you had trouble in your past from being a girl?"

            Sango gave her a raised eyebrow as if she had asked an idiotic question.

            "I mean girls have always been treated differently, I was just asking if she had any really bad treatment."

            Daggerclaw shrugged a little as if it were no big deal. Must not have been a likeable topic for her. "Nothing more then what women usually get. You know how both of your parents want you to act angelic and obedient and all of that happy housewife crap? From the very beginning I was different! I didn't want to be girly or angelic, I wanted to go out into the world – learn things, see things, do things! But mostly, I wanted freedom, and a woman can't get that! Not now at least – someday I'm sure that women will have they're freedom, but I wanted it now!" She sighed and the three girls were silent for a moment. Kagome looked at her with a respectful admiration.

"So then I started to pretend to be a male and I got much more respect! Though I haven't had a boyfriend in a _very_ long time….Actually never…" Daggerclaw added with a light tint of pink on her cheeks and neck. "But – I now am much farther then I ever would have gone if I had stayed at home and learned to cook. Now I can make my own cash and pay people to cook for me so that it doesn't really matter."

Sango began to stitch a braid at the back of her hair.

"Please, don't bother," Daggerclaw said. "I'm just going to hide my hair or chop it off later."

"You know you still haven't told us your name," Kagome reminded her.

"Yeah, my name is Mamori." She said. "I don't even know who made up the name Daggerclaw, it just sort of appeared with the legend and rumors so I went with it. Until then, I just pretended that my name was Minoru…" she trailed off as she glanced forward and glared. Sango glanced over Mamori's shoulder and Kagome turned to look as well. Miroku sat a few feet away with his staff upright resting his chin on his hand. He watched Daggerclaw with an intrigued expression.

"Girls, if you will look straight ahead, you will see one of the many reasons why I pretend to be a man," Mamori told them.

"What are you looking at Houshi-sama?" Sango asked sharply.

He blinked at her before replying, "Well it wasn't anything perverted this time, I was just noticing how different she is from how she's described in the tales."

"Mmhmm, yeah, sure," Kagome said with narrowed eyes.

"Just keep walking, Houshi," Sango said.

Miroku stood up and went to go sit with Shio.

"Osuwari!"

WHAM!

"Damn it! Stop saying that!" Inu Yasha shouted.

"Osuwari!" Inu Onna shouted back.

WHAM!

Shippou sat a few feet away laughing his tail off.

"That's it!" Inu Yasha raised his head and gripped the dirt under him. "The moment this spell wears off, Kagome is in so much trouble!"

"Huh, wha?" Shippou stopped laughing. "Why her??"

"Isn't it obvious? She's been sitting me so much that she taught Inu Onna how to do it too!" He finally jumped up to his feet and began to stomp in the direction of his mate.

"Wait, Inu Yasha! You can't do that!" Shippou jumped up and clung to the dogboy's sleeve.

"Why not??" Inu Yasha snapped.

Shippou grew ten sweat drops. "Eh…er….becuase…um…" ;;;;;;;;

Well the kitsune should have known this would happen. Though he regretted that he could only give but one life for Kagome.

"Do you promise not to hit me?"

"What??"  
            "Do you promise not to hit me or what??!"

"Okay, fine! I won't hit you! Why?"

"Because, um," Shippou gulped and blurted out anxiously, "IsortaaccidentallytaughtInuOnnahowtosityoou!" He clentched his eyes shut waiting for the pounding. When it didn't come he opened one eye.

BONK!  
            "HEY! You promised, bitch!" Shippou cried angrily. Inu Yasha grabbed him by the head. "Well guess what you'll be doing for the next few days Shippou-kun!" Inu Yasha said dangerously nice.

"Ow…" Shippou winced at Inu Yasha's grip.

"That's right! You'll be _un_-teaching her that word!" Inu Yasha said in a voice as sweet as vinegar and acid. _"Won't that be fun??"_

"Y-yes?" Shippou asked.

 "Well! I'm glad you agree!" Inu Yasha remarked. He bonked Shippou on the head again and walked away.

Shippou pouted into the dirt and began brainstorming plots of revenge.

Inu Onna scampered after her daddy, circling his legs as he walked, looking up at him admiringly. He sighed and sweat dropped then sat next to Kagome.

Because of the restlessness he caused, Shio was moved a bit farther away from Daggerclaw on a one person Looney Tunes Beach Towel.

(AN: Did you know that the Japanese voice actor for Inu Yasha also played the voice for Bugs Bunny in Japan?)

He was well enough now to sit up on his own. He sat with his knees arched, legs spread, and one hand propping him up from behind. He had pulled his shirt off of his shoulders revealing all of his bandages and partial view of his muscles under the bandages. He had unraveled the bandaging around his right hand moments ago and was now licking the the stripe that was between his knuckles and wrist on the center of the top of his hand. It didn't require much thought process so he was already spacing out while tasting the dried blood and thinking of nothing in particular.

Mamori glanced over at him without expression on her face; probably either thinking or also spacing out. Kagome finished up the bandaging and glanced over at Shio as she began to put the tools away. "So why are you after him again?"

"He's worth a lot of money," Mamori replied. "Plus I _hate _prostitutes and players of any form."

Sango began to watch him too. "You know he's not really a prostitute so much any more." She said. "He's actually trying to find a mate."

Daggerclaw snorted, "Once a floozy, always a floozy." She stated.

Suddenly Shio looked over at them alert when he realized they were watching him.

With slow reaction time, they became alert too and looked away in all different directions nervously. Shio paused in his licking, but continued to watch the girls interestedly. "What's up?" he asked.

"Nothing," Kagome answered quickly.

Too quickly.

"Just an A – B – C conversation." Sango added trying to make it sound less suspicious….but failed.

Shio blinked before nodding and smiling at them. He turned back to his wound watching them out of the corner of his eyes with a sly smile on his face.

Sango and Kagome realized it was the look he got when he was scheming something manipulative and they grew sweat drops. Daggerclaw just looked away darkly yet nervously. "He's dangerous." She whispered to the other girls. "Maybe not in a violent way – but he has legends, too."

Shio's smile widdened as he kept licking his hand. His eyebrows bent his smile into a sly, smug little smirk that was just too nasty. When the girls looked back at him out of the corners of their eyes his tongue appeared noticeably longer. Their eyes widened and they blushed trying to look away. But it was hard not to look away so they would just keep looking away for a moment before looking back at him. He continued to smirk as his tongue grew a few inches longer. It grew about six to eight inches as suddenly stopped licking his hand and licked around his mouth as if hungry. Sango dropped her brush and turned around hugging her legs. Kagome turned to hide in  Inu Yasha's chest who was glaring at Shio with several sweat drops.

Since Daggerclaw was new she wasn't as immune as the other girls were so she couldn't take her eyes off. She just looked on his a bright blush and a horrified, shocked expression.

He suckled the tips of each of his fingers, licked the webbing between his fingers and just sucked on them too with a hungry wanting expression in his eyes.

Miroku suddenly appeared behind Shio not looking pleased, he knocked the fox dog on the head with his staff then went over to comfort Sango.

The girls felt sorry for sending him away before. They apologized formally to him.

"Sorry, Houshi-sama," Sango said.

"Sorry," Kagome added still clutching Inu Yasha who hugged her back.

"It's okay, it was only a kitusne illusion," Miroku patted Sango on the back hugging her.

Mamori nodded to him, "I apologize," She shot a dark glare in Shio's direction with leftover blush still on her cheeks.

He just smirked back and winked secretively.

Kagome finished putting away her first aid kit. She would probably have to get it out again soon, but she wasn't sure why. She was trying to get the thought of Shio's super tongue out of her mind with thoughts of homework. (AN: Several past chapters = one day = new homework…)

Kirara settled down on Sango's lap. Her ear gave a little twitch, she mouth opened for a little yawn, then her eyes closed for a little nap. Inu Onna crept over, and raised her chin about the kitties level and looked down at her with large interested eyes.

Sango looked down at her, knowing that Inu Onna would probably wake Kirara who probably needed rest after the poisoning; but Sango really didn't try to stop her because they didn't have cable back then. Inu Onna blinked, then reached out a small hand giving the cat demons fur a smooth stroke. Kirara's fur bristled.

Inu Onna stroked the fur two more times with both hands. When Kirara began to fur, Inu Onna smiled and continued stroking her happily. Sango smiled down at Inu Onna. It wasn't exciting, but it was definitely cute. Sango stroked Inu Onna's silver hair. "You like kitties huh? Well that's ironic for a half puppy demon."

Inu Onna rubbed her face in Kirara's fur and continued to pet her. Kirara smiled contently in her nappie.

Kagome smiled at Inu Onna then mused aloud, "She's a sweetie, isn't she?"

"Oh very sweet." Sango said with a sweat drop and a smile, remembering the exercise Inu Onna gave everyone yesterday.

"She's cute – whose is she?" Mamori asked. "The mother side I mean," she glanced at Inu Yasha. "It's obvious to tell who she takes after on the paternal side."

Inu Yasha gave a dry scowl and glanced away from the group.

"She's mine," Kagome waved slightly with a little blush. "We had her a short while back, Inu Yasha and I."

Mamori suddenly paused as if some important thought hit her. Then all at once her eyes grew in realization and she looked at Kagome meaningfully, "Did you say, Inu Yasha?!"

Kagome looked taken aback. "Ye-yeah, why?? Is he wanted somewhere too?"

The noob started freaking out. She gasped and brought her fists up under her chin like a fan girl. "Oh my god!" complete OOCness. Oo She looked in Inu Yasha's direction. "THE Inu Yasha?!?"

He leaned away from her nervously. "Eh…."

"No way!" Despite her wounds, Mamori was in his face in seconds. "Oh my god! I can't believe it's you! Small world! Will you autograph my fists?!?!"

Miroku, Sango, and Shippou watched her in wonder.

"Uh…." Inu Yasha was so confused he just complied and nodded his head.

In minutes he wrote his name on her right fist in henna ink.

She looked at the back of her hand starry eyed. "Wow! This is so cool! I'm actually meating THE Inu Yasha! Ha HA!"

This was so weird it was creepy! Oo

"What do you want his autograph for?" Sango asked her.

"He's THE Inu Yasha!" Mamori mused again like a fan girl. She sat still staring at her fists in wide eyed wonder. "When I was young, my gaffer, used to tell me stories about Inu Yasha and the shrine maiden Kikyo!"

The mention of Kikyo's name gave the air an awkward feel.

"Wow!" Mamori mused again, not noticing the awkwardness.

"Mamori, why don't you come rest on the beach blanket." Kagome said patting the spot she was just sitting at.

"Fine," Mamori said disappointedly. She gave Inu Yasha one last glance, in the way Souta would whenever Inu Yasha came to visit, or the way Shippou did when he was watching Inu Yasha in a winning battle.

"Maybe she's Souta's cross-gender-incarnation or something," Kagome mused aloud.

"No, no, Souta's incarnation is that whimpy kid from Scorpiogal's other fics, you know the one who plays Miroku's cousin?" Sango reminded her.

"Yeah! She's right!" Miroku leaned in and said.

"That reminds me, whatever happened to Musuko?" Kagome asked herself and whoever was listening, "Wasn't he supposed to be born before Inu Onna? He's born before her in all of the other fics she's written!"

"The writer must be kickin' herself for screwin' that one up," Shio commented.

Ahem…

"That was weird." Inu Yasha said, still a bit freaked out.

……..

"But Inu Yasha's with you now, so he broke up with Kikyo?" Mamori asked Kagome curiously.

Kagome looked uncomfortable. "Um…..I think so –"

"What do you mean you think so??" It was Mamori's turn to look confused. "He had a child with you, shouldn't that mean he's with you now??"

"Well," Kagome looked down at her hands deep in thought. "I'm not sure exactly – he never really said that he's not with her any more, and he still kinda sees her every once in a while, and he did promise he's go to hell with her and stuff…..We never really talked about it I guess….."

Mamori looked at her in complete shock. So Kagome _had _suffered under the controlling hand of Mankind. Mamori turned her head and gave Inu Yasha a disgusted look similar to the one she gave Shio durning the battle.  She held her fist out in his direction, the one that had his name on it. "You'd better hope to god that this washes off!!" she shouted at him.

She turned around with a huff and folded her arms bitterly. "My gaffer never mentioned that this jerk was such a womanizer."

"I'm not a womanizer!" Inu Yasha barked.

"I think this evidence proves that you are, two face!" Daggerclaw barked back. Then she winced and held her ribcage.

"You're getting excited again," Sango commented.

"God, they're all the same," Daggerclaw said irritatedly. Kagome watched her pout. Something about the way she said it was sorrowful.

Daggerclaw gave a small hand gesture waving the subject off. "It's something you have to get used to though. Toys get older, men get colder, and they always want new and better toys in the end."

Kagome gave her a sad expression.

Inu Yasha's ears twitched. "Do you hear that?"

_"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"_

Everyone looked in different directions at the source of the noise.

"There! Up in the sky!" Shippou cried and pointed his finger straight up above his head.

Everyone looked up.

"It's a bird!" Miroku exclaimed.

"It's a youkai!" Sango exclaimed.

"It's an octopus!" Shippou screamed.

"No! It's…" Kagome trailed off.

Sumiko came falling out of the sky in adult form, her arms and legs spread out like an X. A huge compass in her right hand. "_EeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE__!!!!!!!"___

SPLAT!

She landed right on top of Shio.


	30. Weapons of Mass Destruction

I do not own FLCL or Bender the robot

Chapter 29: Weapons of Mass Destruction

Sumiko sat up on his stomach, shook her head, and looked down at Shio. He lay on the ground in pain, dead to the world, with swirly eyes. "Thanks for breaking my fall, Kitty-chan!"

Everyone sweatdropped.

Mamori blinked a couple of times. "I like her, who is she?"

"That's Sumiko, Shio's little sister." Kagome explained.

"Ohhhh…." Mamori looked at the little girl in astonishment.

Sumiko sat facing Shio with one leg on each side of his ribcage. She looked at her compass which was making constant ticking sounds. Her eyes lit up with joyous light as she exclaimed, "Vitolitto is near by!!"

She waved the compass around the air above her watching the needle. Everyone watched her, confused but interested enough to watch and see just what it was she was up to. By paying attention, they might also get to see this 'Vitolitto' thing she kept talking about and searching for.

Suddenly, Sumiko looked down at Shio. "Alright, Bubby! Doorway found!" she tossed the compass of life over her shoulder. Luckily, Shippou was there to catch it.

Sumiko grabbed Shio and flipped him over onto his stomach causing him to moan painfully. Bending her elbow, she raised her hand above her head dangerously. With a dark cackle and a large happy grin, she laid her other hand aside Shio's head near his left ear. Shio turned his head a bit and looked up at her a bit frightened. He squinted from the pain of her landing on him in his bandaged condition. "S-Sumiko?" he asked weakly.

"Hya!" Sumiko drove her hand deep down Shio's right ear, probing for something and digging _deep._

Shio screamed painfully and struggled to get up, but Sumiko was in her older form, and she held his head down with her other hand shoveing the side of his face into the earth. She was stronger then him. He clawed at the earth under him and tried to buck her off (he's very good at bucking) but even that didn't get her off.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! STOP IT, SUMIKO! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!!!"

"Hold still, Shio-sama!" she demanded above his screaming.

"YOU'RE HURTING ME, GET OFF!!"  
"IT'LL ONLY TAKE A SECOND SHIO-SAMA!" Then suddenly, she ripped out of his ear a long golden staff with spiral carvings going this way and that across it's cylinder sides. Hovering just above the tip of the top of the staff was an hourglass about the size of her hand. Though the hourglass only had regular white beach sand and a wooden base, there were two wings attached to the narrow middle. They flapped a couple times as if they were alive. Several small white lights erupted from the extracting of the staff, but otherwise, Shio's ear seemed pretty intact.

He had stopped struggling, but now clutched the ground shivering and whimpering loudly. Sumiko held it up in the air triumphantly and the sun reflected off of it's metallic sheen causing a glare. "Vitolitto is mine!" she exclaimed.

Everyone else looked on in awe at the staff but they were just as surprised at what just happened.

"Neat!" Inu Yasha pulled a disposable camera out of his shirt and snapped a quick pic.

"Impressive!" Kagome gasped. All of the girls in the group were in awe and blushing deeply.

"_Sashimasu_," Shin'yo whispered hoarsely. She dropped her staff and ran to the cold body of her deceased friend. The enchantress kneeled in the puddle of blood and held Sashimasu's corpse, crying into her curly silver hair. As the blood shallowed out near the edges of the puddle, it began to trace the cracks and separations in the white tile.

Shin'yo herself was despaired to a point where she didn't notice that the blood had seeped into her green robes like a they were coffee filters. From hugging her, the blood had covered the front of Shin'yo's robes as well including over the rounded belly of her unborn light child.

Sashimi hung her head, her silver locks of hair shadowing her eyes. Her mouth a thin line of tension.

"Sashimi?" Yukidaruma looked at her worriedly. What would happen to her now? After seeing something so horrible, she would probably never be her cheery self again. "Are – are you okay?" he asked uncertainly.

She sniffed, congested. Slowly, she lifted her head to look at him. Thin trails of tears ran down her smooth, young cheeks. Her bright eyes were now dim and sorrowful. They pierced his soul and terrified him. He had never seen her look this way.

Suddenly, Shin'yo moved to stand up, using her staff as a prop. So it was over. Sashimasu killed herself and being full of hatred, she would manifest herself as an angry spirit - unable to rest – wandering the earth for all of eternity….

"I think not." Shin'yo made a cross in the air with her staff then thrust the staff outward in front of her. The red crystals set into the staff head glowed brightly. A ringing sound vibrated through the air and a thin white light opened a doorway in the space in front of her.

The doorway became tall and wide. It was full of bright light. After a few moments, a beautiful woman stepped out. She had long, wavy black hair, snow white skin, and a beautiful ebony dress with pearls sown into the lace. She spoke clearly, "I am Sarrongon. What is your destination?"

Shin'yo answered her in an equally clear, yet commanding voice, "Death."

"So that is Vitolitto?" Kagome asked.

"Hai!" Sumiko cried rapturously. She hugged the staff, tracing the carvings with her thin fingers. "Isn't it beautiful?!" She ran her index finger down the side of the hourglass causing its tiny wings to flutter madly.

Shio whimpered in pain and Sumiko cast him a sympathetic glance. "Oh, poor Shio-sama," she held his chin and turned it to face her. His eyes were full of pain and his cheeks were slightly flushed. Sympathy aside he looked as though he had just orgasmed. "I'm sorry I hurt you, Kitty-chan," Sumiko apologized. She cupped her hand over his ear gently taking tender care not to bother the nerves. A white light misted the palm of her hand as she began to take away his pain.

"So what exactly does it do Sumiko?" Kagome asked reaching out to touch the staff. Sumiko whipped it away before she could touch it and she twirled it around. The little fox girl staked it's end into the ground next to her and pointed at Inu Yasha. "Dogboy, come on down!"

Inu Yasha's eyes widened slightly. "What? Why?!" He leaned away from her a bit. Whatever she was up to it probably wasn't good.

"You know why, sillyhead!" Sumiko laughed. Then she swallowed just before she said clearly and loudly in a voice quite like his, "Why is Inu Onna _my_ daughter? Why was she born _now_? I mean if this had happened at a time where I wasn't so confused or in the middle of trying to figure out what I'm going to do about the future, I might have been ready! What am I going to do? I don't know what to do about Kikyo or Kagome…who am I supposed to choose? Die for Kikyo, or raise a baby I never had a choice about? What's right? Is making one of them unhappy inevitable? I'm so confused."

Inu Yasha looked at her with large eyes that were obviously gushing horror. He had a very small smile but it was a scared one. A very light blush glazed his cheeks. "Kami, you have a good memory." He said trying to sound like himself. His voice cracked every other syllable with nervousness.

Shio sat up softly rubbing his ear and watched Inu Yasha with a raised eyebrow of interest over the matter. "Déjà vu." He whispered in a low voice.

Sumiko plucked her staff out of the ground and spun it above her head a couple of times. Everyone backed away as a high pitched whistling sound began to vibrate through the air. Suddenly the older Sumiko's face hardened, her eyes narrowed in concentration. She grabbed the staff with both hands and pointed it forward. The hourglass filled with light. A stream of which created a large door that could fit ten people across appeared six or so feet away; radiating energy and filled with light. From the side of the light door facing Sumiko, stepped a boy with bright platinum hair cleanly cut around the nape of his neck. He was wearing a white and silver tuxedo as if he were from Kagome's time. He stepped through as if the light he stepped out of was made of plasma. He took a couple steps, dusting his tuxedo jacket off, then stood up straight.

He was about Shio's height at least before the boy put that top hat on. He looked up at Sumiko with beautiful silver eyes. She looked up at him with her large green eyes glittering. He raised sophisticated gloved hands to the front of his jacket. He held the sides of his collar and said, "I am Vitolitto. What is your Destination?"

Sumiko answered in an equally clear yet calm voice, "ANGEL BOY!!!!!!!"

Vitolitto's eyes widened slightly.

Sumiko threw herself at him, knocking the both of them over. "OMG!!! HI!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!! YOU'RE A LOT OLDER THEN YOU WERE BEFORE!!!" She hugged him rubbing her cheek against his with a large happy smile. He struggled and blushed and argued, "Get off!! This suit's expensive!!" His top hat rolled away.

Shio picked it up.

"I MISSED YOU ANGEL BOY!!!" Sumiko hugged him tighter and everyone heard several bones popping.

Then a shadow fell over the both of them. Sumiko and the breathless Vitolitto looked up to see Shio with his arms folded. A vein popped on his forehead and his right eyebrow twitched. "Hey dawg, I don't believe we've met."

Vitolitto made a choaking sound.

"Sumiko, why don't you introduce me to your little _friend_ here?" Shio asked, sounding unusually tense.

Sumiko jumped back up taking the boy with her. "This is the angel boy, Shio! He helped me get my Vitolitto, he did!"

"Really?" Shio asked calmly.

Vitolitto and Shio's eyes never left each other. For some reason, Shio seemed to look taller then him at the moment.

"He's sweet, and pretty, and – gee, he was shorter and younger before, I don't know how he got like he is now, ya know -?" Sumiko went on.

Lightening cracked between their gazes.

The link was broken when Sumiko glomped him again. This time, she didn't knock the both of them to the ground. "What'cha doin' here, Angel boy?"

"I'm not an angel." He declared. "And I happen to be this height right now because this is the height I am supposed to be when you first get your staff." He raised an eyebrow at her. "You're a little cheater though. You found a way to make yourself look older. You weren't supposed to get your staff till you actually were 17 or 19."

"Yur so cute!" Sumiko hugged his arm, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder.

Shio glared at him and his eyebrow ticked again.

Vitolitto closed his eyes before he went on, "You haven't given your answer, Lady Sumiko – What is your destination?"

"Right!" she shouted before letting go of his arm. "Destination: Subconcious!"

"Righto," Vitolitto gave a short bow before turning back to the doorway. A platform appeared at the foot of the doorway, awaiting passengers. Vitolitto nodded his head forward, "After you, Mistress."

He caught another glare from Shio at the word "Mistress".

"Alright everyone, get on dat platform, der'!" Sumiko crowed as she did a carwheel out onto it.

Everyone just stared at her as if she were F-in cRazy! Oo

"What?" She asked.

"Not what," Sango said.

"Why?!" Kagome asked.

"Because! Destination: Subconcious guys!" she shouted enthusiasticly, as if that were enough to convince them to come aboard. "Come on, it'll be wild!"

"How wild?" Shio asked. "Party wild, or being pulled into a black hole wild?"

Sumiko rolled her eyes and declared, "That's not a good comparison Kitty-chan, both of them cause pain!"

"Yeah, but party-pain is a fun kind of pain! Pulled-into-a-black-hole pain is worse then death by $$-fck!" Shio exclaimed.

"This is really important! And it's not painful at all!" Sumiko shouted. When no one moved she turned to the most understanding person she knew. "Come on, Kagome! Don't you want to figure out who Inu Yasha likes better??"

Kagome looked at her surprised.

"Oh, sure, play that card!" Shio barked.

"Come on, Shio! I know that you wanna know too!" Sumiko said.

"I already do know! But I'll go along to see what the knowledge of the universe says." He stepped out onto the platform and put both hands on his belt.

Kagome stepped forward. She reached out to see what would happen to her if she passed through. Her white hand passed through the light unharmed, unaltered, as if it were a regular open doorway. She stepped through and squinted a little from the bright light. She shielded her eyes before turning around and looking back through. She shrugged. "Nothing. I'm fine!"

Miroku looked around before shoving Inu Yasha forward a little.

"What?? Don't push me, Monk!" the dogboy snapped. He picked up Inu Onna then stomped over and passed through the light boldly.

"I'm going too," Sango nodded to Kirara. With a mew, the kitty hopped onto her shoulder and they both passed through. Miroku followed suit. Shippou hopped onto his shoulder and gripped the monks robes.

"Fine! Leave me here!" Mamori shouted at them.

"Shio, go get her!" Kagome whacked him upside the head.

"Okay! Okay!" Shio stumbled out and went over to her.

"Don't touch me!" Mamori snapped at him as he approached. "I'd rather have the two-faced dogboy do it then you!"

"Calm down, I won't lay a hand on you – probably." He lifted her up and headed back to the portal as she struggled. "No! Put me down you sick bastard! I hate you!" she insulted him as she struggled.

"Well we can't leave an injured human female here for the demons to have their way with." Shio replied calmly.

"An injured human _female_? Why does it matter if I'm human or female??" she asked as the portal closed.

They waited in silence for a moment as everything around, below, and above them was white.

"Are we going to move?" Sango asked.

"We're moving right now." Vitolitto said. "Quite fast, too."

"I don't feel like I'm moving at all." Kagome declared.

"Do you ever feel the earth rotate?" he asked.

"No."

"Well this platform works in a similar way," He stated. "Special gravity balances work as an elevator under immense speeds so that you can stand comfortably instead of dying in the most horrible fashion imaginable."

Shio scoffed. "Dying in the most horrible fashion imaginable is death by $$-fck."

"_Goo_." Inu Onna said.

Inu Yasha raised an eyebrow at her. "What does that mean?"

"It means that she's not old enough to talk yet, Inu Yasha." Kagome replied.

"Yeah, but she's old enough to use word spells on me isn't she??" Inu Yasha loomed at Kagome. "I half blame you!"  
"What?? Why?!" Kagome looked at him shocked.

"Shippou might have been the one who taught her how to say it, but you're the one who used it all the time! You…..word user you!!"

"Sit." Kagome said.

WHAM!

"Hey!" Vitolitto snapped. "Don't break the platform!! You jam it, you buy it!"

"Sorry." Kagome said, not really sounding sorry.

"Yeah sure." Inu Yasha grumbled glaring at her.

"Okay, we're here!" Vitolitto called. Another portal door opened up on the other side of the platform.

Inside was a huge metallic cavern. The middle of the cavern was a small lobby-like oasis. Narrow walkways led from the oasis to other doors and hallways carved into the cavern walls.

"This isn't actually the subconscious." Vitolitto declared. "This is the memory center. It's the closest place to the subconscious."

"Why didn't you just go to the subconscious then?" Sango asked.

"The subconscious is a mess!" Vitolitto said. "If I were to take everyone up there, at least half of you would get lost forever amongst the random thoughts."

"Well that already happened to Sumiko long ago." Shio pointed at her and she nodded in agreement.

Vitolitto turned to face Sumiko like a soldier, "My suggestion is, Mistress, that you take the hanyou and leave the others here while we go search. Though it will have to be quick."

Sumiko nodded before patting Vitolitto on the head. "Sound gude." -

Vitolitto glared dryly at her.

"Eh!" Inu Onna clung to Inu Yasha. It was unlikely that she understood the words they were saying, but she knew that her daddy was going somewhere.

Inu Yasha sighed and made like he was about to pull her off. "Come on Inu Onna, you gotta stay here with Kagome."

Inu Onna looked up at him with huge puppy dog eyes as big and water as lilly pads. Inu Yasha sweatdropped. He looked away and closed his eyes, "Eh, Kagome? A little help?"

"Come on now, baby!" Kagome came over and tried to get her off of him, "We have to stay here, Inu Onna…….. let daddy go with our nice friends……boy, she's got quite the grip there!" Inu Onna held fast to Inu Yasha's jacket.

Kagome wasn't about to yank her off of the jacket and risk injuring those wittle baby claws, but she didn't stop trying.

Shippou climbed up Kagome and onto her arm. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a squeaky toy shaped like a bone. He held it out under Inu Onna's little wiffer and squeezed it. _'Squee!'_

Inu Onna's eyes went wide with interest. Shippou moved the squeaker over closer to him and Kagome and squeezed it again. _'Squee!'_ Inu Onna's eyes followed it. She let go of Inu Yasha without hesitation. Climbing back into Kagome's arms, she snatched the toy from Shippou.

Inu Yasha backed off dusting his jacket off looking back at his pup. Inu Onna held the toy up in a fond curiosity. She squeezed it. _'Squee!__ Squee!' _then she stuck one of the corners in her mouth and bit down, _'SkeewEee!'_

"Well that was easy." Kagome commented.

"Okay peoplez," Sumiko spoke up. "Stay right here, we'll be right back, okayz?"

"What are we supposed to do until then?" Shio asked her.

"For one," Vitolitto began as he walked over to Miroku, who was reaching out a hand toward the lining of a fountain in the middle of the oasis. The white stone that made the fountain had beautiful carvings depicting evolution, growth, and metamorphosis. Vitolitto smacked his hand away. "Don't touch ANYTHING!" he snapped.

Miroku just held his hands up in defense and backed away innocently.

Vitolitto glared at all of them threateningly. "NO TOUCHIE! And if anyone walks by, don't talk to them! Don't leave this area!" he warned as he backed toward the door from which they came. Sumiko pecked Shio on the cheek and gave them all a happy little wave before scampering after her new servant. Inu Yasha followed after giving his friends a second glance.

"So – what are we supposed to do if one of us needs to use the toilet?" Sango asked.

* * *

Sorry this took so long. ;;; I've been having a lot of surgery and stuff. Hope you like it though! I worked long and hard on it.


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